The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 04.23.25

The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 04.23.25

Live from New Orleans, LA

Your hosts are Ian Riccaboni, Excalibur & Taz

Master P joins us to start, giving us all terrifying flashbacks to 1999 WCW, and he introduces the Opps. But before Joe can celebrate their title win, the Death Riders interrupt. And it’s a heel beatdown as the Death Riders are apparently very sore losers, but Mox goes after Master P and that allows Joe to pop up like the Terminator and choke Mox out. But then the Young Bucks and Okada save for Moxley, and Swerve also comes out with Kenny Omega to flank the heels, and this all seems to be setting up Anarchy in the Arena at the PPV. Plus Joe challenges Moxley, which should be pretty awesome when it happens.

Meanwhile, the Patriarchy celebrates Nick Wayne’s TV title victory, although Christian immediately claims the belt for himself (“Your mother and I celebrated your victory extensively”) and then Nick takes it back as Cage stomps off.

Ricochet v. Mark Briscoe

Ricochet milks the bald chants for a bit, but Briscoe slugs away and sends him to the floor with some big boots and a kick through the ropes. Ricochet tries to run away and Mark hauls him back to the apron and they trade shots there, until Mark sends him to the floor and drops an elbow on him. Back in, that gets two. Ric hides in the ropes and suckers him in for a cheapshot on the ropes to take over, and then tosses him out and dropkicks him into the railing as we take a break. Back with Ricochet in control with a cutter for two, but Briscoe teases a bulldog and then just smacks him on the bald head instead. Fisherman’s buster gets two off that. They trade cradles for two and Ricochet hits a brainbuster for two. Ricochet with a springboard attempt, but Briscoe catches him in a uranage for two. Ricochet escapes the Jay Driller, but Mark hits the death valley driver and sliding lariat to set up the froggy bow, which misses. So Ricochet necks him on the top rope and follows with a springboard 450 for two. Ricochet to the top, but Briscoe cuts him off and slugs him to the floor before following with a tope and back in with a lariat for two. Ricochet tries the pin in the corner using the ropes, but Briscoe kicks out at two and gets a surprise rollup for the pin at 14:20! A rare upset win on this show. Afterwards, sore loser Ricochet grabs the golden scissors, but Kevin Knight quickly makes the save and claims them for himself. ****

Stokely Hathaway joins us, introducing his new tag team: FTR. That’s a good fit. Stokely runs down all the crimes committed by other AEW wrestlers while FTR gets fined for threatening Tony Schiavone. HANGMAN PAGE DID NOTHING WRONG, though. Highlight here is one guy in the front row heckling everything Stokely says (“What are you, the Supreme Court?”). So Cash points out that they put guys like Copeland and Danny Garcia first and it got them NOWHERE, so it’s FTR first from now on. Then Dax calls the Rock N Roll Express into the ring and complains that fans weren’t cheering for THEM while taking passive-aggressive shots and noting that the Midnight Express were actually better. Well that’s just facts. But apparently Ricky Morton annoys Dax one time too many with his hogging of the mic and FTR delivers a well deserved spike piledriver. Morton had that one coming for disrespecting FTR like he did. The Paragon makes the save, setting up a Collision match.

The Young Bucks v. Kevin Knight & Mike Bailey

Despite his $100,000 windfall, Bailey still does not have shoes. Big brawl to start and the babyfaces clear the ring and follow with a stereo dive. Back in the ring for the double-team facebuster on Bailey and Nick moonsaults Knight on the floor as we take a break. Back with Bailey running wild with kicks on the Bucks and it’s hot tag Knight, who hits Matt with clotheslines and a standing splash for two. Man the way Knight just springs up and down with every move is amazing. Matt catches both babyfaces with the northern lights suplex, and the Bucks do the double stomp into powerbomb combo on Knight for two. It’s a SUPERKICK PARTY and everyone is out, and then Bailey does an incredible spinkick showdown with Matt for another double down. Matt slugs it out with Knight, but Kevin hits him with a dropkick and we get a chicken fight for another crazy spot before Knight hits Matt with a top rope rana and then dropkicks Nick off Bailey’s shoulder, into a backstabber for two. High Low on Nick and we get a springboard splash from Knight for two while Bailey moonsaults Matt outside. Knight with a frog splash on Nick for two after Bailey hits a 450 standing kneedrop. They fight on the floor and the Bucks manage to hit a Doomsday Device on Knight off the railing, and then Bailey tries a moonsault and gets caught. That sets up a TK Driver on the floor (“Who the hell is Uncle Dave?”), and back in the ring knight dodges the EVP Trigger and hits them with a double DDT to give the fans hope. But then Ricochet returns and trips Knight up, and the EVP Trigger finishes him at 14:30. This was INSANE. ****1/4

Meanwhile, Toni Storm announces an eliminator challenge for Collision, so Queen Aminata steps up.

The Hurt Syndicate joins us and they’re once again looking for challengers, but MJF shows up backstage and he’s still a douche. So this time Shelton is a thumbs up, BUT NOT BECAUSE OF THE BROADS, but Bobby is still hesitant, so Max offers up an apology for the first time in his life and even offers up his car. So they head back to the parking lot, as Bobby and Shelton check out the car, and then Bobby gives another thumbs down and drives off. I’m increasingly convinced that Bobby is going to ask for the Dynamite Diamond Ring as the ultimate show of faith from MJF in exchange for joining.

Meanwhile, Hangman Page is interrupted by MJF, and tells him to go get in his car and drive away. So MJF reminds him that he’s a career choker, and even if he makes it to the finals, he’s gonna fail.

Will Ospreay & Brody King v. Konosuke Takeshita & Josh Alexander

The heels double-team Ospreay and drop a double elbow on him to start. Ospreay misses a splash on Alexander and Josh goes for the anklelock and then drops a knee on him. Brody comes in and smashes everyone, even throwing Ospreay onto them. King beats on Alexander with chops in the corner and gets a bit too excited before hitting Ospreay with one as well, but the heels double-team Will in their corner and we take a break. Back with Will fighting them both off with a handspring kick and it’s back to Brody, who blasts Takeshita with a lariat. The heels bail and Brody hits them with a tope suicida and bodyblock into the railing. Back in, the babyfaces double-team Takeshita for two, but Takeshita hits Ospreay with the Blue Thunder bomb for two. Brody with a lariat on Alexander for two and the cannonball follows, but Lance Archer takes the ref and Ospreay gets rid of him. But then Alexander nails Ospreay to block a springboard, and the heels double-team Brody with elbows for two. So Takeshita hits the knee strike, and Alexander finishes him with a package piledriver at 13:00. Goddamn this show is nothing but bangers. ***3/4. Afterwards we get a beatdown from the Callis Family, and then Hangman tries to save, but EVIL ROPONGI VICE joins the fight and the heels stand tall.

Owen Hart Foundation tournament semi-final: Jamie Hayter v. Kris Statlander

It’s a MEAT MATCH to start as they slug it out, and Hayter gets a missile dropkick for two. Stat runs her into the corner and they fight on the apron, where Stat sweeps the leg and takes her to the floor before missing a moonsault. We take a break and return with them trading elbows, but Statlander gets a german suplex for two. Statlander with a dragon sleeper on the mat, but Hayter rolls her over for two and goes to a headscissors. Statlander slams out of that and jumps on her with double knees for two. They trade cradles and Kris powerbombs her and they’re both down. Statlander tries Staturday Night Fever and Hayter escapes that, so Stat goes up with a 450 and that gets two. They fight on the top and Hayter puts her down with a clothesline, and the Hayterade finishes at 11:15 to send her to the finals. And we get the staredown with Mercedes to end the show. ***1/2

Man, it’s like they were planning out the show this week and Tony just said “OK we’re gonna do the same thing again this time” and bob’s your uncle, there’s your show. Another hot show with a hot crowd.

Next week: I’m in VEGAS, BABY, so no rant until later in the week.