The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 01.22.25

The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 01.22.25

Live from Knoxville, TN

Your hosts are Excalibur, Tony Schiavone & Taz

Will Ospreay & Kenny Omega join Tony for a face to face to start. Will is glad that Kenny isn’t dead, which is a sentiment you just don’t hear enough of in this crazy times. But Kenny is still holding a grudge over the Tiger Driver and screwdriver to the head. So Kenny won’t even trust Ospreay, even if he apologizes, and then Don Callis interrupts before they get any further with their beef. So Kenny immediately attacks Don, and that results in the Callis family attacking Kenny, before a reluctant Ospreay decides to save. Kenny puts Takeshita on the floor with a dragon suplex and tries the dive, but Fletcher cuts him off with a superkick and they all brawl into the crowd. This takes us back to the concourse, as Ospreay and Omega brawl with the Murder Machines and the merch table gets wiped out by Archer. So then the babyfaces get it together and team up to suplex Archer through the table to get rid of him. Back to the arena and security tries to break it up, but Will and Kenny climb up to high places and do stereo moonsaults onto the Callis family to put their differences aside. So Kenny offers Will a chance to be his partner in Australia. “Now you can hit my music because I’m scared of heights”. Awesomely fun opening brawl that felt like the old days.

Meanwhile, Jon Moxley is pretty sure Pac is gonna finish off COPE’s neck tonight once and for all.

AEW World tag team title: Private Party v. The Hurt Syndicate

They’re messing with Private Party’s music again after getting “Shots” over as champions, as they enter to a more generic rap song and then do “Shots” when they get to the ring for some reason. PP double-teams Bobby to start, but Bobby smashes Zay and hits him with a corner clothesline to cut that off. Over to Shelton, and the champs hit him with Silly String and a senton bomb from Zay that gets two. The Syndicate heads to the floor and Private Party tries dives, but the Syndicate catches them and Zay gets chokeslammed through the announce desk. And we take a break. Back with Quen getting worked over in the ring while Zay makes his way back to the corner in pain, and Quen hits Shelton with an enzuigiri and brings Zay in with the hot tag. He tries to run wild despite crippling back pain and hits Benjamin with a flatliner into a 450 from Quen that gets two. Zay with a rollup on Lashley for two, but Bobby spears the shit out of him for two. Shelton suplexes Quen all over the ring and then Bobby chokeslams him, and Zay takes another awesome spear and gets pinned at 9:10 to make the Hurt Syndicate the tag team champions. Sometimes you just gonna put someone over and this was the time. I’m kinda reminded of the famous Midnight Express v. Road Warriors match in 1988 where the Midnights had won the tag team titles in an inspiring babyface run and then ran into the Warriors and got completely destroyed by a team of destiny. I hated that match at the time but I love it now. This one wasn’t quite as dramatic because Tony Khan is allergic to booking complete squashes for some reason, but it had that same pedigree to it and the Hurt Syndicate looked like giant stars in victory. **1/2

Meanwhile, we take a look at Mariah May’s rise to World title prominence. And then Toni meets up Harley Cameron and they speak some weird language to each other that I don’t recognize.

Meanwhile, Jeff Jarrett’s promo is interrupted by Karen, who wants him to stop going into the mud with MJF.

Jeff Jarrett joins us to a monster babyface pop, and drops a story about Jerry Lawler inspiring him, before challenging Jon Moxley to come out and talk. But this brings out Claudio instead to attack Jeff from behind. Claudio goes to leave, but Jeff challenges him to a match next week in Huntsville, with Jarrett earning a title match if he wins.

Swerve Strickland v. AR Fox

Swerve sends him to the floor for a moonsault, and tries the back elbow on the way into the ring, but Fox catches him with a kick on the way down. Swerve suplexes him and we take a break. Back with Swerve hitting a backbreaker that sends Fox to the floor, but AR moonsaults him off the post and to the floor. Back in with a springboard rana, but Swerve catches him in a powerslam. Swerve with the back elbow, but Ricochet comes in swinging the scissors, providing distraction for Fox while Nana chases Ricochet to the back. Fox gets two off that tries the 450, but it misses and Swerve tries the JML Driver, which Fox reverses for two. Swerve with the flatliner and Swerve Stomp to finish, however, at 5:40. **3/4. And then we cut to the back, where Ricochet is trying to murder Prince Nana with his scissors, but lets him live this time.

Meanwhile, Chris Jericho is tired of hearing Big Bill give learning moments and wants to know what he’s going to do about all the losing. So Bill is gonna find Powerhouse Hobbs on Collision and teach him a lesson.

MJF joins us and wants us all to know that Jeff Jarrett made a very bad choice messing with him. This brings out Hangman Page to squash a local geek in 10 seconds. But then he uses the Angel’s Wings on the guy, and Christopher Daniels interrupts the beating, wearing a neck brace from his retirement match on Collision. And he no longer wants to fight Page, but wishes him happiness and leaves.

Meanwhile, Mercedes Mone has a celebration interrupted by Harley Cameron, who wants to be the next to ride the Mone Train and makes her case via song. All title matches should be determined by that, I feel.

Jamie Hayter v. Julia Hart

I was kind of hoping we’d get some followup with Julia misting Harley Cameron last week, but sadly, no. Jamie takes Julia to the floor and runs her into the railing. Julia sweeps the leg in the ring and we take a break. Back with them fighting on the top rope and down with a superplex, but Hayter makes the comeback. Jamie with a german suplex and spinebuster for two. Jamie with a half crab, but Hart makes the ropes and then spins her into an Octopus. Hayter counters that into a backbreaker, but Julia pulls the hair and ends up on top for two. Crucifix gets two. But then Hayter gets the backbreaker and finishes with Hayterade at 9:14. Good TV match. ***. Afterwards, Jamie puts her over as a tough bitch, despite the lack of backup this week, and offers a tiebreaker match.

Meanwhile, Powerhouse Hobbs will be waiting for Big Bill in the Jacksonville parking lot.

Meanwhile, the House of Black is no longer following anyone but themselves.

COPE v. Pac

Really we needed Colt Cabana for the true dream trios team here. COPE takes him down and works the leg to start, and then takes Pac to the floor with a headscissors and drops him on the stairs facefirst. They fight on the floor and COPE drops him on the table, but Pac runs him into the post to injure the neck as we take a break. Back with Pac holding a chinlock and he suplexes COPE, but COPE comes back with the shotgun dropkick and they’re both down. Pac is up first with a flapjack, but COPE powerbombs him for two. These two seem so completely off the page and the crowd is dead, which doesn’t help them. COPE comes back with a lariat and follows with the Impaler, but Pac puts him in the Brutalizer and they kind of fall over to break it up. Pac hits a pair of kicks to the neck and follows with a german suplex, so the ref calls Pac off and checks the neck, at which point Pac puts him in the Brutalizer, but COPE slams out of it. Spear to the back sets up a regular spear but they’re both out again. And then COPE finishes with a TKO at 17:50. I don’t know if COPE was hurt again or what, but this one stunk up the joint something awful and just dragged on FOREVER. ½*. And then, speaking of dragging on forever, we cut to the back, where the Death Riders are murdering the Rock N Roll Express and FTR, leaving COPE alone as the heels head to the ring for, say it with me, another Death Rider beatdown to end the show. Jay White tries to save but of course he’s a complete geek too next to the awesome force of Jon Moxley, who never shows ass and never loses. I’m strugging to find any kind of point to the Death Riders now, as they just kind of meander along beating people up with no direction or purpose, snuffing the life out of any main event acts that challenge them. I mean, even among other AEW heel groups they look tired and washed. Just look at the Hurt Syndicate and how VIBRANT and excited they were to win the tag titles, while Moxley literally sticks the World title in a damn suitcase and the Trios titles are a complete afterthought. It’s been four months now, the storyline isn’t going anywhere, just switch the damn title and move on.

Anyway, the opening brawl was GREAT and the tag title match felt important and exciting, but the rest of the show kind of fell off a cliff for me after that and never really regained my full attention again. Not the fault of the Knoxville crowd, who did their best, but this wasn’t the best show for them.