The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 05.08.82
Last week: Ted Dibiase returns and beats North American champion Bob Roop in a non-title match to get some revenge! Also Skandor Akbar brings in this Hacksaw Jim Duggan guy as a mercenary, which surely means more trouble for Dibiase. Luckily he’ll soon be getting a “sanctified” title shot at Roop thanks to matchmaker Grizzly Smith.
Taped from Shreveport, LA
Your hosts are Boyd Pierce & Ted Dibiase
Dick Murdoch v. Larry Higgins
Murdoch continues doing this weird gimmick where he thinks he’s a Marine again. I’m pretty sure didn’t make Captain in the Redneck division of the Marines, either. Murdoch goes for the takedown and Higgins makes the ropes, so Murdoch rides him down and SHOOTS THE HALF for two. Higgins fights up, so Murdoch grinds him down again with a facelock and then drops the elbow for the pin at 2:24. Boyd Pierce and Ted Dibiase are a particularly dull combination on commentary and Murdoch was pretty subdued this week.
Bob Roop v. Buddy Landel
Roop actually has a new version of the North American title that I’ve never seen before, much smaller than the classic version. They trade hammerlocks on the mat, but Roop rams him into the turnbuckles to break free and then grinds on an armbar. Roop with a slam for two, but Buddy gets a rollup for two and hits him with a series of slams and an elbowdrop for two. But then Roop necks him on the top rope and hits him with a high knee for the pin at 4:40.
Mr. Olympia v. Kelly Wayne
I don’t know why Ken Wayne is going by “Kelly” here. Even the announcers call him “Kenny”. Olympia hits him with a series of backdrops and chases him to the floor, but Wayne gets some cheapshots to take over. Olympia quickly fires back with dropkicks and drops elbows on him, and then finishes with the sleeper at 2:50.
Ernie Ladd & Iron Mike Sharpe v. The One Man Gang & the Assassin
It’s a big brawl to start and Iron Mike bearhugs the Assassin while Ladd chases the Gang to the floor, and finally the ref gets control of the match again. So Sharpe goes right back to the bearhug and then Ladd comes in with a big boot on the Assassin and hits him with a series of two handed chokes before letting him tag out to the Gang. And Ladd immediately bearhugs the Gang and then beats up both heels in their own corner. “Ladd’s sure not taking anything from anyone today” notes Dibiase in an understatement. He slams Gang and runs him into Sharpe’s knee, and then goes back to bearhugging Assassin again, but Mike finally gets caught with a knee from the apron and the heels take over. Assassin gets a crab on him and Gang drops an elbow at the same time, and Dibiase is OUTRAGED. However, due to the rules of Mid-South, he can’t interfere. But finally he’s had enough and charges into the ring to make the save at 5:00, which is a DQ win for the heels and probably a huge $2500 fine for Dibiase. Breaking rules have CONSEQUENCES, dammit!
Louisiana Heavyweight title: Junkyard Dog v. Bruiser Bob Sweetan
Bob Roop takes Ted’s place on commentary, and Boyd is taking none of his crap and tells him to just comment on the match and don’t sit there promoting himself. Also, Bob would like to make clear that he would never run into a match like that Ted Dibiase did. Once again, our sex offender count for the show is at 2, and I guess 3 if we’re counting the mention of Grizzly Smith. JYD hiptosses Sweetan to send him to the floor, but Bob uses the clubbing forearms on the Dog to take over. Dog fights back with a headbutt and slugs away in the corner before going to a facelock. Sweetan works him over with that and pounds away, but Dog fights back with a shoulder block to put him on the floor. Sweetan gives him a shot from the apron and the ref gets bumped, but he goes up for an illegal move of some kind and Dog powerslams him off the top for the pin at 3:34 to retain.
Ron Cheatham v. Rick Ferrera
We’ve still got about 10 minutes of TV time left and 2 jobbers in there fighting in a “TV time remaining” match, so this might be rough. Cheatham works on a facelock, but Fererra suplexes out for two and then takes him down with a headscissors. Meanwhile Boyd goes on a rant about how other promotions have crappy main events that end in 5:00 or so, which is why Mid-South puts theirs earlier in the show with plenty of time. Not sure who they were throwing shade at with that one, since WWF rarely even had anything past jobber matches on their TV at this point. Ferrera wins with a small package at 3:00.
The Grappler & Hacksaw Jim Duggan v. Coco Samoa & Jesse Barr
Boyd Pierce has gone to the dressing room and talked some sense into Ted Dibiase, so Ted is back on commentary again. He notes that he might be fined, and although he’s not a “wealthy man”, he’ll pay it gladly. Man, can you imagine if he WAS wealthy? He could just do whatever he wanted with no consequences. Grappler trades takedowns with Barr to start, and Samoa comes in for a headscissor takedown out of a headstand in a nice move. Grappler beats on Barr in the corner and follows with a sunset flip, and over to Duggan for an Oklahoma Stampede. Barr manages to take Samoa in and he runs wild as it’s BREAKING LOOSE IN TULSA and everyone brawls, but the heels collide and WE’RE DESPERATELY OUT OF TIME for the week.
This was kind of a nothing happening show, sadly.