The SmarK Rant for WWF in MSG – 10.19.90

The SmarK Rant for WWF in MSG – 10.19.90

Originally written 09.13.25

Wrapping up my 1990 MSG project, which has certainly been up and down as a year.

Taped from Madison Square Garden, drawing only 9000.

Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon & Bobby Heenan

Shane Douglas v. The Brooklyn Brawler

Douglas spent much of the year playing Replacement Rocker with Shawn Michaels on the shelf and never really got anywhere on his own. They trade armdrag attempts to start and get nowhere, and then Shane takes him down and drops an elbow on him before going to the armbar himself.
So if Lombardi is the Brooklyn Brawler, does that mean Shane is the Pittsburgh Plunger? Fits with Bret’s opinions on that city. Brawler takes him down with a backbreaker and adds a slam to take over, and another backbreaker gets two. Brawler with a bearhug while Bobby notes that he’s still got Lombardi on retainer, for any assorted stooge-work that needs doing. Shane escapes the bearhug but tries a slam and Brawler falls on top for two before going back to the bearhug again. Shane escapes that again as the crowd turns on the match, but they collide for a double down. Brawler ends up on top for two, but he charges and misses, allowing Shane to make the comeback. O’Connor roll out of the corner finishes at 10:31. Shane still had that Dynamic Dude stink on him and it took another couple of years to shake it off. *1/2

Koko B. Ware v. The Warlord

Warlord takes forever getting all his complicated ring gear off, and after all that he’s just a bald guy with a goatee in black trunks and boots. No wonder he never got over. Warlord runs him into the corner and flexes a bunch, but Koko fights back with a double axehandle for two. But then Warlord slooooooooooooooows it down again, beating on the back with the clubbing forearms while Bobby leaves for the dressing room, and we get another bearhug segment for the second match in a row. Koko briefly escapes but Warlord cuts him off and stunguns him for the pin at 8:16. Koko got absolutely nothing for the entire match. DUD

Intercontinental title: The Texas Tornado v. Mr. Perfect

Lord Alfred Hayes joins us on commentary and declares that Perfect was ENRAGED in the dressing room, kicking over and tables and chairs. I bet if they were on an airplane he’d try to kick the door open, too! And indeed, Perfect immediately attacks Kerry on the apron and takes him to the floor for a beating out there. But Kerry fires up and hits the tornado punch on the floor, knocking Perfect silly. Back in the ring, Kerry tosses him over the top again and Perfect takes his first crazy bump, and Tornado works the arm in the ring. Tornado with the sleeper, but Perfect takes him down for the necksnap to escape. Really, Kerry should have gone with way more tornado-related moves in the ring, like airplane spins (“The Eye of the Storm”) or a Giant Swing (“The Texas Twister”). They slug it out and the ref gets bumped, with MUSTARD, and Perfect puts Kerry down with an Axe Attack. AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA SEE A PERFECTPLEX, but there’s no ref. Perfect exposes the steel turnbuckle and runs him into that, but that referee is still unconscious. To be fair he took three corner clotheslines. But he finally revives for a two count, at which point Tornado suddenly pops up and hits a pair of tornado punches, sending Perfect bumping over the top rope for a brawl on the floor and double countout at 7:45. I have no idea why they bothered protecting Kerry like that. He was dropping it back right away and plummeting back down the card. Match had good heat but they didn’t have great chemistry and the match was really short. **. They did have a rematch the next month, but it wasn’t much better.

SD Jones v. Iron Mike Sharpe

Come on, man. Is this the best they can come up with? They trade shots and Mike ends up tied in the ropes as per usual and Jones pulls him off the ropes. Mike offers a handshake of peace, but SD attacks him in the corner and then misses a blind charge, allowing Sharpe to go RIGHT IN THE BREAD BASKET to take over. Sharpe works the arm while Gorilla and Bobby have this whole pointless conversation about how Tornado and Perfect are so incredibly upset in their different dressing rooms. I guess we’ll need a special referee for next month’s rematch, someone a bit more ROWDY. Jones with a slam for two as this drags on. Headbutt gets two. Sharpe loads up his forearm pad and knocks Jones out for the pin at 11:00. A complete drag. DUD

Rhythm & Blues join us for a treat, in this case a live performance of “Hunka Hunka Honky Love” complete with incredibly convincing guitar playing from Greg Valentine.

Dusty Rhodes v. Ted Dibiase

Really, “Million Dollar Man v. Common Man” is a brilliantly simple feud but Dusty was beyond checked out by this point and the feud was overly complicated by the Sapphire turn. Like it was the worst kept secret in wrestling by this point that Dusty was done with Vince McMahon and returning to book WCW, and the polka dots were now gone. Dusty cleans house with elbows and sends Dibiase and Virgil running. Back in, Dusty absorbs some chops and hits Ted with elbows, and then heads to the floor to deal with Virgil before falling prey to a sneak attack from Dibiase. It’s kind of interesting that Vince got everything he wanted – finally getting Dusty Rhodes, Ric Flair, and the Road Warriors – and arguably only used Dusty in the proper way. Oh shit I just realized I did a list of three AND em dashes there. Sorry, I’m not ChatGPT, promise. Dusty fights him off and gets a small package for two, but Dibiase takes him down with a chinlock. Dream fights out and makes the comeback with elbows in the corner, sending Dibiase to the floor. Dibiase grabs the bell and that’s a DQ at 9:08 because Dusty used it first. And the heels double-team him and knock him out cold with the bell, leaving him laying. Very paint-by-numbers stuff. *1/2

The British Bulldog v. Haku

At the time this was a very interesting return for Davey Boy, because he had never been a heavyweight singles guy before, outside of his Stampede run at the end of the promotion. Haku with a headlock, but Davey escapes and dropkicks him to the floor. Back in, Davey with a sleeper and he takes Haku down and works the arm, bending his arm with a wristlock and then stomping it. Haku blocks a monkey flip with an atomic drop to take over, and headbutts Davey into the corner before putting the metaphorical boots to him. Davey comes back with a bodypress for two and crucifix for two. Haku with a vicious piledriver for two and a knee to the gut gets two. Davey bails to the floor to recover, but comes back in and takes a mammoth backdrop for two. Haku does a hair-assisted camel clutch to be a dick and beats Davey down with chops as well. Haku with the sleeper and Smith runs him into the corner to break, but Haku whips him into the corner and Davey takes a flipping bump off that, which gets two. Davey bails again and Bobby gets a quick cheapshot out there. Back in the ring, Davey hits a back suplex, as Haku nearly folds over, and Davey gets two off that. Collision for a double down and that gets two for the Bulldog. Davey actually takes him over with a Sharpshooter, but Haku quickly makes the ropes and catches Davey with a kick to put him down again. Haku with a pair of headbutts and he chops Davey down, and then this a shoulderbreaker for two. Haku misses a dropkick and Davey fires up, returning the giant backdrop from earlier. Delayed suplex gets two. Haku misses a charge, and Davey debuts the running powerslam and puts him away at 19:35 to a HUGE pop. Home run debut for Davey, as he quickly became a solid midcard player and replacement for Rick Rude in that utility slot, and big draw for Europe. Easily the best match of the night, as they knew and trusted each other and just went out and bumped for each other. That being said, Davey quickly shifted to a more generic power style, but this was a really interesting first match back. ***3/4.

Dino Bravo v. Tugboat

Dino attacks at the bell, but Tugboat clotheslines him down and Bravo bails to the floor. Back in, we get the test of strength and trade elbowdrops, but Bravo gets an atomic drop for two. Bravo with a chinlock as he puts Tugboat to sleep along with the entire audience. “Got a lot of toots coming out of this crowd here” notes Gorilla. Must be all the hot dogs. Bravo gets a fairly impressive slam for two and sends Tugboat to the floor, but then he won’t let Tug back into the ring and the ref calls for the bell at 8:34. What a lame fucking finish to a terrible match. -*

WWF tag team title: The Hart Foundation v. Rhythm & Blues

Valentine misses a charge on Bret and hits the post, and the Harts double-team him in their corner, but Honky trips up Neidhart to take over. They trade shots in the corner and the heels cut off the ring as they’re rushing through this thing and probably approaching curfew in MSG. Hammer and Anvil slug it out and Bret gets the hot tag and rolls up Honky for two a couple of times. Bret with the middle rope elbow for two and it’s BONZO GONZO, at which point Greg grabs the guitar, hits Honky for mistake, and puts Bret on top for the pin at 6:00 to retain. And that’s Honky’s final MSG match. ½*

Davey Boy v. Haku was GREAT and clearly the highlight of this show, but the rest was guys sleepwalking through it. 1990 was just such a dead year outside of the Hogan-Quake feud.