The SmarK Rant for NWA Worldwide – 01.25.86

The SmarK Rant for NWA Worldwide – 01.25.86

Originally written 01.17.26

Taped from Shelby, NC on 01.21.86 I think?

Your hosts are Tony Schiavone & David Crockett

We get a montage of Ronnie Garvin’s most awesome Hands of Stone finishes before the show, which I’m assuming is building up to his challenge of Ric Flair on Superstars on the Superstation. The one with George South trying a monkey flip and getting his lights punched out lives rent free in my head.

Baby Doll joins us to start, because Dusty Rhodes is busy attending a parade in Texas. Was he being used as one of the giant balloons?

Jimmy Valiant v. Vern Deaton

Jimmy tosses him immediately and drops an elbow on him for the pin at 0:30. He really wants Tully Blanchard apparently!

The Rock N Roll Express join us and Ricky Morton is back to talking again after taking the racket to the throat a few weeks back. And he would like to once again stress that Rock and Roll is here to say.

Meanwhile, Tony Schiavone chats with Dusty Rhodes’ doctor, Joseph Estwanik, who has obviously never heard about patient confidentiality and reveals that Dusty’s leg is fully healed and doesn’t need the bionic boot any longer.

Arn Anderson offers his rebuttal and notes that obviously Dusty was never injured in the first place and has just been using the boot as a weapon.

Baron Von Raschke v. Patrick Tanaka

The Baron elbows Tanaka down and runs him into the corner for a kneelift where Tanaka was doing ALL of the work. Like Baron literally just lifted his leg slightly and Tanaka had to bump off it and sell it dramatically. And the CLAWHOLD finishes at 1:40 and that is all the people need to know. Tanaka was such a good worker because Baron was immobile and Pat did it all here.

Paul Jones and his team of Baron & Barbarian (Bar-Baron?) offers a $10,000 challenge to any wrestler who wants to compete with the Ballbearing in a 500 pound bench press or an arm wrestling contest. Also Jones has given Baron to the Russians to replace the injured Krusher. I think that’s how they got the Six-Man titles off them, in fact.

Black Bart v. George South

Bart beats on him in the corner and brings him out with a suplex and backdrop before dropping him on the top rope and slugging him down. Bart works on the arm and puts him down with a backbreaker. Bart slams him and goes up with a fistdrop before punching him down again and then putting him in an armbar and dropping a leg on the arm as well. And then he goes up and finishes with the Texas Compactor legdrop at 4:48. Replay shows that he literally didn’t even touch South with that one.

Ron Bass joins David and he’s happy to take $10,000 from Paul Jones but he wants more rules defined first.

The Barbarian v. The Italian Stallion

Barbarian slowly works the Stallion over while Baron joins us on commentary, but Stallion comes back with some shots in the corner before trying a bodypress and getting slammed. Barbarian with a press slam and a powerslam, and the diving headbutt finishes at 3:30.

Tully Blanchard joins David and JJ thinks that Jimmy Valiant must have been dropped on his head if he thinks he can beat Tully in a taped fists match.

Ronnie Garvin & Manny Fernandez v. Jim & Mack Jeffers

Fernandz throws the Jeffers around with armdrags and Garvin punches him down to set up a Fernandez dropkick. Manny hits Jim with another armdrag and works that, but it’s over to Garvin and the Jeffers work on his arm. This sets up an absolutely amazing comedy spot I’ve never seen before: Jim brings Garvin to the corner and Mack yanks on the arm from the apron with his back turned to the ring, but then Garvin slips out and feeds Jim’s arm to Mack, who just keeps yanking on the arm with evil glee, so that the wrong guy was getting his arm pulled by his own partner! The crowd went absolutely batshit for that one and I don’t know why no one ever used it again that I can remember. Sometimes wrestling is just the best for silly little things like that where you can pop an entire arena without doing anything dangerous. Garvin knocks out a Jeffer and pins him at 3:50.

The Midnight Express joins David and Bobby has a rare shoulder strap look this week. But then Cornette talks so long that they get cut off by the commercial break, so he keeps going when the break is over and refuses to leave until he’s done slandering the Rock and Rock Express this time.

The Rock N Roll Express v. Thunderfoot & Tony Zane

The RNR double-team Thunderfoot in the corner, but Ricky briefly gets caught in the corner and beaten down by Zane. But then the champs regroup and finish him with the double dropkick at 1:50.

Tully Blanchard & Arn Anderson v. Rocky King & Pez Whatley

Baby Doll joins us on commentary, naming the Four Horsemen for the first time I can recall on one of these shows. JJ interrupts and we get a split screen of Baby Doll cutting a promo on JJ while Arn works on Rocky’s arm. Oh hey, I forgot about Rocky King in my list of potential Flintstones crossover last week! JJ notes that he could get a whole bunch of women like Baby Doll just by using a pocket full of quarters and notes that Dusty isn’t here to save her this week, so Jimmy Valiant rushes in and sends JJ running, pledging to protect her when Dusty can’t. Back in the ring, Pez makes a comeback on Tully with a headbutt, but Arn stomps him down. Back to Tully, but Pez whips him into the corner and Tully bumps over the top and claims that he was thrown out, and that gets him nowhere with the ref. Over to King, but Tully immediately cuts him off and they double-team him with an awesome elevated gourdbuster at 4:30 to finish. That was BADASS. This Tully & Arn team is pretty good, they should team together more often.

And we finish with Baron Von Raschke, as Paul Jones notes that Ron Bass is already a loser in the $10,000 challenge because there’s no chance he’s stronger than the Ballbearing, and THAT IS ALL THE PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW.

Some good stuff this week, although Ronnie Garvin desperately needs a haircut.