The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 07.03.82

The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 07.03.82

Taped from Shreveport, LA

Your hosts are Boyd Pierce & Cowboy Bill Watts

LAST WEEK: JYD suffered the rare double screwjob at the hands of Ted Dibiase, as he dropped his newly won North American title to Dibiase and was also forced to vacate the Louisiana title without a chance to regain it in a tournament. On the bright side, Dog is still half of the tag team champions with Mr. Olympia so he’s got that going on.

Jesse Barr & Iron Mike Sharpe v. Doug Vines & Jeff Sword

Barr and Sharpe would be a formidable opening match jobber team on a WWF house show if this was 4 years later. They work Sword over in the corner to start and Barr controls with an armbar, but Vines comes in and the heel team manages to double-team Barr in their corner and Vines works on his back and gets two. Barr reverses a suplex and brings Iron Mike back in and he slams the crap out of Vines and Sword before quickly finishing with the body vice at 3:49. Decent little tag match for what it was.

Cowboy Bill Watts rants about backseat drivers and Monday Morning quarterbacks, but he does concede that in this case, Bob Roop might have been right about Ted Dibiase’s loaded glove all along. So we take you back to last week, as Dibiase gives an offended promo before the match where he denies ever using his glove as a weapon against anyone and calls Roop a lying liar who lies. So we join the ending of the title match, with JYD defending against Dibiase and bumping him to the floor off a figure-four attempt. So Dog checks on his friend and helps him back in the ring, but Dibiase loads up the glove and knocks his friend out to win the title.

Ted Dibiase v. Tom Jones

This is a non-title match. OK let’s all get it out of our system by the end of this match because we know it’s coming. Dibiase takes him down and works the arm, but Jones comes back with a dropkick and slam for two. Watts thinks it would be a big upset, but it’s not unusual for that to happen. Dibiase beats on him on the ropes, firmly establishing that he’s the heel now, and puts Jones down with a back elbow, but Jones comes back with a headbutt and Dibiase is staggered. So he goes into the tights, possibly to throw some panties at Jones, but instead he loads up the glove and knocks him cold, and then finishes with a piledriver at 3:54 for good measure. Sadly Jones never got a chance to unleash his devasting finisher, the Sexbomb. Also Dibiase instantly got the heel mannerisms and had a great sneer for the crowd after his win here.

#1 Contender match: Bob Roop v. Junkyard Dog

Winner of this one gets their rematch with Dibiase for the Superdome show coming up. These days they’d just do a three-way match to be lazy, but back in 1982 men were men and bookers were bookers. Dog is super pissed and beats Roop’s ass all the way to the floor and then back in for a lariat. Roop fights back and Dog is ignoring the pain as if amped up on some kind of illegal substance, and he wallops Roop and then blocks a hiptoss as well and gets his own. He continues whooping Roop and then delivers a THUMP for the complete squash win at 1:31. Well sucks to be Roop there.

Mississippi title: Mr. Olympia v. The Grappler

Olympia takes Grappler down with a headlock as now the announcers are questioning if Dog should be wary of Olympia too. Really though, how much can you trust ANY masked man? However as far as I know, Olympia never turned on the Dog, so he can rest easy about that. Grappler controls with a bodylock on the mat and goes for the mask, but Olympia comes back with a dropkick and he also goes after the mask, but the ref tells them to knock off that tomfoolery. Olympia misses a crossbody and Grappler loads up the boot, but the kick misses and Olympia gets the sleeper and then rolls him up for the pin at 5:10 to retain. Fun little match. OK, so here’s some wrestling weirdness that has always kind of fascinated me. Len Denton was the Grappler, and later in the year (mild spoiler) he adds Grappler #2 as a partner, who was played by Tony Anthony from Mid-Atlantic. So they’re a team for a while, and then they get unmasked at some point and return to Mid-South a couple of years later repackaged as the Dirty White Boys, Len Denton & Tony Anthony. But then they split up and go their own way as singles after that, and Anthony retains the gimmick as Dirty White Boy Tony Anthony, giving us effectively a gimmick transfer between the two guys. I dunno, I just think wrestling is neat sometimes.

Killer Khan v. Ernie Ladd

Oh this is quite the TV match! Why do they put “Big” in quotation marks for Ladd’s graphic? Clearly the man is big, it’s not like an ironic designation. Ladd gives him the ol’ hamhocks in the corner and Khan runs away from that, wisely, before taking over with the Mongolian chops. Ladd slugs back and gets a bearhug and uses a leg choke on the ropes while the announcers discuss the size of Ladd’s boots. Watts sagely notes that once you get past size 17, it really doesn’t make any difference at that point. Khan comes back with his own choking and Watts discusses the scientific technique of Mongolian screaming, as it apparently “tightens the abdominal muscles” while you’re delivering blows and thus makes them more painful. I don’t even know if that’s true but this is a man who clearly believes in the bullshit he’s spewing and god bless him for it. Akbar puts a chair up in the corner while the ref gets bumped, but Ladd whips Khan into it and then beats on Akbar himself. So Khan grabs the chair while Ladd’s back is turned and knocks him out with a chair shot, and then adds the flying knee for good measure and pins him at 4:12. Man if they’re building up Khan for a rematch with Andre the Giant in Mid-South, they are doing yeoman’s work with it. Kudos.

Actually, duh, I bet they had a match at the Superdome show coming up later in the month.

Buck Robley v. Hangman Harris

Poor Rick Harris has already kind of hit the ceiling in Mid-South with this character. It feels more like a World Class gimmick anyway and I think he had better success there as Black Bart. Harris works the arm and they slug it out, which Harris wins, and a neckbreaker gets two. Harris with the hangman submission, but Robley flips out of it and uses the arm brace to knock out Harris for the pin at 4:11. Wait so when Dibiase uses a loaded glove he’s a bad guy, but Robley literally hits a guy with an ARM CAST and he’s the babyface? I call shenanigans.

Hacksaw Duggan v. Frank Monte

We get clips from Houston TV, as Duggan was Akbar’s hired gun when he was introduced a few weeks back, but now he’s been repackaged as more of a freelance brawling heel. Duggan controls with a shoulderbreaker, but Monte makes a comeback before trying a bodypress and getting caught by Duggan with an Oklahoma Stampede to finish. Interesting that the style Duggan was using here is basically what Dr. Death turned into a couple of years after this.

Man I wish I could have watched this show when I was a kid. I probably would have become a college football star and learned to ride motorcycles at age 10 while drinking whiskey and smoking two packs a day. AMERICAN MADE motorcycles, dammit. And AMERICAN cigarettes.