Minus-Star Match Reviews: The Undertaker vs. Muhammad Hassan – WWE Great American Bash 2005

Few moments in recent WWE history have served as much of a “what-if” as the Muhammad Hassan character. He was a lightning rod for controversy and commentary. He was pushed to the moon and pissed off an entire locker room in the process. He was rubbing shoulders with legends including Jerry Lawler and Hulk Hogan. It seemed like he was well on his way to becoming Vince McMahon’s most cherished shiny new toy…only for something completely outside of WWE’s control to screw everything up in a level no one thought possible…and gave The Undertaker’s career another black mark in the process.

The Story

Muhammad Hassan debuted in December 2004 and was an instant heat magnet. Even though he was portraying a wrestler of Jordanian/Palestinian descent he was described as “Arab-American”. It was a rough time for such a character given that the US was still living in the shadow of the 9/11 terrorist attacks and American patriotism was running high. Initially the character was meant to protest the blanket mistreatment of those like him in America and hoped that his success in WWE would serve to fight against growing prejudice against Arab Americans. But it wasn’t long before the character changed a bit, adding prayer gestures to his entrances that really pissed off many people. He was so hated that when he entered the 2005 Royal Rumble match, everyone in the ring before him, babyfaces and heels alike, all teamed up to eliminate him as quickly as possible. On paper this was tremendous heat: who else was so loathed that other heels became babyfaces by comparison? It also helped that WWE’s resident musical wizard Jim Johnston managed to create a great theme for the guy that wasn’t just gimmick appropriate, but it sounded good AND helped him get the desired reaction instantaneously.

Come spring/summer 2005 Hassan had already had segments with legends, veterans, and champions, even facing new WWE Champion John Cena in a losing effort for the title. However, Hassan’s heat extended to the WWE locker room. Reports emerged that many people were jealous of his meteoric push and association with big names (he even had a segment with Stone Cold Steve Austin at one point). Then it was alleged that his backstage heat worsened when he disrespected Eddie Guerrero by using the Camel Clutch as his new finisher without asking Guerrero’s permission, since Guerrero’s father Gory was the one who invented that move decades earlier. At one point Hassan was said to try to smooth things over smooth things over by buying shots for the whole locker room after a show, only for everyone to pour those shots out. Man, guy couldn’t catch a break.

Then, shit hit the fan.

In late June 2005 Hassan was drafted to SmackDown and soon found himself in a program with The Undertaker. Because of course he did, Undertaker was the ultimate gatekeeper who tested every newcomer on the block to see if they stood a chance at headlining long-term. Then on the first week of July WWE booked an angle in which Hassan knelt down on his knees and prayed, at which point several masked men wearing camo pants and balaclavas ambushed Undertaker and choked him out with piano wire, and then Hassan put ‘Taker in the Camel Clutch. Once again, massive heat. These events took placed on a taped episode of SmackDown to be broadcast globally three days later. Little did anyone know that, on July 7^th, terrorists bombed four locations in London, UK, killing 52 people and injuring almost 800 others. The 7/7 Bombings were the deadliest terrorist attack since 1988 and left British society understandably shaken…and thus in no mood to see WWE showcase a storyline invoking those same undertones. Sure enough WWE pulled the taped episode from international broadcast; however it aired unedited in the United States and in Canada.

Unsurprisingly, this angle made national headlines for all the wrong reasons. It was in extremely poor taste; even if the 7/7 Bombings had never happened, the specific imagery surrounding this angle was pushing the envelope far beyond what the character’s presentation. Hassan later cut a promo reiterating that he himself was no terrorist and that Americans were completely in the wrong to presume he was. However, UPN pressured WWE further and further in objection to the Hassan character until he was completely pulled from television broadcast. No amount of apologizing would be enough for this broadcaster to allow the character to appear on their network. As such, the character never appeared on TV again. But that wasn’t enough; Muhammad Hassan had to be removed from WWE completely. In other words, WWE had to kill the character off in a way that would be at least somewhat believable. And so WWE went ahead with a planned Undertaker/Hassan match at The Great American Bash (a show that just oozed irony), with a newly added (and thinly justified) stipulation that if Hassan lost he’d never show his face again.

The Match

This took place on July 24, 2005. It was rated ¾* out of five by the Wrestling Observer’s Dave Meltzer.

Hassan comes out first carried to the ring on a litter by those same masked men as before. There are some interesting signs in the crowd saying things like “Hassan was screwed” and “UPN Fears Muhammad”. Then ‘Taker makes his usual entrance and gets his typical pop.

Hassan tries avoiding ‘Taker and lands some corner punches but then ‘Taker fires back with a strike barrage. Big boot by Undertaker followed by Old School for two. Daivari pulls Hassan out of a corner to avoid a corner boot and then distracts the ref so that the masked guys can attack ‘Taker. Some more light offense by Hassan and another distract the referee spot so that another goon can choke the Deadman. Hassan lands a DDT for two and ‘Taker does the zombie sit-up right away. A “U-S-A” chant begins as ‘Taker fights out of a chinlock. ‘Taker no-sells a kick and then a punch exchange ends abruptly as Hassan’s legs give out. ‘Taker goes after the masked guys at ringside when one of them chokes him with piano wire as Daivari distracts the referee AGAIN. Hassan goes for the Camel Clutch but ‘Taker escapes via electric chair. ‘Taker does his full superstar comeback sequence and destroys a few of the goons along the way. Hassan escapes a Tombstone but can’t avoid a Chokeslam which gets…three? Really? Undertaker wins with a chokeslam? When was the last time that happened?

Winner after 8:04: The Undertaker

Post-match the goons all rush in to attack Undertaker but he goes berserk and destroys each and every one of them. One guy eats a chair guillotine, another gets chokeslammed ringside, another gets Tombstoned, and Daivari gets thrown from the ring to the floor and then smashed through the announce table. Meanwhile Hassan has crawled up the entrance ramp to the stage only to find the Deadman right behind him. Undertaker does a bad-looking chokeslam onto the steel stage and then opens it up one of the steel panels, revealing the concrete floor below. Then he basically commits attempted murder with a Last Ride powerbomb through the stage to the floor. A thud can be heard upon impact. Undertaker poses for the crowd and then the camera shows Hassan lying on the floor below, breathing but unconscious. Michael Cole & Tazz switch to “serious voices” for a moment as the show segues immediately to…Torrie Wilson. And that’s the end of Muhammad Hassan’s short but notable WWE career.

Review

This was weird. Very, very weird. The more you look at the facts the more it becomes clear that Hassan’s WWE career was terminated prematurely due to pressure from a single network which, ironically, ceased operation only a year later. Yes the angle was in extremely poor taste; no one’s arguing that. But it’s not like Mark Copani, the man behind the character, couldn’t disappear from TV for a few months and be repackaged if necessary. But no, UPN led a crusade demanding Hassan’s head and so the character was axed. In later years a rumor emerged that Hassan was originally booked to beat Undertaker here and then beat Batista in Washington, DC, to become the youngest-ever World Heavyweight Champion. I don’t know if he’d be a long-term character, though: given his gimmick then maybe he’d last another two or three years and then…what? Be repackaged anyway? The character was very much a product of its time, never meant to be a long-term investment for WWE. That said, they killed the gimmick way too soon, though maybe that was for the better since Hassan really didn’t look good in this match.

Even if this was meant to be his final appearance he didn’t leave much of a positive impression between the bells. I get it; he was young, green, under immense pressure, and said to be loathed by his peers. But the match itself was boring, full of Hogan-style smoke-and-mirrors and monster-of-the-week handicaps without the larger-than-life personalities to compensate for a lack of drama or tension. It was basically an extended squash yet the sight of Hassan and his goons didn’t get that much of a babyface pop. Sure the fans booed when the goons ran interference and at the end when Undertaker got the pinfall. But for most of that eight minutes the crowd was dead and the action heatless and lacking in visible passion. It was a TV match, or worse, a dark match, broadcast on Pay-Per-View, meaning that those who paid for this show were given substantially less value for their dollars.

Final Rating: DUD

This was a heatless end to a molten-hot character that could’ve taken SmackDown in a wildly different direction at a time when that brand was in desperate need of bigger stars. Muhammad Hassan was the victim of circumstances way beyond his control: saddled with a gimmick he had to portray, given material he couldn’t really refuse, and put in a damned-if-you-do-damned-if-you-don’t position that saw each and every one of his actions and choices scrutinized and criticized. For a man still in his mid-twenties he did the best he could, but even with Undertaker basically leading the match he wasn’t in a position to put on anything resembling a good performance knowing he was being swept under the rug and booted out the door.

But at least WWE learned their lessons and stopped running tasteless angles that take advantage of tragedies and real-world controversies, right? Right?

Thanks for reading.