Joshi Spotlight: The Queen of Villains & The Crush Gals in 1986 WWF

Is anyone ready for some shamelessly topical pandering!? I am!!

So WWE’s YouTube channel just released a bunch of content of Japanese girls hitting the WWF in the 1980s, in response to the Queen of Villains series that was just released to Netflix! This features the American tour of the Crush Gals (Chigusa Nagayo & Lioness Asuka) and their rivals Dump Matsumoto & Bull Nakano! Near as I can tell, the two teams didn’t interact, fighting only American rivals. This generally meant that someone had to act as a cheating heel. On commentary throughout is Gorilla Monsoon, who is only vaguely prepared for what he’s about to watch- he has the names of “Chigooza” and “AhSOOKa” mixed up throughout, often changing halfway through the match and isn’t corrected. One of the funnier bits is he always thinks a slam is going to be a suplex because in joshi puro they always do a front-facelock to set up a bodyslam instead of the crotch-scoop.

All four girls were of course MASSIVE stars in Japan at this point, with Chigusa being a household name and a goddess to her schoolgirl fanbase. None of which applies to the U.S. audience, so it’s interesting to see how the Gals get over- usually it’s via the heels cheating to put over the comebacks, and some natural selling from the Gals. The style of Dump & Bull was so mayhem-related, with tons of weapons and open cheating, and that can’t be done in the U.S. style which has more stringent rules- so they’re left with regular-ass selling instead of bleeding and acting near-death. Thankfully in almost every match is a woman trained in Zenjo (AJW’s nickname- ZEN Nihon JOshi Puroresu)- both Judy Martin & Leilani Kai did LONG tours there and know the style (note that when the Jumping Bomb Angels did their famous tour in the WWF, they were almost never paired up with anyone BUT the Glamour Girls, who were the only ones who could take their state-of-the-art flying offense).

All of these matches seem to be around the same couple of dates- in fact, they ran a Crush Gals match and a Dump/Bull match on each card! That’s quite a lot of show real estate to use on total unknowns who aren’t going to be coming back, either.

This is actually missing one match, so I’ll post that one first:

THE DEVILS OF JAPAN (Dump Matsumoto & Bull Nakano) vs. VELVET McINTYRE & DAWN MARIE:
(WWF, March 8th 1986)
* WHAT THE SHIT?!?! DUMP MATSUMOTO and BULL NAKANO made WWF TV in the late ’80s? This is friggin’ crazy. Dump is swinging around a chain and dressed like a dark samurai, while Bull has her hair in its mid-80s phase, blonde and shaved on one side, which is hilariously prescient to the hairstyle that became super common among women about ten years ago. They look like a Japanese, female version of Demolition or the Road Warriors, and I’m amazed somebody didn’t try to push them over here. Lord Alfred is agog (“That is a big UGLY lady!”) when Dump takes off the samurai helmet. The barefoot McIntyre had traded the WWF Women’s Title with Moolah in ’86 (and had a SPECTACULARLY bad match at WrestleMania 2). Dawn Marie (not that one) is a Moolah-style woman who was largely a JTTS. Velvet’s in white, and Dawn Marie’s in pink/purple.

Monsoon & Lord Alfred Hayes are just flabbergasted by the looks of Bull & Dump, Gorilla bringing up having seen beautiful girls during his tours of Japan, but “neither of these ladies resembles that remark”. Dump is of course snarling and growling at the crowd already, while an 18-year-old Bull is taller, yet subordinate. Both guys are aghast that Velvet would go barefoot (apparently for the first time), thinking that’s dangerous but theorize it might be for additional foot-speed (“or she just forgot her boots”). Bull sells the arm for a bit, but Dump comes in and immediately no-sells everything (LITERALLY brushing off Velvet’s dropkick), doing what Gorilla calls a “Japanese salute” to the crowd (ie. the “up yours” sign), and the “Devils of Japan” trash the faces for several minutes, which the crowd doesn’t really appreciate. Velvet gets whipped around by her hair as Alfred suggests Dump’s vital statistics are “56-56-56 by the looks of it”, then chomps away at Velvet until a leapfrog & crossbody puts her down for two. A couple guys bellow out “BORINGGGGG!”, and it’s a lot of simple brawling and “running body attack” stuff, with Dump posing a lot and the commentators making a bunch of fat and ugly jokes at their expense (“Bull looks like she hasn’t missed too many bowls of rice”). Dump gets a big lariat on Dawn, though. Velvet does a bit of stuff (Dump seemingly unsure how to sell the strikes), gets run over by Bull, but manages to hit a Victory Roll out of the corner for a shocking three count (8:04)! The Devils specialized in mayhem more than ’80s-style “thumping” stuff.

Rating: *1/2 (Not a great match, and it was more or less a Jobber Squash until Velvet suddenly won, as the middle seven minutes was all the Joshi girls)

THE DEVILS OF JAPAN (Dump Matsumoto & Bull Nakano) vs. VELVET McINTYRE & LINDA GONZALEZ:
(WWF, March 16th 1986)
* This one is JIP as Dump & Bull head out and take on Velvet & Linda. This has Monsoon & Ventura on commentary. Velvet’s in pink and is barefoot as usual, and Linda is in blue.

Bull is whipping Velvet around by the hair as Monsoon notes with disgust “the referee isn’t even doing anything, Jess”, then starts dunking on him for not even making a count when the heels start openly double-teaming, then Dump wows the crowd with a Banzai Drop of all things! We get a failed tag in an odd spot (you don’t often see the hands MISS in mid-air) and we get some false tags that the ref doesn’t see as Jesse puts over how “they’ve got great tag team psychology in there”, though Monsoon notes it’s not hard to have that when the referee doesn’t know what he’s doing. Gorilla & Jess are doing this very casual “normal guy” conversational style and it’s really different. “If it sounds like I’m on Gilberto’s case, it’s because I am” “WHY?- he’s doing the best job he can- he’s got four bodies in there and these Japanese girls are very good at hiding what they’re doing”. Velvet takes a good bump off a double-clothesline as Monsoon is ALL OVER Gilberto for not doing shit (“This is a handicap match? Look at him- he’s just walking around like a GOOF. He hasn’t YET tried to put one of them out!” “Well maybe he’s afraid of them” “Well, maybe he is- should have his license revoked”).

Velvet gets her arm destroyed, then tries a cross-body on both but gets caught and slammed. She finally gets a one-foot dropkick on Bull, who is immediately shocked and looking around confused. Linda comes in with two dropkicks, then Velvet runs in… and Linda gets in her way and goes for a pin so Velvet just leaves, haha. Monsoon keeps calling them “The Bull” and “The Dump” as Bull gets double-dropkicked and makes the tag, but Dump eats a dropkick and bails, so Velvet just drags Bull in and Linda tries to pin her (lol Gilberto is even counting pins like she’s legal). Dump/Linda go again, and Linda for some reason tries to duck a lariat but just eats it on the top of the head and collapses, so Dump hits another then hits an airplane spin for a couple slow revolutions, and Monsoon hilariously adds “Kinda slow- wouldn’t wanna take off on THAT flight” which immediately cracks up Jesse (“HAH!”) and Dump just flops onto Linda for the pin at (4:02 shown).

Not the best match, as it’s just “whip people around by the hair” and “some dropkicks”, and Linda seems absolutely atrocious, not only interrupting Velvet’s attempts to cheat but bumping wrong a couple of times.

Rating: * (just some flinging around and basic cheating)

JAPAN’S CRUSH GIRLS (Chigusa Nagayo & Lioness Asuka) vs. LEILANI KAI & PENNY MITCHELL:
(WWF, March 16th 1986)
* So a year and a half before the Jumping Bomb Angels showed up, here are the CRUSH GALS of all people making time in the WWF. “Chigooza”, the biggest women’s star of all time, and Lioness are now “Crush Girls”. Leilani’s in black & Penny’s in a white singlet striped with blue. Chigusa’s in red & Lioness blue. Monsoon notes that “they look like twins”, and Jesse insinuates “Are you saying all Japanese people look alike, Gorilla?”, Monsoon rebutting that no- it’s just that THESE TWO in particular have the same haircut and body structure. “I’ll tell you something- every Japanese girl I see has one heck of a set of calves on ’em Gorilla- why is that?”

The Americans assault the Gals to start, but Lioness kips up after a bump and dropkicks Penny into the corner. Penny avoids another but Leilani gets her arm wringed as we get a close up of Zenjo commentator Shiono, called “Chiyono” by Monsoon- pretty wild to see even HIM on WWF TV. Ventura suggests he’s the Howard Cossell of Japan. Chigusa taunts Penny with a kick and takes her down with a leg hook, but Leilani calls Penny to “kick her!” from a double-knucklelock (she might actually be calling the match from there, lol) and they hit her with a double-slam. Monsoon marks out for the balance of the Girls, but Leilani hits a running leaping slap (a common Zenjo move) and works the arm. Leilani actually bites Chigusa’s wrist to stop a tag and Penny keeps on the arm before openly choking away, deftly hiding that with her body as she holds a wristlock with the other hand and jaws with the ref- classic heeling. Speaking of, the heels haul Chigusa to the corner and strangle her with the tag rope as Asuka protests, Gorilla now mixing up the girls’ names, but finally Leilani takes a huge bump missing a splash and it’s HOT TAG ASUKA, as she punches both heels in the boob and hits the dramatic ’80s karate chop sending Kai flying. An illegal double-team sees Chigusa miss a Bret elbow She sells theatrically and Penny comes in, but Chigusa quickly hits a the dramatic Crush Punch to the stomach. Leilani runs in for some cheating, but Chigusa ducks them and hits a double-dropkick, Asuka completing another one and hits a giant swing on Penny, and Chigusa finishes her with a flying body press at (7:05), actually popping the crowd!

The classics always work- heelish cheating, choking behind the ref’s back, illegal double-teaming, etc., followed by awesome babyface offense and great heel bumping. The theatrical chops and punches of the Girls were ideal for American audiences, as they were straight “Hollywood Karate” and Leilani just flung herself around like mad off them, and it made the Gals look like incredible athletes. Chigusa is maybe the best babyface seller ever, but was way more reserved here than normal given the more basic heel offense, but still managed to get the crowd into it. A 7-minute women’s match in front of New York fans could easily be a tough sell, but they pulled it off. Penny wasn’t half-bad here, with a great example of dishonest choking, but they let Leilani handle all the bumping.

Rating: **1/4 (good, classic tag wrestling)

DUMP MATSUMOTO & BULL NAKANO vs. SUSAN STARR & CANDICE PARDUE:
(WWF, unknown date)
* Never heard of the American team here. Pardue is a Moolah trainee who appears to mostly do jobs to the Glamour Girls alongside Penny Mitchell. Star had been around longer (1981 debut) and did a couple mini-tours in Zenjo. They’re in matching blue singlets with vertical stripes, Candice being a redhead and Susan a SKINNY brunette.

We’re JIP as Bull hits a slam on Pardue for two, screaming “one two THREE!” in English to Gorilla’s marvel. She hauls Starr in by her hair and Dump beats on her some, getting into it with the fans. Some blatant choking leads to a sandwich attack, but the heels belly-bash each other when Starr moves and Pardue’s back in, working a headlock as Bull has a go at her hair, then things turn into a REALLY interesting scrap as they mix up hairpulling with some potato-adjacent shots and try to interrupt each other’s shit and kick each other away, even when Dump starts doing cheating with the tag rope. Then Dump kicks her right in the face and Pardue rolls away and comes in with her fist up until the ref interjects like “I wanna see an OPEN HAND” and they do an awkward hand slap and Dump yells at the fans again and again, probably defusing whatever’s going on. Dump/Starr go at it, Dump hitting a big clothesline for two. She hauls Pardue in by the hair, but Pardue ducks a double-clothesline and… everyone stands their awkwardly and she just headlocks Bull over and Dump leaves of her own accord. This match is so weird. Starr gets brought in by the hair in our third instance of that so far, but pops Bull with a dropkick & high knee. Dump comes in and Pardue’s flung in (#4!), but Dump double-whips the babyfaces off the ropes and they double-dropkick her. Dump rolls off of that, but instead of another, it’s just STARR with a dropkick as Pardue just stands there, then THANK GOD they just go home, as Pardue gets flattened by a body attack, then a lariat finishes at (5:31). Then Dump actually FLIPS OFF Starr, which was very not OK on American TV in 1986, haha.

Weird, WEIRD match, as they seemed to be in total disagreement and were almost scrapping for real at one point, as people were taking issues with stiffness or just not communicating- Bull hauls Pardue down by the hair for a headscissors but Pardue just IMMEDIATELY jolts out and comes up, Bull nearly kicking her from the ground, and Pardue spends the rest of the match giving dirty looks and daring people to come at her. The language barrier makes this even more of an issue. Then you have the heels hauling the babies in by their hair every single time in a weird recurring thing.

Rating: *1/2 (I dunno even what to call it- just a scrappy mess with some fun bits, decent cheating and some counter-wrestling that just looks like a half-shoot)

THE CRUSH GALS vs. JUDY MARTIN & DONNA CHRISTIANELLO:
(March 8th 1986):
* Now the Gals are against Judy Martin of the Glamour Girls and Donna Christianello. Judy’s in blue and Donna’s in white & blue, with both having those “Moolah Looks”- broad backs, hunched posture, and that backless singlet. GORILLA MONSOON commentating a Crush Gals match is not something I ever thought I’d see. It takes him a bit to get word on which of the “Crush Girls” is “Lioness Ah-sooka” and which one is “Chigooza Nagoya”. Lord Alfred Hayes is doing color, and Danny Davis, pre-heel turn, is the referee.

Hayes LOLs at Chigusa trying for a handshake with Martin (“she’s in for a RUDE AWAKENING!”), then suggests that the WWF is the “number one in ladies wrestling”. haha, I know they HAVE to say that, but part of me wants to just Meltz Out with the sass, like “oh yeah, Jaguar Yokota’s okay, but she’s got nothing on ROCKIN’ ROBIN!”. Judy does some Memphis stalling, then gets PO’d at the fans for losing patience with it. The American girls do some cheating and slug down their opponents, who are played up as technically superior, doing a lot of quick counters that Judy in particular sells like nuts. Judy’s strong enough to catch Chigusa on a cross-body, but Lioness dropkicks them both over, popping the crowd, and the heels bail again. Monsoon cracks up at what they might be saying to the fans in the front rows (“I’m glad we didn’t pick any of them up”), which is great. Donna does the Disingenuous Heel Handshake spot, Lioness getting caught by Judy and choked about, but she kips up and whips Judy for a big karate chop. Chigusa gets booted coming off the ropes as Monsoon cracks about how “Imagine being her husband and complaining about the soup not tasting right” to pop Alfred as the heels dominate with cheap stuff, Gorilla missing that they’re using the tag rope to choke Chigusa out.

But once Judy starts throwing punches Chigusa smokes her, bringing in Asuka for a hot run, and Chigusa comes back with an illegal tag (Monsoon notes that it might be “part of the Japanese rules” and indeed it is- Chigusa was tagged in while standing on the inside turnbuckles, as tags are free-wheeling in Joshi Puro) and a Flying Elbow, hitting a Scorpion Deathlock, then-unseen in the U.S. (a “Crab-like maneuver”, Monsoon calls it). Lioness accidentally nails Chigusa with a flying clothesline and Judy starts stomping away, They double-team Martin like nuts while Danny Davis is just like “hey, come on” and the commentators give him shit for losing control, haha. Double Crush Punch to the gut has Judy struggling. Martin gets a lucky shot to tag out, but Donna’s IMMEDIATELY hit with a Double Dropkick, then takes Asuka’s Giant Swing for the pin (15:00)! This surprised me the first time I saw it, but now I’ve seen enough ’80s stuff to know that was an actual finisher.

It was a bit too long, with a lot of heel stalling, but they sold it as “wily, nasty vets beating on plucky technical stars”, and the Crush Gals offense impressed the audience, who probably wasn’t used to seeing women hit high dropkicks and spinning reversals of stuff. It’s easy to note Martin being in the ring for most of their offensive flurries, as she had the Japan experience to handle it, while Donna was left doing the job and only doing brief bits.

Rating: **1/2 (Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling, as Scott would say. Too long, but decent heeling and good comebacks)

THE CRUSH GALS vs. LEILANI KAI & BLACK VENUS:
(WWF, March 11th 1986)
* …. BLACK VENUS? Well at least she’s an athletic, attractive-looking black woman and not a racist sideshow from the turn of the century. She’s Jean Kirkland, who actually fought in AJW during the 1980s, so both she & Kai have AJW experience. Monsoon is back on commentary, but gets Asuka & Chigusa mixed up right from the start and is never corrected. The Gals are now called by their correct names in the chyron, at least. Finkel even pronounces “As’ka” right, this time!

Venus has some good presence and an amazonian physique, but moves stiffly and isn’t very good- the heels use “Moolah Offense” to come back but Venus believably powers Chigusa around. They start slow, with the Gals knocking the heels around- a big Asuka kick is sold despite missing by a mile, and because Monsoon is AWESOME, he actually calls it out and is like “the momentum carried her over” and “she was scared to death of it, I guess”, noting how the boot “really didn’t touch her”. Chigusa gets a pair of spin kicks (patented “Reverse Crescent Kick” from a solo Monsoon there), Asuka hits a Flying Clothesline on Venus (neither was legally tagged in), then the Gals hit a Double Karate Punch, and Chigusa nails a GREAT Bridging German Suplex for the pin (7:43). Didn’t see THAT move a lot in 1986 WWF! It was borderline a squash for the Gals, albeit with a couple minutes of heels controlling.

Rating: ** (not much to rate, but the Gals’ stuff looked good, even with Venus stiffly going around)