The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars – 11.19.94

The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars – 11.19.94

Originally written 01.03.26. The blog is pretty dead this weekend so this is the best you’re getting for a while.

Taped from Burlington, VT on 10.18.94, the taping that actually featured the Blayze-Nakano match reviewed on Wham Bam Bodyslam last week.

Your hosts are Vince McMahon & Jerry Lawler

Jim Neidhart v. The Undertaker

The comically oversized urn is getting completely out of hand at this point. I’m glad Kama eventually melted that thing down into a chain, it’s way too big. Anvil attacks after some stalling from the New Foundation, but Taker puts him down with a big boot and chokes him out in the corner. Taker with the ropewalk and a short arm clothesline, but Anvil puts him down with a pair of clotheslines and he sits up each time. So Anvil powerslams him and chokes him out, but the ref counts two anyway. That is some poor refereeing. WHY IS THERE NO SPECIAL TROUBLESHOOTING REFEREE WHO CAN CORRECT THIS INJUSTICE?!? They should get one. Neidhart pounds away with forearms to capitalize on this blatant cheating and lack of care from the official, and a suplex gets two. But then Paul Bearer retrieves a casket from the dressing room to rally his man while Neidhart drops elbows on him. Owen Hart is notably and understandably upset about this developement, since it’s not a casket match, but the referee doesn’t seem to care. But then Taker fights back with the flying clothesline and boots Neidhart into the casket to freak him out, and the Harts walk out at 6:05. This was pretty terrible and the officiating was bottom of the barrel. DUD

Meanwhile, IRS continues his investigation of dead and buried John Doe and his tax cheating, and we get a recap of him exhuming the grave to collect back taxes. So now the burial plot is being repossessed by the IRS in order to finally pay his due.

Adam Bomb v. Reno Riggins

Oh, together they could team up as Fallout New Vegas! Reno elbows out of a hammerlock, but Bomb hits him with a clothesline. Reno chokes him out on the ropes, but Adam sends him into the corner and puts him down with a back suplex and goes up with the flying clothesline before finishing with the Meltdown at 2:20.

Jeff Jarrett v. Mike Bell

Bell tries a hammerlock and JJ gives him an elbow RIGHT IN THE MUSH and hits him with a dropkick to take over. Jarrett with a snap suplex as Vince explains that the upcoming MSG rematch between Bret and Backlund will no longer have the previously announced special referee (ie, Randy Savage, never to be mentioned on WWF TV for a very very long time) so now it’s a no DQ, no countout match instead. Well given how the match ended up, that was all pretty meaningless anyway. Jarrett finishes with the figure-four at 2:45.

SURVIVOR SERIES REPORT! WITH TODD!

All of the heels threaten Chuck Norris and that’s about it.

Razor Ramon v. Nick Barberry

We actually take a break after Razor’s entrance. They’ve got some balls. Razor beats on Barberry with chops in the corner and hiptosses him, as apparently WWF wrestlers are going to be in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade. I imagine they’ll just up their steroid intake slightly until they inflate like balloons and get flown above the floats. Razor with the sack of shit slam and he puts the boots to Barberry before hitting him with the back suplex and Razor’s Edge to finish at 2:55.

The Heartbreak Hotel with special guests Bret Hart & British Bulldog. But then Owen Hart runs out with Mr. Bob Backlund to provide fair and balanced coverage of this debate. Shawn won’t let Bret get a word in, and then Backlund notes that Bret has a “constant proclivity to recede into barbarianism” and now Backlund is gonna chicken-wing Bret until he gets cancer and the title will be HIS. Shawn: “OK then. I think he’s had a little too much caffeine.” Shawn and Diesel no-selling Bob’s insanity is pretty funny stuff. Meanwhile Bert is still taking it deathly serious, which is probably why they never really meshed very well. The feud desperately needed someone who could match Backlund’s wacky energy.

King Kong Bundy v. Ben Jordan

Bundy drops a knee on him for two and finishes with the Avalanche and five count at 0:55.

And we wrap things up with Vince and Lawler backstage and checking out the casket in advance of Survivor Series. Weird ending.

NEXT WEEK: British Bulldog v. Bam Bam Bigelow! And there’s apparently some kind of big show happening at MSG at the same time as Superstars airs!

I will say, these shows did NOT make me want to rewatch Survivor Series in the least.