The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars – 09.21.91

The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars – 09.21.91

Originally written 09.28.25

LET’S GO BLUE JAYS!. Best thing about destroying the Rays 13-4 to win the division was that they didn’t have to depend on Jeff Hoffman not to choke in the last inning.

Taped from Rochester, NY, on 08.19.91. Yes this show is STILL from tapings that happened before Summerslam 91.

Your hosts are Vince McMahon & Roddy Piper

Sid Justice v. Kato

Roddy claims to have never seen Sid wrestle before. Well there is some truth to that I suppose. Sid’s theme is a sped up version of what would become Kona Crush’s theme. Sid beats on Kato in the corner and follows with a corner splash, and then hits him with a one handed chokeslam before tossing him and dropping him on the railing. Back in the ring, Sid boots him and puts him away with the powerbomb at 1:40. This was a pretty awesome squash debut for Sid on Superstars.

UPDATE! WITH MEAN GENE! BROUGHT TO YOU BY TOYS R US! Still active in Canada, by the way.

The big news: Macho Man was DENIED reinstatement by Jack Tunney, prompting Savage to destroy the office in a rage. So Mean Gene sits down with Randy, and he’s got his most thoughtful and sad tie-dye gear for the occasion. The sparkle is gone from Elizabeth’s eye thanks to the actions of Undertaker and Jake the Snake, and Tunney is stonewalling him! So maybe Sid Justice can get revenge for him, probably at an arena near you. Unfortunately injuries immediately derailed the long term story there.

Big Bully Busick v. Phil Apollo

So the Bully steals popcorn from a planted girl in the front row and dumps it on her head. Well that’s at least better than what Mel Philips used to do to kids in the front row. Busick beats on Apollo in the corner while Piper disgustedly buries Harvey Wippleman, and then Busick finishes with the most dangerous and disturbing submission hold in wrestling: THE STUMP PULLER.

Meanwhile, Virgil lets some kids in the dressing room rub his Million Dollar Belt. It was over his shoulder, just to clarify.

Superfly Jimmy Snuka v. Mike Williams

Snuka hits Williams with headbutts in the corner and chops while Vince advocates for Sgt. Slaughter to return to the WWF, and then Williams charges and hits the corner, allowing Snuka to roll him up for the pin at 1:40. Wow so impressive.

Ted Dibiase v. Mike Durham

Dibiase attacks in the corner and backdrops Durham before putting him down with the clothesline and he drops the fist on him. To the floor for a beating out there, and back in with a double axehandle and powerslam. Million Dollar Dream finishes at 1:55.

The British Bulldog v. Chris Duffy

Duffy grabs a headlock, but walks into a backbreaker. He tries a piledriver and Bulldog backdrops out of it and hits him with a delayed suplex before going to a chinlock. Corner clothesline and running powerslam finish at 2:10.

The Funeral Parlor, with special guest RIC FLAIR. The Real World’s Champion isn’t concerned with Roddy Piper, and he announces that he’s been calling Hulk Hogan’s name for years and Hulk has never had the guts to call back! Bobby standing there holding the Big Gold Belt was WILD back in 1991.

Big Bossman v. Dwayne Evans

Bossman pins him with the Bossman slam at 0:48, before Piper can even finish mocking the jobber’s ugly haircut.

Plus don’t forget to pick up BODYBUILDING LIFESTYLES magazine, with Mighty Mike Quinn on the cover!

Meanwhile, somewhere in a bullring in Mexico, Tito Santana has come to find himself. And hopefully get rid of his stupid Strike Force trunks once and for all. But he pledges to become EL MATADOR! Sounds like a supervillain origin story.

The Beverly Brothers v. Sonny Blaze & Scott Keller

So this is the debut of the Genius as their manager, as Vince notes that they’re dumped the Coach because he was a loser. They double-team Keller in the corner and then Beau tosses Blaze into the ring and chokes him out on the ropes before hitting a butterfly suplex. And the Beverly Bounce or Shaker Heights Spike or whatever they were calling it at that point finishes at 2:20.

Next week: Jake Roberts! And Ric Flair! I think that’s a big one, actually. Most importantly, they’re finally taping somewhere else!