The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars – 04.11.92

The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars – 04.11.92

And we wrap up 1992 Superstars with the final “Superstars of Wrestling” episode, the week after Wrestlemania 8. The roster is gonna start looking a LOT different really soon. Jake’s gone, Sid’s mostly gone, Hogan’s gone, just to name the three big ones. But of course there’s one big addition now.

Taped from Mobile AL on 03.08.92

Your hosts are Vince McMahon and a grumpy Mr. Perfect.

Meanwhile, at Wrestlemania, Randy Savage wins the WWF title again, Bret Hart regains the IC title, Undertaker squashes Jake Roberts, Papa Shango is hanging out in Sid’s dressing room, and then Ultimate Warrior returns for a shocking but still ill-fated run. And we get a promo from Warrior and Sid, setting up a feud that never happened.

Owen Hart v. Barry Horowitz

Owen works the arm and does his backflip wristlock reversal before taking Barry down with a dropkick. Meanwhile Vince puts over the hot new team of Owen and Koko B. Ware that all the kids are talking about. Owen with a belly to belly and he goes up with a flying splash to finish at 1:30.

Papa Shango v. Mike Casey

Yes it’s our weekly Papa Shango squash match as they shove this guy down our throats. Vince is pushing an Undertaker-Shango feud but they quickly pivoted elsewhere with it. Shango with a slam and elbowdrop and he finishes with the shoulderbreaker at 1:22.

Meanwhile, that dude in prison is still really angry about it.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan & Sgt. Slaughter v. Doug Somers & Charlie Stevenson

Vince spends the whole match talking about the new WWF Magazine while Perfect rages about Macho Man cheating, and Duggan finishes with the three point stance at 1:30 as this team’s completely pointless run concludes having gone nowhere.

UPDATE! WITH MEAN GENE!

Not even sponsored by anyone this week. Gene calls Savage’s win “one of the greatest WWF title matches of all time”, which is a stretch but whatever, and then we get a clip of the finish with Savage rolling Flair up to win the title and then Flair kissing Liz to kick off a brawl.

Shawn Michaels v. Dale Wolfe

Shawn and Sherri have matching jackets here as the focus is now on Shawn challenging Bret Hart for the IC title, which ended up being the house show run for a few months. Shawn hits Wolfe with a backbreaker and superkick, and then finishes with the teardrop suplex at 1:45. Hard to overstate how important the post-Rocker makeover for Shawn really was in terms of making him a big star.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Chicago, Paul Ellering is back in charge of the Legion of Doom and obviously this is gonna lead to a grassroots badass reinvention of the team, right?

…RIGHT?

The Mountie v. Bill Golden

Perfect ranting until Vince deadpans “Excuse me please, I’d like to hear the Mountie singing” is actually lowkey awesome. Vince had his moments as an announcer, you have to give him that. Mountie beats on Golden in the corner while Mountie v. Slaughter is floated as the post-WM feud, and Mountie hits Golden with a dropkick and pins him at 1:20.

MAJOR BREAKING NEWS (red siren emoji): SHAWN MICHAELS HAS LEFT THE BUILDING

Undertaker v. Sonny Trout

Yet another Undertaker squash to go along with all the Papa Shango squashes. Tombstone finishes at 1:40.

NEXT WEEK: Piper’s Pit returns with special guest Randy Savage! And the show has a new name! Hang on, that Piper’s Pit deal didn’t actually happen, so I don’t know what Vince is talking about there. They DID film one with the Brooklyn Brawler but it never aired.

Well, these first four months of Superstars were a blast for me to blow through, so I hope everyone enjoyed reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them!

Next time: WWF CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING 1986 BEGINS!

Also yeah maybe WBF Bodystars, we’ll see if it’s something I can actually review.