The SmarK Rant for WWF in MSG – 09.21.90

The SmarK Rant for WWF in MSG – 09.21.90

Originally written 09.11.25

OK, so after a 5 month break from the New York scene, the WWF returns after Summerslam 90 with a pretty different group of people from the last time they were there.

Taped from Madison Square Garden, drawing somewhere around 11,000.

Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon & Bobby Heenan

Paul Diamond v. Dustin Rhodes

Dustin gets “Crank It Up” as his entrance music like all tryout babyfaces. I didn’t actually realize that Dustin started this early on TV. Dustin takes Diamond down with an armbar and hangs onto it, but Diamond slugs away in the corner and then misses a charge. Dustin goes right back to the armbar but Diamond slams out of it and then takes him down with a legsweep. But then Dustin goes right back to the armbar until Diamond chokes him out on the ropes to break free. That gets two. Diamond with the chinlock, but Dustin elbows out and then misses an elbowdrop, but he comes back with a corner clothesline and Diamond somehow ends up getting a two count before going back to a chinlock. The crowd had been very generous with supporting Dustin up until now but they’re rapidly losing patience. Diamond gets a cradle in the corner off a missed charge, but uses the ropes and gets caught. And then Diamond does his own charge, which was supposed to miss, but Dustin forgets to move and Diamond awkwardly headbutts him in the gut before doing it again and missing this time. So Dustin makes his comeback and finishes with a lariat and bionic elbow at 13:10. God bless Paul Diamond for getting something vaguely watchable out of 1990 Dustin Rhodes because that kid was NO GOOD at the time. *1/4

Sgt. Slaughter v. Nikolai Volkoff

Hot take: I think they should have brought Slaughter in as the usual pro-USA babyface, and then had him turn on Jim Duggan and renounce the country later on. Or do the team with Hulk Hogan on an SNME and do the turn there, which would have given them a more clean line to the Hogan-Slaughter main event match they wanted. Would have had way more impact. Volkoff overpowers Sarge to start, and this prompts claims of hair-pulling in a funny bit. Volkoff with some slams and Sarge backs off. Sarge slugs away on the ropes, but Volkoff fights back and Sarge runs away and hides again before putting him down with a back elbow. That gets two. Volkoff makes a comeback and boots Slaughter down for two. Clothesline gets two, but Slaughter gets a Slaughter Cannon that somehow nearly misses as they’re just having a god-awful match here. And Sarge puts him in the camel clutch to finish at 8:32. This was probably one of the worst matches of the year, as Sarge looked old and washed. -**

The Barbarian v. Tito Santana

Barbie chokes him out on the ropes, but Tito sends him to the floor and then works a headlock back in the ring. Tito with a small package for two and he goes back to the headlock, but they fight on the apron and Tito gets a sunset flip. Barbarian sits down for two, but Tito finishes the move for two. Barbarian really loved doing that spot. Barbie runs him into the turnbuckles and goes to work on the back, but Tito makes a comeback before walking into a bearhug. Tito escapes that and makes another comeback, but Barbarian boots him down and goes back to the bearhug. Tito fights out again and goes for the leg, trying for the figure-four, but he gets caught on the flying forearm and dropped on the top rope. Barbarian gets two and goes up, but misses the flying clothesline and Tito goes to the top this time. Tito with a flying bodypress, but Barbarian rolls through for the pin at 13:20. When does Tito ever go to the top rope? **

Marty Jannetty v. Paul Roma

Roma sends Marty to the floor and they brawl out there, with Roma running his back into the apron before putting the boots to him back in the ring. Roma chokes him out on the ropes and sends him into the turnbuckles a couple of times before going up with a clubbing forearm that gets two. Roma with the backbreaker and a running powerslam, which gets two. Marty with a backslide for two. Roma stomps him down again, but Marty cradles for two, so Roma goes to the headlock as the crowd is just dead silent. Roma switches to a chinlock and Marty fights up after a couple of minutes in that, but Marty finally fights out and gets a suplex. They slug it out and Marty makes a comeback with a bulldog off the top that mostly misses. He goes up again with a flying fist for two, but Herc pulls Roma out to save. Marty tries a slam back in the ring, but Herc pulls the leg and Roma falls on top for the pin at 13:39. I’m assuming Marty was preoccupied with other matters before the match and didn’t feel like doing much here. *

Meanwhile, Sean Mooney runs down the card for October 19 and it certainly sounds like a show.

Rugged Ronnie Garvin v. Bob Bradley

Bob has some impressive Al Snow Crazy Eyes going on here and he works a headlock to start while Bobby notes that Ronnie has a “Bart Simpson look going” in a reference that certainly won’t make any sense 35 years later or anything. See, back in 1990 there was an animated show called The Simpsons that was pretty popular. Not sure if anyone today remembers it. Garvin escapes the headlock while Heenan does Bossman’s Mama jokes to fill the dead space that is this match. Bradley with a slam and he chokes Ronnie down, but Ronnie finally comes back and runs him into the turnbuckles before putting him down with a sleeper. Garvin Stomp and Hammer Jammer look to finish, but Bradley thumbs him in the eye and stomps him down to take over again. Gorilla keeps saying that there’s something wrong with Garvin because he’s so lethargic here and doing nothing. Bradley keeps choking him out and beating him down over and over, and Garvin bails to the floor, but he comes back in with with a flying bodypress for two. The crowd boos that because they wanted this to be over. And then Bradley drops an elbow for two, but Garvin cradles for two and the crowd boos LOUDER. JUST PUT HIM AWAY ALREADY. And finally he wins with a sunset flip at 11:39 and the crowd gives him a sarcastic cheer on the way out. And that was the last appearance at MSG for Garvin on his way out of the promotion. -*. This was so bad that even Gorilla was repeatedly calling Garvin out for tanking the match.

Ravishing Rick Rude v. Hacksaw Jim Duggan

Rude tries a hammerlock, but does too much gyration and gets sent to the apron. Duggan wants a test of strength and Rude backs off, so Duggan compares him to Terry Taylor by making chicken motions. What a horrible thing to say about someone. Duggan with an atomic drop and a slam, giving us some quality Rude selling, and Duggan goes to the bearhug. Rude goes up with a forearm to the back and tries a sleeper after chinlocking Duggan for a bit, but then he goes up again and Duggan hits him on the way down and makes the comeback. Duggan misses a charge and Rude beats on him in the corner, but the ref gets in his face and Rude shoves him away for the DQ at 9:14. Just a match, although this was of course Rude’s MSG swan song as well. *1/2

Bobby Heenan stays in the ring after the match and cuts a promo on Bossman’s mother, but Jim Duggan chases him away with the 2×4.

Ultimate Warrior & The Legion of Doom v. Demolition

LOD makes their MSG debut and Ax makes his MSG exit, and Warrior bowls over some poor geek photographer on the way into the ring. Warrior cleans house on Demolition before the bell and say what you will, but the crowd is JACKED for this one. But then Smash immediately beats Animal down, and Animal powerslams him for two. Crush comes in and the LOD double-team him in the corner before Crush hits Hawk with a backbreaker. He goes to the back with forearms, but Hawk dropkicks him and adds a shoulderblock and fistdrop for two. Ax comes in and that brings in Warrior, who beats on him in the corner and then hits more clotheslines and slams while Demolition keeps feeding him. But then a splash misses and I guess Warrior is face in peril for this one. That’s a weird choice, given that Warrior is one of the greatest hot tags ever. He’s like a video game character who gets his Special Meter filled up while standing on the apron and then comes into the match loaded up with all three super combo finishers. Smash and Crush haul him to the floor and beat on him out there. Back in, Smash beats on the ribs and they put in the corner for some of the classic Demolition double-teaming, but Animal breaks up the Decapitation. So Warrior makes his own comeback and makes the hot tag to Animal, who runs amok until the heels double-team him again. So Crush beats on him in the corner and goes to a bearhug as I guess we’re getting another heat segment. This match is really, REALLY, clunky. Smash chokes out Animal on the floor for a bit and Crush blocks the tag, allowing Ax to choke Animal in the corner some more. Smash with a back suplex for two. He goes to a chinlock, but Animal powers out, so Ax comes in and goes to his own chinlock. You’d think that after a decade of trying to get the Warriors, Vince would have just trusted them to do their own thing, but NOPE, here they are a month into their run working a WWF style kick and punch match already. Animal gets a clothesline out of the corner and makes the hot tag to Ultimate Warrior, who is of course a house of fire, and he pins Smash with the big splash at 13:09. This was a giant disappointment on every level. ½*

Holy cow there were some really bad matches on this show and the post-Summerslam doldrums were really hitting the promotion hard, with Warrior flopping as champion and Rude soon to be on his way out. Most of this show is available on WWF Supertape 3 if you want to check it out. For me, take a pass.