The SmarK Rant for WWE Vault presents Macho Man Mixtape
By Scott Keith on 29 November 2024
The SmarK Rant for WWE Vault Mixtape – Macho Man
Like I wasn’t gonna tackle this eventually.
First up in 1987, Mean Gene interviews Randy Savage, who has turned the WWF 180 degrees around, then another 360, then another 180 again. Macho has problems with the current Intercontinental champion, Honky Tonk Man, and also doesn’t like the Bobby Heenan family either. Macho can’t sing or dance but he can make romance, YEAH, now that he’s crossed the right bridge and found himself on the right side. It’s MACHO MADNESS now.
Next up, we get some very old footage of Macho working out in the ring in ICW and doing a TV spot for the local TV station.
WWF title: Ric Flair v. Randy Savage
From Wrestlemania VIII obviously, but we’ll give it another look. Hold up, did they dub the actual Zarathustra theme over Flair’s WWF Zarathustra-ripoff here? That’s weird. They brawl in the aisle and Perfect immediately goes after Savage like a thug, but Savage fights him off and beats on Flair in the ring. Back elbow gets two. Flair backdrops him to the floor and then runs him into the railing to take over. Back in the ring, Flair puts the boots to him and a suplex gets two. To the corner and a chop gets two. They fight to the floor again and Ric runs him into the apron and slugs him down, which has Bobby very happy. Suplex back in the ring gets two. Macho comes back with a neckbreaker and it’s a double down, but Flair goes to the eyes and to the top. Unsurprisingly that goes badly for him and Savage comes back with a backdrop out of the corner and the clotheslines. Flair Flip and Savage catches him with a clothesline on the way down for two. Back to the floor and Macho follows with the double axehandle and sends him into the post to bust him open, which of course earned him a stern talking-to after the match. If there’s one person who won’t stand for moral depravity, it’s Vince McMahon! Back in the ring, Macho beats on the cut and gets another double axehandle for two. The crowd is just rabid for the near-falls, and Macho goes up for the flying elbow, which only gets two as Perfect saves and pulls Macho out of the ring before leading Flair up with knuckles. So Flair knocks Macho out and that would seemingly do it, but it only gets two, and Flair beats on him in frustration before Perfect adds a chairshot to the knee for good measure. Figure-four time, but Elizabeth comes out to help, presumably having broken the lock on her dressing room to escape. Macho reverses the figure-four, but the knee is still hurt, so Flair goes after it again and Savage gets a small package for two. Flair dedicates the beating to Liz, but stops to WOO one time too many, and Savage rolls him up to win the title at 18:00, giving us one of the all time great Finkel calls for the final culmination of the Savage-Liz storyline. Interestingly, they edit out Flair forcing himself on Liz and cut right to her slapping him. I still love the match, with high stadium wrestling drama and the crowd going crazy for Macho, who finally gets to win the World title on his own merits outside of the shadow of Hulk. ****1/4. My only major criticism is that I wish Flair had started working the knee earlier in the match to really sell the drama of the figure four, but whatever, it’s still great.
DANCE BREAK! Let’s hear from Macho Man, who is speaking from the heart, in terrible 90s synth pop form. Like did the backing vocalists not know how to say “Macho”?
Randy Savage v. Ultimo Dragon
So this is batshit crazy, from WCW Worldwide in January of 1998. Tony and Bobby discuss the smell of old arenas, like Dusty Rhodes in August, while Dragon gets a dropkick and does the corner handstand to confuse and anger Macho Man. Savage puts him down with an elbow and chokes him out with help from Liz, who was at peak hotness as Savage’s evil cohort. Macho slams him and drops the big elbow to finish at 2:28.
Back to 1995, as Randy Savage discusses his friendship with Hulk Hogan and notes that Mean Gene’s moustache is crooked.
And then we go all the way back to 1985 on WWF Championship Wrestling, as Randy Savage meets up with the five managers who have been courting him, and he talks about all the things he learned from them and then blows them all off and introduces Miss Elizabeth instead. Vince doesn’t know her name but he’s really excited to potentially poop on her.
Randy Savage & The Honky Tonk Man v. Hulk Hogan & Ricky Steamboat
Back in early 1987 for this one, as Savage is still IC champion. This is a dark match from Superstars, but we’ve got Vince and Bruno on commentary. Steamboat immediately whips Honky into Hulk’s boot and Honky sells like crazy for the babyfaces. Savage refuses to tag in and face Steamboat, so Ricky hits Honky with a bodypress for two. Back to the babyface corner and this time Hulk forces Honky to tag out to Savage, but Macho wisely runs away and tags Honky back in again because he has FREE WILL, YEAH. Dragon with the chinlock on Honky, who comes back with a sunset flip for two, but then Hulk comes in and Honky calls for a truce. Really I can’t believe Hulk would treat someone who just a few months earlier was supposedly his BEST FRIEND that way. Typical Hulk. He slugs away on Honky and Steamboat gets a sleeper while Savage freaks out on the apron, torn between taking action or letting Honky get beat up for his amusement. But then he interferes behind the ref’s back, because evil is always more fun, and the heels take over on Steamboat. Honky goes up with the fistdrop and Steamboat fights back, so Savage blatantly yanks him by the hair (after high-fiving Jimmy Hart for the evil scheme) and Honky slams Steamboat on the floor until Hogan can’t take anymore of anyone else but him cheating and getting away with it! He’s got a lot in common with another orange-colored weirdo who never seems to face any consequences for his bullshit. Adam Cole. Steamboat fights for the tag and Honky clobbers him from behind and rolls him up for two. But then Hulk gets the hot tag and hits Savage with the big boot, and it’s over to Steamboat to throw chops and get some revenge of his own. To the top, but Honky pushes him off, so Savage clobbers the ref and grabs the ringbell for an encore. So Steamboat steals it and threatens Macho, because apparently two wrongs make a right now, and Savage wisely runs away from this maniac. And he’s proven right, because they beat up Jimmy Hart for no reason as the match is a DQ at 12:00 or so. Disgusting amounts of disrespect for the Macho Man on display here. ***1/2
From Tuesday Night Titans nearing the end in 1986, Mean Gene brings on Dr. Kissenbaum to meet with Randy Savage and Elizabeth, as he explains that he ran Savage through extensive psychological tests to determine what makes him both Macho and Savage. So we take a look at Macho on the couch, carrying the IC title around even in therapy. To this day I don’t know why they never re-released the HULK WHO? shirt in the modern era. So they do word association and Savage is amazing here, as I’m astonished that the actor playing the doctor doesn’t completely crack up at all of his nonsense. Savage lists off all his answers talking about how he’s going to beat up Hulk Hogan, but then snaps when the subject of George Steele comes up and he storms off.
Randy Savage v. Hugh Morrus
From Monday Nitro in 1996, as Morrus attacks on the floor and then dares to steal the hat and jacket, ironically looking like a bro country singer in the process. So Macho gets fired up and hangs Hugh on the ropes with the jacket, which is a DQ at 1:20. And then he goes up and drops the big elbow for good measure. Look, you don’t mess with the Macho Man’s gear, that’s just good sense. And then the ref tries to stop him, so he drops the elbow on the ref as well.
Meanwhile, Macho Man kisses the Easter Bunny on the White House lawn. Oh my god, is that where Ramblin’ Rabbit came from?
Randy Savage v. The Undertaker
This is a dark match from Wrestling Challenge in 1991, with unretired Savage and evil mortician era Undertaker, which is apparently incomplete for some reason. No commentary either. Macho beats on him in the corner and then misses a charge, but recovers with a clothesline to the floor. Taker necks him on the top rope and slugs him down to take over before choking him out. These two could have had an interesting run together but just never crossed over at the same time for various reasons. Taker chokes and chokes in the corner and hits the leaping clothesline and ropewalk while Paul Bearer cackles annoyingly at ringside. Savage finally comes back and sends him to the floor with a high knee, and that’s where we leave it at 7:00. Well OK then.
Meanwhile, Savage practices dropping the big elbow in his backyard pool.
Meanwhile, we get some behind the scenes footage of Savage shooting the promos for the music video from earlier.
WCW TV title: Arn Anderson v. Randy Savage
We’re in 1995 now on WCW Saturday Night, with a match I’ve never seen but I remember thinking it was a 100% lock that Savage would win the title here. Tony describes the TV title holder as being “the most prominent wrestler on television” in order to really sell the importance of the belt. Arn stalls for a bit and Savage slugs him and gets a sleeper, and then takes him down with a single leg for two. Arn bails and Meng keeps Savage at bay, and back in the ring for a FULL ARMDRAG AND TWIST from Arn. Savage slugs him down and drops a knee for two, prompting Arn to run away again as they’re having a surprising amount of trouble finding anything here. AA finally runs him into the post and drops knees in the ring before going to a chinlock for a bit. They fight to the floor again and Arn gives him the boot laces and runs him into the apron, and back in for two. Back to the floor as Arn works on the back and the match remains shockingly lethargic. Savage fights back and sends him into the post, and back in for two. Arn goes to a chinlock with time running out and nothing going on, but Savage fights out and puts him back on the floor. Back in, Savage goes up with a crossbody for two and clotheslines him for two. Backdrop gets two. Arn tries to cut him off, but Savage takes out Robert Parker and goes up for the flying elbow for the pin at 15:11. But the time limit for the TV title had already expired, so it’s not a title change. Oddly, they’d waffle over the years between “The title is only on the line for the first 15:00” and “The match is only 15:00 long” for TV title matches and never really seemed to settle on which the “real” stipulation was supposed to be. The match was decidedly OK at best, as neither guy appeared to be in the mood to try much here. **
Meanwhile, Mean Gene interviews Randy Savage in the wake of losing the IC title, but THE CREAM RISES TO THE TOP, YEAH. And he’s the CREAM OF THE CROP, which is why it’s all Jack Tunney’s fault for allowing outside interference during his moment of glory. So now he’s gonna take it out on Hulk Hogan and win the WWF title too. Fair warning.
Randy Savage, Roddy Piper & Jim Duggan v. Ric Flair, Undertaker & Jake Roberts
Another dark match from Wrestling Challenge, looking like November of 1991 based on these pairings. Piper slugs Flair down and chases him out of the ring to start. So Jake comes in and he wants Savage, which prompts Piper to quip “YOU WANT HIM? YOU’RE STUPID!” and Savage immediately goes after Jake and chases him out of the ring again. Undertaker comes in and slugs it out with Duggan and the babyfaces actually work Taker over in their corner for a bit, but then Piper gets caught by Flair with a cheapshot and Taker chokes him out on the ropes to take over. Jake comes in with an atomic drop and dares Savage to do something about it before taking Piper back to the corner for more abuse. Piper comes back with a backslide on Flair for two and makes the hot tag to Savage, and it’s BREAKING LOOSE IN TULSA. Macho drops the big elbow on Flair and pins him at 8:48 for the win. This was about what you’d expect. *1/2
Meanwhile, Mean Gene meets up with Macho Man at his palatial estate in Florida, where he’s working out by the pool. Fun fact: Macho Madness is MORE SEDUCTIVE THAN SEX, YEAH. Gene chats with Liz about swimming and tennis and Savage snaps “Are you sure you’re not hurting your elbow from stretching the microphone all the way over there to talk to her?” But then the phone rings and interrupts, because a “major women’s publication” wants to offer Savage half a million dollars to pose for them, which is more than Burt Reynolds got! He’s not interested. And then a promoter from Japan calls and wants to offer $400,000 just to wrestle three men. Savage tells them to send those three guys right here to his backyard and he’ll beat them up for NOTHING, YEAH.
Jesse Ventura & Randy Savage v. Mario Mancini & Mike Rice
From Championship Wrestling in September 1985, as the heel team certainly has no issues with self-confidence. I should note that Mike Rice has “TR” on his boots so I suspect he might be using an alias here to avoid the humiliation of being beaten so soundly by the Macho Man. The heels trade slams on Mancini and then the so-called Mr. Rice comes in against his will and Macho drops the elbow on him to finish at 1:30. They did a couple of house show matches against Tito Santana level babyfaces but otherwise this team didn’t lead to anything.
Meanwhile, Randy Savage takes Elizabeth to France.
From WCW Monday Nitro in early 1997, Randy Savage returns after Halloween Havoc 96 and stages a sit-in until someone comes to negotiate with him. So the show is on hold because he won’t let anyone into the ring. First up, Chavo Guerrero tries to enter the ring for his match, but he tries to lay a hand on Macho’s shoulder in friendship and gets his ass kicked. Next up, Maxx Muscle comes out to talk sense in Macho, but it goes south for him pretty quickly as well. But after taking out Doug Dellinger and Alex Wright, finally Sting descends from the rafters and talks sense into him, via pantomime, offering him the baseball bat of friendship and leading him away.
Meanwhile, Randy does an interview where he explains the origins of the Macho Man name from his baseball days.
Meanwhile, Randy plays some softball with Shawn & Diesel, sarcastically promising to bunt before blasting a home run.
Mean Gene interviews Macho Man, offering some BANG BANGs of Macho Madness to anyone who wants to be sprinkled with it. BETTER TO BE RICH AND DEAD THAN POOR AND ALIVE, YEAH!
From WWF Superstars in 1991, as the now-retired Macho Man decides to ask Miss Elizabeth for her hand in marriage. Unfortunately their real marriage was falling apart at the time, but they popped a good buyrate at least.
Meanwhile, Macho Man races Jim Cornette in go-karts. Man, why did they never try a WWE-themed kart racing game? That seems it like would be printing money. Randy can drive the MACHO VAN, YEAH. That’s all I’ve got for ideas at the moment but if WWE wants to pay me I’ll think of more.
Intercontinental title: Ricky Steamboat v. Randy Savage
Another rarity with a house show rematch from Wrestlemania, one of Steamboat’s very few filmed title defenses. There’s no commentary here so I wish they had graphics for context, but I also like the “bootleg compilation tape” vibe of this thing so it kinds of fits with that anyway. Savage gets chased out of the ring and comes back with a slugfest in the corner before choking him out on the ropes, but Steamboat fights back, so Macho tosses him. Macho puts the boots to him on the way into the ring and then sends him to the floor again before stalking him out there and delivering a high knee, but Steamboat cradles him on the way into the ring for two. Macho tries a bodypress and Steamobat rolls through for two, so Savage ties his head in the ropes and beats on him there. To the top for the double axehandle and he puts him down with an elbow for two. Ricky comes back and hangs him in the Tree of Woe, but puts his head down and gets caught. He comes back with a chop off the middle rope and that gets two. Savage goes up for the double axehandle and gets nailed coming down, but he tries a sunset flip and Savage slugs him down for two. Ricky rolls him up for two, but Savage goes to the throat to cut him off again, before missing a charge. Steamboat catapults him into the corner for two, but Savage runs him into the turnbuckle and they collide for the double down. But then Savage grabs a metal object from ringside, swings and misses before knocking himself out, and Steamboat pins him to retain at 11:11. Obviously these guys are incapable of having a bad match. ***3/4
Mean Gene chats with Randy Savage about how Tito Santana has been lucky to escape with his IC title so far, but he’s NOTHING BUT GARBAGE, YEAH, and Macho has the prop to prove it. It’s a garbage can, see. Tito’s a grain of sand in the desert and Macho is the entire desert. In fact, Elizabeth is icing the champagne as we speak. Gene: “Champagne? What kind?” Macho: “Doesn’t matter, yeah!”
Randy Savage v. The Belfast Bruiser
It’s the night after Uncensored 96, on WCW Monday Nitro. Finlay works a headlock on the mat and goes to a chinlock, then hits him with forearms and takes him to the floor for a beating out there. Back in the ring for more selling from Macho, but of course he slams the Bruiser and drops the elbow for the pin at 5:00. Usual Savage formula here. *1/2
WWF title: Randy Savage v. Shawn Michaels
Another awesome 1992 rarity from the UK Rampage PPV in April 1992. They fight for a hammerlock to start and Shawn runs into a boot in the corner and pinballs around the ring off that. Back in, Savage tosses him and Shawn skins the cat, but Savage clotheslines him back to the floor and hits him with a double axehandle to the floor. But then Sherri messes with Elizabeth, chasing Liz back to the dressing room as a result, and that allows Shawn to attack Macho and run him into the railing to take over. Sherri sarcastically busting on him while he’s selling is tremendous. Back in the ring, Shawn with a backbreaker for two and slugs him down. Gorilla meanwhile accuses Sherri, without any proof, of shoplifting her outfits from British shops. Shawn slugs away in the corner, but Savage catapults him into the post for two. Man Shawn must have LOVED Curt Hennig. Savage with the necksnap on one side of the ring, and Shawn sells by bumping to the other side of the ring, so Savage hits him with a high knee to the floor and sends him into the post. And Shawn is all over that, taking a flying bump off the post and spinning three times in the air. Back in the ring, Savage with a double axehandle for two. Shawn puts him down with a lariat for two. Superkick gets two. Shawn to the top with a flying fist for Execedrin Headache #35, and he sends Macho to the floor for some abuse from Sherri while some trollop in the front row yells at her. She’s a former Queen, you’d think she’d get some respect in England. Back in the ring, Shawn slugs away for two. Macho fights back and Shawn takes a bump off that, before a collision sends the ref to the floor as well. So Savage necks him on the top rope and goes up for the flying elbow, but Sherri breaks that up anyway and puts the boots to Savage. Finally the ref is dragged in and Macho gets two. He has another discussion with Sherri that ends with him spitting on her, but Elizabeth returns and deals with Sherri, allowing Savage to hit a flying bodypress for two. Sherri interferes again and Liz yanks her down again, but now Savage misses a blind charge and Shawn gets a sunset flip for two. Savage goes up and misses a bodypress, but runs to the other side of the ring, springboards off the ropes with a second bodypress, and that gets the pin at 16:30 to retain. I have literally never seen him do that before, let alone win a match with it, so that’s awesome. Savage was obviously super motivated to be working with Shawn here and you KNOW Shawn wasn’t gonna pass up a chance to show off in his first title match. ****
I LOVED THIS. This was exactly the kind of hastily-assembled mixtape of stuff that I would have killed for in my tape trading days, with no attention paid to chronological order or sequencing, just someone putting together three hours of whatever awesome Macho Man footage they had access to. MORE OF THIS. Highest recommendation to check this out on the YouTubes.