The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro – 11.27.00

The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro – 11.27.00

Originally written 07.07.26

It’s the night after Mayhem, and we finally have a winner in the Presidential election, so we get a skit before the show where Jeff Jarrett lays out the White House representive with a guitar. Honestly that would be like the 150^th weirdest thing to happen in the news these days.

Live from Rockford, IL, drawing 3800 to kick off the Scott Steiner era.

Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson & Mark Madden

Three Count joins us to start, oblivious to the fact that there’s only two of them. And they’re quickly interrupted by MIA.

Three Count v. Corporal Cajun & Lt. Loco

The Misfits double-team Shannon as this is apparently a “harder edge” to the goofy military themed jobbers. Cajun with a DDT out of the corner for two, but Shane trips him up and Moore gets a fameasser for two. Helms comes in with a middle rope legdrop for two while Madden compares them to the Midnight Express, which I guess is valid in that both of them were tag teams. Otherwise, NO. They continue double-teaming Lash as Tony has to say, WITH A STRAIGHT FACE, that these teams “have to be considered” as top contenders to the World tag team title. They’re not even top contenders to being first for the catering table in the dressing room. Everyone brawls on the floor and Evan Karagias comes down and hits Shannon with a ladder, which the referee somehow misses completely, and Chavo pins him with a brainbuster at 4:00. *1/2. God bless WCW for putting Three Count in a show stealing spotfest on the PPV and then completely burying them on the very next show.

Meanwhile, Elix Skipper continues putting the moves on Miss Jones and making an enemy of the Cat, but Lance Storm hits Cat from behind with a chair to stick up for his lackey. Oh lucky Lance, now he gets to feud with Miller.

Meanwhile, the announcers note that Sting had won the Lethal Lottery thing a few weeks back and earned a title shot tonight at new champ Scott Steiner, but he’s injured, so that’s not happening now.

Scott Steiner joins Mean Gene with his new belt, and it’s kind of crazy that this was his one and only World title reign. Anyway, he won the title and relates how he went back to his hotel room and had a lineup of naked women who wanted to have sex with him, so he had sex with all of them while naked and it made him all energized and ready for a fight tonight. But Sting is injured and so is Booker T, so he’s left with championship blue balls. The crowd wants Goldberg, but he’s not interested in that match. That was supposed to be the Starrcade main event before they moved it up to Fall Brawl for whatever reason. So Steiner is about to leave and presumably have more sex with women in his hotel, but Ric Flair interrupts and puts him over as the face of the company now. Remember just a few months before this when Steiner was constantly burying Flair week after week and it led to nothing? Anyway Ric has a Starrcade opponent for Scott, and Scott goes off script and challenges Rock and Steve Austin and buries them. And then Stevie Ray comes out, looking for revenge for his brother, but Flair is having none of that, and when he notes that Booker T might never wrestle again, the crowd CHEERS. So Stevie wants a title shot tonight, but Steiner demands that Stevie put his career on the line as collateral. This was BRUTAL.

Meanwhile, The Boogie Knights buy the services of Kronik yet again.

Meanwhile, General Rection demands that Bam Bam Bigelow brings it tonight for the US title.

Lance Storm v. Jimmy Yang

They’re working yet another bizarre angle with Leia Meow as a dominatrix who treats Yang like crap. Yang attacks from behind and cradles for two, then uses karate on the taped ribs while Madden calls him “Kwang” as a hilarious joke. Storm lays him out and hits him with a backbreaker for two. Sunset flip gets two and Yang slams him on the ribs for two. Yang goes up with a moonsault press for two, but the women brawl at ringside while Storm hits a Gotch piledriver. And of course the ref is completely distracted and blind while Cat comes in and hits Storm with a chair, putting Yang on top for the pin at 3:30 in a garbage finish that doesn’t help either guy. Match was fine, Storm did his best despite clearly being beat up. **

Meanwhile, Storm yells at Jim Duggan for not helping him. Duggan was openly doing interviews and talking about how he hated being in the group and wanted out, so I guess is this how they’re going to do that.

Meanwhile, The Boogie Knights continue trying to buy help, this time from the Harris Brothers. And they’re charging less than Kronik, so they win the bidding war for sandwiches and drinks because they wanted to get back on TV anyway.

Lex Luger joins us, excited to announce that he has retired Goldberg, because Goldberg speared the ref at the PPV and thus that’s a DQ and Bill should have lost his streak. So we’ll find out the deal with that tonight I guess.

Meanwhile, Jeff Jarrett tries to annoy Mean Gene, but Gene tells him to “blow it out his ass”, and the Filthy Animals mess with the lights and throw eggs at Jeff as a hilarious prank.

Meanwhile, Vito and his sister Marie are chatting backstage, but Vito leaves and Reno moves in on her.

Knoble & Karagias v. The Boogie Knights

Sadly, Disqo is injured, so we get the Harris Twins instead.

Knoble & Karagias v. Alex Wright & Ron Harris

Ron hits Karagias with a slam and Wright gets two from that. Back to Ron, so Knoble comes in and hits Ron with a flying clothesline. Ron puts him down with a big boot, treating him like a complete geek, and Wright gets two from that. And then Knoble and Karagias argue about Evan’s showboating and can’t get on the same page, allowing the Harrisses to double-team Knoble and hit him with the double chokeslam, putting Wright on top for the pin at 2:45. Another waste of everyone involved. DUD

Meanwhile, BLOOD RUNS COLDER as the announcers bury it while it’s playing and call it a rib on them.

Meanwhile, Ric Flair is in the boardroom somewhere to address the Goldberg thing, and he points out that Luger pulled the ref in the way, so it’s not a DQ and Goldberg’s streak continues. Because WCW is about winning and losing. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA YEAH OK. So Ric books a rematch at Starrcade to decide things once and for all.

Kevin Nash & DDP join us and HOLY FUCK they’re back to doing that Scott Hall shit despite him being gone and never coming back. Tony: “Where is this going?” I have the same question. So DDP talks about teaming with Nash back in the early 90s as The Vegas Connection and how they sucked (true) and then dubs their current team “The Insiders” and petitions for Hall to be brought back again. Just to give some context here, Hall had literally just been arrested for a DUI after crashing his car, and his name was such poison that the company literally told everyone not to even mention his name ever again. So of course these clowns go out there and try to get him over as a babyface hero. Anyway, Mike Sanders interrupts and challenges them to a tag title match at Starrcade against Jindrak & O’Haire, but the champs want the match right now.

WCW World tag team title: Kevin Nash & DDP v. Sean O’Haire & Mark Jindrak

O’Haire works on Nash in the corner, but Kev fights back with the corner clothesline and framed elbows. DDP comes in and Jindrak hits him with a springboard clothesline for two and the Thrillers work Page over in the corner, but DDP gets a lariat for two. O’Haire pulls Nash out of the ring, which is the biggest bump that Nash has taken in months, while DDP hits the Diamond Cutter on Jindrak for two. The Thrillers all hit the ring and take out the ref and then beat down Nash on the floor and steal the belts for a non-finish at 4:00 or so.

Meanwhile, Stevie Ray is ready to dish out revenge on Scott Steiner with his career on the line. See, it’s not just AEW who can book World title matches with careers on the line.

Reno v. Goldberg

Reno attacks, but Bill slugs him down and hits him with a clothesline and press slam. Reno tries to roll the dice, but Goldberg just blocks it and slams him and then wham bam spear and jackhammer finishes at 1:38.

Afterwards, this brings down Flexy Lexy and his chair for a beatdown, which is like the third chair beating of the show, and he puts Goldberg in the rack as Tony says “Goldberg couldn’t hear Luger come to the ring because of the crowd noise.” Yeah sure let’s go with that story.

Meanwhile, Gene recaps the hilarious punking the Filthy Animals did to Jeff Jarrett earlier, and the Animals all make fun of Jeff for being from the south.

US title: General Rection v. Bam Bam Bigelow

They slug it out as Rection is back to wearing his usual Hugh Morrus gear and even Madden calls it out. Bigelow beats him down in the corner and adds some clubbing forearms and a chinlock while Hudson wonders if Rection shouldn’t be the #1 contender to the World title because he’s US champion. Madden: “This isn’t Georgia Championship Wrestling, no one cares about that US title as #1 contender crap”. Charming. Rection goes up and misses the moonsault, allowing Bigelow to powerbomb him and set up a table, but then the Wall steals the table and Rection finishes with the moonsault at 4:35.

Meanwhile, Scott Steiner doesn’t care who Flair found for his Starrcade opponent, so he charges out to the limo in the parking lot, which had pulled up earlier in the show and was said to contain the challenger for Starrcade. But Scott pulls open the door and finds MI Smooth out there, resulting in a beatdown from Steiner. So this is not the limo he was looking for. But then we learn there’s a SECOND limo on the way, and this one is the actual limo we’re waiting for. Honest.

Jeff Jarrett v. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Rey gets a facejam and a legdrop for two, but Jarrett catches him with a powerslam out of the corner. So Konnan takes the ref and Rey and Kidman double-team Jarrett for two. Rey tries the broncobuster, but Jarrett kicks him in the nuts on the way down as Rey takes a spectacular bump off that. The Animals all double-team Jarrett with the referee watching the whole thing and doing nothing, but Jarrett misses a charge and crotches himself. Rey with a quebrada for two. The Animals all gang up on Jarrett AGAIN, but Rey tries a springboard and Jarrett powerbombs him and hits the Stroke, but the Animals all jump him again and beat him up on the floor. So Jarrett finally grabs the guitar and smashes Rey and THAT’S the DQ?!? Rey took some good bumps here but the Animals looked like complete clowns who somehow couldn’t beat Jarrett 4-on-1 with the ref letting them do whatever they wanted. **

WCW World title: Scott Steiner v. Stevie Ray

Scott attacks him on the floor and hits him with the pipe in the aisle. Into the ring, Scott beats him down, but Stevie comes back with a pump kick. Scott drops him with the clothesline and does some pushups before slugging him down in the corner and beating on him with chops. Stevie fights back and Scott hits him with a belly to belly for two. Scott with a DDT and a backbreaker and he goes up for a flying nothing, which Stevie blocks with a Bookend that looks like shit. That gets two and no one buys it as a near-fall despite the announcers screaming. They head to the floor as Stevie looks completely blown up and Madden points it out. Back in the ring, Scott continues destroying him with an exploder for two. Ray literally can’t even run the ropes at this point. He barely hits the Slapjack for two and goes after Midajah, which allows Steiner to suplex him again and finish with the Steiner Recliner at 5:40, ending the career of Stevie Ray. Given how horrible that match was and how Stevie looked like he was on the verge of a heart attack after like 2 minutes in the ring, that’s probably a good thing. -***

And then Sid Vicious quickly comes out to point at Scott as the show rushes off the air. So that’s Starrcade. Scott Steiner v. Sid. Yup. That’s what they actually came up with.

People in the comments keep saying that this show got better after Russo left but I’m sure not seeing it yet. Because this one was somehow even worse than usual.