The SmarK Rant for WCW Fall Brawl 2000 – 09.17.00

The SmarK Rant for WCW Fall Brawl 2000 – 09.17.00

Well since I can still access the WWE Network until further notice, we’ll continue on with the WCW 2000 project, and next up is a redo of Fall Brawl, yet another show I haven’t watched since the original airing and remember nothing about.

Live from Buffalo NY, drawing 8638 and a 0.16 buyrate. Not gonna lie, getting 8700 people into an arena for a WCW PPV in 2000 is pretty impressive, even if it was heavily papered to get there.

Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden & Scott Hudson

WCW Cruiserweight title: Elix Skipper v. Kwee Wee

Major Gunns is back to being reluctantly Canadian here after seemingly being into it on Nitro. Kwee Wee attacks and slams Skipper to the floor right away, but Elix regroups and goes after the arm. Kwee Wee reverses to his own armbar and they counter each other with what is a pretty torried pace for WCW 2000, and Skipper makes the ropes. Kwee botches a leapfrog and goes back to working the arm instead, but Skipper runs him into the corner and hits him with a flying forearm to the back of the neck to put him down. I like Kwee Wee’s color scheme here with the purple and orange, it actually pops really well. Skipper bails to the apron and tries a springboard moonsault, but Kwee moves, so Skipper lands on his feet and hits a dragon suplex for two. Elix puts the boots to him for two and drops a leg off the middle rope for two. Scott decides to reference “Rubber Man” Johnny Walker from the 60s and the other two make fun of him for that. Fun fact, Walker is better known later on as Mr. Wrestling II after he retired and then got talked into repackaging himself under a mask. Skipper with a chinlock, but Kwee Wee tries a crossbody and they tumble to the floor in an awkward spot. They’re really sloppy here but I can’t blame guys for being so excited to show their stuff that they overshoot sometimes. Especially during a period when everyone was sleepwalking while the Titanic sank. Skipper hits a gigantic moonsault to the floor, taking out the camera on the way down, and back in that gets two. This brings the Natural Born Thrillers out to watch the match, and Kwee comes back with a kneelift and Thesz Press for two. Backdrop gets two. Kwee tosses him and drops him on the railing in another impressive bump for Skipper, but Mike Sanders runs in and takes out Kwee Wee with a weapon. Skipper comes in with a flying bodypress, but Kwee Wee rolls through for two. Skipper bridges to dodge a clothesline and clips the knee, and the Overdrive finishes at 11:05. I was not yet as sick of the Overdrive as I would become some years later, thankfully. This was actually a great opener as they were just going balls out to get themselves over, and good on them for trying. ****. The Sanders interference ended up meaning nothing, of course, so maybe Johnny Ace was getting back into booking the finishes again.

Three Countv. Lt. Loco, Corporal Cajun & Sgt. A-Wall

My god, Three Count gets to work with someone who isn’t the Jung Dragons? The MIA double-teams Shannon to start and Cajun does his goofy punches, but Shannon moonsaults him for two. Karagias comes in and hits Cajun with a leg lariat, but Shane misses an elbow and it’s over to the Wall. Hudson notes that Sugar Shane is the most underrated wrestler in the match, which proved to be prophetic since he ended up being the biggest star of the bunch. Three Count double-teams Cajun with a neckbreaker for two, and Shannon hits a fameasser for two. Karagias comes in with a Rockerplex for two. Evan with a powerslam and he goes up with a flying elbow for two. Shane with a flying sunset flip for two and he follows with a legsweep for two, setting up Shannon for a flying splash that gets two. Shannon chokes him out on the ropes and gets two off that, but Wall comes in and quickly takes a low blow. So they head to the floor and Three Count goes flying with dives on everyone, but Shane walks into a chokeslam from Wall. Shannon and Evan break it up, however, and Shane superkicks Wall through a table at ringside. They double-team Chavo in the ring, but Shane superkicks Evan by mistake and Chavo gets two with a powerbomb. Double DDT by Three Count on Chavo and Cajun, but Wall makes the save and Cajun hits Shane with a Mayday slam for the pin at 10:31. Another really hot match although this was clearly all Three Count. ***

Meanwhile, a little kid asks Kevin Nash for an autograph, but Big Kev won’t sign for the $1.50 that he had. I mean…fair enough?

Chain match: The Harris Brothers v. Kronik

Adams wants to up the ante and make it a First Blood match so that nobody has to job. Everyone brawls to start and they head into the crowd as the announcers say about 18 times that it’s not going to be a scientific classic. No kidding? Back into the ring and the ref gets bumped as they continue with the kicks and punches. And then Ron gets a baseball bat from somewhere while bleeding, but the ref is out and can’t see it. So the Harrisseseseses double-team Adams and I guess bust him open because the ref revives and calls for the bell at 6:40. Terrible match with a terrible finish. DUD

Canadian title: Lance Storm v. General Rection

The newly retired Hacksaw Duggan is the special outside referee in case you couldn’t guess what was coming. Rection beats on Storm with chops in the corner and backdrops him, so Lance bails to the floor. Back in, Rection blocks a crucifix with a samoan drop and follows with a corner splash, but Storm dodges a second one. To the top, where Rection gets a superplex for two. Storm goes low and puts the boots to him to take over, and a superkick gets two. Storm dumps him and follows with a dive while the announcers do this whole nonsense discussion about how everyone in the locker room loves Bill DeMott and they’re all watching at the curtain backstage because they care so much about this dumb midcard match. Back in the ring, Rection with a powerslam for two. Madden: “I don’t know why Storm should be scared of Duggan anyway. He only has one kidney. It was nothing to do with disease, he just sold one of them to buy booze.” Storm goes for the Maple Leaf and Rection powers out of that and hits him with a suplex, and then a clothesline to the floor, which allows Duggan to throw him back in. But then of course Duggan heads into the ring to “cheer Rection”, but Gunns takes the ref and Duggan turns and allows Storm to finish with the Maple Leaf at 6:48. And then we get one of the dumbest reveals of the year, as Duggan has a Canada shirt and has defected North. Match was OK. **

Meanwhile, the Natural Born Thrillers annoy Gene, who quips “Blow it out your ass, O’Haire, I know guys who can take out your kneecaps!” Well now we know how Sean ACTUALLY died.

Elimination match: The Natural Born Thrillers v. The Filthy Animals & Paul Orndorff & Big Vito

So this is another secret storyline where guys in the Power Plant are all mad at Paul Orndorff for reasons we never explored on TV, so he’s teaming with the Animals, who are suddenly babyfaces I guess? Rey wins a chase with Jindrak and hits him with a legdrop, but the NBT double-team him as O’Haire comes in. Juvy beats on Sean with chops and necks him on the top rope to set up a springboard dropkick. But then O’Haire catches him with a falcon arrow, so it’s over to Vito. He beats on Jindrak with chops, but Disqo tags himself in as the announcers continue burying him as a complete moron despite his presumed babyface status at this point. O’Haire cuts off Disqo’s comeback and beats on him in the corner, so Konnan has to come in so he can do his same three moves that he’s been doing since 1997, and get pinned by O’Haire after a Disqo stunner gone wrong at 6:20. So Disqo is in and then regrets it and wants out again, but none of the Animals will tag him and Reno ROLLS THE DICE to finish Disqo at 7:00. So we get the Vito v. Reno showdown, which still has a mysterious history we don’t know about yet because it’s another Secret Storyline, and Vito runs wild and DDTs Chuck for two. Vito gets his stickball bat, but he walks into a kendo stick shot from the apron and Reno ROLLS THE DICE to finish him at 8:46. Juvy tries next and he runs wild with the dreaded Spinning Body Attack on Reno and the Drunk Driver to set up Rey’s diving nutcracker to finish at 10:52. Jindrak and O’Haire double-team Juvy as this is really dragging badly, and they hit him with a double hiptoss from the floor into the ring in an impressive spot, before Sean finishes with the swanton bomb at 12:13. So then Paul Orndorff comes in and decides to take everyone on himself with his one terrifyingly shrivelled arm. Piledriver finishes Johnny at 13:32. He slugs away on O’Haire with his one good hand and then piledrives Jindrak, but gives himself a stinger and O’Haire pins him at 15:00. And Orndorff is decidedly not OK while the match continues for a bit and they all stumble around the ring and don’t know what to do. Finally Charles Robinson just stops the match at 16:48 so they can get him some help. And that’s why you don’t put guys with serious spinal damage into the ring for no reason. *

Meanwhile, Madusa is sick of Torrie Wilson’s attitude and crap although once again all of the backstory happened off-screen so we don’t really know why she’s so mad, exactly.

Scaffold match: Shane Douglas & Torrie Wilson v. Billy Kidman & Madusa

Madden, really selling the danger of the match, notes that Madusa’s boob size is “48 long”. So they’re on a hydraulic scaffolding in front of the Nitro-Tron, but at least the wide angle reveals that they have lots of room to work in a safe space. Poor Torrie is just petrified of being up there and doesn’t even want to stand up or leave the safety of the supports on the side. Shane and Kidman do some spots on the scaffold while Madusa tries to climb down the ladder, which is apparently how you win? “Given a choice, she usually goes down” notes Madden for more gross slut shaming. Shane goes after her and kicks her off the ladder, and she takes a bump into a nice big crash pad, thankfully. The announcers clarify that she does not win, because you have to climb down the ladder and not fall off the ladder. And then Torrie goes low on Kidman and Shane throws him off into another crash pad, and that apparently allows Shane & Torrie to win at 5:01 and then they climb down the ladder, including a terrified Torrie slowly making her way down before I imagine running to the back and puking up her dinner in terror. I feel for ya, Torrie. Sticking someone who was so clearly terrified of heights in a scaffold match is typical WCW. This whole thing was stupid and pointless and the finish didn’t even make sense based on the internal logic of the match. DUD

Meanwhile, Jeff Jarrett interrupts a Sting interview and attacks him because he wants the title shot on Nitro tomorrow night.

Meanwhile, Mike Tenay heads to David Flair’s house, and a paranoid David offers him some floor pizza while Tenay tries to question him about getting left at the altar. That goes nowhere, so Tenay wants to know who the father of the baby might be. David strongly suspects his 11 year old brother Reid might be the father, but Tenay steers the conversation to Ric instead. Tenay notes that Ric never denied potentially being the father, but then David sees the mailman outside and thinks HE’S the father, then runs out to clothesline the mail out of his hands and puts him in the figure-four while Tenay desperately tries to save him. OK David was pretty funny here. Also I was gonna question why the mailman would be there on what was established to be a Saturday, but I guess there’s weekend mail delivery in the US. Not so in Canada.

Sting v. Vampiro v. Great Muta

ICP joins us on commentary as Diamond Donovan Douglas & Guido, and the heels double-team Sting on the floor while ICP makes up dumb names for simple moves. And even FUNNIER names for the people involved, like “The Great Poop Butt” for Muta. In the ring, the heels continue double-teaming Sting but Vamp has issues with Muta. Muta goes up with the moonsault for two, but Vamp pulls him off and ICP runs into the ring to mediate. And then Sting grabs his bat and cleans house before finishing Muta with the Deathdrop at 5:11. And the ICP goes after Muta, but Sting saves him and we thankfully move on quickly. DUD

Meanwhile, Mike Awesome reveals 80s star Gary Coleman on his bus, and Gary points out that he wasn’t around in the 70s. And then Pam Paulshock does Gary’s catchphrase and Coleman loses interest in her.

Bunkhouse match: Jeff Jarrett v. Mike Awesome

The Buffalo Bills are at ringside to cheer on Awesome, although WCW was under the impression that Doug Flutie would be there and that didn’t happen. I know this will shock you, but Flutie is a god-tier sportsballer in Canada. They brawl on the floor to start and back into the ring for some broom shots from JJ, but Mike takes him back to the floor for a chair-swinging duel. Mike wins that one and they head back into the ring, where Awesome gets backdropped through a table to counter a powerbomb attempt. But then Awesome runs Jeff into a barbed wire table in the corner to take over, and a pop up powerbomb gets two. But then Jarrett yells at the football people and they all storm the ring and go after him, resulting in Awesome hitting another powerbomb for two. Madden: “The Bills can’t even put away one guy! No wonder they only won 2 games this year.” Jarrett goes low on Awesome and retrieves his trusty guitar, but this brings out special enforcer Gary Coleman, who goes low on Jarrett to save Awesome. So Jarrett hits him with the guitar (as Coleman nearly loses the protective pad under his hat) but then Sting comes out as well, takes out Jarrett, and Awesome gets the pin at 9:09. So yeah, Awesome needed 15 guys and a ring full of weapons to beat Jeff Jarrett, which tells you that the match was a TAD overbooked. **1/2

Goldberg v. Scott Steiner

Steiner is still rocking the face mask, making him look even more like a deranged serial killer. Steiner tries slugging away in the corner, but Goldberg presses him into a powerslam, barely breaking a sweat. Scott bails to escape and they fight on the floor, but Scott gets the clothesline and elbowdrop while still talking trash to the Buffalo Bills at the same time. Steiner charges and runs into a boot. Madden: “These guys are so juiced up…on adrenaline.” Good save. Scott hits him with a cutter to block a backdrop attempt and follows with the belly to belly for two. But then Goldberg reverses a tombstone for two, but misses a spear and hits the corner. Scott goes up and Goldberg catches him with a powerslam, but they head to the floor again and Scott beats on him with a chair while Midajah joins us at ringside. Back in the ring, Scott hangs him in the Tree of Woe and grabs his lead pipe, but Goldberg spears him to counter. But then Vince Russo hits the ring and beats on Goldberg with the baseball bat, and Steiner gets two. Back to the floor as Steiner tries and fails to set up a table, and then just slams Goldberg through it anyway. Back in the ring, Scott gets the Steiner Recliner, but Goldberg makes the ropes. Although that shouldn’t matter because it’s no DQ anyway. So Goldberg powers up and drops Steiner on the top rope out of an electric chair, but Scott just powers up again and beats on Goldberg in the corner. This really didn’t need the interference. Russo and Midajah take turns beating on Goldberg with their weapons, allowing Steiner to suplex him from the top rope, for two. Back to the Recliner, but Goldberg flips him to the floor this time and then back in for a neckbreaker to counter a chairshot. Russo tries to interfere again, but this time Steiner knocks Goldberg out with the lead pipe himself, and puts Goldberg in the Recliner for a THIRD time, and Goldberg is out at 13:44. Absolutely incredible slobberknocker for Goldberg, clearly the best match of his entire career. ****1/4. They were just throwing each other around like ragdolls. It was such a great power battle that Tony Khan would put it on PPV and then immediately decide not to book either guy on TV for weeks!

WCW World title, cage match: Kevin Nash v. Booker T

No chance they’re following that last one. Nash beats on Booker in the corner with the elbows and goes to a surfboard, and a sideslam gets two. He exposes the turnbuckle, but Booker escapes Snake Eyes and comes back with a sidekick and axe kick. Nash with a chokeslam and they’re both down. Booker runs him into the exposed steel and Nash is busted open, so Booker slugs away in the corner until Nash clotheslines him down again. Big boot and Nash pulls down the straps and goes for the Poochiebomb, but Booker escapes and finishes with the Bookend to regain the title at 9:00. Well that was anticlimactic. We didn’t even get to hear about Scott Hall first! Just the usual Nash match. *1/2 By this point the writing was on the wall about who was needing to end up with that belt and it sure wasn’t Booker.

This was thankfully a huge upgrade over most of their 2000 shows, with the Goldberg-Steiner match the clear highlight of the night and really a highlight of the year overall. The main event couldn’t follow them and was a huge letdown, although thankfully the situation couldn’t get any WORSE for the World title, I’m assuming.

…RIGHT?

Thumbs up.