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The SmarK Rant for Pro Wrestling This Week – 03.28.87

By Scott Keith on 2 June 2024

The SmarK Rant for Pro Wrestling This Week – 03.28.87

Your hosts are Gordon Solie & Joe Pedicino

This episode is joined in progress with a Ted Dibiase & Steve Cox v. One Man Gang & Skandor Akbar match, with Gang trying a slam on Cox but Dibiase breaking out the loaded glove for old times’ sake and knocking Gang out to put Cox on top. So Steve Cox gets a title shot at the Gang in the future.

UWF TV title: Savannah Jack v. Eddie Gilbert

Joined with the ref getting bumped as Jack superkicks Eddie for the visual pinfall, but Iceman Parsons brings in an ETHER SOAKED RAG and smothers Jack with it, putting Gilbert on top for the pin and the title. Missy Hyatt looks happier than a date with Jim Ross after the win!

Michael Hayes interviews Iceman about his shenanigans in the previous match, but Iceman clears things up by calling Savannah Jack an “Oreo” and noting that he was only using the rag to clear the sweat out of Jack’s eyes.

WWC tag team title: Mark & Chris Youngblood v. Chicky Starr & Rotten Ron Starr

Joined with the Youngbloods running wild, which gives us the weird commentary in Spanish but with occasional English move names thrown in by Hugo Savinovich. It’s like “blah blah blah PLANCHA, blah blah blah ABDOMINAL STRETCH!” Chris beats on Chicky with tomahawk chops on the floor, but Chicky takes him out and the Starrs go to double-team Mark in the ring. But then Chris regroups with a springboard bodypress and gets the pin on Ron to either win or defend the titles, I’m not certain which. From what I can tell this is actually from the beginning of January so it’s nol like WWC was sending in really fresh material anyway.

Bill Apter joins for this week’s PWI rankings for Most Hated and NWA.

MOST HATED:

  1. Andre the Giant
  2. Ric Flair
  3. Randy Savage
  4. Lex Luger
  5. Danny Davis
  6. Tully Blanchard
  7. Michael Hayes
  8. DeBeers
  9. One Man Gang
  10. Brian Adias

NWA:

  1. Ric Flair
  2. Nikita Koloff
  3. Barry Windham
  4. Tully Blanchard
  5. Dusty Rhodes
  6. Lex Luger
  7. Kevin Sullivan
  8. Brad Armstrong
  9. Dick Murdoch
  10. Mike Rotundo

Next up, Bill talks about the upcoming Wrestlemania III main event, as Hulk is running around burning out all his emotional energy and Andre is playing it cool. And then Bill reveals his TOP SECRET prediction for the match, which is Andre the Giant by “controversial decision due to Bobby Heenan’s interference.” I was hoping for a prediction on the attendance as well.

WWF Ring Report as we prepare for Wrestlemania III. First up, Jim Duggan is sick of foreigners signing their national anthems here in America, where they don’t tolerate that kind of free speech. So Sheik and Volkoff are doing their song before a squash match, which prompts Duggan to storm off to the ring and chase them away with his 2×4. Also on the show, Andre the Giant models the new “super-sized” WWF title belt, which is actually a damn nice looking belt that sadly was never seen again. Andre complains that it still doesn’t fit, but Piper promises that if Andre wins it, he’ll help him fix the strap himself.

The British Bulldogs & Tito Santana v. Steve Lombardi, Al Navarro and ?

Davey powerslams Navarro and Tito finishes Lombardi with the flying forearm quickly.

PREDICTION TIME: Gordon thinks Bobby Heenan will allow Andre to win the title, but Joe goes with Hulk Hogan. Joe thinks Randy Savage will outsmart Steamboat and retain. Gordon thinks Roddy Piper will shave Adrian bald, due to his longtime emotional connection with Roddy.

Bull Nakano & Dump Matsumoto v. The Jumping Bomb Angels

Joined with Dump beating on Noriyo, but Noriyo comes back with a metal basket of some kind and gets some shots in. Over to Bull Nakano, who gets a sleeper on Noriyo, but we’re clipped to Bull using kendo sticks on the Angels, and then they fight to the floor and people start diving. But then Bull uses the stick to bust Noriyo open, and they all fight to a double countout.

Off to Continental…

Robert Fuller & Jimmy Golden v. Rip Rogers & The Executioner

Joined with Rip beating on Fuller and choking him out on the ropes, but the Executioner comes in and Fuller makes the hot tag to Golden, who looks nothing like he would a decade later as Bunkhouse Buck. Fuller rolls the Executioner into the leglock to finish while Rip walks out on his partner.

Off to Memphis…

This week, it’s a video feature on young rookie sensation Bam Bam Bigelow, done to “War Machine”. Hey, that works well as a wrestling theme, someone should steal that! Even though his gear was terrible at this point, Bigelow looked awesome in this and was obviously about to become a huge star.

To the AWA…

AWA World tag team title: The Midnight Rockers v. Big Bubba & Goliath

We’re actually still in Memphis, with the Rockers doing a stop in the Mid-South Coliseum. Bubba & Goliath were the Southern tag team champions at this point, challenging for the big belts. Bubba was not the Ray Traylor version, but rather Fred Ottman early in his career. Goliath is one of the numerous guys to play Moondogs in Memphis later on but wasn’t otherwise notable. We actually take a break and return with the Rockers making the comeback before Bruno runs in for the DQ. Seemed like an interesting enough big v. little match.

Over to World Class…

Red River Jack & The Dingo Warrior v. Bob Bradley & The Grappler

My god, I think a team of Bruiser Brody & Ultimate Warrior would have broken the universe. But here we are. Joined with Jack chopping Bradley down, but the heels cut off Warrior and Bob goes to a chinlock. Dingo fights out of that and it’s back to Red River Jack, who hits Bradley with a gigantic flying knee for the pin. That looked like it SUCKED.

Off to Deep South…

Tommy Rich v. Randy Rose

This was a loser gets 10 lashes match, and we’re joined with Rose having won the match and then proceeding to give Tommy the shots in the corner as promised. But after four of them, Rose wraps the strap around his wrist and knocks Rich out, prompting Rose’s buddies to all come in with belts and whip Tommy like a dog! Even announcer Nick Patrick, coming off career-ending knee surgery, tries to shield Rich from the beating, but they go after his bad knee and take him out. But then Assassin makes the save and they go “scurrying like a covey of quails” and I’m gonna have to work that one into my every day conversation more often. Afterwards, Assassin reveals that he wasn’t there to save Tommy Rich, he was there to save his SON, Nick Patrick, and now he’s coming after Randy Rose. This was a HELL of a deal.

Mat Classic : Dominic DeNucci & Eduardo Carpentier v. Al Costello & Ivan Kalmikoff

Back to the 50s for this one, in Montreal, and that ring is GIGANTIC. The babyfaces quickly win the first fall with an airplane spin from DeNucci and that’s where we leave off for the week.

And we wrap it up for the week with the Wrestler of the Week award, going to Hacksaw Jim Duggan for taking a stand against people from other countries celebrating their heritage on his time!

Well hopefully that Wrestlemania show can live up to the build.