The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling – 01.22.83

The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling – 01.22.83

Taped from Charlotte, NC

Your hosts is Bob Caudle

Sweet Brown Sugar & Mike Davis v. Masa Fuchi & Ken Timbs

We’re joined with this one in progress, with Davis dodging elbows from Timbs and then making the tag to Brown Sugar. Sugar hits Fuchi with dropkicks and cleans house with slams before doing a nice roll underneath him and finishing with a bodypress at 1:14 aired.

Dick Slater v. Vinnie Valentino

Slater quickly takes Vinnie down and works the leg, but Vinnie cradles for two. So Slater tosses him and puts the boots to him from the apron. I know this is a scorching hot take, but Slater’s mannerisms and movements are eerily similar to Jon Moxley’s at this point. Suplex back into the ring and he works the back like a neanderthal and then puts him in a Boston crab for the submission at 2:29.

Rick Steamboat & Jay Youngblood v. Jim Dalton & Frank Monte

Monte works on Steamboat’s arm but gets monkey-flipped for his troubles and retreats back to the corner again. Steamboat and Youngblood take turns putting him down with a headlock and Ricky cranks on that, but Monte reverses to a headscissors. Over to Dalton and Rick immediately takes him down and the babyfaces double-team Dalton in the corner. Finally we move past the headlocks and Dalton puts Jay down with a back elbow to take over. Youngblood with some chops on Monte and they give him a double chop in the corner before Steamboat drops knees on him for two. So Monte necks Steamboat on the top rope, but Dalton comes in and immediately walks into chops from Steamboat. Youngblood with the sleeper, but Monte breaks it up, so Jay slingshots Steamboat in with a bodypress on Dalton for the pin at 5:30.

One Man Gang BODY SLAM CHALLENGE

Oliver Humperdink has a big $5000, ironically at the exact same time that Flair was putting up his own $5000 over on Georgia TV, for anyone who can slam the Gang. So first up is Dizzy Ed Hogan, who tries but can’t get him up. You could say he CUT it close. Anyway he’s Brutus Beefcake. Next up, Jimmy Valiant gives it a try and gets nowhere, but then he wants MUSIC and gets himself all pumped up, at which point he does get Gang in the air, but Humperdink pushes them over and Gang falls on top, leaving Jimmy twitching as young Dizzy has to save.

Mike Rotundo, still the TV champion despite seemingly losing on TV every week, now wants a title shot at Ric Flair. Biting off a bit more than you can chew there, Irwin. You only just got past Leroy Brown after like 14 shots at it. As the song says, don’t go chasing waterfalls, stick to the rivers and lakes that you’re used to.

Mike Rotundo v. Bill White

Bob is pondering a kind of Schoedinger’s Cat situation with the Gang bodyslam challenge, as the slam exists in a state of happening and not happening at the same time based on our belief of whether Valiant could have pulled it off without the interference. This is deeper than your usual 80s wrestling commentary. Roddy Piper joins Bob at the desk and he’s not here to fight this week, he assures us. Not that he COULDN’T, but he just doesn’t have anyone who wants to fight him this week. Honestly that’s hard to believe. But he’s fine, his face is FINE, and he’s over the vicious attack from Greg Valentine and Ric Flair that ripped up his face and put him out of wrestling for a while. HE’S FINE. Mike works on White on the mat, but White slams out it. Rotundo throws forearms in the corner but Roddy wants more aggression from him. “Last time he broke on the ropes like he was Shirley Temple!” But then Mike turns it up and finishes with the aeroplane spin at 6:50.

Sgt. Slaughter & Don Kernodle are in another studio and want to know why Steamboat & Youngblood won’t come to face them despite all their challenges. Apparently you spell pain “SLAUGHTER AND KERNODLE”. Look I haven’t been in a whole lot of spelling bees but I’m pretty sure that’s not correct.

Dory Funk Jr. joins us and his hair is looking pretty ratchet if we’re being honest here, and he’s got his good friend Greg Valentine, the US champion, with him. Greg points out that guys like Piper like to brag but does he have any kind of belt? NO.

Roddy Piper joins us and apologizes for missing so much time, but Dick Slater quickly butts in and stands close despite Piper’s bad breath. Slater accidentally calls it “The Mid-South” and accuses Piper of having NO GUTS, and you don’t say that about Roddy, because he’s slap you silly. So they throw some impressively stiff shots at each other and Slater wants some RIGHT NOW, so Piper tears off his nice suit and the fight is on in the ring. They’re fighting like a couple of nerds going after the last pack of Pokemon Sparkling Diamond cards on release day, but all the of the dressing room is out to break them up and it pretty much takes 10 guys on each side to hold them down and keep them apart. And the brawl gets wilder as they keep escaping custody and attacking each other until finally we regain control.

Back from the break, Dick Slater is DISGUSTED that anyone would dare break up his fight, but now he’s got a persona vendetta with Piper, and he’s gonna be on Roddy like flies on a garbage can, even when Piper’s on the toilet. So he better watch out. But then Piper charges in and attacks from behind, and another wild pullapart brawl erupts and a bunch of babyfaces have to pull Piper off and carry him back to the dressing room.

So uh, I’d like to please purchase a ticket and see that wrestling match RIGHT NOW, thank you very much.

Jack & Gerry Brisco v. Ben Alexander & Ricky Harris

Gerry controls Alexander on the mat and it’s over to Harris, the future Black Bart, who sadly just passed away recently. The Briscos take turns working the leg and then run the jobbers together before Jack hits a butterfly suplex on Alexander for two. Not gonna lie, this match is having a hard time following that brawl. It takes a lot to make me care about Dick Slater. Back to Harris and they take turns working the leg, and Jack finishes with the figure-four at 5:45.

Jay Youngblood and Rick Steamboat are joined by the Briscos, as we drop another bit of foreshadowing and they talk about how the Briscos are spending so much time training with them and watching film to study them and help them improve. That is so awesome. I’m also pretty sure that was 100% a little easter egg for those who were paying attention later on. And then Roddy blows in and cuts a promo on Slater and then blows out again. Also someone MAY have taught them how to do the cobra clutch, and it might even be someone Slaughter knows! Yeah I think we can figure out who betrayed Slaughter and Kernodle and revealed their secrets. I’m sure they won’t keep that info PRIVATE, if you know what I mean.

GREAT SHOW this week.