The SmarK Rant for AEW Rampage – 05.01.24

The SmarK Rant for AEW Rampage – 05.01.24

On with the second part of the AEW wrestling block from Winnipeg!

Live from Winnipeg, MB

Your hosts are Excalibur, Daddy Magic & Tony Schiavone

We pick things up with Kenny Omega still in the ring, selling his diverticulitis. Maybe he had some bad ketchup chips or an expired Coffee Crisp? Well medical science is a mystery. And then before Kenny can even be loaded into an ambulance, the Elite attacks the EMTs and lays them out. Yeah that’s about normal for the Canadian medical system, not gonna lie. Frankly I’m surprised they could get an ambulance to show up without waiting for three hours.

Jay White v. Dante Martin

Dante slugs away on Jay in the corner and they fight to the floor, but White slugs away back in the ring. Dante takes him down again and Jay bails to escape, so Dante hits him with a dive and that almost went badly. Back in the ring, Dante tries a springboard and Jay trips him up into the top turnbuckle, and we take a break. Back with Jay working the chinlock, but Dante fights out with a dropkick and follows with a springboard bodypress for two. Jay with a uranage for two. They fight to the apron and Dante gets the springboard moonsault for two. White with the sleeper suplex and the Blade Runner finishes at 9:28. They meshed really well here, but the crowd is still dead. ***1/4. Afterwards, Jay helps him up and offers some respect, so the referee believes him and leaves, and then Jay turns on him with an implant DDT for good measure and then slinks away to the back. Ha!

Meanwhile, Deonna Purrazzo is sick of being nice and now it’s time to make things personal with Thunder Rosa.

Meanwhile, Rush would like us to put some respect on his name. Well hopefully he sticks around longer this time then.

Meanwhile, Big Bill knows that Chris Jericho is the guy to give him guidance under the Learning Tree. Jericho, still playing babyface, shows up and accepts Bill’s offer.

Meanwhile, Swerve Strickland wants another talk with Christian next week, and this time he won’t be alone.

Kyle O’Reilly v. Rocky Romero

They trade wristlocks to start and Rocky takes him down with a rana and goes for the armbar. Kyle reverses to an anklelock, but Rocky fights up and boots Kyle to the floor for a dive. Another one goes badly for him, as Kyle catches him in a suplex on the floor and goes to his own armbar as we take a break. Back with them trading kicks, but Kyle rebounds into the lariat for a double down. They fight to the top and Rocky brings him down with Sliced Bread #2 for two. Kyle kicks him down for two and jumps into the guillotine, but Rocky reverses to the armbar and cradles for two. Backslide gets two. He goes for the kimura, but Kyle reverses to a cradle for the pin at 9:35. Fun technical battle! ***

Meanwhile, Harley and Saraya make fun of Mariah May (aka Tiny Storm) and they don’t need to be told to keep their tits out.

Meanwhile, the Kingdom apparently will decide the future history of AEW after Double or Nothing.

TBS title, MANITOBA MASSACRE: Willow Nightingale v. Skye Blue

They brawl into the crowd right away and trade shots into the barricade, but Skye dives off the barricade and lands on a BRUTAL chairshot from Willow. Holy shit, that almost made contact! Another foot closer to Skye’s head and she might have a headache right now. Willow puts her on a chair and misses a dive onto that, and we take a break. Back with Skye bleeding, but Willow pounces her on the floor and we head back into the sea of chairs in the ring. Willow tries a cannonball in the corner, but Skye counters with a chairshot for two. So Skye finds the bag of thumbtacks under the ring and they fight for a powerbomb in the corner, but Willow takes her down with a fisherman’s buster onto the tacks for two instead. Back in the ring, Willow slams her on a chair and goes up for a moonsault, but that misses and she hits a chair instead. Next up, Skye finds the barbed wire board under the ring, but Willow powerbombs her off the table, through the barbed wire, and that finishes at 10:48. OK this was goofy as fuck but they were committed to it and it ruled as a result. ****

Luckily I had my DVR set for 30 minutes after the show because this had a huge overrun. This is exactly the sweet spot for Rampage, I think, with good midcard matches to focus on people, some storyline advancement with the interview segments, and a fun midcard title match in the main event.