The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 11.20.24

The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 11.20.24

We get some NOVEMBER RAIN to start the show, although here in Saskatchewan it’s nothing but NOVEMBER SNOW.

Also how did NO ONE bring a “Leaves IS Plants!” sign to the show tonight? I’m ashamed of you, Reading.

Live from Reading, PA

Your hosts are Excalibur, Tony Schiavone & Daddy Magic

Ricochet, Powerhouse Hobbs, Will Ospreay & Mark Davis v. Kyle Fletcher, Konosuke Takeshita, Lance Archer & Brian Cage

They do the big brawl to start and Ospreay tears off Fletcher’s fancy pants while Hobbs beats on Archer and chokes him out on the railing. Into the ring, Takeshita trades shots with Davis and Mark gets some offense in, and then Ricochet hits a dive onto Takeshita outside. Ospreay goes up but Fletcher beats him down to the floor, as this feud has some HEAT and will probably steal the show. Archer wrecks some guys on the floor, including going after Hobbs’ knee, but Ricochet escapes the Blackout in the ring and fights back on Archer. However, he ricochets off Archer and can’t get anywhere, getting caught and chokeslammed over the top rope and to the floor as we take a break. And Excalibur didn’t even get a chance to tell us that we’re sticking with it in picture-in-picture! So Hobbs has been hauled to the back to repair his knee, leaving the faces 4-on-3, but Ricochet comes back with a handspring elbow on Takeshita and dives for a hot tag to Ospreay. He slugs it out with Fletcher and Takeshita comes in, but Ospreay and Davis do some United Empire double-teams on him with a neckbreaker for two. Ospreay gets trapped in the heel corner and Fletcher puts the boots to him to take over, but Hobbs returns from the back and makes the save before getting the HOT HAND and cleaning house on one leg. And all four heels are left in the corners, so he hits them all with clotheslines and powerslams Archer. So then Davis comes in and holds his own with Takeshita, blocking the knee strike and hitting a gutwrench piledriver for two. This gives us the showdown with Kyle Fletcher and they slug it out, but Takeshita nails Davis to break that up. And then the big guys throw BOMBS on each other, leaving us with Ospreay and Fletcher for a showdown. They trade powerbomb attempts and Ospreay hits him with a Spanish fly, but accidentally hits Davis with a Hidden Blade and Takeshita finishes Davis with the knee strike at 14:40. This match RULED. ****

Meanwhile, the Death Riders are prepping Wheeler Yuta for war in the back of a truck, and Claudio is going to end Darby Allin.

Meanwhile, the Hurt Syndicate shows up, and MVP announces that Bobby Lashley will be in action tonight as a special treat to us. But then Swerve stops by and knocks him down with a chain.

Adam Cole joins us, but Kyle O’Reilly quickly interrupts and points out that the feud with MJF isn’t going anywhere except hurting all his friends and Adam himself.

Meanwhile, Orange Cassidy asks the Conglomeration to stay away and let him fight the battle alone tonight.

Kris Statlander v. Hikaru Shida

They trade takedown attempts and Shida hits her with a knee in the corner, so Kris SWEEPS THE LEG and hits a standing moonsault for two. Shida with a rana and Stat lands on her feet and goes to a surfboard. Shida reverses to a straitjacket and chokes her out in the corner to set up a missile dropkick and running knee on the apron as we take a break. Back with them slugging it out and Kris gets a powerslam and high knee in the corner, and a Michinoku driver gets two. Shida cradles for two and hits a knee strike, but she can’t pull the trigger on the Katana kick and Statlander powerslams her for two. Shida with a backslide for two and falcon arrow for two. High knee and german suplex, but she tries another katana and Statlander catches her and tombstones her for the pin at 9:27. They had some great chemistry together. ***1/4. This brings out Mercedes for some cheap sportsball heat, although really scoring off Philly’s sports teams is low hanging fruit. But then she sends Kamille (with broken arm) to attack, and that goes badly, allowing Statlander to lay Mercedes out with the piledriver.

Meanwhile, MVP and Shelton get their revenge on Swerve.

Bobby Lashley v. Joe Keys & Cheeseburger

Lashley quickly destroys both guys and throws them around the ring before tossing Keys and finishing Cheeseburger with the Dominator. Joe Keys actually makes the save, so Lashley flattens him and spears him and then puts him away with the Hurt Lock at 2:00. Prince Nana comes out for distraction, however, and Swerve pops out from under the ring and gets his revenge for the previous revenge.

Meanwhile, Mina and Mariah prepare for their champagne celebration at Full Gear. Luckily for them, Toni Storm has announced her retirement and we’ll never see her again.

Darby Allin v. Claudio Castagnoli

Darby psyches himself up and takes Claudio down with an armdrag before sending him to the floor to regroup. Darby tries to dive and Claudio catches him and tosses him into the railing like garbage and then smashes him with a forearm to send him flying into the crowd. Claudio calmly hoists him up with a delayed suplex and carries him into the ring like a complete freak of nature, and we take a break. Back with Claudio ragdolling him into the railing and back into the ring, but Darby traps him in the apron skirt and hits him with a pair of dives. Back in, Darby goes up and Claudio crotches him and brings him down with a gut wrench slam from the top for two. Claudio with the Giant Swing, but Darby reverses to a cradle for two and a Code Red for two. Darby gets to the apron and Claudio boots him to the floor and then swings him into the stairs, complete with one revolution to build up some momentum, and then tosses him into the announcers like a sack of garbage before clearing the table and hitting him with a press slam from one table to the timekeeper table in an insane spot. That table is a tough son of a bitch. Darby somehow beats the count at 9, so Claudio charges and destroys him with a lariat and pins him clean at 14:12. Claudio is insanely awesome and this was GREAT. ****

Meanwhile, Private Party discusses their strategy for the four-way, and we get a cameo from the Costco dorks. Although I love Costco we don’t even have the chicken bake thing or giant cookies here in Canada so I can’t really relate to them.

Meanwhile, MJF stops by Roderick Strong’s old trailer park, and apparently he’s going to beat Roddy so badly that Roddy will wish that his mother had shot him instead of his father. Harsh.

Meanwhile, AJ and Big Justice announce that the special timekeeper for their match will be none other than the Rizzler himself. Sadly I do know who all these people are and I apologize.

Roderick Strong and the Kingdom join Tony to tell off MJF and he’s going to BREAK MAX’S BACK AND LEAVE HIM HUMBLE.

Meanwhile, Daniel Garcia apparently tortures Jack Perry and then gets all frustrated and smashes up the magic bus instead.

Meanwhile, Chris Jericho goes to sign the contract with Ishii, but wants to have his legal eagles look it over first and walks away with it, prompting Ishii to stalk him through the arena like the Terminator while Jericho gets increasingly freaked out. So Jericho foolishly ends up in the ring, but he doesn’t have a pen. Ishii does, luckily, and Jericho signs it, just in time for the Learning Tree to attack. And the Conglomeration saves, presumably setting up a six-man sometime this week. This felt kinda predictable after the hilarious slow motion chase, but the buildup was enough to justify it.

Meanwhile, Jamie Hayter tries to do another promo after getting cut off by Julia Hart last week, and then Julia cuts her off again with another spooky video.

Orange Cassidy v. Wheeler Yuta

Orange gets a backslide for two and cradles for two, and then gets the Seat Belt for two. Stunner puts Yuta on the floor and he follows with a dive, but Yuta gives him a sick brainbuster onto the top of the railing and chokes him out on the turnbuckle bolt in the corner. They fight on the apron and Yuta hits him with a DDT on the apron, THE HARDEST PART OF THE RING, and we take a break. Back with them slugging it out, which Yuta wins with biting, but Orange puts him down with a high kick and PK. Brainbuster gets two. Yuta counters the Orange punch with a german suplex and hits him with a samoan drop before smashing him with elbows. Orange counters with SMALL JOINT MANIPULATION and a Michinoku driver for two. Yuta counters the Orange punch again and hits him with a tombstone for two. Yuta with the elbows again and Orange has no defense, so Yuta goes to the Cattle Mutilation and Orange has to make the ropes. So Yuta’s had enough and grabs a chair, but Orange rolls him up for the pin at 11:38. Find someone in your life to love you as much as Orange Cassidy loves winning via rollup! ***1/4. Afterwards, the Death Riders hit the ring and duct-tape Orange’s hands to his pockets before laying in the beating, but the Conglomeration finally makes the save and Orange gets to stand tall to end the show. I dunno, they’re making a real good case for Orange here but it still feels too soon to take the title off Mox unless they’re going another 50/50 deal like they did with the International title last year.

Really strong show this week that did the work and set up Full Gear like it needed to. I’m pretty pumped for that one now and I’ve got $100 on the Outrunners to back it up.