The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 06.26.24

The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 06.26.24

Live from Buffalo, NY

Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Excalibur & Taz

MJF joins us to start, but Daniel Garcia immediately interrupts for the hometown pop. And he’s here to do something really edgy: SAY NICE THINGS about MJF. The loss he took to MJF motivated him to come back stronger and now he wants to be the foundation of AEW. And if MJF talks shit about him now, he’ll just look really bad to Buffalo. MJF instead shills Forbidden Door (but gets the date wrong) and notes he’s wrestling a guy who looks like a badly drawn comic book character in the form of Hechicero. That’s a really random and worthless match to put on PPV, honestly. Max reminds us that he’s rich and young and good-looking, but he gave Garcia a title shot because he earned it and not because he’s a nepo baby or friends with the owner or whatever. So MJF offers Garcia a match at All In, but Will Ospreay interrupts and confronts Garcia about his International title challenge, and offers him a title shot next week, with both the International and World titles on the line since he’ll have both belts and all. But then MJF gets all upset about getting upstaged and seemingly withdraws his Wembley challenge. This was kind of a weirdly long opening segment that didn’t really feel like it was justified going that long.

Meanwhile, Swerve Strickland is annoyed by Ospreay offering title matches before he even has the belt.

The Blackpool Combat Club v. Titan, Shingo Takagi & Hiromu Takahashi

Claudio trades power shots with Takagi to start and then misses a blind charge, allowing Takagi to hiptoss him. Over to Yuta, but LIJ triple-teams him and tosses him for a dive from Titan. Back in the ring, Wheeler gets an enzuigiri, but Titan kicks Claudio down. He goes up and gets caught in a backbreaker, however, and we take a break. Back with everyone brawling on the floor, and the BCC cuts off Titan in the ring. He fights back with a kick after a Matrix dodge on Moxley, and brings in Takagi, who slugs away on Mox. He DDTs both Mox and Claudio and hits Yuta with a brainbuster. Mox comes back and they trade shots until Shingo puts him down with a lariat. Back to Yuta, who hits Takahashi with a german suplex, but Takahashi gets a death valley driver for two. And then Moxley hits him with a chair for the DQ at 11:00. This didn’t really do much for anyone. **3/4. This brings out Tetsuya Naito and he gets into a brawl with Moxley. And then Takagi destroys Yuta with elbows in the ring, so Bryan Danielson makes the save.

Owen Hart tournament first round: Jay White v. Rey Fenix

The ref decides to eject everyone from ringside before they even do anything, and Fenix rolls up Jay for two. They slug it out and White hits him with chops, but Fenix takes him down with a headscissors and puts him on the floor for a dive. He tries a moonsault and White trips him up on the apron, and back in for a neckbreaker that gets two as we take a break. Back with Fenix making a comeback with chops and a frog splash for two. Fenix with a rana for two. Jay hits him with a DDT and then follows with a brainbuster for two. Fenix counters the sleeper suplex into a rollup for two, but White gets the uranage for two. They trade counters, but it ends with the Blade Runner at 9:19 to send White to the semi-finals. Good but unremarkable. ***. This brings out Christian Cage and his family to stare them down and set up a Trios title feud.

Meanwhile, the Young Bucks have some BREAKING NEWS for us: They’re inserting their very own wild card into the Owen Hart tournament next week on behalf of the Elite.

The Acclaimed join us and they let us know that they’re getting the titles back from the “Young Cucks”, but they haven’t decided the right time to issue the challenge yet. This brings out the Elite to interrupt (“Scissor ME, bitch”) and they want a trios match for Forbidden Door, but Billy Gunn tags out and gives his spot to Hiroshi Tanahashi instead.

Meanwhile, we get Mark Briscoe’s weekly rant, but then Kyle O’Reilly steps in and does his own goofy promo. Zack Sabre Sr. won’t even recognize his son when Kyle is done with him!

Timeless Toni Storm, Mariah May & Mina Shirakawa v. Saraya, Harley Cameron & Anna Jay

Mariah & Mina certainly have the choreography down for their entrance. Anna beats on Mina to start, but Mina SWEEPS THE LEG and hits her with an enzuigiri out of the corner. Over to Mariah and she comes in for some double-teaming and boob-shaking with Mina, and then hits Harley with a sideslam. The heels take out Toni Storm outside and we take a break. Back with Toni getting a hot tag and cleaning house, but Harley hits Mina with a backstabber for two. It’s BREAKING LOOSE IN TULSA and Mina hits Harley with an inverted suplex for the pin at 7:41. But then things get too real as Mariah is dancing with Toni afterwards, and Mina tries to attack with a bottle of bubbly and accidentally smashes it on Mariah’s head instead. **

The Learning Tree joins us, and Big Bill is upset at being challenged to a six-man when Bryan Keith is injured at the hands of Shibata. So Jericho points out that he’s been to Japan more than 60 times, which is a lot, and introduces Minoru Suzuki as his partner. But it turns out he misinterpreted and Suzuki actually hates him and wants an FTW title match at Forbidden Door instead. And then Samoa Joe and his crew hit the ring for a brawl and send the heels running.

Zack Sabre Jr. v. Kyle O’Reilly

Orange Cassidy joins us on commentary, which finally gives Taz the chance to confront him about the Orange name. “You’d have to blame my mom, she named me that.” Can’t argue with that. They trade takedowns to start, which Orange finds interesting because he doesn’t know how to do those moves. They trade armbar attempts and Taz offers advice to Orange: If Zack tries an armbar, get out of it. Well said. Kyle counters a takedown into a choke, but Zack goes after the neck and we take a break. Back with them trading submission attempts and Kyle escapes from an anklelock and suplexes him. But they do a slugfest and Zack takes him down with a flying armbar and switches to a Fujiwara armbar, tapping him out at 11:10. Really good technical battle here. ***1/4. And then we get even more of the overloaded roster stuff, with the Kingdom trying to help Kyle afterwards, complete with new associate Gabe Kidd, but TMDK hits the ring and then Ishii comes out to save. They’re just throwing SO MANY PEOPLE at us and overloading the show with these storylines that are getting dropped right after the PPV anyway.

Swerve Strickland & Will Ospreay v. The Gates of Agony

Big brawl to start and Ospreay hits Kaun with a springboard elbow for one. Swerve and Ospreay have some miscommunication, allowing the Gates to double-team Swerve to take over. We take a break for a completely unnecessary overrun segment and return with the Gates having some problems, allowing Swerve a chance to make the hot tag to Ospreay. Shooting star on Kaun gets two. He goes up and Kaun brings him down with a jackhammer for two. Swerve gets rid of Liona outside and Ospreay teases the Tiger Driver on Kaun, but he hits Swerve by mistake and Liona gets a pounce on Ospreay for two. But then Swerve saves and allows Will to hit an Ozcutter on Toa for two. Hidden Blade finishes at 10:02. This was fine but hardly a main event match. **1/2. And then Swerve attacks Ospreay afterwards to pay him back for the earlier disrespect, ending this very by the numbers episode in a very by the numbers way.

I’m really looking forward to the main event on Sunday but everything else on this show just felt like Tony Khan throwing match after match onto the show and overstuffing things with all these guys who get about 3 seconds of introduction time and then get forgotten again. Like Hechicero is facing MJF and he didn’t even appear on the go-home show but we got Gabe Kidd randomly getting TV time with no introduction in a match with 17 other people involved. I wasn’t feeling this one at all and I don’t think it’s gonna help their ratings trouble this week, either.