The SmarK Rant for AEW Collision – 12.21.24

The SmarK Rant for AEW Collision – 12.21.24

Live from the Hammerstein Ballroom in New York, which looks AWESOME.

Your hosts are Ian Riccaboni and apparently the Costco dorks. Plus Tony Schiavone & Nigel McGuinness

Continental Classic Gold League: Will Ospreay v. Ricochet

The New York crowd throws streamers for Will, and then toilet paper for Ricochet, so I think the heel turn is taking already. They fight to a stalemate to start and trade headlocks, but Ricochet bails to the floor and Ospreay gives us a superhero pose. Back in, they trade acrobatics and Ric dumps him on the top rope and sends him to the floor, before following with a dive. And then he wipes his taint with the toilet paper and rubs it in Will’s face, which is truly for the sickos. Back in the ring, Ricochet with a slingshot senton for two and he goes to work on Ospreay’s neck and gets two. Dropkick gets one and Ricochet goes back to the neck again, but Ospreay comes back with a springboard forearm for two. Ricochet tries a rana and Will counters to a Styles Clash, but Ric reverses out and hits a double underhook powerbomb for two. But then Will hooks him in the Styles Clash on the second try and gets two after an awkward handspring from Ric. They head to the apron and Ricochet hits him with a death valley driver on the apron, THE HARDEST PART OF THE RING. Free idea: The Outrunners should do a death valley driver, but instead of abbreviating it as a DVD, they call it the VHS. Back in the ring, Ricochet with his inverted slam for two. Spirit Gun misses and Ospreay comes back with the stunner, but Ric counters an Ozcutter into his own Cutter. Spirit Gun is countered with the Hidden Blade and it’s a double down. So Ospreay tells Ric to stand and fight and they slug it out, but Ospreay goes for the Stormbreaker and Ricochet messes with the ref and bumps him. Ospreay hits the Stormbreaker for a visual pinfall and then goes up, but Ricochet shoves the ref into the ropes to crotch Will, and hits the Spirit Gun to finish at 14:29 and “earn” three points. Not liking this losing run for Ospreay, but the match was awesome. ****1/4. Sounds like Ricochet v. Okada in one semi-final and Fletcher v. Ospreay in the other based on where we are now, and then Okada over Fletcher in the finals.

Adam Cole joins us for a face to face with MJF, and Maxwell notes that Adam should be much more scared of spray tanning, or cracks in the floor. Or cavities, because his dentist is no longer seeing him. Oh TAG. Also just like his fragile ankle, every time he went for the AEW World title, he blew it. And then he laughs at his own joke like a true heel. Adam fires back with the hair surgery cracks and they argue about who turned on whom first, and MJF finally admits that he was gonna turn on Adam but didn’t get a chance. So Adam finally attacks him, but MJF’s private security pulls him off and Max gives him a kick in the nuts, before the Kingdom makes the save. This was better than recent weeks for them, but still came off like a pair of divorced spouses airing their dirty laundry at a party while everyone kind of awkwardly hangs out at the catering table waiting for them to finish and go home. JUST KISS ALREADY AND GET IT OVER WITH.

Meanwhile, Kris Statlander challenges Mercedes Mone to a rematch at World’s End.

Meanwhile, Orange Cassidy tells the other people in the World title match that they can remove Moxley from the match and then fight for the title themselves. Not sure about that one.

Kris Statlander v. Penelope Ford

Kris hits a delayed suplex to start, so delayed they should call it Chinese Democracy, and that gets two. They head to the top and Ford brings her down with a blockbuster for two. They head to the floor and Ford runs her into the apron and back in for two. The crowd is not super into this match to say the least. Lariat gets two. Ford goes to a surfboard, but Kris powers out of that, so Ford chokes her out on the ropes. Stat with the Blue Thunder Bomb for two. Penelope with a fisherman’s suplex for two. They do a nice pair of Matrix counters to each other and Penelope gets the poison rana for two. Moonsault misses and Kris hits her with a pair of german suplexes and finishes with the tombstone at 9:00. Not much heat but the match was solid enough. **1/2. This brings out Mercedes, who accepts the challenge for the PPV rematch. This brings up another annoyance with the booking for the past while, which is that we just had an angle on Rampage where Ford and new ally Harley Cameron acknowledge that they’re losing a bunch and decided to team up together to turn it around. And then, on the VERY NEXT SHOW, they just beat Ford clean again and move on. Like, you have all these women under contract who aren’t doing anything, why not just throw one of them out there to do a job if you need to give Statlander a win so badly? It’s very frustrating as a fan.

AJ & Big Justice join us to bring the Boom, but Chris Jericho interrupts and takes exception to them being in New York. Do they even have Costco in New York? Oh shit, Jericho even makes that joke, noting that they shop at bodegas in New York. But then Jericho goes to make fun of the Acclaimed in an off-hand remark, and Anthony Bowens storms down in a mood. So Big Bill drops some knowledge on us, drawing a babyface pop, but Bowens no-sells it and challenges Jericho to a fight. But of course Jericho declines, so Bowens settles for scissoring AJ instead. Yeah this all really sucked. If their big plan to push Bowens is to suck him into the Jericho Vortex for his first singles feud, he’s gonna be dead in the water already.

Meanwhile, the Vendetta meets Toni Storm, who apparently has a tattoo of a duck on her ankle! How would Deonna even KNOW that? Deonna isn’t buying into whatever she’s selling, so Taya challenges Toni to a match. I thought it was later tonight but didn’t happen, so I guess not. This storyline remains dumb but Toni is so incredibly committed to it that it works.

Continental Classic Blue League: Daniel Garcia v. Shelton Benjamin

They slug it out to start, but Shelton powers him up for a slam and then hits a few more. Shelton whips him into the corner and puts the boots to him and they fight to the floor, where Shelton runs him into the apron. Back in the ring, Garcia fights back with chops, so Shelton absorbs those and chops him down in return and then adds a giant backdrop. Shelton slugs away in the corner, but Danny slugs back until Shelton puts him down with a big boot for two. Shelton with a chinlock, but Garcia fights back with a dropkick and then Shelton drops him on his head with a german suplex. They head to the apron and tease a german suplex out there, but Garcia fights it off, so Shelton suplexes him on the floor instead. Garcia comes back and slugs on Shelton out there before dropkicking him off a chair. Shelton puts him down again, but the New York fans help him up again and he fights back in the ring. But Shelton hits him with another german suplex, so Garcia rolls him into the Dragon Tamer. Shelton powers out of that and turns it into his own STF. Garcia makes the ropes and cradles for two, but Shelton superkicks him right down again. That gets two as the crowd is right into Benjamin. Shelton picks him up to finish, but Garcia hits a jackknife cradle for the pin and 3 points at 12:18. ***1/4. Afterwards, the Hurt Business tries for the beatdown, but Mark Briscoe makes the save. This brings out security to break things up, but Swerve appears out of nowhere and hits the pile with a Swerve Stomp and throws out another challenge to Bobby Lashley.

Continental Classic Blue League: Mark Briscoe v. The Beast Mortos

They trade clotheslines to start and Mark beats on him with chops, but runs into a forearm. So he fires back with his own, but Mortos gets a backslide for two. Mark with a cradle for two. Mortos with a cradle for two. Nigel: “Mark should perhaps be wearing a mask.” Tony: “Why do you say these unkind things about people?” Nigel: “Because he can’t hear me.” Mark goes to the leg, but Mortos spears him to come back and hits him with a dropkick in the corner for two. Mortos with a chinlock and he smacks Mark around in the corner while Nigel sings “All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth” at Briscoe and cracks up Tony. Mortos beats on Mark with headbutts in the corner and sets up a running knee, but that misses and he goes flying to the floor. Mark hits him with a dive to make the comeback and fights back with kung fu on the apron and then a german suplex as well. Briscoe asks for the countout, but then changes his mind and dives onto Mortos again and then sets up a chair and dives onto him a third time. Back in the ring, Mark drops the froggy bow, but Mortos gets the knees up and hits him with a backbreaker. Powerbomb on the knee sets up the lariat, but Mark ducks it, so Mortos hits the samoan drop for two. Mortos goes for another powerbomb, but Mark reverses out and hits a death valley driver. Back to the top for another froggy bow, which gets two. So Mark goes up again, but Mortos RAWRS at him, so he hits a Jay Driller to finish at 11:36 instead for the 3 points. This match fucking RULED. ****. So Briscoe is done with 9 points, and Mortos finishes with zero.

Meanwhile, Julia Hart finally sets a date for the match with Jamie Hayter, which will be Fight for the Fallen.

Meanwhile, Mariah May wants to be Thunder Rosa’s new mommy, which upsets Rosa for some reason and triggers a brawl. Women, am I right? Not sure why we’re suddenly supposed to care about Papa Rosa being at ringside for the match.

Continental Classic Gold League: Darby Allin v. Claudio Castagnoli

Darby attacks on the floor and they brawl to the entrance, where Darby dives off the scaffold. Into the ring, Claudio hits him with the uppercut for two. Giant Swing and Claudio goes higher than the crowd can count and sends Darby to the floor off that. He picks up Darby like a child and drops him on the railing and then beats him down with chops. Back in the ring, Claudio stomps the fingers and they trade forearms, but Darby sends him to the floor and hits him with a dive. Claudio escapes to the other side of the ring, so Darby hits him with another dive and follows with a coffin drop to the floor. Darby with a sleeper out there, but Claudio slams him through a table to escape. Back in, Darby gets a pair of cradles for two, but Claudio hits him with a double stomp and then slams him back to the floor again. Darby is still moving, so Claudio gives him a Swing into the stairs, and then back in for a lariat that gets two. Claudio with a powerbomb, but Darby reverses to a sunset flip for two. They fight to the top, where Darby brings him down with a Scorpion Deathdrop. Coffin drop misses and Claudio powerbombs him for two. Another powerbomb gets two. Claudio goes under the ring for a chair and also finds brass knuckles, and that’s enough to finish Darby at 11:20 and give him 9 points. ***1/4 I don’t think I would have booked Darby to do a job right after the awesome match with Ospreay like that. Overall there’s just too much parity booking in this tournament. It doesn’t feel like anything has been accomplished over the course of it, aside from eliminating Mortos and Komander a week into the thing. Also two matches on the same show with blatant cheating in what’s supposed to be a “clean” tournament is also a bit much.

Overall, good wrestling on the show and I loved the setup of the Hammerstein, but the booking was a bit suspect and I didn’t really need multiple segments with the Costco Guys. A fun show but not one you need to go out of your way to see, for me.