The SmarK Rant for AEW Collision – 12.14.24

The SmarK Rant for AEW Collision – 12.14.24

Time for the other half of the Saturday double-header.

Taped from St. Louis, MO

Your hosts are Tony Schiavone & Nigel McGuinness

“WINTER IS COMING…AGAIN.”

Last week, after Dynamite, Will Ospreay confronts Darby Allin and Darby wants to go hunt down the Death Riders, but Will’s got a lot going on right now and has to beat everyone in the tournament first. Darby’s worried that there might not even be a Continental Classic next year! That’s silly talk, there’s always gonna be tournaments in AEW.

Also Okada calls the Beast Mortos, the BITCH Mortos, which seems like a really bad idea.

Jamie Hayter v. Willow Nightingale

Winner goes to Wrestle Dynasty in January. They trade headlocks to start and Hayter can’t overpower Willow and then gets put down as a result. She gets a cradle for two and tries a backslide, but Willow gets her own for two. Willow holds on and flips her over out of that, but Hayter cradles her for two and they get all pissed off and chop each other right in the boobs. Women, am I right, fellas? Jamie fires back with forearm shots, but Willow backdrops her to the apron, so Jamie hits Willow with a DDT out there on the HARDEST PART OF THE RING. But then the lights go out and distract her long enough for Willow to hit a cannonball off the apron as we take a break. Back with Hayter bringing Willow in with a superplex and a shining wizard for two. Neckbreaker and seated lariat get two. They slug it out again and Hayter gets an enzuigiri, but they each throw a pump kick and it’s a double down. Willow up first with a torture rack drop and a quebrada (!), which gets two. That’s a new one. Willow goes up for more moonsaulting, but Hayter brings her down with a german suplex, and Willow pops up with a pounce. Hayter reverses the Doctor bomb into a cradle for two and fires up again, but Willow ducks the Hayterade and powerbombs her for the pin at 12:35 to advance. Hell of an opener and they had great chemistry. Obviously Willow going to Japan is the right call as well. ***1/2. And after the match it’s more spooky darkness, as Julia Hart appears and DDTs Jamie. So I guess the darkness won out after those vignettes.

Meanwhile, Brody King calls Ricochet a COWARD for his questionable win on Dynamite.

Continental Classic, Blue League: The Beast Mortos v. Kazuchika Okada

They battle for the lockup and Okada gives a clean break, but Mortos gives a RAWR break. So Okada grabs him by the hair and gets a cheapshot, and Mortos boots him down and beats on him in the corner. They brawl to the floor and we take a break. Back with the Beast hitting a tilt a whirl backbreaker, but Okada gets up, so Beast does it again and adds an Argentine backbreaker for two. Okada puts him down again and the crowd really wants Mortos to get up again, but Okada tries for a neck vice and Mortos hurls him off. They slug it out and Okada slams him and goes up for the flying elbow, but Mortos ducks the Rainmaker and makes the comeback. Pop up samoan drop gets two. Mortos goes up and misses a senton, and then misses a charge, allowing Okada to hit him with the Okada Dropkick. But then Mortos no-sells that and Okada doesn’t know what to do with that. So he hits a lariat and then follows with the Rainmaker and pins him at 13:00 to get the 3 points and get the hell out of there. You wouldn’t think they’d mesh that well but they did. Also a neat story with Okada messing with the Beast’s mask and throwing him off his game enough to beat him. ***1/4

Toni Storm v. Shazza McKenzie

Shazza is probably most notable for having a match with Sean Ross Sapp a year or so ago. She gets a backslide on Toni for one, but Toni hits her with a german suplex and follows with the hip attack and Storm Zero to finish at 1:46. Afterwards, Toni announces that she is officially ALL ELITE, so it appears that the theories about her having amnesia caused by a psychotic break are indeed true. Or maybe she’s ACTING.

Meanwhile, Mariah May doesn’t give a fuck about Toni Storm and apparently she’s facing Thunder Rosa at World’s End for reasons that don’t really make any sense. Like, no wonder she’s so bitter at everyone in the division.

Meanwhile, Toni Storm introduces herself to Thunder Rosa and Tony Schiavone.

Top Flight v. Lio Rush & Action Andretti

Speaking of things that don’t make sense, neither one of these teams wins matches, and in fact Rush & Andretti have never won a match period, but the winner gets a title shot at Private Party. Dante gets a pair of cradles on Lio right away, and Action comes in and trades headlocks with Darius. They exchange takedowns and near-falls and battle to a stalemate off that. Lio comes in and Top Flight tries to double-team him, but it backfires and the heels send them to the floor as we take a break. Back with Dante diving over Andretti and making a hot tag to Darius, who runs wild on Rush and then hits Andretti with a flatliner. Top Flight does a crazy reversal sequence with Rush, alternating leapfrogs over him into a tornado DDT for two. But then Rush and Action double-team Darius with a striking series and a double suplex for two. Another try and Dante saves, but Rush hits him with a lariat and Andretti superkicks Darius to the floor and follows with a springboard moonsault. But then Dante hits him with a dive, only to accidentally hit Leila Gray on the rebound. So Rush and Action attack while Top Flight is tending to her, and double-team Darius in the ring before finishing with Action’s 450 at 10:50. Hey, Leilia’s a professional, if she can’t take a bump, stay in the dressing room. This delivered all the crazy acrobatic action you’d expect, but the crowd wasn’t buying into either team from the sounds of it. ***

Kris Statlander v. Tootie Lynn

I don’t like Tootie’s chances here. Stat quickly hits her with a delayed suplex, so delayed they should call it Trudeau’s $250 cheque, but Tootie fights back. So Kris tries a powerbomb, but Tootie reverses to a rana. So Kris has had enough and piledrives her for the pin at 1:51.

Meanwhile, Dustin Rhodes threatens Dutch & Vincent ahead of Final Battle. I’m assuming he must have re-signed by now, despite Kevin Owens wearing a Goldust shirt on SNME.

Meanwhile, Dynamite starts streaming on MAX on January 1, which means nothing outside of the US, but good for them.

Orange Cassidy, The Outrunners, Daniel Garcia & Komander v. MxM Collection, Josh Woods, Tony Nese & Ari Daivari

Woods manhandles Garcia to start. (Daddy Magic: “Look at Josh Woods!” Nigel: “It’s hard NOT to look at Josh in those shorts, good lord.”) Woods dances at Daniel one time too many and gets taken down as a result, and Nese comes in to try. Orange Cassidy beats on him in the corner and follows with the stunner, and Komander goes to the top but gets crotched by Madden. Mansoor comes in for the double-team and they strike a pose as we take a break. Back with the Athletes clearing the ring, and Komander goes after Smart Mark Sterling and gets attacked as a result. Everyone brawls and Orange hits Madden with the swinging DDT and dives onto Mansoor outside, which sets up Komander for a dive onto the pile off a ropewalk. Back in the ring, Orange hits Sterling with an Orange Punch, and then another one on Josh Woods for the pin at 8:38. Yup, Orange + Outrunners = PARTY MATCH. **1/2

Meanwhile, Don Callis complains about getting betrayed by Powerhouse Hobbs & Mark Davis, but Hobbs will be facing Takeshita at World’s End and will get revenge on his behalf. I think Don is actually putting something on his scar to make it bigger and redder.

Continental Classic Blue League: Mark Briscoe v. Kyle Fletcher

I’m still kind of shooken by “Fletchlights” entering into the vernacular on Dynamite. Kyle works on the arm to start while Nigel blows on Don Callis’s trumpet on commentary and Don LOVES it. Kyle grabs a headlock, but Mark threatens some Redneck Kung Fu, so Kyle has no choice but to slow down the Briscoe train and take him down with another headlock. They slug it out and Mark wins that battle and bites him on the apron, before following with a baseball slide and a cannonball to the floor. Fletcher hits him with a running knee and they trade shots on the floor, but Briscoe hits him with a blockbuster off the apron and then drops an elbow on him. They fight to the announce table and Mark tries a Jay Driller over there, but Kyle fights out of that and suplexes him onto the railing and into the crowd. Fletcher hits him with a dive over the railing, but Mark fights back with a suplex off the apron and into ringside as we take a break. Back with Fletcher in control in the ring, but Briscoe fights back with chops and a corner clothesline to set up an exploder. Kyle escapes the fisherman’s buster, so Mark hits him with a Pele kick and hits the buster on the second try, for two. Kyle snaps off a half and half suplex, but walks into a lariat and Briscoe puts him down with a death valley driver and goes to the top. Kyle cuts him off and tries the brainbuster, but Mark fights back with the froggy bow, landing on the knees. So Fletcher goes up again and tries his own elbow, which misses, and Briscoe gets two. Fletcher escapes the Driller, and hits a Michinoku Driver for two. Fletcher with a piledriver, but Briscoe flips out of that and puts him down with KUNG FU and tries for the burning hammer. Fletcher rakes the face and cradles for two, but he’s using the ropes and the ref breaks it up. So Briscoe cradles for two and tries the Driller, but Kyle reverses to the brainbuster for two. Briscoe goes up and Kyle hits him with a running boot and brings him down with a superplex, but Briscoe lands on his feet and hits the burning hammer for a double down. Kyle rolls out of the ring to escape the pin, so Mark drops a froggy bow on the floor and back in for another one, which gets two with one minute left. Jay Driller is reversed to a cradle by Kyle for two. Another one hits, however, and Briscoe gets the 3 points at 19:50 by the skin of whatever is left of his teeth. So glad to see Briscoe competitive this year. I believe the kids would call this a “banger”. ****1/4. And with only the Beast Mortos left to face, Briscoe looks good to finish with 9 points this year.

I liked this one better than Dynamite due to the lack of Adam Cole and a better main event, but I think Saturday Night’s Main Event was an easier watch overall, so we’ll just go with an overall rating of “Wrestling is awesome” and then everyone will be in agreement and happy.