The SmarK Rant for AEW Collision – 03.08.25

The SmarK Rant for AEW Collision – 03.08.25

Taped from Sacramento, CA

Your hosts are Tony Schiavone & Nigel McGuinness

Hook (with TOWEL!), Katsuyori Shibata & Samoa Joe v. Jack Banning, Starboy Charlie & Titus Alexander

Not liking the chances of that other team. Starboy is wearing what appears to be cutoff overalls and I’m assuming he’s doing some kind of weird tribute to the Weeknd? I mean it is a Saturday. He gets smashed by the Opps and then it’s over to Alexander, who gets chopped to oblivion by Joe and slugged into the corner. They all wallop Alexander with splashes in the corner and Shibata adds a dropkick, into the senton from Joe and a PK to finish at 2:15.

Meanwhile, COPE lets us know he’s not the guy who talks in complicated word salad and he’s just gonna have to destroy Mox because this could be his last World title shot. I’m actually kind of worried that they’re gonna be so determined to outshine the undercard that Copeland is gonna jump off the top of the Khan Tron or something.

Serena Deeb v. Momo Watanabe

Seems a little late to finally debut Momo on AEW TV before the title match but the match is pretty far down the card anyway. Deeb works the arm to start and they trade takedowns on the mat and battle to a stalemate. Deeb with a submission on the mat and dropkicks Momo into the corner and we take a break. Back with Momo getting a backslide for two and she kicks Deeb down and follows with rolling suplexes. PK gets two. Deeb comes back with the Octopus hold, but Momo reverses out with a snap suplex for two. Meanwhile Billie Saintz watches from the back and Deeb gets a german suplex to put her down. Hammerlock lariat gets two. I should note that they’re doing a lot of plugs for the PPV on Prime, but I couldn’t find it on the front page at all and had to go searching for it. But at least it’s there. Momo with double knees for two, but Deeb rolls into the half crab. Momo escapes that and finishes with a bridging german suplex at 10:30. This definitely didn’t make me want to see the match with Mercedes to any great degree, but Deeb is a black hole of heat anyway. Afterwards, Mercedes goes to confront Momo, but she ends up taking a meteora instead. **1/2

Meanwhile, Will Ospreay nurses his shoulder injury and reflects on his long and winding relationship with Kyle Fletcher. He’s a wounded animal, bruv! Kyle was his bruv, bruv!

Harley Cameron v. Tatevik Hunanyun

Tatevik attacks and puts the boots to Harley and then does a pointless flip over Harley before taking her down with a Trumpian legsweep. Harley makes the comeback and hits Yer a Shining Wizard, Harley and finishes with HER FINISHING MOVE at 2:08. “I’m just here for Harley Cameron” notes a sign behind her. You speak for many people, my friend.

Meanwhile, Kyle Fletcher loves dropping people on their heads and working out, and Ospreay is just an obstacle in his way to the top.

The Infantry v. Roderick Strong & Kyle O’Reilly

Bravo runs his mouth at Kyle and gets chopped by the Kingdom for it, and Kyle suplexes him for two. Over to Dean, as the Infantry traps O’Reilly in the corner and double-teams him for two. We take a break and return with Strong getting double-teamed with a flying splash from Dean, and that gets two. Hot tag O’Reilly and he puts Bravo into an anklelock, but Dean breaks it up with a sleeper. Kyle gets rid of him and guillotines Bravo, but Dean breaks that up as well. Roddy dumps him and they finish Bravo with SWEEP THE LEG at 8:18. Big chunk of this one took place during the break. Rest seemed OK. **1/4

Meanwhile, Callis declares Takeshita the new God of Pro Wrestling, although he does make sure to note that he doesn’t wish any ill health on Kenny Omega before then gloating about Kenny being in the hospital near death with tubes in his guts. Amazing.

Meanwhile, the Learning Tree messes with the Space Cowboys and now they’re gonna have a match at the PPV. On Zero Hour I’d assume.

Meanwhile, Jon Moxley talks about COPE’s dream to be World champion again, and he just doesn’t get what Copeland is about, man.

Dralistico v. Hologram

We get a gymnastics battle to start and Dralistico puts him down with kicks and then goes for the mask, but Hologram tosses him and hits a CRAZY tope suicida into the railing. Back in the ring, Dralistico snaps off a rana to put him on the floor and follows with his own dive before running him into the table. Back in the ring, Dralistico with a slingshot senton for two. Corner splash and he follows with a superkick as we take a break. Back with Hologram hitting a moonsault to the floor and back to the apron for a chop battle that turns into a superkick from Hologram. But then Dralistico hits him with a rana off the apron in another crazy bump. They trade chops on the floor, and also Aubrey counting them out in Spanish is adorable. I actually remember her starting the language quest a few years ago on Twitter. Back in the ring, Dralistico with the flying codebreaker for two. Hologram comes back with a powerbomb for two, really smashing him with it. Dralistico fights back with a spinning kick, but Hologram gets the Spanish fly, only for Dralistico to put him down with a crucifix bomb for a double down. Hologram comes back first and goes up for a bodypress that misses, and Dralistico hits a destroyer and uses the ropes for one. Aubrey catches him, and Hologram cradles for two and hits a spinning torture rack bomb to finish at 13:00. Holy hell what a match this was. **** Mortos hits the ring and attacks, but Komander quickly makes the save, and then LFI teams up to lay them out and win the day. Oh we gotta see that match soon I hope. Also Mortos get BOOED here, so you know people love Hologram.

Meanwhile, FTR apologizes to the Kingdom for their conduct last week, but Dax is less apologetic than Cash, and so we get a rematch next week. Also, Adam Cole wants a rematch with Danny Garcia.

Meanwhile, the Hurt Syndicate isn’t particularly entertained by the Outrunners, because they’re the underdogs and the champs are the top dogs.

The Premier Athletes v. The Outrunners

Tony Nese’s abs are weak and flabby compared to the Runners, who are so cut up that they can probably grate cheese on their six packs for the salad in catering. Truth slugs Nese down and Turbo comes in with a delayed suplex, so delayed they should call it the Outrunners’ PWI Rookies of the Year award, but Magnum gets caught in the Athlete corner and worked over. But then Sterling slaps Magnum around and awakens the beast, and it’s hot tag Turbo. DOUBLE HIPTOSS! DOUBLE ATOMIC DROPS! DOUBLE DROPKICKS! We get a double pose as we take a double break. Back with the Athletes cutting off the ring and Daivari hits a flying splash on Truth for two. But it’s hot tag Turbo and he’s a HOUSE OF FIRE as we’re BONZO GONZO and the they drop the double elbow. But this time the Hurt Syndicate’s music interrupts them and Nese gets the distraction rollup on Turbo for two. But then Turbo comes back again and the Total Recall finishes at 8:33 because they’re at least smart enough not to fall for that one. Also they didn’t have music distraction finishes in 1984.

Meanwhile, at the Queen of the Ring premiere, Mariah May attacks Toni Storm on the red carpet.

Meanwhile, we get a GREAT MJF-Hangman video package as we run down the PPV card. That match is gonna steal the show as long they don’t have to follow the Outrunners.

TNT title: Daniel Garcia v. Lee Moriarty

They trade takedowns to start and fight to the floor, where Garcia runs him into the railing and hits him with a dropkick as we take a break. Back with Moriarty holding him in a stretch, but Garcia makes the ropes and Moriarty puts him down again. Garcia rolls him up for two, but Lee gets a crossbody for two. They fight for the suplex and Danny wins that one and comes back with a dropkick before slugging away in the corner. Neckbreaker gets two. Moriarty blocks a piledriver and so Garcia hits a Saito suplex instead. To the top and Garcia brings him down with a superplex, but he tries to roll into a piledriver and Moriarty spins him into a Michinoku Driver for two. Garcia fires back with a spinning lariat but Moriarty gets the jackknife cradle for two. Garcia turns that into a backslide for two and they trade cradles for multiple two counts and it’s a double down off a collision. They slug it out and Moriarty wins that one and turns it into the Border City Stretch, but Garcia rolls him into the Dragon Tamer and Lee has to rake the eyes and reverses to the Stretch again. Garcia rolls out and into the piledriver, and that gets the pin to retain at 15:00. Hell of a main event. ****

And then Kenny Omega does the go-home promo for Takeshita and by god I’m pumped for this show tomorrow.

Didn’t look like much going in but that second hour was some great pro graps and they did a great job of hyping the PPV.