The SmarK Rant for AEW Collision – 01.27.24

The SmarK Rant for AEW Collision – 01.27.24

Live from Bossier City, LA

Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Nigel McGuinness & Kevin Kelly

Jon Moxley & Claudio Castagnoli v. Shane Taylor & Lee Moriarty

The brawl begins on the floor right away and the BCC get some punishment out there. Into the ring and Shane beats on Moxley, but Claudio comes in and isn’t taking crap. So they trade forearms and Claudio hits him with a short arm lariat but can’t get the Giant Swing. So they head to the floor and Moxley gets the worst of that via the railing as the announcers bust on Rick Knox for just letting it all happen. It’s true, referees are the WORST. Back in the ring, STP double-teams Claudio and Moriarty works the arm. Taylor with a slam and legdrop for two, brother. They fight over a suplex and Claudio powers up SHANE TAYLOR and makes the hot tag to Moxley. Jon comes in and makes the comeback with one injured hand, and drops Moriarty with the suplex slam before slugging away in the corner. Moriarty goes up for a dropkick, but Claudio catches him on the way down and swings him. Shane Taylor saves and slugs it out with Claudio some more and Nigel is pretty sure he can’t swing Shane Taylor. Oh I don’t know about that. Claudio wins the slugfest and clotheslines him to the floor, but Moriarty rolls up Moxley and gets a European clutch for two. Moxley pops up with a cutter, but it’s back to Shane. So the BCC hits him with a Hart Attack and Claudio nails Lee with a forearm to put him out. Moxley with the stomps on Shane and he goes to the choke, but Shane fights up from that. So Moxley squeezes him tighter and Taylor is out at 9:57. THIS MATCH FUCKING RULED. Loved all of this and the crowd was super hot. ****

Meanwhile, the Undisputed Kingdom offer some advice to Komander and promise to help him become champion so Roddy can beat him later on.

AEW International title: Orange Cassidy v. Komander

Komander offers a handshake and Orange is bemused and then trades wacky rollups on the mat with him. Orange tries for the pockets and Komander stops that, and they do a Gory Special reversal before Orange gets the pockets to break free. Orange takes him down with a headscissors, but Komander dodges the dive and we get a stalemate in the ring. Stunner and tornado DDT from Orange as the Kingdom joins us and we take a break. Back with Komander hitting a bodypress on Orange for two and a tornado DDT. They trade superkicks and Orange stomps him down in the corner, but Komander comes back with a Panama Sunrise and lungblower for two. Komander goes up with a frog splash for two. Komander tries a tombstone and Orange rolls him up for two, and then Komander walks into a Beach Break for two. Orange to the top and he goes his own ropewalk, but Komander takes him down with a rana and then hits another one for two. Orange bails to the floor, so Komander goes the ropewalk moonsault dive, but he takes out the Kingdom instead, and Orange finishes with the Orange Punch at 12:44. Fun match but not great or anything. **3/4

Meanwhile, Daniel Garcia gets beat up by unknown assailants.

Meanwhile, Toni Storm is unable to attend Mariah May’s match tonight because she’s unwelcome in Bossier City due to unpleasantness with racehorses.

Mariah May v. Lady Frost

They slug it out and trade chops in the corner, and Frost gets a flipping neckbreaker for two. So May hits her with a shotgun dropkick and we take a break. Back with May throwing more chops, but Frost rolls her up for two. They trade german suplexes and Frost hits the Chiller Driller for two, but May goes up with a missile dropkick. She misses a charge and Frost hits a handspring cannonball and looks to finish, but she goes up and May cuts her off and finishes with the Mayday slam at 7:15. Man they both looked like stars here, although the match was the usual “4 minutes of action wrapped around 3 minutes of commercials” for the division. **1/2

Meanwhile, Swerve announces that he’s sending Toa Liona against Page on Wednesday. And then Hangman chooses to keep his choice a secret for “the whole f’n show”. Those are some pretty lame choices on both sides.

Eddie Kingston v. Willie Mack

Non-title match here. Mack charges in and hits Eddie with a brainbuster for two right away. Mack with a cannonball in the corner and he follows with a standing moonsault for two. Eddie beats him down with chops and kicks to come back while Nigel imagines how a conversation between Bryan Danielson and the disciplinary committee might go. Mack tries a standing shooting star and lands on his own head, ending with a senton of sorts instead. And then he misses a cannonball and Eddie comes back with the exploder for two. Mack with a powerbomb for two and they exchange chops and then enuzigiris and Mack gets the stunner, but he misses the frog splash. And Eddie puts him away with the backfist at 6:04. Never been a big fan of Willie Mack and this wasn’t a really impressive showing for him either. **1/2.

Bryan Danielson v. Yuji Nagata

Bryan just blows right by Eddie on the way in and ignores him, and that angers Kingston for some reason. They fight for the wristlock and Bryan takes him down while the announcers do a good job of running down all of Nagata’s credentials. Nigel: “The closest thing that Bryan got to being a real fighter was braiding his hair”. Even Kingston cracks up at that one. Bryan with a DDT for two and he floats right into an armbar attempt, but Nagata makes the ropes. The crowd is FIRED UP here and they fight for the knucklelock to egg them on, until Yuji takes out the arm and puts the boots to him. We take a break and return with Nagata continuing to work on the arm, but Bryan dropkicks the knee and goes to work with kicks in the corner. Kingston on commentary notes that Bryan has failed to get inside his head and then goes on a rant for a minute on how un-bothered he is by Bryan. Clearly. Bryan takes Nagata down and wraps the knee around the post and then goes up with a missile dropkick for two. Bryan with the elbows, but Nagata catches the arm and hits him with an exploder. They trade forearms and Nagata takes him down with a crossface, which Bryan reverses to a kneebar. They slug it out and Nagata hits him with a boot in the corner and sets him up for a superplex, but Bryan fights back with headbutts and Yuji won’t go down. Nagata gets the superplex for two off that and crossfaces him, and then gets the Fujiwara armbar, but Bryan makes the ropes. “The true best technical wrestler in the world would have escaped!” notes Nigel. Bryan fights back with kicks to the knee again and takes Nagata down with a dragon screw, but they trade kicks with FIGHTING SPIRIT. Bryan with a headkick and Nagata finally goes down, and Bryan finishes with the knee at 15:19. Holy shit this was awesome. Where did THIS come from? ****1/4

Meanwhile, Mark Briscoe offers his services to FTR if Daniel Garcia can’t make the cage match tonight.

Meanwhile, Brian Cage is sick of hearing about Hook, who is the size of Brian’s leg. The smaller one. And then Hook stops by and steals his line.

Serena Deeb v. Robyn Renegade

Deeb takes her down with a headlock and they trade full nelsons before colliding with a double clothesline. Deeb hits her with a neckbreaker in the ropes and back in for another neckbreaker before finishing with the Deebtox and Serenity Lock at 2:55. Decent squash for Deeb but she’s always been kind of a blah character with the “professor” stuff.

Elimination cage match: FTR & Daniel Garcia v. The House of Black

Mark Briscoe comes out on behalf of Daniel, but the House takes him out and we start the brawl 3-on-2. But then Garcia fights out with a bandaged head while everyone brawls on the floor before even making it into the cage. And the poor guy gets backdropped on the ramp and dragged into the cage by Brody as we start for real. The House triple-teams Garcia, but Cash comes in with a dive off the top of the cage and takes everyone out as we take a break. Back with Dax and Malakai trading kicks, but Dax hits the spinebuster. Brody with the Bossman slam on Cash. Garcia gets tossed into the cage headfirst, leaving everyone laid out, and the House decides to climb out triumphantly, but FTR makes the comeback and stops them. The babyfaces are ready to leave, but Daniel wants more punishment for the House, so FTR hits Malakai with a Shatter Machine and they smash Brody into the cage a bunch of times. Buddy tries to curb stomp Cash, but he gets his own, and then Dax hits Black with a brainbuster and everyone is out. But Dax and Brody fight to the top and crash down, before Dax gets sent outside and Brody follows via the door, eliminating them both as we take another break. Back with Wheeler and Garcia double-teaming Black with splashes before Buddy gets his own splash on them and everyone is out. Cash and Buddy fight up the cage and Cash gets crotched. They fight to the top of the cage and hang off the side, with Cash falling off through a table we had all forgotten about. But then Black orders Buddy back into the cage, so Garcia runs Black into Buddy and puts HIM through a table. So that leaves Daniel Garcia and Malakai Black, and Daniel takes him down and anklelocks him. Black fights out of that and kicks him down for the double down. But then Julia Hart joins us and sprays the black mist at Garcia, which leaves Black free to leave. Garcia wants more, however, and Black obliges, but Garcia ducks the Black Mass kick and piledrives him on a chair and does the climb. Black goes for the door, but Mark Briscoe returns and slams the door in Black’s face, and Daniel drops down to win the match at 23:04. This was unbelievably great old school territory cage match that made Garcia look like the biggest babyface in the world. ****1/2

HOT DAMN WHAT A SHOW. Absolutely check this one out, it cooked the Rumble and was two hours shorter as a bonus.