The SmarK DVD Rant for The Best of RAW 2010

So yeah, this one’s been sitting on my review pile for a while now. Given I watched almost none of the show for the year, I figured it would be a nice catch-up for me. What is the deal with the continued false advertising on the DVD boxes, though? When each disc is 2 hours long, that’s not “Approximately 9 hours” unless you’re really bad at math.

Hosted by Michael Cole & Jerry Lawler. Take a drink every time you hear “vintage” or “Longest running weekly episodic television program in history!”

Disc One

January 4: Bret Hart returns to guest host the show, and he’s immediately spewing the “WWE Universe” jargon we’re all sick of. He calls out Shawn Michaels to confront him, and they have what is a pretty dull confrontation for two guys who wanted to kill each other just 12 years before. So they hug and you can hear the sound of money getting flushed down the toilet. Oh well, at least we got that, um, awesome Vince v. Bret showdown at Wrestlemania instead.

January 4: WWE tag titles: D-Generation X v. Jeri-Show

DX tries a double suplex on Show to start, but he reverses them and we take a break right away. We return with HHH getting pounded in the heel corner, and walking into a sideslam. Legdrop gets two. Is there any greater gimmick disconnect than the one between the original form of D-X in 1997 and the pandering morons that they ended up as? Wow, midgets and glowsticks, what rebels. Jericho gets a chinlock, but HHH fights up and gets the spinebuster to escape. Big Show cuts off a tag attempt and goes up, but a pump splash misses by a couple of miles. Hot tag Shawn, and I sense he’s about to take a beating. He hits Show with a pair of forearms and dropkicks the knee to bring him down, but Jericho gets a cheapshot in to turn the tide. Shawn recovers and tries the superkick, but Show chokeslams him into face-in-peril status and gets two. Jericho misses the Lionsault, but rolls into a Walls of Jericho, which Shawn reverses out of. HHH comes in with KICK WHAM PEDIGREE for two on Jericho, and then another one on Show to send him to the floor. Jericho sneaks in with a rollup on HHH for two and follows with a codebreaker for two. Hornswaggle interjects himself, so Jericho kicks him in the head, drawing a pop from me, only to walk into one last superkick to keep the belts on D-X at 9:00. I’m totally blanking on how they got the belts off D-X, which goes to show it couldn’t have been particularly memorable. This was an OK TV match, with business picking up once they started trading finishers at the end. **1/2

January 25: Sheamus v. John Cena

Sheamus was champion at this point, but this is non-title. Cole is sure to note, however, that this is important in terms of “building momentum” for the Rumble. Yeah, that’ll put asses in the seats. Cena with a bulldog for two, but Sheamus pounds him in the corner until Cena gets a suplex for two. Sheamus with a clothesline and suplex for two, and he pounds Cena down for two. Man, he improved a LOT since then. Sheamus with a chinlock until Cena counters into an STF attempt, but Sheamus sends him to the floor and whips him into the stairs. The announcers posit that Cena has finally found an opponent he’s unable to beat. When even the announcers are complaining that Cena is an unbeatable Superman, you might have a problem. Back in, Sheamus misses an elbow and Cena come back with his usual stuff. Sheamus counters the FU into a backbreaker for two. Brogue Kick is countered into the STF, but Sheamus makes the ropes. They head outside and Cena walks into the kick this time, but Randy Orton runs in for the DQ at 9:50, hitting the RKO on Sheamus. Dammit, we totally got robbed of that awesome countout finish! Who booked this crap? Really slow, by-the-numbers match from Sheamus’ early days as a main event guy. **1/2

The February recap reminds me that Miz & Show took the tag titles off D-X. Now I can sleep.

February 8: ECW Champion Christian shows up to challenge WWE champion Sheamus (“We were both born without last names”) and it’s RIGHT NOW.

Christian v. Sheamus.

Sheamus puts Christian on the floor with a fallaway slam and puts him on the floor, and we take a break. Back with Sheamus holding a chinlock, but he charges and winds up on the floor. Christian hits him with a dive as Cole discusses the hot new show called NXT that’s replacing ECW. Back in the ring, Sheamus works on the arm with a hammerlock, but Christian fights back with a missile dropkick. Elbow off the middle rope and they mess something up and have to reset position. Sheamus misses the Brogue Kick and then also misses a blind charge, allowing Christian to bulldog him for two. He goes for the Killswitch, but Sheamus runs him into the post and hits the Brogue Kick. Razor’s Edge finishes at 6:30. OK, they knew they were dissolving the ECW title in a week anyway, why not just unify the titles here? Further, what kind of a babyface comes out and issues a challenge like that and then LOSES? Basically in a glorified squash, no less. And they wonder why people won’t get behind anyone? **

WWE tag team titles: D-Generation X v. The Miz & Big Show v. CM Punk & Luke Gallows

After a break, we start with Shawn chopping on Punk in the corner, only to get bulldogged for two. Show comes in and beats on both guys, but misses a charge into the corner. So I guess it’s three guys at once. HHH and Gallows team up on Show, but he fights them off. HHH slugs away and tries a Pedigree, but Show backdrops him out of the ring, and we take another break. Back with Punk working on HHH’s leg while Miz stands around, but HHH comes out of the corner with a clothesline on Miz. Good Jannetty-like sell there from Miz, as Punk gets two off it. Cole explains the rules of an elimination match for any total retards in the audience. Miz gets distracted by Serena’s boobs, allowing HHH to lay him out and make the hot tag to Shawn. Flying elbow, but Gallows breaks up the superkick. Punk tries the GTS, but eats a superkick and Shawn pins him at 5:50. So we’re down to a regular tag match, as Show clotheslines both of D-X and puts the badmouth on Shawn. He should go after his hunting prowess if he wants to REALLY hurt him. Sadly, he just chooses to punch him instead, allowing Shawn to fight out of the corner. Show keeps coming with a backdrop suplex for two. Over to Miz for more punishment in the heel corner, but Miz can’t get the SCF. Shawn hits Show with the superkick out of nowhere and makes the hot tag to HHH, and it’s high knee for Miz. Spinebuster, but Shawn tags himself in, allowing Miz to roll him up and win the tag titles at 11:30. At this point you’d expect HHH to split the team up with a well-delivered Pedigree, but they even wuss out on THAT and Shawn walks away, thus ending D-X with a whimper. I don’t get the inclusion of Punk and Gallows here, but the match was fine aside from the weak ending. *** Show’s celebration and D-X’s glum reaction to losing were a nice change from the usual blase treatment of title changes on this show, however.

The Shawn Michaels retirement tour continues as he calls out Undertaker after a good video package detailing his previous failures, and he offers his career as collateral for a rematch and another chance to end the streak. Kind of crazy that Shawn would main event Wrestlemania 12 years after what was supposed to be his retirement match in 1998. Meanwhile, his contemporary, Bret Hart, is brought out for the “nostalgic legend” treatment in a freakshow match with Vince. This whole thing was tremendous booking, mainly because it was Shawn and Undertaker booking it themselves. That being said, the initial part of the year featured Shawn and HHH acting like juvenile morons, and it’s a jarring change to suddenly have Shawn doing a serious build to his retirement match. I forget if it was that jarring as it happened in real time, but the effect here is weird, nonetheless.

Onto March, as Batista does the most heel transformation ever and wins the WWE title from John Cena, reinventing himself as an arrogant money-grubbing egotist with a sweet wardrobe. Sadly, he decided that personal satisfaction and self-respect were more important to him than my entertainment, and left just after carrying the entire RAW show on his back for a couple of months.

March 8: John Cena is kind of shocked by what Batista did to him at Elimination Chamber (winning the title after Cena had won the Chamber match) and also upset at getting kicked in the nuts the previous week in his rematch. So he calls Batista out again, and now Big Dave is bringing security with him. Dave’s super-badass but super-cowardly heel act is just magnificent. See, he’s incredibly badass, but JUST enough of a chickenshit that fans won’t cheer him for being so awesome. That’s a very fine line to walk. WHY DID YOU LEAVE US, DAVE? Batista bitches about Cena getting the “torch” from Steve Austin, but Cena counters that he’s the hardest working and Batista always arrives late. Hey, the Rock didn’t show up for PPVs until like 10 minutes before the main event, and he’s one of the greatest ever. Batista is here to make money and win titles, not “kissing babies and hugging fat girls”. TELL ‘EM, DAVE!

March 22: Shawn Michaels v. Kane

Kane pounds away in the corner and gets a dropkick for two. Suplex gets two. Chinlock and corner clothesline and Kane slugs away in the corner and follows with a sideslam for two. Kane goes up and tries a clothesline, but Shawn catches him with a crossface on the way down. That was not a pretty sequence. Kane quickly gets to the ropes, but Shawn takes him down with an anklelock now. Kane makes the ropes again, so Shawn hits him with the flying forearm and goes up with the flying elbow. He sets up to finish, but Undertaker appears after a blackout and chokeslams him. Kane gets two off that. Tombstone is reversed to the superkick to finish at 5:25. Nothing match, which ended up being Shawn’s last one on RAW. *1/2

And we finish the disc with another awesome Shawn-Undertaker video package, leading into his retirement speech on RAW the night after Wrestlemania. And even after all that, Undertaker comes out and tips his hat, because it wasn’t personal, just business. Although, and this is a minor point overall, the song choice sucked. Still, great video package regardless.

Disc Two

The April recap highlights the draft, and here’s where it makes them look really stupid. They made a big point on the previous disc about Chris Jericho losing his last tag title shot and thus never being able to appear on RAW again. So what happens two months later? He gets drafted to RAW. This is why no one buys any stipulations, ever.

April 5: Jack Swagger v. Randy Orton

Swagger is fresh off cashing in the Money in the Bank and winning the Smackdown World title, the futility of which I already covered on the Best of Smackdown DVD set. Swagger attacks in the corner and gets an avalanche to start, but misses a blind charge and Orton does the Garvin Stomp on him. I don’t get why a company so up its own ass doesn’t pay tribute to Garvin by naming it that officially, or even mentioning him. Swagger comes back with a powerslam that puts Orton on the floor, and we take a break. Back with Orton throwing uppercuts to put Swagger on the floor, but he waits too long and gets knocked off the apron and into the barricade. Back in, Swagger with a backdrop suplex for two. Vertical suplex gets two. Abdominal stretch (REALLY?!?), but Orton shockingly escapes that and then dumps Swagger. Who would seriously use an abdominal stretch outside of a tag team match in 2011? Orton’s draped DDT gets two. Orton makes the comeback with the powerslam and backbreaker and sets up for the RKO, but Swagger boots him in the head for two. Swagger with the pump splash for two. Another one actually hits and Swagger sets up to finish, but Orton flips out of the powerbomb, into the RKO at 6:27. I know you’re probably thinking “Why do you beat your newly crowned World champion on TV on the first show after winning the title?” but then Michael Cole sums it up by noting that “this was probably a message for John Cena.” Yes, the Smackdown World champion is merely a stepping stone to RAW’s champion, there you go. This was a crashing bore, as Swagger was a terrible heel at this point and Orton was a boring babyface with no sense of timing his comebacks. **

April 12: Divas Title: Maryse v. Eve Torres

Yeah, I don’t know either of these people. Maryse attacks and dumps Torres, but Eve comes back with a neckbreaker and goes up, missing a moonsault. Michael Cole, at 1:00 elapsed, says that this might be the turning point. Maryse goes to finish with whatever, but Torres rolls her up for the pin and title at 1:44. Well, this HAD to be on there, no doubt. Who could ever forget an epic like this, featuring that one chick and the other chick who’s not the first chick? 1/2*

April 26: World tag team titles: Show-Miz v. The Hart Dynasty

Funny bit from Bret Hart before the match, as he answers Miz’s demands for respect by noting that he could say that David Arquette is the greatest World champion of all time, but it doesn’t make it true either. Kidd with a low dropkick on Miz for two and it’s over to DH Smith for a delayed suplex that gets two. Miz bails and hits on Natalya, but that allows Smith to shoulderblock him on the floor as we take a break. Back with Miz holding a chinlock, and take a drink for Cole saying “Longest running episodic television show” again. Tags on both sides, as Kidd throws kicks on Show until he gets casually swatted down and tree slammed. Show tosses Kidd out of the corner for the “big man-little man” quota, and it’s back to Miz again. Kidd rolls him up for two, but Miz comes back with a neckbreaker for two. Kidd kicks free and makes the hot tag to Smith, but Miz counters the running powerslam with a rollup for two. Powerslam gets two for Smith. Smith charges and hits Miz’s boot, which gets two for Miz with the help of the ropes. Bret Hart breaks that up, and Smith uses that distraction for two. Hart Attack and Sharpshoot finish for the titles at 8:37. Fun match, but the Harts were rewarded with the most ugly belts in modern history and then a throwaway breakup angle that left both guys off TV. **3/4

May 3: Edge interviews Wayne Brady on The Cutting Edge. Brady decides to live out his dream by cutting a promo on all the other guest hosts, but Randy Orton interrupts. Now, despite Edge being all goofy and Orton interrupting a babyface promo by Brady, Orton is presumably the babyface at this point and Edge the heel. Orton hits Brady with an RKO and goes after Edge, but Edge talks him down by offering a new alliance and referencing the Two Man Powertrip from 2001. But of course, Orton gives him the RKO anyway. And FINALLY someone gets medical attention for Wayne Brady! This was interesting, but like everything else, went absolutely nowhere outside of their one match, as they got sidetracked with multi-man title matches and tag matches on the following PPVs.

May 17: Edge v. Christian

The gimmick here was that Orton got to choose Edge’s opponent for the match, so Christian was the obvious choice to mess with Edge’s head. I remember on the Smackdown set that they had a big angle together and then there was no payoff, so good to see that it wasn’t totally forgotten. Big face pops for both guys given that this is in Toronto. Christian takes him down a couple of times and gets an elbow for two, but Edge bitchslaps him. Christian fires right back and chokes him out on the ropes, and they trade baseball slides, with Christian getting the best of it. Christian hits him with a dive, but then gets sent into the stairs and only barely beats the count back in at 9. Edge goes to work on the arm and this thing grinds to a halt like a throwing a spike strip on the road during a high speed chase. Finally Christian wakes up the crowd with a tornado DDT to make the comeback, and a missile dropkick gets two. He goes for the finish, but Edge counters out, so Christian necksnaps him on the top and goes up with a flying splash that misses. Edge gets two off that. Christian with a rollup for two. Edge sends him into the corner and sets up for the spear, but Christian kicks him in the face to counter and a sunset flip gets two. Edge takes him down by the arm to slow him down again and goes another spear, but Christian moves again and goes up with a flying elbow. The arm is still bad, and he can’t get the Killswitch, allowing Edge to spear and finish at 12:03. Good selling for the finish, as the boring arm work led paid off with Christian unable to hit his finish and losing. ***1/2

May 24: Batista announces his retirement, while cutting a promo from a wheelchair with his arm in a sling. New GM Bret Hart makes Batista v. Orton for a slot at Fatal Four-Way, but Batista decides to quit the business rather than take the match. And that was indeed the last we saw of Batista. A tremendous end for Batista’s heel run, as he goes out bitching about the fans and limping out like a total pussy. And then as he’s being wheeled out by the refs, the ring announcer adds “Ladies and gentlemen, let’s hear it for Batista!”

May 31: Edge & Sheamus v. John Cena & Evan Bourne

This was their half-assed attempt to elevate Bourne before they got bored and forgot about it. Cena bulldogs Edge and Bourne comes in with a double stomp on Edge’s shoulder, then a rana and dropkick to put Edge on the floor. We take a break with Edge recovering. Back with Cena pounding on Sheamus, and it’s over to Bourne for high kicks, until Sheamus smacks him down. Edge comes in and pounds away, and Bourne is your face-in-peril. Sheamus with a delayed suplex, but Bourne flips out of it and kicks at Sheamus’s knee, before Sheamus cuts off the tag and gets a clothesline for two. The crowd of course goes crazy for it, once again showing that the tag formula is nearly impossible to fuck up. You’d think this match would convince someone to find Bourne a generic big man partner, like Luke Gallows or whoever, and just have him go out and get the heat in tag matches for the next 24 months following. Edge comes in and gets two, then boots Bourne down for two. Bourne gets an enzuigiri and it’s HOOOOOOOOT tag John Cena. SO FUCKING SIMPLE. Cena with his stuff on Sheamus, but he escapes the FU. Blind charge misses and Bourne boots him in the head, FU, and Cena lets Bourne finish with Air Bourne at 8:18. You’d watch this and think “Holy shit, run this team on top for a while and draw some money” and you’d be incorrect, of course. ***1/4

June 7: The Nexus debuts and attacks John Cena, and to this day we’re still not sure what the goal was or who was behind it all. But I know one thing: Choking someone with a tie is WRONG and will not be tolerated! Sadly, we only get the video package version of this and not the original segment.

June 14: John Cena announces that Wade Barrett and his crew have been fired, but he of all people should know how ineffective that particular storyline twist generally ends up being. The Nexus tries to attack again, but the WWE locker room band together and chase them off.

June 14: Evan Bourne v. Chris Jericho

Jericho promises to quit the promotion if he doesn’t win. Bourne gets a backslide to start for two, and a crucifix for two. Jericho bails and we take a break. Back with Jericho holding a full nelson on the mat, but Bourne fights up and gets a rollup for two. Jericho baseball slides him to the floor, but Bourne beats the count back in. Back in, Bourne reverses a suplex into a rollup for two, and they slug it out. Bourne sends him into the corner with a high knee for two, but a rana is reversed into the Walls. Bourne counters that into a DDT for two. Jericho comes back with a backbreaker for two and he goes up, but Bourne brings him down with a rana off the top for two. Bourne tries another high knee, but Jericho catches him and rolls into the Walls again. Bourne is near the ropes, but Jericho pulls him back, forcing Bourne to dig deep and make the ropes. Good heat for that. Bourne gets a high kick from the apron on a distracted Jericho and goes up, but the shooting star press hits knee this time, and the Codebreaker finishes at 7:05. Not quite as good as their PPV match, but a great TV match nonetheless. ***1/2

July 12: Randy Orton v. Edge

They fight over a lockup and slug it out in the corner, and Orton wins that one. Kneedrop gets two. Orton pounds away as Edge bails to the apron, and he gets the slingshot under the ropes to put Edge on the floor. Back in, Edge fires off a big boot to put Orton on the floor instead. Back in, Edge boots him in the head, but walks into the powerslam. Edge puts him on the floor again to disrupt the comeback, and we take a break. Back with Edge slugging away on the mat, and we hit the chinlock. For two guys who are supposed to hate each other so much, they have a boring way of showing it. Orton escapes the devastating hold with a backdrop suplex and makes the comeback. Powerslam and Edge bails to the apron, so Orton tries the DDT, which Edge reverses into his own DDT for two. Edge tries the spear, but he walks into the punt instead. Orton with a rollup for two and once again Orton goes into his month-long prep for the RKO, but Chris Jericho distracts him and Edge gets the cheap rollup for the pin at 8:30. Orton lays both guys out, but this is all for Evan Bourne’s run-in, as he tries to get revenge for an RKO the week previous, and ends up getting RKO’d in mid-air while trying a shooting star press. That took some awesome timing. Match was nothing, just a setup for the big spot at the end and an ad for Money in The Bank. **1/4

July 19: Randy Orton v. Chris Jericho v. Edge

Winner gets the title shot at Summerslam, as the Randy Orton Show continues. So three of the guys who lost the Money In The Bank ladder match compete again the next night for another title shot? And it’s three guys who have a zillion titles between them already. Three-way slugfest to start and Edge & Jericho team up on Orton in the corner, but he fights back until Edge puts him down with a cheapshot. The heels beat on Orton, but he comes back with a double DDT for two on Edge. Orton chokes away on Edge in the corner and tries the RKO, but Edge shoves him into Jericho’s Codebreaker for two. Edge & Jericho squabble and fight to the floor, and we take a break. Back with Orton dumping Jericho onto Edge, and then bringing Jericho back in with the draping DDT for two. Edge tosses Orton out and gets two on Jericho himself. So Jericho goes outside to have a nap for a while, and Edge gets two on Orton. Jericho pulls Edge out of the ring and boots Orton down for two, and goes to a chinlock on Orton. Randy makes the comeback with the powerslam for two, then goes after Edge with clotheslines and the backbreaker for two. Another try at the DDT on Jericho, but that’s reversed to the Walls. Orton has no hope of escape, but Edge breaks it up with a DDT on Jericho for two. Jericho puts him in the Walls now, but Edge quickly makes the ropes. Edge with a rollup for two and he dumps Jericho, but Orton sneaks in and tries the RKO. Edge counters to the Edge-O-Matic for two. He sets up for the spear, but Jericho cuts that off. Orton rolls up Jericho for two, and Edge rolls up Orton for two. And then all three guys clothesline each other for the Mexican standoff. Jericho backdrops Edge out of the ring, and counters the RKO, but he misses the Lionsault, and after Orton’s whole ceremonial dance routine it’s the RKO for both guys to finish at 12:03. Took a while to mesh, but the finisher fakeouts and three-way spots worked bigtime at the end. ***1/2

Disc Three

August 9: Chris Jericho & Edge v. Bret Hart & John Cena

The motivations here at a bit murky, as Cena is apparently trying to hold together the Summerslam team by fighting them or something. The Nexus are lumberjacks here as well. Edge quickly dumps Cena into Nexus, resulting in a quick beatdown. Back in, Jericho tosses Cena out again. Cena recovers and sends Jericho out, but no beating is forthcoming. Cena and Jericho trade finisher attempts and Cena winds up on the floor, but dodges a beating and then sends Jericho out again. This time, there’s no free pass for him. And it’s a sports entertainment finish as the Nexus faces off with the WWE team, and Jericho & Edge join up with them. A brawl erupts and the Nexus gets chased off. Not much of a match, just an angle basically. *

August 16: Chris Jericho v. Wade Barrett

Jericho attacks and puts Wade down with an elbow, and follows with a suplex. Dropkick and Barrett bails to the apron, allowing Jericho to get the springboard dive. Back in, Barrett knocks him off the top and sends him into the turnbuckles to take over. We hit the chinlock, but Jericho fights out and gets a missile dropkick for two. Bulldog sets up the Walls, but Barrett fights out and goes for The Wasteland. Jericho reverses that into the Walls, but Barrett easily makes the ropes. Barrett boots him down for two. Barrett tries a slingshot suplex (!), but Jericho catches him with an enzuigiri. Codebreaker is blocked and turned into the Wastleland by Barrett for the pin at 5:26. This was Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling, but nothing that would make you think Barrett should be headlining PPVs or anything. **

August 23: The Miz v. John Cena

Who would have thought this would be foreshadowing of the Wrestlemania main event? Cole says “longest running weekly episodic television show” again, so take a drink. Miz attacks in the corner, but Cena slugs back and gets a sideslam for two. Blind charge misses, however, and Miz gets a backdrop suplex onto the injured shoulder for two. Cena quickly forgets about that and slugs Miz down, then gets a suplex for two. Miz gets a cheapshot to take over, and a legdrop gets two. Cena comes back with the somersault bulldog and goes up, but Cena brings him down and we take a break. Back with Miz holding a chinlock and Sheamus watching from his throne. Oh my, King Sheamus, there was an idea that I’m glad they forgot about. Miz blocks a bulldog attempt and boots Cena down for two. Back in, Miz slingshots him under the ropes (does that move have an official name? It’s been around since the 80s at least) and Miz follows with a corner clothesline. That gets two. Another one misses and Cena makes the comeback. Vintage John Cena, if you will. Miz escapes the FU and gets a neckbreaker for two, but Cena reverses the SCF into the STF. Miz is in the ropes, however. Cena charges and runs into a big boot and Miz gets two. He sets up for the SCF again, but Cena reverses out and Miz bails. However, Daniel Bryan runs in for the DQ at 9:47 and allows Cena to hit the FU for the moral victory. Bryan makes Miz tap for good measure. Now see, this was a good, competitive PPV quality match, and had they done this in 2009 instead of making Miz look like a chumpstain in his initial feud with Cena, he would have caught fire way sooner than he did. ***1/4

August 30: CM Punk and the Straight Edge Society are out on the 900^th episode of RAW (but more importantly, my 36^th birthday). Punk is better than the Rock and doesn’t make crappy movies like The Tooth Fairy. But more importantly, RAW is against family values. Katie Vick gets mentioned for the first and only time since 2002. Punk uses other clips to illustrate the poor sportsmanship of previous RAW episodes (“I would never throw any other competitor into any body of water.”) Punk’s tirades against Steve Austin’s raging alcoholism lead to Austin’s music hitting, but Punk is just screwing with the crowd. He finishes with the millionth clip of the superplex that broke the ring on Smackdown (“I don’t know who the other guy is”), and that brings out Big Show in his smiling babyface mode. Punk clarifies that Show is not entertaining, not funny, and no one likes him, and that hurts Show’s feelings and kicks off a feud that goes on for months and results in the end of the Straight Edge Society with both Mercury and Gallows getting fired. Hilarious stuff from Punk, but kind of a depressing denouement to the whole thing.

September 6: The Miz relates his life story and whines about never getting respect from fans and peers, and finally unveils the cover of the WWE magazine, featuring himself. Daniel Bryan interrupts and does some self-deprecating humor (“I’ve got generic rock music that even I don’t recognize”), then challenges Miz to a US title match. Miz accepts and goes to attack, but gets caught in the Labell Lock, necessitating Alex Riley to make the save. He ends up tapping too. Good old school build to a title match here. And of course the magazine cover gets beat up, too.

September 13: Sheamus v. John Morrison

Take a drink for “Longest running weekly episode television show”. This is falls count anywhere and JoMo gets into the main event of Night of Champions if he beats Sheamus. Morrison keeps Sheamus off balance and then puts him on the floor with a headscissors, followed by a Shining Wizard on the floor for two. Sheamus charges and gets backdropped into the crowd, which gets two for Morrison. Sheamus gets a backbreaker and a kneelift onto the railing for two. Brogue Kick misses and an innocent lighting box pays the price, but Sheamus rams Morrison into the stage for two anyway. Morrison comes back and tries to kick Sheamus off the stage, but gets tossed off instead. Morrison lands on his feet in an amazing spot, then hits a springboard kick off the stage for two. Sheamus throws him into the railing for two. I feel like they should have done more to cash in on the parkour craze with Morrison, but I’m not sure what more they could have done without getting ridiculously contrived. Sheamus grabs a chair, but Morrison appears on top of the big screen and gets a flying bodypress on Sheamus for two. Chris Jericho comes out and hits Morrison with a chair, however, and Sheamus gets the pin at 6:45. Crazy spots like in the hardcore title days, but not much of a match otherwise. **1/2

September 27: Chris Jericho v. Randy Orton

Jericho’s pre-match promo, where he lists all the people he’s beaten, is epic (“Flash Flanagan, Flash Funk, Scott Hall, Razor Ramon…”). Jericho attacks and pounds away in the corner, but Orton hits him with a clothesline and throws forearms in the corner to take over. Jericho gets a cheapshot to put him down and they slug it out. Orton clotheslines Jericho to the floor and we take a break. Back with Orton hitting a clothesline and the Garvin Stomp, as Sheamus comes out to watch. Jericho gets the enzuigiri for two. Orton comes back and tries the RKO, but Jericho counters to a backslide for two. And we go to the chinlock. Orton fights out and makes his comeback with the clotheslines and powerslam, but he runs into Jericho’s boot. Bulldog and Lionsault, but it misses and Orton hits the backbreaker. RKO is blocked and Jericho hits the Lionsault for two. Jericho punts him to the apron, but misses the springboard dive and gets DDT’d back in as a result. He counters into the Walls, however, with Orton facing away from the ropes. Orton decides to man up and powers out instead, putting Jericho on the floor. Back in with the draping DDT and Orton does his interpretive dance routine, but Sheamus runs in for the DQ at 9:22. There’s been way too much of that on this set. Both DQ finishes and Orton writhing around like a retard, in case you’re wondering. I was really digging this one before the crap finish. ***1/2 Jericho tries to get revenge with a chair, but Orton lays him out with the RKO, and the bloodthirsty fans chant “Punt” until Orton does that as well. Don’t these ingrates know that Jericho beat Juventud Guerrera AND Gedo? He said so! Bunch of philistines.

Dolph Ziggler v. Daniel Bryan

This is US v. IC champion with nothing on the line. Bryan works for the leg as they do some mat wrestling, and Bryan kicks him down and hooks him into a surfboard. Dolph escapes and rolls him up for two, then goes to the headlock. Bryan comes back with a dropkick for two. He tosses Dolph and follows with a suicide dive, and we take a break. Back with a slugfest and Bryan clotheslines him into the corner for two. Kick combo in the corner puts Dolph down for two. Dolph’s facials there are fantastic. Ziggler comes back with his own kick to the face for two, but misses the fameasser. They double reverse a rollup and Bryan gets two off it. They slug it out from their knees and Ziggler gets an inverted powerslam for two. He goes for the MAIN EVENT SLEEPER, but Bryan reverses to the Lebell Lock, and Ziggler taps at 7:36. More good stuff from Bryan and the rapidly improving Ziggler. ***

November 8: Santino and Kozlov, in their finest gentlemanly garb, are out to put on a proper display of British etiquette and to make peace with Sheamus. Sadly, despite his best efforts at sharing tea (both green and Mister), he keeps accidentally insulting Sheamus’ ginger hair and pale skin. The joke gets beaten into the ground pretty fast, but thankfully the GM dings in and makes Santino v. Sheamus.

Santino v. Sheamus

We take a break and return with the match, as Santino is running away, so the GM dings in again and threatens to suspend him. Santino psyches himself up and preps the Cobra, but Sheamus clobbers him and beats him down. Santino goes low to draw the DQ at 2:00. DUD His celebration at surviving is cut short when Sheamus destroys him anyway, but John Morrison makes the save. Was this turd of a segment included as a part of the WWE’s anti-bullying crusade or something?

November 15: RAW goes old school and we get a Piper’s Pit. Oh yeah, it’s the John Cena one where Piper cuts the money promo to hype Survivor Series that apparently no one in the promotion could pull off themselves. This is why they need to ditch the overwritten scripts, because it’s literally costing them money. Anyway, you know the deal, Cena is very conflicted about Survivor Series and whether he should screw over either Orton or Barrett or neither. As it turned out, the only ones who got screwed were the fans. Great segment that really laid out the stakes and motivations for the PPV, even if the booking afterwards was terrible.

November 22: Randy Orton beats Wade Barrett in a rematch from Survivor Series, but his knee is messed up and The Miz cashes in the Money in the Bank and begins the Awesome Era. This was also included as an extra on the Survivor Series DVD, but certainly warrants inclusion here as well. Another note for tech geeks like myself: There’s a really neat effect where a video package of Orton v. Barrett smoothly transitions into the real-time Orton v. Miz match, and it’s a small but cool touch. Not as cool as Miz Girl, of course, but still pretty neat. By the way, here’s an idea they can steal if they want it: Keep the briefcases alive for both RAW and Smackdown winners one year, and have this scenario play out with different people. Say, John Cena is champion and defends against someone in a hard-fought match to retain the belt, but gets injured. One of the briefcase holders cashes in and beats him to win the title, but while he’s celebrating, Cena lays him out to get revenge, and then the OTHER briefcase holder cashes in on the first one and wins the title.

November 29: King of the Ring finals: Sheamus v. John Morrison

I don’t know who the chick doing ring announcing here is, but the less said about the job she does here, the better. Morrison gets booted to the floor and we take a break, and return with Sheamus covering for two. Sheamus works on the injured arm with a divorce court for two. Sheamus pounds away on the mat and goes to an armbar as Cole notes that the winner will be crowned the nineteenth King of the Ring. I was initially questioning that one, but Wikipedia confirms it. Meanwhile I miss a bunch of the match while doing that research, but it’s pretty dull anyway. Sheamus goes for the Razor’s Edge, but Morrison fights out and gets a tornado DDT for two. Morrison goes to finish with the Shining Wizard, but Sheamus blocks it and sends him into the corner. Morrison goes up, and Sheamus slams him onto the bad shoulder for two. Sheamus slaps on a Fujiwara armbar (called as such by CM Punk, something I never thought I’d hear on this show), and he’s really cranking on it, but Morrison uses the POWER OF PARKOUR to escape. Starship Pain misses, however, and the Brogue Kick and Razor’s Edge crowns Sheamus at 8:31. Good “Big heart in a bad situation” effort from Morrison here, but this didn’t end up doing much of anything for either guy. ***1/4 Sheamus and his kingship seemed to be setting him up for a beating from “King of Kings” HHH, but he just turned into kind of a joke.

December 6: WWE tag team titles: Heath Slater & Justin Gabriel v. Santino & Kozlov v. Jimmy & Jey Uso v. Mark Henry & Yoshi Tatsu

Quite the collection of jobbers challenging for the belts here. Tatsu gets a leg lariat on Gabriel for two and catches Slater with an armdrag. Henry comes in and beats on Jey Uso as Josh Matthews gets the “Longest running” line in. Since it’s not Michael Cole, no drink. The Usos get a double-team elbow on Tatsu, and Slater comes in and pins him at 3:02 to eliminate him. The Usos get a double-team samoan drop on Slater for two, but Kozlov tags himself in and headbutts everyone down. Spinebuster eliminates the Usos at 4:33. Gabriel gets a weird seated neckbreaker on Kozlov for two and Slater stomps a mudhole in the corner, but Kozlov headbutts him down and makes the hot tag to Santino. Slater quickly cuts off his comeback and stomps him down in the corner, and Gabriel gets two. He goes to a chinlock and gets a spinkick for two. We take a break (really? For THIS match?) and return with Gabriel getting the heat on Kozlov. Another hot tag for Santino and he hiptosses Gabriel and gets a stunner for two. It’s breaking loose in Tulsa, but the fired John Cena distracts Gabriel and the COBRA gives Santino and Kozlov the tag titles at 9:00. *1/2

The Bottom Line: Man, that was a really hit-or-miss disc. I’d say the Shawn Michaels stuff and the great matches on the second disc warrant a purchase overall, but there’s some real skippable stuff here, mostly involving Santino. Still, I like the idea of these year-in-review sets and hope they keep doing them. Recommended.