NWA Total Nonstop Action Review – 06.19.2002

Presented LIVE on Pay-Per-View on June 19th, 2002 from the Von Braun Civic Center in Huntsville, AL. The XWF couldn’t get a TV deal, and World Wrestling All-Stars were putting out PPV’s to mixed reactions, so we’ll let Jeff and Jerry Jarrett try their luck running a promotion, running PPV every week on Wednesday for $9.95. If you ordered any of those WWA PPV’s, you’ll see a lot of talent featured on both shows, since there’s only so many “names” out there that were available and interested.

Jeremy Borash welcomes us to the show and we’re gradually introduced to our broadcast team; Don West (best known as the pitchman for home shopping channels, tricking us into spending good money on worthless wax packs), Ed Ferrara (somehow looking more ridiculous here than when he was “Oklahoma” in WCW), and The Professor, Mike Tenay (the only guy at this point in the timeline qualified for a job calling a show, though miscast as the lead instead of jumping in with some analytics and background on lesser-known or International talent. Tenay hypes tonight’s Main Event, a “Gauntlet for the Gold”, where twenty men enter one at a time until only two men are left, and then it’s a traditional one-fall contest to crown our new NWA World Heavyweight Champion.

We’re shuffling the original lineup due to an issue with the ring (there’s blame put on a specific wrestler known as “Cheex” (Mike Staples) because LOL FAT GUY BROKE THE RING, but that could have happened under most circumstances, not just factoring one man’s weight) as Jeremy Borash introduces us to some of the legends of the NWA; former 8-time Heavyweight Champion Harley Race, Dory Funk Jr., Jackie Fargo, Bullet Bob Armstrong, Corsica Joe and Sarah Lee, Bill Berrens, and Ricky Steamboat.

Steamboat puts over the history of the NWA before being interrupted by the Ch-Ch-CHOSEN ONE Jeff Jarrett. He thinks running a “Gauntlet for the Gold’ to crown a Champion is a stupid idea and makes some age cracks. Jackie Fargo won’t let him disrespect anyone, telling Jeff to kiss his ass and says Double J will be the first man to enter the Gauntlet. Ken Shamrock comes out (making his first mainstream wrestling appearance in nearly two years) and he thinks the Gauntlet idea sucks (huh…), but Jarrett ain’t whipping his ass. Now it’s Scott Hall (fresh off his WWE termination) and HE THINKS THE IDEA SUCKS TOO. Guys… you know the heels and faces shouldn’t both tell the audience how dumb an idea is when it concerns their top title. Jarrett tells everyone to stick it, and Fargo will regret this day for the rest of his life.

Goldylocks is standing by with “the original Midget Killer”, Puppet the Psycho Dwarf. Puppet says midgets are the true stars and wants to see some midget blood tonight, and as he says that, Jeff Jarrett passes through, disgruntled from the announcement moments ago. Guys, you opened the show with your 3 biggest names crapping on your Not-Royal-Rumble and immediately followed with a promo from PUPPET THE PSYCHO DWARF. I know you got my $9.95 already (I did order this show) but come on, show us you want to be taken seriously.

A.J. Styles, Jerry Lynn, and Low-Ki vs. The Flying Elvis Impersonators:
… TNA, you’re pushing me! You dangle that first trio and then you send three guys out there in Elvis jumpsuits! We’ve got grizzled vet Jerry Lynn and rising stars Styles (who had a cup of coffee at the end of WCW’s existence) and Low-Ki against Jimmy Yang (at the time best known for his time in WCW as part of the Jung Dragons), Jorge Estrada (working NWA Wildside and Dusty’s TCW), and last but not least, Sonny Siaki (bouncing around from WCW’s Power Plant to UWA and TCW), who fans would soon identify as a knock-off Rock. WHY THE ELVIS GIMMICK? I’d ask who could possibly find this amusing, but I’m sure we all know the answer to these types of questions. Siaki doesn’t seem too interested in the silly Elvis shenanigans, so before our first match, we’ve introduced a team/group just for the sake of splitting them up! On the brighter side of things, Mike Tenay can’t wait to put over that these men will represent the X-Division; it’s not about weight limits, because there ARE NO LIMITS. Yeah, with Vince Russo in control of creative, I’m sure nothing is off limits.

The Elvis Boys want nothing to do with sportsmanship and attack before the bell, but it doesn’t take long for the tide to turn, and we get dives from Low Ki and Lynn to the floor. Styles catches Yang off the ropes with a powerslam and referee Slick Johnson counts despite Styles not covering. Lynn with a tilt-o-whirl back breaker that has Estrada selling on the apron. Yang really showing off some outstanding athleticism with his time in the ring. Siaki comes in, doing a decent job bumping and keeping up with Lynn.

The jumpsuit top comes off as Siaki gets serious, going back-and-forth with Low-Ki. Estrada enters with a springboard moonsault as Tenay puts him over as a trainee of Dusty Rhodes. Don West is already geeking out. UGLY snap neck breaker from Estrada, followed by a running SSP for a two-count. Styles with a springboard into a reverse DDT on Yang for two. Yang lands on his feet on a German suplex and connects with a spinning heel kick, but Low-Ki saves. Heck breaks loose, with everyone getting their stuff in. Low Ki accidentally knocks Styles head off and Yang hits a corkscrew moonsault for three at 6:27. Well they call themselves Total Nonstop Action, and this match delivered. If you like movez and spotty selling, this will be right down your alley. Considering some of the quality we can expect, I wouldn’t stick my nose up at something like this. Estrada had the weakest performance, but he was also given the smallest amount of time. Also, we jobbed the three guys we’re going to immediately push into contention for the X-Division Title to a trio that is going to break up in 2 weeks? Bold move, Cotton.

Teo vs. Hollywood:
It’s time for some good-old-fashion midget wrestling! Wait, they gave promo time to Puppet, but don’t have him working? I guess we need to build up one of these guys for a future contest. Hollywood attacks from behind and God Bless Mike Tenay for giving us some background on these guys, including mentioning the World Wrestling All-Star PPVs. Teo takes control, unloading with the mounted corner punches and some crude gesturing that could best be described as Austin Aries disrespecting Christy Hemme. Hollywood regains control and comes off the top with a Frog Splash for a near-fall. We get a sloppy counter of an Irish whip, but they do a solid job making up for it and getting a transition to the next spot, with Teo hitting a Russian leg sweep and finishing with a top rope senton at 2:50. It was only a few minutes and they had a decent, serious contest, minus the thrusting of the crotch spot. Definitely not an old-time midget style match.

Ed Ferrara and Don West are in the ring to hype next week’s Lingerie Battle Royal. UGH. We bring out Francine, Miss Joni, Shannon (formerly known as Daffney in WCW), Alexis Laree (future Mickie James), Sasha (not Banks), Erin, Electra, Taylor Vaughn (formerly B.B. the EMT in the WWF) and Teresa Tyler. This is such a mess, as the ladies come out from separate sides of the stage and the camera easily loses track of who to keep the camera on. I’ve never needed Cagematch more than this segment, and Sasha and Tyler don’t have pages, so if anyone knows about them, let it out below. Francine grabs the mic and reminds everyone that she’s the Queen of Extreme. Electra stands up everyone and accuses Francine of bankrupting ECW, leading into a catfight. Doesn’t have the same effect without Joey Styles squealing at the top of his lungs.

Goldylocks is standing by with Mortimer Plumtree. Who is Mortimer Plumtree? My best guess is some kind of yuppy, but to be more specific, I’ve never seen him work anywhere else, though it lists the American Wrestling Federation where he was used during their second season of tapings (doing a kayfabe relative of Lord Alfred Hayes gimmick). The men he’s managing were once his tormenters, but now they listen to him, and that includes what they are told to wear. OH GOD…

“Cowboy” James Storm & Psicosis vs. The Johnsons (w/ Mortimer Plumtree):
The Johnsons are “Richard and Rod”, and they’re two thick men under masks in flesh-tone colored bodysuits… WHY. The men under the mask, the Shane Twins, were always getting looks, and even scored a WWE contract later in the decade, briefly working TV as Simon Dean’s “Gymini”. If you could identify their names from that tag team without Google, virtual high-five. Yes, this is the James Storm of AMW and Beer Money fame, but here he’s just a happy-go-lucky Cowboy, and he’s teaming with maskless Psicosis. RANDOM TAG TEAM GENERATOR ACTIVATED.

Psicosis starts with the opposing Johnson rushing through a bunch of moves. Psicosis with the self-comeback, fighting off both men, and Storm adds a missile dropkick to clear the ring. Meanwhile, ALICIA is standing in the aisle with her eyes focused on someone or something we haven’t deciphered. WHO IS ALICIA? Hold on… Google says she’s the former Ryan Shamrock. OK. Storm controls for a bit, and Psicosis immediately gives it up, getting dropped face-first with a flapjack. It’s more of the same from the Johnsons, just hitting moves and not letting anything breathe, and most of it is sloppy. Psicosis counters a Powerbomb with a face-buster and makes the hot tag to Storm. He does a solid job handling both Johnsons but the action gets out of control and the referee can’t keep up. Plumtree hooks the ankle of Storm and Johnson with a terrible TKO for the finish at 4:52. We then pay off Alicia’s appearance as she gets money from the referee for whatever services she may have provided. The match wasn’t the worst I’ve seen, but the Shane Twins lacked any finesse with most of their execution.

Goldylocks is roaming the backstage area and comes across The Dupps; Stan and Bo, as well as their girlfriend/cousin, Fluff. They want to partake in a pre-match alcoholic beverage, but Bill Berrens denies them their rights as Americans, all while Goldylocks continues to act disgusted or annoyed, which seems to be her pre-programmed setting in all her appearances on this show.

Jeremy Borash introduces Hermie Sadler and Sterling Marlin, bringing them to the ring for… I don’t know. We’re told of their credentials in competitive driving. This feels a bit unnecessary for a show that is a little overbooked, and before I could finish typing that sentence, out comes K-Krush, formerly K-Kwik in the WWF. He doesn’t want to hear about racecar driving, this is PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING. Sadler heard enough, telling K-Krush how can anyone respect him “dressed the way he is.” K-Krush wants to get physical, but out comes Brian Christopher (sporting the Too Cool gear) for the save and poor K-Krush gets dumped over the top rope. The G-Master lays down the challenge for a match NEXT WEEK.

Christian York & Joey Matthews vs. The Dupps (w/ Fluff Dupp):
Third tag team match, and third heel team that is a joke gimmick. We’ve had Elvis Impersonators, we’ve had wrestling penises, and now we have our backwoods incest clan with a bonus of silly names like “Stan Dupp”, “Bo Dupp” and “Fluff Dupp”. As someone who didn’t grow up in the South, I had zero clue what “bowed up” meant until many years later, and was disappointed. Matthews and York had some experience in ECW and a stretch of bad luck, first signing with WCW right before they went under, then getting dropped from WWF developmental later in 2001. Of the Dupps, only Stan seems to be of anyone of significance, getting a decent-ish run in WWE as Trevor Murdoch (and was still regularly appearing for Billy Corgan’s NWA through 2025).

The Dupps get the jump on Matthews and York with a distraction from Cousin Fluff. For a second, I thought Christian York had jumped through time and came back as Facade (currently featured in JCW). Speaking of York, he recovers on the outside and hits a springboard double dropkick, followed by a double-team suplex for two. Stan cuts off Matthews (future Joey Mercury in WWE) with a full nelson slam and Bo rearranges Joey’s face (figuratively) with a straight boot. Matthews surprises Stan with a hangman’s neckbreaker and brings in York, who runs wild on both opponents. Matthews is playing dead from like 30-seconds of light assault. York with a Tornado DDT on Bo while Matthews takes out Stan. He takes his time hanging around on the top turnbuckle, as we wait forever for Fluff to get in position for the finish. She hooks the ankle, straddling York across the buckle with referee Scott Armstrong distracted (but still facing that side of the ring), allowing Bo to get the three at 3:41. The gimmick is an embarrassment, but the work was fine, for how little time they had to play with. I don’t think we see much more of York or Matthews in TNA (at least not as regulars), but the Dupps will hang around for a little while. Just wait for the “Dupp Cup.”

We dedicate a few minutes to a live performance from Country Superstar Toby Keith (who was riding a wave of momentum with some super-patriotic themes to his music) , which is interrupted by that no-good scoundrel Jeff Jarrett. He tells Keith to take his Angry American ass out of here, because he’s got a World Title to win. “How do you like ME now?” OK, that one got a chuckle out of me. ,

20-Man Gauntlet for the Gold Match:
If you skipped over the opening segment featuring appearances of Double J, Ken Shamrock and Scott Hall, we’re crowning the new NWA World Heavyweight Champion tonight, first by sending out 20 men in a Royal Rumble-style match (2 men start and 90-seconds between new participants), with the last two men standing fighting for the Championship in a standard one-on-one contest. Other than Jarrett, Shamrock and Hall, no one is confirmed to participate, so it’s a completely random field unless you tracked the lineup online and pieced together who was scheduled to appear and hasn’t worked a match underneath.

As we found out earlier, Jackie Fargo used his executive order to make Jeff Jarrett the 1st entrant, and #2 is Buff Bagwell (only a year removed from his infamous week-long run with the WWF). The crowd reacts to him like he matters, so that’s always a good sign. He controls for a bit, including hitting the Blockbuster, but Double J pops right up and ducks a clothesline, sending Buff over and out at 1:05. #3 is Lash LeRoux (after WCW was purchased, LeRoux was under a WWF deal working developmental until December 2001). Jarrett gets the jump, beating him up in and outside the ring. Double J with the Stroke and LeRoux is gone at 2:29. #4 is Norman Smiley. He gets a decent reaction, but Jarrett cuts off the Big Wiggle with a low blow. Smiley gets the Stroke and is tossed at 4:03.

#5 is Apolo, who at the time of this show, was a former 6-time IWA Heavyweight and 4-time IWA Tag Team Champion (IWA a promotion based out of Puerto Rico that TNA had a working relationship with for the first year or two of their existence). He hits Jarrett with a sit-out Powerbomb, but then Jarrett immediately pops up to feed for a pair of clotheslines. #6 is K-Krush. He makes the save for Jarrett for REASONS and hits Apolo with a scissors kick. It’s a 2-on-1 on Apolo until Slash (w/ James Mitchell) enters at #7. Slash is unrecognizable from his time as Wolfie D in PG-13, and it sounds like Mitchell has a stable called “The Disciples of the New Church.” That’s a mouthful. Apolo makes his comeback and has a short one-on-one with Slash.

#8 is Del Rios. WHO THE F*CK IS DEL RIOS AND WHY IS HE COSPLAYING AS SCOTT STEINER?! He’s even got the Not-Superman-Logo on his tights! New Generation WWF fans might remember him for his one-and-done as Phantasio, but he worked a similar gimmick in Memphis as the Spellbinder. The crowd pops and then quiets down after realizing they got themselves a fake. He adds nothing to the match. #9 is Justice. Justice is relatively unknown to the US audience, having worked primarily for IWA Puerto Rico. He’d soon get a makeover that would turn him into one of the more memorable characters in TNA history. He works big, but he’s surprisingly undersized looking in a basic singlet and some average sized guys.

#10 is Konnan. He gets a decent reaction and hits a series of rolling clotheslines and finishes the hot streak with an X-Factor to Justice. Joel Gertner comes out to do his routine before introducing “The Rainbow Express”, Bruce and Lenny. Looks like #11 is Bruce. He was last seen in WCW as “Kwee-Wee” and did a Hulk Hogan impersonation on World Wrestling All-Stars. This is rage baiting homophobia, and it will get MUCH WORSE in the weeks to come. The match grinded to a halt for THIS. #12 is Rick Steiner. He looks gassed walking to the ring! He throws his signature clotheslines and tosses Slash at 16:34. Justice steps up and gets sent out at 16:49. #13 is Malice, also managed by James Mitchell and representing the New Church. WHO IS MALICE?! It’s The Wall from WCW in generic black trunks and showing off all his tattoos. He hits some geeks with Chokeslams, including Konnan who can’t bother to go up too high for it. Bruce is tossed at 18:11, K-Krush at 18:16, Del Rios at 18:21, and Konnan at 18:32 with the most babysoft bump possible, like Bushwhackers in the Gimmick Battle Royal gentle. Oh, and there goes Steiner at 18:49! We’ve cleared the dead weight, leaving Jarrett, Apolo, and Malice.

#14 is Scott Hall, adding some star power to the festivities. Apollo is just hanging out waiting to come off the ropes and no one feeds for him, so he just kinda hops off and forearms Malice. Hall and Jarrett have a rough go before Hall plants him with the Outsider’s Edge. #15 is… Toby Keith? He gives Jarrett a suplex and along with Hall tosses the Ch-Ch-CHOSEN ONE out at 21:22! I don’t think anyone expected that… Jarrett eliminated before the final two, not the Keith involvement. Sorry, the real #15 is Chris Harris. He’s already a 3-time NWA North American Champion! #16 is The Vampire Warrior (f.k.a. Gangrel) to make up for the time lost with Toby Keith’s appearance. #17 is “Dangerous” Devon Storm (f.k.a. Crowbar in WCW). It’s just guys throwing punches. Storm hits Harris with a sit-out gourd buster to no reaction. MOVES FOR THE SAKE OF MOVES. Hall just hangs back, sitting on the turnbuckle.

#18 is Steve Corino. He’s going to make a difference, I’m sure. #19 is Ken Shamrock. Hopefully to clear some of the deadweight. He takes shots at all the geeks, but Malice won’t be toppled as easily and gets slammed down attempting a second jumping knee strike. #20 is Brian Christopher to round out the field. Christopher tosses Harris at 29:15, followed by Storm at 29:20 and Vampire Warrior at 29:42. Yup. Jerry’s Kid is WRECKIN’ FOOLS. Corino steps up to the challenge and G-Master gets rid of him at 29:46. Malice with a Chokeslam on Christopher and Shamrock dumps him at 30:22, leaving us Shamrock, Malice, Apolo, and Hall. Malice sends Apolo packing at 30:41. Hall sets up for the Edge near the ropes and you know the deal at 30:58.

So now it’s 1-on-1 under normal rules with Ken Shamrock and Malice, with Ricky Steamboat serving as the Special Referee. Shamrock charges into a boot. He attacks the body, but Malice rakes the eyes and hits Dino Bravo’s favorite move for a near-fall. Shamrock tries a sunset flip, but Malice blocks. This seems unfair to the heel, now that I think about it. Shamrock counters a Chokeslam by hooking a cross arm bar. Malice keeps smacking things like it’s a tap out, but it’s not the finish, as he finally gets to the ropes for the break. Shamrock with the Ankle Lock, but Malice gets to the ropes again. Shamrock pulls him back to the center of the ring, and Steamboat doesn’t force the hold broken. Malice to the ropes again, and now Shamrock is hot at Steamboat for doing his job. Malice creates separation and goes for a Chokeslam, but Shamrock escapes and hits the belly-to-belly suplex for three and the NWA Championship at 37:37. This was… something. It was a mostly poor Battle Royal, followed by a short, inoffensive but underwhelming one-vs-one, but watching this years later, it was interesting to see the first appearances of guys who would end up being bigger deals, as well as the interesting pool of talent assembled.

If you thought that was it, HAHAHAHA! Jeff Jarrett needs to remind us that he’s the true star, coming out to complain about how the Champion was determined by a Battle Royal. He takes a shot at Bullet Bob, and out comes Jackie Fargo and Toby Keith. NEXT WEEK IT’S GONNA BE JEFF JARRETT vs. SCOTT HALL. Hall comes out and we get a quick pull-apart to finish the show. Thank God that’s over…

Final Thoughts: That was quite the first impression, as in “yeah, I’m not ordering this next week” (purchases of their shows were infrequent until Russo became an on-air character, and then it was appointment viewing). Lots of dumb characters that have nothing to them to have any type of emotional investment and what could generously be called the leftover pile of talent the WWF didn’t want with a few pieces brought in from an international partner and guys that were getting looks at WWF TV but were never signed. The wrestling was mostly average, but it’s hard to care about that when we have flesh-colored body suit men and cousin lovers running around.