Shawn Michaels vs. Shelton Benjamin (and other Dream Matches!)

Welcome back to more Dream Matches! This time, I have a hell of a famous match for you, notable primarily for its finish and for making everyone think Shelton Benjamin was going to be a star of the future. It’s Shelton vs. Shawn Michaels on WWF RAW in 2005! You know the ending! But look at just HOW GOOD Shawn Michaels was, and how much he puts the kid over, while Shelton is portrayed like this S-tier Super-Athlete one-upping the Showstopper at his own game! I go a bit nuts with the analysis here, but it’s a famous match for a reason!

And then I decide to watch some HORRIBLE CRAP, as I have decided it’s my mission to track down matches from the “Lost Dudleys”- the awful indie workers that went nowhere while Bubba Ray & D-Von Dudley became huge stars. It’s Dances With Dudley doing his offensive stereotype gimmick against The Shah of ECW, Hack Myers! Who also sucks! Then it’s Dudley Dudley (the only Dudley whose parents were both Dudleys) teaming up with the Vampire Warrior (Gangrel) of all people, to take on… the Steiner Brothers?! Oh hey this IS a Dream Match! Almost! Then I decided to find more of that weird giant Mike Fury jobber as he apparently did a WWF squash against The British Bulldog, Davey-Boy Smith!

GOLD RUSH TOURNAMENT:
SHAWN MICHAELS vs. SHELTON BENJAMIN:
(WWF RAW, May 2nd 2005)
* This is a Mystery Challenger match in a Title shot tournament (Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler are taken aback by Shawn’s theme playing), and the most famous match and moment of Shelton Benjamin’s career is commencing. Shelton at this point is getting a BIG push as an upstart blue-chipper winning midcard belts, and he reminds me a lot of Booker T in his WCW “TV Title” era or Sakie Hasegawa in All Japan Women’s Pro Wrestling- I fuckin’ love the “Super-Athlete with a fire under their ass” type of wrestler- someone going all-out physically every night (in kayfabe and for a shoot) to demand that brass ring and get a push. But now the two-time All-American in heavyweight wrestling and TRACK (like seriously, how can you be god-tier at both things?) is against the wiliest of veterans and a legit Main Eventer. Shelton is a mix of dumbfounded and amused, here, like he’s this arrogant young rookie who now thinks he’s got a shot. Shawn is his usual “silly egomaniac” self to start.

Shawn straight away gets a waistlock takedown, but it’s immediately apparent he’s outmatched as Shelton completely swallows him up on the mat and a wide-eyed Shawn desperately rolls to the ropes to get a break. And Shelton just shakes his head at him like “Uh-uh- not gonna beat me at that”. Snot-nosed punk kid doing that to the veteran. Shawn just laughs looking like a combination of disbelief or trying to psyche the kid out (“Oh yeah? Huh? You’re good, huh?”), but after a hammerlock exchange Benjamin just rolls him around again and Shawn has to haul ass to the ropes a second time (“Get him off! Alright!”) and now he’s not so chipper about it. And just like that, the stage is set: Shelton is younger, stronger, and faster, and that isn’t going to work. Shawn grounds him with a headlock trying to sort things out, then wins an international but Shelton pop him in the head with some kicks (Shawn knows the first one grazes him and seems to stay bent over and asks him to re-do it) and Shelton catches a dazed Michaels with two armdrags and Shawn throws a fit and storms off, getting frustrated. This is such a good way to put someone over without actually flying around for them. Shawn’s clearly sorting things out in his head, going like “What works?”. Shelton takes him down and now HE controls with a headlock as Shawn seems to be intermixing his “iggies” (signals- typically slaps- to indicate the next spot) with random non-important slaps to disguise them. They move up and go International, but when Shelton does the drop-down, Shawn just side-steps over him and rolls him over with his legs for two! Ah- THAT’s the key- use his wiliness! And when Shelton kicks out and charges him, Shawn just blasts him a wicked forearm shot! See, the kid got hot and charged in with no plan and Shawn was ready for him!

Shelton sells that open-mouthed like he just got rocked, so Shawn fires a knife-edge and whips him… but Shelton just charges in and clotheslines them both over the top! Ohhhh shit he’s still in the game and is still way too fresh and strong! Shawn is PISSED on the floor, shouting at the cameraman (“Get outta my way!”) as Shelton starts recovering in the ring and talks more smack- back from break with Shawn trying a backdrop superplex but Shelton spins around on him to land on top, Shawn arching his back sickeningly on the landing and flat-backing before the double-down as we get a replay of the spot. This sets up the next phase, as Shawn dodges wild Benjamin punches and fires back with quick counters, but he charges in and now SHELTON catches him, hitting a big Samoan drop! Shelton countering the VETERAN is a hell of a thing, and it’s all through physicality and explosive force. But every one is costing him more and more energy- he comes up wobbly for a slugfest, but starts overwhelming Michaels and recovers his momentum, flattens him with a leaping forearm, then two clotheslines, shouts “come on!” and dodges a wild punch, snagging Shawn for a nasty haul-down backbreaker using one arm. Shawn is in serious trouble, with FANTASTIC selling as he just bolts off of Shelton’s knee like a bullet came out of it. Close two-count actually makes the fans jump. Shelton puts his head down and gets booted and a chop intercepts him, then Shawn hits his flying forearm with very little oomph… but kips up after a double-down! But takes only one step before SHELTON does too, and Shelton’s just got this wicked look as he jerks his head to the side and stares him down! Shawn immediately freezes in his tracks, putting that over perfectly.

Shelton goes for a kick- it’s caught and they do an awkward sunset flip bit (Shelton coming down too vertically). Shawn rolls back and pushes him over for two, but Shelton pops him upside-down for the same, and Shawn again relies on the chop to bring him down. Shelton might be running outta gas here, flopping around and gasping for air. But he reverses a whip and Shawn goes in hard, eating the Stinger Splash so Shelton can aim for his T-Bone Suplex finisher- Shawn elbows free and backdrops him down to get our fourth double-down. Shawn obviously readies Sweet Chin Music, but Shelton dodges, going for his own… it’s grabbed, but he IMMEDIATELY spins into a huge kick that flattens Michaels, and desperately leaps onto him- TWO! Shelton starts pounding the mat like “Fucking COME ONNNNN!”. Needing to finish, he puts Shawn up top, but gets smacked off and a bloody-mouthed Shawn hits the Flying Elbow! Michaels is face-down on the mat with his lip out, but starts jittering and forces himself to stand, pounds his feet for Sweet Chin Music… but Shelton catches it! Gamengiri Kick! He only gets two and is in disbelief- Shawn uses Shelton’s tights to pull himself up, but Shelton just shrugs him off and does his crazy vertical leap straight to the top rope (14 minutes in!) and clotheslines him! Another cover- but Shawn perseveres! Shelton again can’t believe this shit and is getting worked up- and this costs him. He just bounces off the ropes and rushes in, and Shawn cleverly throws him over the top… but, in maybe the greatest match finish of all time and the ultimate highlight reel moment, Shelton hangs on, springboards off the top rope, and saiiiiiiiiiiiilllllllllllllls all the way across the ring for a wild move and INTERCEPTING SWEET CHIN MUSIC!!! “OH MY GOD IN HEAVEN!” cries Jim Ross in the call only he can make, and “it is academic!” at (11:38 shown)! Shawn pins Shelton! The crowd absolutely shits itself at that spot (people shoot out of their seats on the impact and some guys are practically doubled over with laughter at how epic it was) and Shawn wins a super-hard fight.

Observation: Post-Return Shawn Michaels was a good wrestler. He was TREMENDOUS here, carrying the match against a young super-athlete with total perfection. First he plays mind-games, then he sells the frustration over and over again of Shelton just countering every single thing he tries with raw athleticism and skill. Even the veteran can’t get shit going until he starts using plain-old trickery, then short strikes to stymie Benjamin. Stuff like his chops and forearms are really all he can muster because they’re quick and can still catch him. But repeatedly it’s SHELTON who scores reversals, often with his pure physicality (catching an incoming Shawn with a Samoan drop, then a backbreaker- explosive power moves). And Shawn’s selling was GREAT- this is how you put over someone, not just with the physical stuff (like bolting off Shelton’s knee from a backbreaker) but like he’s having trouble figuring out what to do. And while Shelton was solid here, this was all Shawn- carrying the tempo, pacing, structure, etc., as well as all the big selling. Most of Shelton’s selling was like “ow, that hurt” and the occasional solid “Dazed” sell, but Shawn was painting a masterpiece. The only downer was like… repeated “both guys are dead”, but that’ll happen when you miss 2-3 minutes in commercials and we kinda gotta “fill in the blanks” of what we missed and have to just assume they’re worn down… and I think they were given Shelton time to recover his cardio as he did all these huge physical flurries and needed to build up for the next one. But like… the dude is doing a no-hands leap off the top rope (probably the heaviest wrestler ever to do that- the others are people Taka Michinoku or Manami Toyota’s size, or smaller) into a clothesline, followed by springboarding 6/7ths the way across the ring like a monster athlete. It’s tremendous.

I loved the overall story of the match, though- Shawn learns quickly that Shelton is too young, strong, and fast and gets overwhelmed trying mat wrestling, and Shelton knows it. He’s left intercepting him with precision strikes to catch Shelton carelessly charging in (a repeated theme in the match) or using trickery like flash-pins, and as the match goes on he STILL can’t get anything going, because a tired Shawn is now being flung around for charging in too much, and then Shelton starts matching all his reversals, countering his counters, etc.- we get the Sweet Chin Music reversal, catching a punch with a backbreaker, countering the kip-up with his own, cooler one, then catches Sweet Chin Music with a kick AGAIN but starts getting more and more frustrated as Shawn’s famous resilience becomes his only weapon. Shelton can’t put him away and he’s getting extreme in his attempts to win as he can TASTE THIS- going up top foolishly when his opponent specializes in a flying elbow, for example. Or just yeeting himself at Shawn again and again in attempts to just brute force him down. And then he tries this insane springboard, which LOOKS awesome but is just so wild and reckless, and BANG! Jim Ross hits one of his best “in the moment” calls and we get an all-timer finish to end the match. This whole thing puts over Shelton like gangbusters as he takes Shawn to the absolute limit in an amazing match, while also putting over Shawn’s wiliness, veteran instincts and perseverance against an opponent who’s completely overwhelming him. Shelton came off like he was almost unstoppable here, and all Shawn could do was survive and hope he made a mistake. Which is the perfect way to pin a Young Super-Athlete-type. Have them get too aggressive and make critical errors, relying too much on physical power when it’s a thinking man’s game.

A real sign of how good Shawn was in that match, in my opinion, is that nearly every comment about the match is “how was Shelton not a main eventer after this one?” like it was so obvious to make him one. Because they didn’t realize that Shawn was 90% of the reason the match was so good. Like Shawn hoodwinked wrestling fans into thinking Shelton was a shoo-in for the main event in one match XD. Like THAT’s the real G.O.A.T. shit right there. So why did Shelton not become a main eventer? Well, he wasn’t always wrestling Shawn. Plus the “Charisma” thing. But like, he had 20+ year career in big companies- he did fine.

Rating: **** (a FEW too many double-downs here and there, and Shawn was obviously carrying it, but a fantastic story from start to finish with a GOAT ending)

D-Von, Buh-Buh Ray, Sign Guy, Big Dick, Dances With, and Chubby Dudley.

HACK MYERS vs. DANCES WITH DUDLEY:
(ECW, 1995)
* Yes, I’ve decided to find the “Lost Dudleys”. Dances With Dudley is obviously a parody of “Dances With Wolves” and is a chubby accountant-looking fucker doing a Native American gimmick, complete with a headdress and awful “tomahawk chop” motions- way too herky-jerky and he stops too suddenly. He’s indie wrestler Adolfo Bermudez, and believe it or not, this is his peak in the business. Even his Wikipedia article, which could NOT have been more obviously written by himself, fails to hype the rest of his career up significantly (“He had great feedback from promoter Bobby Lombardi but left when the Long Island Wrestling Federation did shows further east on Long Island.”). He gets goaded by the negative reaction from the fans and flips them off with a “fuck you!” as the “Shah” of ECW, Hack Myers (an early name that got a midcard push but was gone before they became more well-known), comes down. I keep forgetting what Myers looks like- basically a jobbery figure with a doughy body, saggy man-boobs and a preposterously awful haircut. A perfect look for someone Papa Shango sets on fire with voodoo; not so much as a “popular midcard guy”. And OH MY GOD is he really only 22 years old here? Dear God even I have a better body than this guy and I’m almost twice that old. Joey Styles has the nerve to say “All kidding aside, these inbred Dudleys are GREAT WRESTLERS”, trying to do the “hey now come on, fans” thing like WWF when Doink was around, or AEW trying to explain that Chuck Taylor can still wrestle with his wriggly-jiggly body.

The fans do the annoying “SHAH!” thing every time Hack throws a punch, then “Shit!” every time DW Dudley does something, but DW gets a dropkick. Hack quickly overpowers him with “punches” then whips him into the corner, where DW does the Bret Bump and gets clotheslined in the back of the head. He drapes DW’s throat across the bottom rope and legdrops it, then awkwardly pulls at DW’s hair and the kid just arbitrarily stands up with his head down like he’s “out”, and Hack finishes him with both knees driving him down from the top rope at (1:19). Lol but the Dudleys are “great wrestlers” like Joey says. But then the Sandman comes in, bloody-faced from some prior thing, smashing both guys with a pair of Singapore canes and stands tall. Yeah, this is ECW alright.

Rating: DUD (just a squash with some sloppy punches)

THE STEINER BROTHERS (Rick & Scott Steiner) vs. DUDLEY DUDLEY & THE VAMPIRE WARRIOR (w/ Big Dick Dudley):
(ECW, Orange County Fair in Middleton, New York, 1995)
* haha, I found another “lost Dudley”, and not only is he teaming up with Gangrel, but their opponents are the STEINERS. They’re debuting in ECW here, but weren’t around long- the heels get no reaction whatsoever, but the Steiners are pretty over. Scott’s in blue and Rick’s in black with neon squares all over it. Vampire Warrior’s in a black singlet and DD’s in tie-die and overalls. He’s Jeffrey Bradley, another do-nothing indie guy. He was in ECW about a year, then took a “hiatus” from wrestling and returned to basically nothing indies and Puerto Rico in 2008 and never really went anywhere.

Dudley starts with Scott, getting armdragged and hiptossed- he goes to the eyes but puts his head down and eats the butterfly bomb. Vampire Warrior’s in, but gets caught in mid-air for Rick’s slam. Dudley knees him from the apron and they heel it up and working him over with basics, and when Rick starts no-selling, Dudley rakes the eyes again and hits a terrible hangman’s neckbreaker, getting launched off on the pin. He doesn’t sell being flung across the ring, though, and comes off with the Flying Nothing onto Rick’s boot. He can’t sell THAT well, either, but it’s dual tags. Scottie hits Steinerlines (though Dudley just takes a shoulderblock) and then things fall apart as Vampire Warrior tries to boot Scottie when he puts his head down, but Scott just ignores it and kicks him like that wasn’t the plan, then it’s stereo powerslams! But Scott puts his head down and NOW comes that kick (oh, VW thought the other one was to be this spot, haha), then Vampire climbs up for another Flying Nothing, ending up in an overhead belly-to-belly. Scott his a release Dragon Suplex and they set up the Steiner Bulldog as Dick carries Dudley away at (5:47).

A very lazy match, the Steiners doing only a couple moves before the heels cheat and work over Rick with poorly-wrestled basics. My only view of Dudley Dudley so far reveals a guy who looks like he’s barely out of training, unable to hit any strikes convincingly or even SELL. He responds to being flung off Rick for the pin with no bewilderment or fear, just going back in for more offense, then when he lands on Rick’s boot, just calmly leans against the ropes with no body language indicating pain whatsoever. At least Vampire Warrior can go up for the suplexes and stuff. But it’s pretty much the tag equivalent of the “Bret Hart Template” on a lazy day.

Rating: * (nothing much to it)

What a friggin’ beast Davey-Boy was. Fury is like 6’4″-6’5″ and around 300 lbs. The sheer mechanics of this is nuts.

“THE BRITISH BULLDOG” DAVEY-BOY SMITH vs. MIKE FURY:
(WWF Wrestling Challenge, Sept 15th 1991)
* Yes, I decided I MUST see more Mike Fury matches after last week’s “Towers of Power” dreadful turd. Turns out he did some WWF jobs in the 1990s and never really went anywhere in the business, despite being FRIGGIN’ HUGE.

Davey-Boy handily moves Fury around as Monsoon & Heenan totally ignore the match and talk about an upcoming tour of England, Sgt. Slaughter, and other stuff. Heenan once notes “this is a BIG GUY” as Fury absolutely towers over Davey-Boy (who isn’t tall but is still REALLY muscular). Davey works the arm, amrdrags him around, and then effortlessly hits the delayed suplex on the 6’5″-ish lanky jobber. Jesus Christ. He hits a chinlock (lol he must have forgotten he was told a longer match time), Fury tries to fight up, but Davey just hammers him with strikes and a clothesline leads to the Running Powerslam at (2:39), Davey repositioning Fury in mid-air with terrifying ease and slamming him.

Rating: 1/4* (a pretty one-sided squash with Fury getting absolutely nothing despite his size, but HOLY CHRIST Davey was immensely strong, hitting his two big power spots on the 300-pounder like he was a Cruiserweight)