Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan are calling today’s action, still broadcasting from Springfield, Massachusetts.
Opening Non-Title Contest: Bret Hart (Intercontinental Champion) (27-0-3) beats Kato (1-3) via submission to the Sharpshooter at 4:11:
As his win-loss record shows, Kato is not worthy of a title match. Kato’s offense is bad, doing lots of chops any time that he gains the advantage. Bret also seems zoned out, doing a few moves and then locking in an armbar to kill time. The crowd is also burned out from the long taping and does not react to much. A Kato blind charge eats knee and Bret comes off the second rope to flatten his adversary with an elbow smash. He locks in the Sharpshooter but falls after he turns over the hold because Kato goes onto his side rather than his back, but Kato submits anyway. Rating: *
Lord Alfred Hayes’ Special Report recaps the stakes of this year’s Royal Rumble. He confirms that the Undertaker, Roddy Piper, Ric Flair, and Hulk Hogan are confirmed for the match. A replay of Hogan’s promo from last week airs.
The Undertaker (w/Paul Bearer) (32-1) pins Mark Thomas after the Tombstone at 2:32:
Like Superstars, Jamison is shown in the crowd and Monsoon puts him over as the Bushwhackers biggest fan. In the split screen, the Undertaker and Bearer tell WWF President Jack Tunney that he might be their next victim after they win the Royal Rumble. The Undertaker also stares a hole through Jamison midway through the squash as Jamison cowers in fear. The Undertaker holds Thomas so long in the Tombstone position that he almost loses his handle on him, but manages to complete the move and prevails. Following the match, the Undertaker and Bearer stuff Thomas in a body bag and the Undertaker stomps on it.
Non-Title Match: The Legion of Doom (WWF Tag Team Champions) (22-0) defeat Bob Wisseman & Nick Tarantino when Hawk pins Wisseman after the Doomsday Device at 3:07:
The skinny jobbers take a beating from the WWF Tag Team Champions. Wisseman takes some hard elbows in the corner from Animal and a brutal clothesline against the buckles and Doomsday Device put him down for the count.
Irwin R. Schyster (21-1-3) pins Glen Ruth after the Write Off at 3:02:
IRS tells the crowd before the match that they had better not buy Christmas presents because they will need to pay their federal taxes. Monsoon puts over IRS’ stamina, arguing that he will be in the Rumble for a long time. Ruth floats over an IRS slam attempt and schoolboys his opponent for two but he cannot build any momentum that. IRS uses a few rest holds to zap whatever fighting spirit Ruth has left and hits the Write Off for a third-straight singles win.
Monsoon highlights how the new WWF Magazine has an article on whether the Rockers are breaking up. The Rockers are shown backstage playing Game Boys against each other.
Gene Okerlund does The Royal Rumble Report.
Ted DiBiase (w/Sensational Sherri) (27-3-1) defeats Dale Wolfe via submission to the Million Dollar Dream at 2:50:
Instead of talking about DiBiase’s feud with El Matador, Monsoon and Heenan talk more about whether Sherri is attractive with all of the makeup on her face. Jamison blows a kiss toward Sherri and her disgusted facial expression is great. In the ring, DiBiase powerslams Wolfe and puts him to sleep with the Million Dollar Dream. Afterward, DiBiase stuffs $100 down Wolfe’s throat.
Tune in next week to see the New Foundation, the Beverly Brothers, and Virgil in action! There will also be a special interview with the Mountie!
The Last Word: This was just a show for content. To conclude the year the WWF ran long television tapings where they taped three shows instead of four. The burned-out crowd was evident by this episode, so next week does not promise much better.
Here is a recap of the WWF’s house show action, courtesy of thehistoryofwwe.com:
Hartford, Connecticut – Hartford Civic Center – December 12, 1991 (3,500): El Matador won a 20-man battle royal to earn an Intercontinental Championship match later in the evening, last eliminating the Warlord. The battle royal also featured Sergeant Slaughter, Virgil, Jim Neidhart, Kato, the Barbarian, Jim Powers, the Beverly Brothers, the Genius, the Bushwhackers, the Mountie, the Big Bossman, Skinner, Hercules, Greg Valentine, Colonel Mustafa, and General Adnan…The Big Bossman pinned Hercules with a roll up…Sergeant Slaughter beat Colonel Mustafa and General Adnan in a handicap match by pinning Adnan with a roll up…Jim Neidhart wrestled Blake Beverly to a double count out…The Bushwhackers defeated Skinner & Kato when Butch pinned Kato…The Mountie pinned Virgil after using the shock stick…Intercontinental Champion Bret Hart beat El Matador…Randy Savage & Hacksaw Jim Duggan wrestled the Undertaker & Jake Roberts to a double disqualification when Savage brought the timekeeper’s bell and the Undertaker brought the urn into the ring.
Long Island, New York – Nassau Coliseum – December 13, 1991 (8,000 to 10,000): Greg Valentine pinned Kato after an elbow drop…Hercules pinned the Barbarian with a roll up after 8 minutes…The Beverly Brothers & the Genius defeated the Bushwhackers & Jim Neidhart when Blake pinned Luke after hitting him with the Genius’ scroll in 14 minutes…El Matador pinned Skinner after El Paso Del Muerte…The Mountie & Irwin R. Schyster beat Bret Hart & the Big Bossman when IRS pinned the Bossman after hitting him with a briefcase…Colonel Mustafa pinned Jim Powers after a suplex in 6 minutes…Virgil defeated the Warlord via disqualification after the Warlord did not break a choke hold after a five-count…Randy Savage & Hacksaw Jim Duggan defeated the Undertaker & Jake Roberts when Savage pinned Roberts with a roll up after 9 minutes. Elizabeth did not appear for the match as advertised.
Boston, Massachusetts – Boston Garden – December 14, 1991 (3,000; matinee): El Matador beat Hercules…Intercontinental Champion Bret Hart pinned the Mountie in three seconds…The Beverly Brothers & the Genius defeated the Bushwhackers & Jim Neidhart when Beau pinned Butch…Irwin R. Schyster wrestled the Big Bossman to a double disqualification…Virgil defeated Skinner…Sergeant Slaughter beat Colonel Mustafa & General Adnan in a handicap match by pinning Adnan…Randy Savage & Hacksaw Jim Duggan defeated the Undertaker & Jake Roberts when Savage pinned Roberts.
Honolulu, Hawaii – Aloha Stadium – December 14, 1991 (18,000): Genichiro Tenryu beat Haku…The Texas Tornado defeated the Great Kabuki…The Nasty Boys beat the Rockers…Jimmy Snuka defeated Rick Martel…Roddy Piper beat Ted DiBiae via disqualification when Sensational Sherri interfered…The British Bulldog defeated the Berzerker…WWF Tag Team Champions the Legion of Doom beat the Natural Disasters…Hulk Hogan beat Ric Flair via count out.
Backstage News*: As part of the WWF-SWS SuperWrestle card in Tokyo on December 12, Hulk Hogan defeated Genichiro Tenryu in the main event with an enzuigiri and three clotheslines in the main event. Also, the Legion of Doom defended the tag team titles against the Natural Disasters, Ted DiBiase beat the Texas Tornado, George & Shunji Takano beat the Rockers, Naoki Sano beat Rick Martel, and Ashura Hara & the British Bulldog beat Haku & Yoshiaki Yatsu. The card drew 40,000 fans but many tickets were given away for free. The Japanese press thought Tenryu would beat Hogan since Hogan is no longer WWF Champion and it was going to be a big deal because Hogan had not lost in Japan since 1981. However, Hogan showed up late to the show and the booking was changed.
*Despite the crazy snake angle before Survivor Series, matches featuring Randy Savage and Jake Roberts are drawing poorly around the horn. To save those towns, the WWF is going to add Sid Justice-Undertaker matches when Sid returns in January.
*The media’s interest in steroids in wrestling is not going away either as Inside Edition is planning a big piece for January 3 and 20/20 is putting together an expose of their own.
*In talent relations news, Jimmy Snuka has been released from his WWF contract.
*Backstage news was provided courtesy of Dave Meltzer’s Wrestling Observer for December 23.
Up Next: Prime Time Wrestling for December 16!