Vince McMahon and Bobby Heenan are tonight’s hosts.
McMahon and Heenan are quickly joined by Sergeant Slaughter, Colonel Mustafa, and General Adnan because those three insist that they are taking over the show. Slaughter tells WWF Champion Hulk Hogan that he will do whatever it takes to regain the WWF Championship. He calls out a muscular guy in the audience who is wearing a “Hulk Rules” shirt, who comes down to confront him. Slaughter says that fan does not have what it takes to survive Slaughter’s boot camp. The fan accepts the challenge.
Virgil comes into the studio. McMahon narrates footage of the lead up to Virgil’s babyface turn at The Royal Rumble. Heenan asks Virgil if he can really box, having boxing mitts at the ready.
The Bret Hart-Ted DiBiase match from Saturday Night’s Main Event is shown.
Heenan has the mitts ready for Virgil to hit. Instead of going for the mitts, Virgil socks Heenan in the gut and McMahon declares him the winner via TKO.
Gene Okerlund’s Update segment recaps Earthquake squashing Damien on Superstarstwo weeks ago. Heenan says he has no compassion for Roberts because he does not have a pet. He insists that those who have pets are weak people.
The Bushwhackers (7-1) defeat Brian Costello & Doug Wallen when Luke pins Wallen after the double stomachbreaker at 2:05:
Power & Glory and Slick do an insert promo, dismissing any chances the Bushwhackers have against them. Wallen has an awkward times running the ropes. The Bushwhackers finish the inexperienced jobber quickly with the Battering Ram-double stomachbreaker combination.
The Hogan fan is shown backstage climbing steps with General Adnan on his back. He is on the eighth flight out of twenty.
McMahon and Heenan talk with Jamison, a nerdy fan, in the audience. Jamison was comedian John DiGiacomo and McMahon discovered him at an improv show at a friend’s birthday party. He had made a few appearances on the Bobby Heenan Show in 1989, an ill-fated effort to give Heenan his own thirty-minute program after Prime Time Wrestling. Heenan makes fun of Jamison’s uncombed hair and tells him to go home, but Jamison says he has season tickets. He also cracks that the WWF should breed Jamison with the Rosati Sisters, who are also in the audience.
The 20-man battle royal from Saturday Night’s Main Event airs.
Backstage, the Hulk Hogan fan is struggling to do more pushups as Colonel Mustafa whips him with a riding crop.
The Legion of Doom come into the studio. Hawk says that they do not care if the Nasties are nasty because the tag team champions are boys. Animal adds that if the Nasties try to spray paint them in the face, they will stick the spray can where the sun does not shine.
After the commercial break, the Legion discuss having a bowl of slog in the middle of a workout. Hawk discusses how it includes a toad, oysters, Mexican jumping beans, dead aquarium snails, worms, garlic, and brontosaurus bones and boils in a crock-pot.
The British Bulldog (14-0) beats Haku (1-4) with a crucifix at 7:01 shown:
This match, which took place at the London Gardens on April 21, is joined in progress to Haku scoring a near-fall from a piledriver. This follows the same template as their match on Prime Time on March 11 where there are fun spots but the match’s momentum keeps getting killed by Haku’s rest holds. There is a fun headbutt faceoff where both men keep trying to outdo the other and Haku wins after taking five headbutts and raking the Bulldog’s eyes. After seven minutes, the Bulldog comes off the ropes and wins with a crucifix, the same move that helped him beat Haku two months ago. Rating: *¼
The Legion continue to add more ingredients to the crock-pot, putting in more beans, liver, and two eggs. McMahon is delivered a note that discusses that Heenan’s car is blocking a pregnant woman’s trip to the hospital. Heenan refuses to move his vehicle, so the Legion go to do it for him.
Sergeant Slaughter’s crew have shoved the Hulk Hogan fan’s head in a toilet and are having him clean it. That prompts Jamison to cry out that he has to go to the bathroom.
Hulk Hogan’s appearance on the Funeral Parlor on Superstars is shown.
In the parking lot, Animal moves Heenan’s car by lifting its back bumper. In the studio, Heenan gets a spoonful of the slog and wipes it on Lord Alfred Hayes’ dress shirt.
The Mountie (w/Jimmy Hart) (13-0) defeats Red Tyler with the carotid control technique at 2:31:
Tyler, who looks similar to Mark Calaway, was a longtime WWF jobber, making appearances since 1988. He also wrestled for the AWA and Stampede Wrestling, winning matches in the latter in 1989 as Blackheart Destruction.
Tyler wears red, white, and blue flag tights but that does not help him defeat the foreign menace tonight. The Mountie screams at the audience in between spots. He does two double handed chokeslams and wins with the carotid control technique. After the bell, the Mountie handcuffs Tyler to the corner turnbuckles, reads him his rights, and shocks him with the cattle prod several times.
As Hayes sleeps in a chair, Heenan snatches his wallet and finds a condom. He also finds some Ex-Lax and throws it into the Legion of Doom’s slog.
The Nasty Boys-Rockers bout for the tag team titles on Superstars airs.
Tugboat (7-3) pins the Black Demon after a splash at 2:36:
The Demon was a jobber character that went back to the 1970s. At various points Tony Nero, Don Serrano, Charlie Fulton, and Jose Luis Rivera wrestled under the mask. The previous year, the WWF featured the gimmick as a joke on WCW’s Black Scorpion character.
According to cagematch.com, Rivera was the Demon for this match. There is some early comedy as the Demon hits Tugboat with a clothesline and celebrates, but Tugboat does not sell it and destroys the jobber in response to bounce back after a loss to Mr. Perfect a few days ago.
The Hulk Hogan fan crawls back into the studio with Sergeant Slaughter, Colonel Mustafa, and General Adnan. The fan cannot do any more pushups and screams that he quits. The heels put the boots to him until the Legion of Doom and Virgil make the save.
The Legion finish the slog by setting it on fire, throwing in the match, pouring an undefined liquid into it, and putting in a sour cream-ice cream combination. They put together a bowl for Heenan, who is coerced into drinking some by the Legion. Heenan feigns like he is going to vomit on members of the audience as Vince previews Darren Drozdov’s future gimmick by screaming about how Heenan might puke. When Heenan gets to the backstage area that ends the show.
Tune in next week to see Koko B. Ware and gospel singers, Earthquake, and the Texas Tornado!
The Last Word: This was a bad outing of Prime Time since the prominent matches were recycled from Saturday Night’s Main Event. Bobby Heenan did have some funny jokes, though, and that saved several of the studio segments.
Up Next: WWF Superstars for May 11!