The SmarK Rant for WCW Worldwide – 04.27.91

The SmarK Rant for WCW Worldwide – 04.27.91

Originally written 02.19.26

Taped from Montgomery AL on 04.08.91

Your hosts are Tony Schiavone & Gordon Solie

Sid Vicious v. Marvelous Marc Mero

Yup, Mero does another TV job leading up to his “debut” at Superbrawl, dressed exactly like Johnny B. Badd. Sid chokes him out on the ropes and puts the boots to him before hitting him with a big jumping double axehandle to the back and big boot. And the powerbomb finishes at 2:24. Mero not looking so marvelous here.

SUPERBRAWL CONTROL CENTER! WITH GORDON SOLIE!

Yes, the special announcement teased last week is that TATSUMI FUJINAMI will challenge Ric Flair for the WCW World title or maybe it’s for two different World titles or something, we don’t really know. Also it’s Butch Reed v. Ron Simmons in a THUNDERDOOM 91 cage match in a deal where no one was really sure if Reed would bother showing up. So the gimmick is that they’re in a steel cage, but Teddy Long is also in a smaller cage and hanging above the ring, and whoever can climb up and break that cage open first gets to Teddy as a weapon, presumably. Also Barry Windham faces Brian Pillman in a taped fist match. Plus El Gigante v. Sid in a stretcher match! Steiners v. Sting & Luger for the World tag team title! Bobby Eaton challenges Arn Anderson for the TV title, and we actually get a PROMO from Bobby to build it up. Yikes.

The Steiner Brothers v. The State Patrol

Scott takes Wright down to start, but Wright beats on him for some offense until Scott suplexes him out of the ring. Over to Rick, who hits Wright with a powerslam and it’s over to a reluctant Buddy Lee Parker. Scott throws him around and Rick hits a double-team elbow, but Wright breaks it up, so Scott gives him the Frankensteiner and pins him at 3:39. Dude wasn’t even legal there.

Meanwhile, in Japan, Fujinami pins Ric Flair to maybe win the World title or maybe not, who can say? Regardless, they’re going have another match at Superbrawl to end the dispute, even though we can’t say what the dispute is, because Flair sure is the WCW World champion and there’s no dispute about that. So buy the show now!

Ron Simmons v. Terry Bronson

Bronson tries to attack and Simmons immediately hits him with a spinebuster and beats him down. I should note Ron still has “D” on his boots, apparently unable to afford new ones yet. To the floor and Ron ties up Bronson in the railing and pulls on his arms, and then back in with a spinebuster to finish at 1:54.

The One Man Gang v. Joey Maggs

Gang is currently hypnotized into a satanic trance by Kevin Sullivan for those keeping track, and he attacks Maggs and chokes him out in the corner. More choking on the ropes while Sullivan makes weird sex noises at ringside, and Gang hits him with a corner splash and 747 to finish at 2:10. El Gigante makes the save to set up that feud, despite already being in a feud with Sid.

The Freebirds v. Keith Hart & Jamie McKinnon

Can I just go for ONE GODDAMN WEEK on this show without a Freebird squash? Hayes puts both jobbers down with his FAMOUS LEFT HAND and Garvin comes in with a knee to the gut of McKinnon and drops him on the top rope. Hayes drops elbows on him and chokes him out. Garvin with a backdrop and it’s back to Hayes, who hits him with a clothesline and finishes with the DDT at 3:31. For two guys who are supposed to be experts at the move, both Freebirds are really shitty at doing it. Thankfully DDP was spun off into a more interesting direction at Superbrawl. Afterwards, they do a promo and DDP promises that a “third Freebird” is debuting at Superbrawl, and his name is Fantasia. Yeah Disney had something to say about that one.

Sting & Lex Luger v. Chuck Coats & Kevin Dalton

Sting and Luger double-team Coats and Luger suplexes him and follows with a backdrop. Dalton tries to come in and Sting sends him right back to the corner and makes him tag in legally before hitting a Stinger Splash and Deathlock to finish at 2:10.

You know what would have made the SuperBrawl main event better? A STORYLINE THAT MADE ANY FUCKING SENSE.