The SmarK Rant for NWA Power Hour – 07.13.90

The SmarK Rant for NWA Power Hour – 07.13.90

I keep putting off reviewing Nitro 2000 and honestly I’m nearing the end of my desire to continue with it at this point. We’ll see how I feel tomorrow night. But for now, it’s back to 1990 WCW for the dawn of Sting’s World championship reign!

Taped from Marietta, GA

Hosted by Jim Ross

Brian Pillman v. Fred Avery

Avery beats on Pillman in the ROOS™ corner and slams him, but misses a big splash and flails around on the mat like a beached whale. Pillman dropkicks him down again and goes to work on the leg, but let’s be honest, pushing him over on his back is sufficient to keep him down. Pillman beats on him with chops in the corner, but Avery manages to hit a corner splash, RIGHT IN THE ROOS™! That one never caught on, but it certainly should have. Pillman comes back again with a superkick and goes up with a flying bodypress to finish at 2:38.

Meanwhile, Stan Hansen heard Tommy Rich talking about their past and friendship together and it means NOTHING to him! And if he brings his snot nosed baby to ringside and talks about “Uncle Stan” then it’s gonna go even worse for him! GET READY FOR THE BELL and stay out of his business, Tommy!

WRESTLING NEWS NETWORK! WITH GORDON SOLIE!

Sting has won the NWA World title from Ric Flair at the Great American Bash PPV, and also some guy named Big Van Vader debuted and looked impressive. So we join Sting for the past-match party, with champagne spraying all over him. God I hope that’s champagne.

Also Gordon Solie wishes a speedy recovery to Brutus Beefcake, who was injured in a parasailing accident this week. Well that’s nice of him.

Brian Pillman joins Jim Ross and they talk about the new NWA Top 10 that’s being established to determine who the top contenders are. Hopefully it doesn’t show up for a couple of weeks and then get forgotten about immediately and ignored, AM I RIGHT?

Lex Luger v. DEATHROW

This guy predates Nailz by 2 years, I should note. Basically he looks like New Jack ate Mark Henry. Luger works the arm and then falls victim to a corner elbow that Luger looked like he didn’t see coming, and he’s PISSED and just puts Deathrow down with a clothesline and pins him at 2:10. This guy was kind of a load. I’m intrigued to see more of him for some reason.

Bob Caudle joins JR to discuss the “Running the Gauntlet” concept that’s being tested soon, where someone draws three names from a hat on the Friday night show, and if they can beat all three guys over the Friday, Saturday and Sunday shows, they win $15,000. But they lose any of the matches, the three guys drawn will share the $15,000. That’s a cool idea to tie the weekend shows together and give them some kind of stakes. That being said, given how haphazardly these shows were taped and then assembled in post-production most of the time, who knows how long they’d be able to put together a coherent narrative.

Meanwhile, Arn Anderson and Sid Vicious discuss solving problems, back when their relationship was much less strained than it would become later. So after losing at the Bash, they stayed up late PLOTTING and planning the demise of their enemies. Sid reminds us that he’s not a blond haired prima donna beauty like Lex Luger presumably is.

Barry Windham & Arn Anderson v. Joe Cazana & Paul Sampson

Cazana and Sampson sounds like a Vegas magic duo who don’t really work the bigger hotels. Arn puts the boots to Cazana and Barry puts him down with a back elbow while JR thanks Schlitts Malt Liquor for promoting an upcoming Omni show. Classy. Barry hits a DDT on Cazana and tosses him, where recently repackaged Trucker Norman lurks at ringside with an air horn. JR promises a full report on the previous whereabouts of Trucker Norman on an upcoming episode. I mean, don’t do anything on MY account. Over to Sampson, and Arn beats on him in the corner and rakes his face on the ropes for fun, then puts him down with a spinebuster. Over to Windham, who drops the geek with a back suplex as Paul bumps right on the back of his own head, and then the lariat finishes at 4:45. Quite the array of jobbing talent on this episode.

Meanwhile, Tommy Rich has nothing but fight in him for Stan Hansen.

Michael Hayes v. Tracy Smothers

Michael Hayes looks like he applied his eyeliner with Homer’s makeup shotgun before the match. That is neither demure nor mindful, and in fact is veering into JD Vance territory, minus the couch fucking. Hayes runs away to start and shows off his stalling prowess, and they fight over the lockup before Tracy rolls him up for two. Tracy goes to work on the arm as Hayes is starting to look like he’s going to work on a big turkey leg between matches at this point. Speaking of which, JR goes into a discussion of Hayes entry into the sport at a young age, and how he’s in his “late 20s” at this point. Given that he was born in 1959 that means he was actually 31 at this point, which while younger than I would have guessed, is not exactly “in his twenties”. I guess you could classify it as VERY late twenties. Regardless he looked like a very ragged 31, although he then proceeded to not age at all for the next couple of decades to even things out. They start doing the 5:00 call at 4:00, so you can see where we’re going with this, I’m assuming. Hayes grabs a headlock, but Tracy takes him down with armdrags and Hayes claims a hairpull. I assure you, no one in their right mind would want to touch that greasy mop in 1990. Tracy runs him into the turnbuckles and Hayes claims another hairpull as even JR is cracking jokes about what a greaseball Hayes is looking like this week. Hayes goes to the apron to stall and Tracy dropkicks him into the railing, which is dangerously close to Hayes TAKING A BUMP. Back in the ring, JR once again reminds us that the Omni show is brought to you by Anaconda Malt Liquor, which gives you the “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” and tastes good, too! Hayes does some more stalling and puts his head down for a backdrop, which allows Hayes to leisurely hit him with a forearm to take over. Well now we’re settling more into the pace that PS appreciates. Hayes misses a knee and Tracy comes back to work the leg with a spinning toehold. Hayes goes to the eyes and slugs Tracy down with his famous left hand for two. We hit the chinlock and then even Hayes gets bored of his own match and tosses Tracy for some abuse out there. Back in, Tracy gets a sunset flip for two, but Hayes puts him down again with a clothesline. He goes for the DDT and Tracy fights him off and makes the comeback with the back elbow, which became his finisher in SMW years later as the Jawjacker. Smothers goes up, but Jimmy Garvin runs in for the DQ at 15:30 after this shockingly long match that seemed to be destined for a draw. Well this was certainly a match that happened. **

Well no hints of Sting’s big challenger yet but I’m sure that’s coming up soon.