What the World Was Watching: WWF Superstars – 07.13.96

Sid laughs and screams into the camera “Guess who’s back?”

Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect, and Jim Ross are today’s commentary team, taped once again from LaCrosse, Wisconsin.

Opening Contest: The Bodydonnas (w/Cloudy) (12-4) defeat Todd Becker & Brock Wagner when Zip pins Becker after the super hurricanrana-flying butt drop combination at 2:20:

In the split screen, Skip thanks fans for offering to be their manager and Zip notes that conditions are going to get more cloudy than sunny. Cloudy adds that she is going to take the Bodydonnas back to the top. WWF Tag Team Champions the Smoking Gunns and Sunny walk down the aisle as the squash proceeds but no interaction between the In Your House 9: International Incident opponents occurs. The Bodydonnas finish remains too convoluted as Becker ends up too far from the corner after Skip’s super hurricanrana and Zip’s flying butt splash barely hits.

After a recap of the jettisoning of the Ultimate Warrior from the In Your House six-man tag team match, Jim Cornette does a taped promo complaining about Sid’s substitution into the match. Cornette is more composed than Monday Night RAW, confident that his team can win a gang fight in Canada.

T.L. Hopper is shown fixing a shower backstage.

Home Improvement Match: T.L. Hopper beats Duke Droese (7-5) after Down the Drain at 4:45:

As noted before, Hopper was Tony Anthony, a longtime veteran of Southern promotions. A trainee of Steve Keirn and Ron Wright, Anthony started his career in 1980, serving as an enhancement worker in Mid-Atlantic before migrating to NWA Central States, Continental, NWA Alabama, and the CWA/USWA. While part of the CWA he became Heavyweight champion in 1989 and won the Tag Team titles three times. Anthony found his greatest success over the next three years in Smoky Mountain Wrestling, competing as the Dirty White Boy and winning all of its major titles, including three reigns as Heavyweight champion. His signing was due to Jim Cornette’s influence and his gimmick was a tribute to his father, who worked as a plumber.

Hopper’s theme music is the sound of a toilet flushing. Exhilarating stuff. Even though the match is billed as a home improvement match it is just a standard bout. Demonstrating its lack of stakes, McMahon leads the announcers to talk more about the Ultimate Warrior’s suspension. Ross adds later that Hopper will face Marc Mero on RAW. For his part, Perfect makes bathroom puns, noting that it is ironic that Hopper’s first opponent is named “Dumpster” and that he numbers his moves “one and two.” The match is a sub-standard affair as Hopper’s offense is limited. Droese’s attempt at the Trash Compactor is countered as Hopper gets off of his opponent’s shoulders and Hopper wins with a brainbuster that Ross dubs “Down the Drain.” Rating: *

After the bell, Hopper grabs his plunger Betsy and shoves it onto Droese’s mouth. The humiliation serves as the end of the line for the Droese character, concluding the trash man’s two-year run. Droese left on his own accord, tired of the WWF’s travel schedule. He would never return full-time to a major promotion, although he would come back for WrestleMania X-Seven in 2001.

Dok Hendrix’s Slam Jam offers up a promo by WWF Champion Shawn Michaels, Intercontinental Champion Ahmed Johnson, and Sid. Michaels never provides a good explanation for why he forgives Sid for turning on him the previous year, only saying that at least Sid is a reliable partner. Sid likens himself to Albert Einstein as Einstein was smart but eccentric. Sid also says that Michaels has given him a second chance at being the master and ruler of the world.

Mankind (9-0) defeats Jerry Fox via submission to the Mandible Claw at 2:45:

Mankind spends the squash mauling Fox’s face, raking it numerous times. Perfect talks about the latest WWF Magazine, suggesting that Mankind may get a manager named “Jimmy.” Ross insists that it will not be him. Mankind gets a reaction from a stump-puller piledriver and after that he finishes Fox with the Mandible Claw. Fox does some convulsions after the hold is released to sell its paralytic effects.

Ross does an in-ring promo with Jake Roberts, who will face Mankind at In Your House. He is asked about Jerry Lawler first, though, and Roberts talks about how Lawler is not going to stop him from trying to talk about God or warn people about drugs and alcohol. When it comes to Mankind, Roberts likens his opponent to the demons he once fought and he frames their battle as the light against the darkness. Mankind teases a confrontation by coming down the aisle but referees and officials prevent it. In anticipation of a fight, Roberts gets Revelation out of the bag and Mankind backs off.

Alex Porteau (0-1) pins Barry Horowitz (1-6) after an abdominal stretch into a roll up at 2:51:

Porteau appeared earlier this year as an enhancement talent and he receives a small upgrade as the WWF gimmicks him as an amateur wrestler, joining the host of new talents that have made their debut on the B-show in recent weeks. Porteau is assigned the theme music given to the Steiner Brothers during their 1993-1994 run and is nicknamed “The Pug.” He does not have a lot of energy in a split screen promo before the match, talking about how he is in the WWF to prove himself. Matching Porteau against Horowitz for his new debut is a weird choice as many fans still like Horowitz, working up a chant for him. A clean technical match develops and Horowitz outclasses the newcomer until Porteau ties him up in an abdominal stretch, transitions it to a roll up, and Horowitz cannot kick out. The combatants shake hands after the bout. Like many of these characters, this was a poor debut as Horowitz looked better. Maybe the WWF should be giving Horowitz a better gimmick and let him do something instead of sacrificing him in matches like this.

There is a recap of how Freddie Joe Floyd beat Justin Bradshaw two weeks ago. Surprisingly, the WWF does not edit the finish to make it look better. Ross talks with Floyd backstage. Floyd does a generic babyface promo that he is going to give today’s match his best shot. Bradshaw and Zebekiah fire back elsewhere in the arena. Zebekiah makes a funny quip about how Bradshaw will beat “Bobby Joe Floyd or whomever he is” and Bradshaw yells about looking forward to throwing some punches Floyd’s way.

Justin Bradshaw (w/Zebekiah) (10-4-1) beats Freddie Joe Floyd (1-0) after two lariats at 6:02 shown:

True to his word, Bradshaw gets in the ring and takes the fight to Floyd. Floyd has a nice sell after taking a Bradshaw big boot on the apron, flying into the guardrail. Even though Floyd takes a long beating, he mixes in a few fluke near-falls and has a few spurts where he throws punches, keeping the crowd behind him. However, there is no upset for a second time as Floyd is caught with a lariat stumbling out of the corner. Bradshaw pulls Floyd up at two. Usually that backfires on a heel but not today as Bradshaw simply stands Floyd up, mows him down with a second lariat, and gets his win back. The win also ends Bradshaw’s three match losing streak. Rating: *½

Floyd is branded on the side of the face by Zebekiah after the match. Bradshaw adds a few blows as well, causing Savio Vega to make the save by grabbing the branding iron and forcing the heels to leave the ring.

The Slam Jam provides more In Your House hype. Goldust, with Marlena, quotes Out of the Past and notes that like many sequels, this will be the end of his series with the Undertaker. Steve Austin rants about how Marc Mero is going to pay for causing him to get stitches at King of the Ring.

The Sudden Death Slam of the Week is the British Bulldog powerslamming Phineas Godwinn on RAW.

Brian Pillman joins the announce desk, telling them that he loves them all because the WWF rescued him.

Tune in next week to see Marc Mero face old rival Hunter Hearst Helmsley!

The Last Word: The quality of the B-show is trending downward because the influx of non-exciting gimmicks. The WWF needed roster depth to better compete with WCW but this was not a good way to do it. Nothing on today’s show was good in the ring but at least Superstars is still a vehicle for advancing some lower tier feuds.

The next set of WWF house shows took place in the Northeast. Here were the results of a few of those shows, courtesy of thehistoryofwwe.com:

Portland, Maine – Portland Civic Center – July 13, 1996 (4,536; 3,314 paid): Justin Bradshaw pinned Bob Holly after the lariat…The Bodydonnas beat WWF Tag Team Champions the Smoking Gunns, the New Rockers, and the Godwinns in a non-title elimination match…Marc Mero pinned Hunter Hearst Helmsley…Steve Austin defeated Savio Vega in a no disqualification match…Owen Hart pinned Jake Roberts…Goldust defeated Intercontinental Champion Ahmed Johnson via reverse decision. Ahmed pinned Goldust after a spinebuster but kept beating him up after the bell so the initial result was voided…Sid (substituting for the Ultimate Warrior) pinned the British Bulldog after the powerbomb in less than 60 seconds…The Undertaker pinned Mankind…WWF Champion Shawn Michaels defeated Vader after Sweet Chin Music.

Bangor, Maine – Bangor Auditorium – July 14, 1996 (2,022): Justin Bradshaw beat Bob Holly…The Bodydonnas defeated WWF Tag Team Champions the Smoking Gunns, the Godwinns, and the New Rockers in a non-title elimination match…Steve Austin defeated Savio Vega in a no disqualification match…Owen Hart pinned Jake Roberts after hitting him with his arm cast. After the match, Roberts DDT’d Owen…The Undertaker pinned Mankind after the Tombstone…Intercontinental Champion Ahmed Johnson beat Goldust after the Pearl River Plunge…Marc Mero pinned Hunter Hearst Helmsley…Sid (substituting for the Ultimate Warrior) defeated the British Bulldog despite interference from Owen Hart…WWF Champion Shawn Michaels pinned Vader after Sweet Chin Music.

Backstage News*: The WWF officially suspended the Ultimate Warrior on July 8, with Sid taking the Warrior’s remaining bookings through In Your House. There is still a belief that the Warrior might return although he has not agreed to pay the $250,000 appearance bond that the WWF is demanding. If the Warrior agrees, he will probably be written back into storylines on the July 22 edition of Monday Night RAW, which will take place in Seattle, Washington. There was an angle planned for the July 15 edition of RAW where the Warrior, Shawn Michaels, and Ahmed Johnson avenged the Warrior’s beatdown by Camp Cornette but that will be edited off the show.

-There are mixed feelings about Sid’s return as people on the roster resent him being pushed heavily despite a track record of being flaky. Sid is doing one-minute squashes on house shows because his doctors have warned him not to take bumps due to a neck injury that was bothering him earlier in the year.

-The WWF will make some changes to its television product in September as it continues to lose syndication markets. Expect a bigger shift to a cable television model.

-The WWF will avoid running shows in Boston for the time being because the new Fleet Center is charging too much for rent and labor. There will be a pivot to shows at the Worcester Centrum.

-Internationally, the WWF will do two simultaneous tours in December. One group of talent will head to Korea, Australia, Singapore, and the Philippines. The other group will head to the United Kingdom and the United Arab Emirates.

-The WWF’s August 24 show at Toronto’s Exhibition Stadium is being billed as “WWF X Press” as a nod to the WWF’s Big Event that took place in Toronto in 1986. The card will be headlined by WWF Champion Shawn Michaels defending against Goldust in a ladder match.

-In talent relations news, the British Bulldog has been offered a five-year contract. The five-year offer may become standard as Vince McMahon wants to avoid more defections of big talent to WCW. A contract has also been sent to Barry Windham. The 1-2-3 Kid was released from his contract and he is expected to go to WCW.

*Backstage news is provided courtesy of Dave Meltzer’s Wrestling Observer for July 15 and 22.

Up Next: Monday Night RAW for July 15!

And if you would like to read a compiled breakdown of 1990-1995 WWF, 1993-1995 ECW, or of various promotions in 1995, check out my Amazon author page to purchase e-books or paperback copies!