FMW New Year Generation Night 8 01/16/98

Attendance: 1,850
Broadcast date: 02/22/98

Previously In FMW…

Another Samurai TV watchalong, this time with Yukihiro Kanemura who’s dressed like he’s about to go out and buy some crack.

Mr. Pogo #2 (ZEN) vs. Naohiko Yamazaki

Yamazaki is a trainee who would be out of wrestling before FMW was. Smart idea putting a Young Un against Pogo #2 as they’re on an even playing field when it comes to skill. Match is OK. Pogo #2 ends with a Camel Clutch at 5:56

Kaori Nakayama vs. Miss Mongol (Team No Respect)

FMW’s women’s division has been on life support since Megumi Kudo’s retirement in 1997 but I guess Mongol joining Team No Respect means…something?

Wonky action that resembles comedy but isn’t intended as such starts us off. Kaori is very unconvincing selling Mongol’s submissions and strikes because she looks as if she’s about to start laughing any second. Mongol misses a running rolling senton as Kanemura laughs at the state of this match so far. Kaori gets a two count from a crossbody off the top before Mongol uses Fuyuki’s falling butt drop because she gets all of TNR’s offence now following the rules of Mega Man. Doesn’t end the match though. Rubbish STO and a Twisting Body Attack barely makes impact for two before the match finally starts getting good as Kaori executes two very high angled DDTs to impress the crowd. Mongol starts wrestling desperately by repeatedly going for backslides until Kaori converts one into LA MAHISTRAL for two. Mongol tries an Awesome Bomb (hey Mike’s not in TNR) which Kaori escapes by falling out of it before landing a wicked top rope Frankensteiner and Northern Lights Fisherwoman’s Suplex to finish it at 10:36.

This started off amateurish but luckily got upgraded to a better hospital to be presented as “watchable.”

Post-match Crusher Maedomari shows up to offer to team up with Kaori to deal with Shark Tsuchiya who has declared war on the FMW wrestlers. That’s what it says on Cagematch anyway, FMW have given the women as much time on TV as Tony Khan usually does.

Super Leather vs. Hideki Hosaka (ZEN)

Leather threatens the ref with a good time so the ref takes him on his offer and the pair of them engage in a brief sumo battle as Leather’s decided to go the comedy route. Still better than Texas Chain Saw Massacre 4. Hosaka clotheslines him out the ring and follows with a smooth Tope as he’s wearing Bret Hart’s gear and he knows he has big shoes to fill.

He then slips on a Frankensteiner as the commentators lose their mind laughing at him. The Japanese fucking LOVE IT when wrestlers botch. Leather isn’t a fan of parodies and comes back with a meaty Superplex and Bulldog’s Running Powerslam for two. Hosaka knows how to kick out of his Brother-in-Law’s finisher. A Dragon Sleeper holds Leather at bay until he has enough and Leather finishes with a Brainbuster at 8:54. Eh, not a bad match here between two limited guys that were trying. Reminded me of Big Vito vs. Reno.

The Gladiator Mike Awesome (ZEN) vs. Ricky Fuji

Team Canada explodes! Presumably politely. Fuji keeps his former mate grounded with armbars before Awesome has enough and starts throwing his weight around at half-speed. Awesome still flies respectfully high when delivering leg drops and splashes. Awesome teases an Awesome Bomb on the outside but Fuji cuts that off with a Moxley-esque tope. Fuji stays on offence with a Finlay Roll before Awesome manages an Awesome Bomb/Awesome Splash combo for two. The air on that bastard splash, bloody hell. Running Awesome Bomb ends it at 15:10.

House Show levels of effort here but Awesome’s in his prime so his offence looks tremendous even when he can’t be arsed.

Koji Nakagawa & Tetsuhiro Kuroda (ZEN) vs. Kodo Fuyuki & Hido (Team No Respect)

Fuyuki-Gun merged with Gannosuke/Kanemura at the last show to create the Team No Respect mega-team, hence why Fuyuki & Hido are suddenly friends. Which means rising star Kuroda has the advantage over Hido. Nakagawa is kind of on the rise but also kind of not so Fuyuki takes a few shots before kicking Kuroda in the balls. Hido takes a decent pounding and stretching before TNR start firing off low blows and sending Nakagawa into the chairs outside. TNR land the AWA Special and continue to wear Nakagawa down until he somehow belly-to-back suplexes Fuyuki. Fuyuki’s not ballooned up like he would later but he’s still chunky enough for that to be impressive. What isn’t impressive is this match which is going nowhere slow.

Nakagawa gets locked in the Stretch Plumb but Kuroda saves him for the hot tag. Kuroda nearly pins Fuyuki with a lariat but then Nakagawa dropkicks him so hard he lands in the tag corner so Hido can come in. Match resets now as Hido plays heel in peril but refuses to lose to a double Brainbuster. Kuroda gets sent into the chairs and takes a mighty head-over-arse bump and that’s enough to distract Hido who falls victim to a Victory Roll at 15:21.

Solid but unspectacular. I wish I had more to say about it but here we are.

FMW Six Man Street Fight Titles

Hayabusa & Masato Tanaka & Hisakatsu Oya vs. Mr. Gannosuke & Yukihiro Kanemura & Jado (Team No Respect)

Wait but…ZEN won the Six Man Street Fight Title shot at the last show? I guess we’re pretending that didn’t happen because Onita doesn’t work the smaller shows.

TNR bum-rush the champs during the introductions to start this one off hot. Oya is wearing a white shirt and blue jeans and it is not a good look for him. With his lack of hair he resembles a Trailer Park Boys character who was rejected for being too much of a degenerate. Everyone gets a chance to start off with everyone as there’s a lot of heat here already. Gannosuke just defeated Tanaka in a wild match for the Double Titles so they go at it fast & heavy with Tanaka so mad that he no-sells a low blow to powerslam his blond foe. Hayabusa also hates his former friend Gannosuke so the masked one ignores his chops to blast him in the face. Jado is kinda just there so he takes Hayabusa’s buttery smooth armdrags and dives like a good boy.

Oya stops drinking White Claw to start a big ol’ brawl outside with Kanemura and Tanaka engaging in a chair duel. Tanaka and Kanemura have wonderful chemistry together as the chunky brawler is able to keep up with the Tornado DDTs and Dragon Screw leg whips being thrown his way. Team FMW keep on working Kanemura’s leg in their preferred ways (Oya’s ground work and Hayabusa’s springboard stomps) until Kanemura teases another brawl outside but it’s only to distract his opponents so he can tag out. Ha!

Tanaka gets isolated in the corner and gets absolutely flattened from a Kanemura back senton which sounded like dropping a table out of a two storey window. TNR’s second AWA Special of the night connects as I wonder why they scheduled the two TNR tag matches back-to-back. Kanemura mocks Tanaka by landing a Rolling Elbow before knocking all the other team off the apron so Gannosuke can attempt a…Spinning Toe Hold? These two guys were having a wonderful time being silly bastards. Huuuuge back senton off the top can’t put away Tanaka because he refuses to lose to these jerks. Kanemura sends Tanaka through a table with a giant top rope splash but all Tanaka does is complain about his bad arm. Gannosuke’s Falcon Arrow can’t put away Tanaka because Hayabusa runs in to yell THAT’S MY MOVE, I DON’T KNOW YOU. Hido is very cocky after his mates have done all the work and proceeds to lariat Tanaka inside-out because he’s not bumped enough in this match.

He still kicks out to spite his foes who then attempt to run a train on him in the corner, with Tanaka finally coming back to smash Kanemura with a table piece. This allows Hayabusa to finally tag in and kill Hido with an Asai Moonsault, Swanton, Lionsault, Dragon Suplex Onto Head and a Falcon Arrow. Gannosuke saves the poor bastard from being pinned so Hayabusa pancakes him with a Twisting Body Attack to kick start another brawl. Oya tries to sneak a win with a quick lariat but Kanemura gets a chair shot, which Oya responds to by drilling him with one of his gruesome backdrop drivers. Gannosuke takes one too which allows Tanaka to tag in despite his bad elbow because he wants to destroy Kanemura too much to stand on the apron. LET THE HATE FLOW THROUGH YOU. He’s so mad he barely connects on a Tornado DDT but the crowd doesn’t care as he powerbombs Kanemura for two. Team FMW think the end is coming so they take out their opponents as Tanaka lands directly on his head from a German and shrugs it off to lariat Kanemura again.

Jado tags back in to go lariat-for-lariat with Tanaka as the crowd are wild now. Oya murders Jado with another sickening backdrop but Gannosuke interrupts and just when you think this match is never going to end, Jado casually rolls Oya into the Jado Clutch for the pin-fall at 20:01 as Hayabusa is held back.

Hell yeah, this was everything great about this period with the storylines mixing in with the action so everyone got a chance to get their shit in while building the plots. I mean those plots aren’t anything more sophisticated than “these dudes hate each other” but that’s good enough for me. Team No Respect being dickheads is an easy way to get heat from the crowd but also means wrestlers who are fine in-ring but not necessarily great characters like Tanaka and Oya work really well when their opponents are as OTT as these lot. Great main event.

Afterwards the new champs strip down to their pants and dub themselves THE BRIEF BROTHERS as promoter Shoichi Arai watches on in disgust. He can’t believe Team No Respect could be this disrespectful.

Overall: Big fat fun main event and fuck-all else.

Next Week: Gannosuke starts annoying Shinzaki!

I’ve been Maffew.