All Japan Pro Wrestling Champion Carnival April 20th 2024

Hey guys, I’m back after some technical difficulties of my own making but we got some more fantastic AJPW Champion Carnival action coming up for you.

Hikaru Sato & MUSASHI vs. Rising HAYATO & Ryo Inoue

Background: So MUSASHI was the prior challenger for HAYATO’s World Junior title and Sato has been a general thorn in Rising and Ryo’s sides as well. It’s youth vs. experience with Sato and MUSASHI being the vets and HAYATO and Inoue being in their 20s.

The Match: Basic technical stuff from HAYATO and MUSASHI to start as nobody is really busting their ass. Inoue and Sato trade martial arts sequences. HAYATO tags in again and does a Poetry In Motion and I’m starting to be disturbed by the Jeff Hardy comparisons between him and the Charismatic Enigma, MUSASHI returns with his 2000s American indie guy offense and this is all pretty basic in a not very good way. MUSASHI gets a few German Suplexes on Ryo to set up the Frog Splash for the win.

**

Just a pretty basic match and nobody was really trying very hard. Still they know what they’re doing and they hit what they needed to hit.

Post-match MUSASHI cuts a promo and Hikaru interrupts and seems irate about something.

A Block Match: Shotaro Ashino vs. Ren Ayabe

Background: So because of the time Shotaro missed last year and Ren’s relative newness, I think this might be the first time they’ve matched up. Beyond that, both guys are coming off a win. Also I think Ayabe’s theme is growing on more, it’s very much a “prelude to an emotional moment in a movie” music.

The Match: Lockup won by Ren into the ropes, Ayabe teases a strike but gives the break. There’s a funny spot where a kneeling Ren is about as tall as Shotaro and they trade forearm strikes as it’s been ALL Ayabe so far. Ashino powders outside and starts working on Ren’s leg against the ringpost but is stymied again as Ayabe tears him apart outside, kicking him over the guardrail. Moving back in the ring, Shotaro bumps all over the place as he’s literally being beaten pillar to post. In the process Ayabe gets a pretty cool hanging full-nelson, as he’s tall enough that when he lifts up Shotaro legs literally dangle. Shotaro finally ducks a Yakuza kick and gets a few dragon screws to start working the leg over in earnest, Ashino’s pretty dope Karelin lift sets up the ankle lock but Ayabe blocks it before it gets locked in and he counters with a dropkick as both guys are selling like they’re dead. Ren’s Yakuza kick sets up the missile dropkick into the bridging Dragon Suplex, but Shotaro escapes the spinning gourdbuster and locks in the ankle lock, after rolling with Ren to keep the hold on, Shotaro is kicked free but after dodging another charge from Ayabe Ashino gets the hold in again, grapevines the leg, and Ren taps.

**¼

The ending was decent, as the craftier vet was able to take apart his bigger opponents base, but Ren’s offense is still so tentative and his selling is rough. Clearly a physical marvel but the in-ring is not yet there for me, and while Shotaro bumped around really generously for the bigger guy, his selling was still “oh I’m dead…okay I’m fine again to do moves now.” Not a good match in the slightest but it was fine enough and the hot finish was worth a quarter star for me.

B Block Match: Suwama vs. Hartley Jackson

Background: So they’re both big, burly, barrel-chested and thick-bellied guys. Unsure if they have any history beyond that.

The Match: They lockup and break two times without either being able to get an advantage, but on the third attempt Suwama instead grabs a headlock. Next up comes the shoulderblocks which are a stalemate until Hartley finally knocks Suwama down. So far the “two big bulls locking horns” thing has been pretty fun. As Hartley has established his physical dominance over Suwama, Hartley keeps telling one particular fan to shut up as they cheer. Hartley beats on Suwama some more in the corner, but can’t get the fireman’s carry and Suwama uses his speed (?!) to get a jumping shoulderblock and then a belly-to-belly suplex, but only gets an one count. Suwama’s choke sleeper gets broken and Hartley gets a Death Valley Driver into some hard clotheslines. Suwama is wobble-legged as he crawls up the ref to get to his feet and when Hartley goes for the powerbomb he gets backdropped, a few Suwama clotheslines set up the choke sleeper and the submission win.

**½

I’ll be honest, Hartley didn’t show me much here, he was big and had some fun moments yelling at the fans, his stuff looked lighter than you’d hope for and his heat segment on Suwama wasn’t much to write home about. That said, Suwama was VERY good and it’s interesting a guy who has been a sort of physical bully to much of the roster get manhandled his first two matches and had to rely on his deep bag of veteran tricks to win the day. Interesting subplot in the tournament so far, we’ll see where it goes.

Cyrus, Davey Boy Smith Jr. & Ryuki Honda vs. Dan Tamura, Hideki Sekine & Rei Saito

Background: So we’re mostly familiar with these other guys, but Hideiki Sekine is new. A MMA guy of the gimmicky variety, he is nicknamed Shrek for uh…well just google him. He’s kinda fun as a roided freak but he’s not exactly GOOD.

The Match: Cyrus before the match calls out Rei Saito by yelling “I WANT YEW!” and then shoves him a few times. All I’m saying is that if your favorite version of wrestling involved big, weird looking dudes just kinda yelling and shoving and throwing shoulderblocks I’d really give All Japan a shot. Rei and Cyrus do indeed start and we get a lockup that goes nowhere so they shove and shove until Cyrus just picks Rei up and runs him into the corner. Rei does his battle shriek and then Cyrus gets air with a single-leg dropkick (?!) and they tag in Ryuki and Hideki. Hideki immediately drops to his back in the Inoki-pose (yes I know it’s a judo thing too) and Ryuki falls for it and gets trapped in the triangle. After a ropebreak, Ryuki seems quite upset at the trickery, and they agree to charge each other instead…and then Ryuki does a drop toehold on Hideki and does a few rounds of the rope choke. After Sekine knocks down Honda in response, Rei comes in and does the wildman chops in the corner and a sidewalk slam, Ryuki gets the spear and in comes Cyrus to take out Rei. Quick tags as Hideki comes in to bounce off of Cyrus a few times before he fires up and the third shoulderblock…also fails, but he yells for one more, which Cyrus agrees too…and then Hideki runs around Cyrus and gets a big German instead, okay, for a kinda nothing six-man tag they’re at least filling it with fun spots. Now it’s time for Cyrus’s team to demolish Dan Tamura, but Davey Boy and Cyrus bicker and Rei takes them out, now Rei’s team are triple-teaming DBSJ. But it’s breaking down in Hamamatsu as Hideki goes for Ryuki’s eyes or face and Davey Boy isolates Tamura and pins him with a powerbomb. Funny shot to end it as you see wrestlers brawling in the foreground as Davey Boy gets the win in the focused shot.

**¾

I won’t go as far as calling it Good (that’s what a *** match means to me) but it was very fine, the actual work was a bit too unfocused but they had some funny gags and running bits that kept a pretty basic, whatever six-man undercard tag more engaging than it should have been.

The brawling continues post-match as Cyrus once again brutalizes the poor ringboy. My goodness, what a jerk that Cyrus is.

A Block Match: Kuroshio TOKYO Japan vs. Yuma Aoyagi

Background: Well these are probably the two trickiest guys in the company, and Yuma has previously trolled Kuroshio by wearing a jacket and doing some of his signature spots, so I expect some silliness in this match.

The Match: TOKYO Japan does a slightly pared down entrance then usual, and of course Yuma decides to come out in his vest before going back in the locker room and emerging with a suit jacket in his signature blue. Kuroshio of course sells this by being hopping mad and punching the turnbuckle and kicking the ropes. To get the fans back on his side, Kuroshio hops down and does his “pick up the kid” bit…but the baby isn’t having it and instantly starts to tear up, causing the crowd to instantly boo Kuroshio (the dad however seems to find it hilarious). Yuma runs through his version of Kuroshio’s pre-match acrobatic routines and does the jacket pose after all of them…and then Kuroshiro decides enough is enough and goes for the jacket punch! Yuma responds in kind and whoops on Kuroshio around the ring, before Kuroshio runs away and baits Yuma into a strike. Kuroshio then grabs a coat hanger and hooks Aoyagi to one of the lighting rigs to go for a countout win. Yuma beats it back inside but then hooks Kuroshio to the rig and bails to the ring for a countout win and Kuroshio BARELY slides in and is blown up from the sprinting. Kuroshio finally takes over by snapping Yuma’s arm over the top rope and goes to work. Repeated pins and a spinaroonie (?!!?) get some heel heat on Kuroshio as he goes to school on Aoyagi’s arm. Yuma makes his comeback with the jacket punch and a crossbody and after some counters a German suplex but Kuroshio gets the cross armbar to regain control. After trading some rollups they both powder and then proceed to roll under the ring for some time. Eventually Yuma emerges with Kuroshio’s jacket and the countout win. In the aftermath it’s revealed that Yuma managed to use his own jacket to hogtie Kuroshio under the ring.

***¾

Well I thought it was hilarious, and Kuroshio got to wrestle heel in a way he rarely does. And I like that Yuma’s first two matches really play into the Insidious Fighter thing, he’s beating guys with Bugs Bunny routines and it’s quality stuff.

B Block Match: Lord Crewe vs. Yuma Anzai

Background: Yeah nothing really significant between these guys given how little I know about Lord and how short Anzai’s career has been. But I think it’s one of Anzai’s first matches against a gaijin.

The Match: Nice crisp lockup to start as Lord almost backs Yuma to the ropes before Anzai comes back and gets the clean break. Second attempt goes Crewe’s way and he gives the reluctant clean break before flattening Yuma with a shoulderblock. Anzai with a dropkick but when he goes up Crewe kicks him off the top and works him over outside and then inside with his white boy kung fu. I will say that at least Crewe does these big exaggerated strikes that are very clearly not trying to be MMA stuff, he does these big wind-up bodyshots and these stop, prep, and strike kicks. Crewe beats on Yuma in the corner and then expresses doubt that he’s the champion. Yuma comes back with a belly-to-belly suplex, a jumping forearm smash into the corner and then a double-arm suplex before they set up the strike exchange which Crewe wins with the tornado kick and a scary-looking German Suplex. Yuma counters the Catatonic with a rollup into his own German and then the Jumbo knee and then the half-Electric Chair powerbomb.

**½

Just a fine match, fine story and Yuma looked dominant in it, took a beating and came back with his stuff for the win. Crewe feels like JAG though he has some flair at least and Yuma still needs to hit the notes between the notes. Still, absolutely a fine match.

Post-match Crewe swears that he’s going to unlock something that Japan hasn’t seen yet and the Merciless One is awake…okay now.

B Block Match: Hideki Suzuki vs. Jun Saito

Background: Hideki had the tag-titles after Jun and his brother were stripped of them and then Jun beat him for those belts again. First match for Hideki in the CC and second match for Jun who is coming off a loss. In addition both guys kind of have a smooth, laidback jerk gimmick. With Jun being the cool brother (in a few ways) and Hideki is never exactly high-energy himself.

The Match: Hideki comes out and does his usual “I’m too bored to care about what’s happening here” entrance gimmick and Jun of course hams it up to the crowd and poses and wipes the hair back. Jun walks around the ring nonchalantly to start and Hideki extends a hand that Jun slaps away. They don’t lock up in the traditional way, but they kinda hug as Jun backs Hideki into the ropes and he loudly calls for a rope break that Jun eventually gives. Jun then preens to the crowd as some women whistle at him. Jun gets a headlock and works it for a while before clobbering Hideki with a shoulderblock, they fight over hiptosses they each stuff and Jun finally throws Suzuki outside where Hideki then takes the wimpiest bump off a whip into the barricade I’ve ever seen. Jun then chokes Hideki with a shirt. Hideki eventually reverses and stomps on Jun a bit outside, then he stomps on Jun inside. Jun then comes back with his stuff and Hideki somehow manages to take a wimpy bump off of a body slam. They trade control of the match and Jun is trying to do something by posing to the crowd and doing some rope-assisted cheating, but both guys are playing heel and it’s just rough as the crowd is quiet. Hideki gets a front chancery but can’t lock it in. Jun counters the guillotine attempt into a delayed brainbuster in a pretty cool spot but the chokeslam only gets 2.9. Hideki is so out of sorts he adjusts his trunks as he counters the Psycho Break, gets a dropkick, and then gets the cradle tombstone for 2.9. Jun comes back and lariat (with Hideki doing a Janetty bump!), Psycho Break, 1-2-3.

*¼

The finish at least had some heat, but man that match was long and dull and the crowd mostly didn’t care since both guys are cool heels. Jun at least has continued to diversify his offense but Hideki is mostly so ungenerous a bumper and seller it doesn’t get heat on anybody and Hideki’s offense is mostly him just laying on guys. But Hideki took two actual bumps in a row at the end so I guess I gotta say something nice.

A Block Match: Kento Miyahara vs. Hokuto Omori

Background: They’ve had a few scraps in the past but there’s no significant heat between them. Hokuto was Nakajima’s protege/second of a sort in All Japan and Kento and Nakajima are MASSIVE rivals but that’s never really been played up.

The Match: Hokuto continues to do his twin thing with one Hokuto in red and the other Hoktuo in blue and they both have horse masks on. I will say that whoever they have for the second Hokuto is pretty good cause I can’t tell who is the real one. And this time it’s the blue Hokuto as he sneak attacks Kento…for all of 15 seconds before Miyahara cuts him off and Omori powders. Kento then starts jawing with fake!Hokuto who then olds Miyahara’s ankles for a second Hokuto sneak attack and now we’re in business. Kento is run into the barricade, choked with a towel, and the crowd is LIVID at Omori for this. Kento comes back with the repeated headbutts as he kicks Hokuto’s butt around the arena…and then Kento takes a break to wipe the sweat from his brow with one of his cheer towels he gets from a fan, what a worker that man is. Hokuto begs off as his second tries to protect him but the butt kicking continues. Hokuto gets a DDT on the ringside mats and throws him through everything ringside and in the crowd, chairs, the barricade, and the ring post. And Hokuto finally can fully work over the Best of the Best. Kento fires back with forearms but Omori catches the big boot and kicks him low. Hokuto takes over with a choke into a pin, but Kento fires back again, now with the basement dropkick into the low dropkick. Both of them are out, but as the crowd continues to chant Kento’s name he does the full Hulk Up, posing as he rises to his feet, but as he comes in with a big charge into the corner Hokuto tosses the ref in Kento’s way! Hokuto’s second throws in a chair and Omori whallops Kento with it, but there’s still no ref! Omori revives him and they trade corner charges and are now duking it out in the middle of the ring. Hokuto gets the KO forearm and Kento is out on his feet! Hokuto keeps throwing them and the ropes are the only thing keeping Miyahara up, Kento comes off the ropes but Omori Germans him! Hokuto goes for the Fisherman’s Driver but MIyahara gets the brainbuster! Kento starts with the Blackout Knees, but Hokuto gets the pop-up dick kick, the Dragon Suplex, and the rolling elbow before going for his Buster again. Kento slips out and after Hokuto almost wipes out the ref, Kento goes low (with stupendous mugging to the crowd afterwards) and another Blackout Knee doesn’t do it, but the Shutdown German does and Kento gets the win.

****

Almost as ridiculous as the Yuma/Kuroshio match, this was a different sort of goofy as this was full on 80s Hogan silliness as Hokuto plays the dirtbag heel to perfection and once again Omori is done-in by a low kick from his opponent after spending the match abusing other wrestlers testicles.

Post-match Kento steps on Hokuto’s chest to pose in victory but Omori’s second begs him not to, as Kento yells at him…Omori shoves Kento into the ref and gets a two for one nutshot as he batters both their balls.

And that’s it and we’re outta here!