Howdy!
I was watching the Triangle Derby, but I really was not planning to cover the Final…..and then this show happened.
Let’s watch some wrestling, shall we?
Stardom Triangle Derby Finals – March 4th, 2023
Skipping the pre-show matches, although not without some protest – who puts Utami on the pre-show? That’s like putting Baby in the corner! You just don’t do it!
Club Venus (Mina Shirakawa/Mariah May) & Waka Tsukiyama vs Donna Del Mondo (Maika, Mai Sakurai, Thekla)
I do adore me some Thekla, as always. She starts with Mariah, who I’m not as high on but is growing on me to a certain extent. They do a fun sequence before tagging out to allow Maika and Mina to come in and do a better one. Maika ends up YOUR face-in-peril for a bit before just carrying Waka on her back to the corner to make the tag. That made me laugh, especially as Waka just has this look of intensity while she screams and tries to hold down a sleeper, but gets walked to the corner anyway. Waka’s tiny as hell, but she’s got some real fire and the crowd seems to dig her. Match goes for a bit after that as it’s Waka’s turn to get absolutely clobbered, including a giant Falcon Arrow from Mai. Waka hangs on for a WHILE, but Mai eventually hits a Harlem Hangover to finish things. (Donna Del Mondo over Club Venus/Waka, pinfall, 10:20)
THOUGHTS: **3/4. Perfectly fine tag wrestling here with an insane finisher. I could watch Thekla work all day and Waka is going to be really great at taking an ass-kicking for a long time to come, as she can get sympathy heat like crazy. Mina and Himeka are of course great as well.
Oedo Tai (Momo Watanabe, Fukigen Death, Saki Kashima, Natsuko Tora, Ruaka) vs STARS (Mayu Iwatani, Koguma, Hanan, Momo Kohgo, Saya Iida)
You can always run this one, as the factions are almost literally perfect opposition for each other. Koguma and Tora start, and Tora just rolls her eyes before the bell even rings and the cheer routine begins. Tora has enough of that fairly quickly and it’s time for Koguma to take a whuppin’ as Oedo Tai maul her.
From there we settle into a fairly routine 10 wrestler tag, as Mayu gets in and has some fun with Watanabe. Quick tags are the order of the day as everyone comes in here and there to get their stuff in, but honestly it’s just a bunch of moves. All action, but not a great match under the surface stuff. Fukigen pins Kohgo with a roll up to win one for the bad girls. (Oedo Tai over STARS, pinfall, 8:20)
THOUGHTS: **. Not much here, even though Mayu was game.
Cosmic Angels (Tam Nakano, Natsupoi, SAKI) vs God’s Eye (Syuri, MIRAI, Ami Sourei) – Triangle Derby Semi-Final match
Okay, here’s your one-sentence summary of the Triangle Derby. It’s a G-1 tournament for 6-woman tag matches, and we’ll have both semis here and then the Finals will be the main event. So, one one side here, we’ve got God’s Eye, tough bitches who will cripple you. On the other side, you have Cosmic Angels, who are led by Tam Nakano, who more than a few people here wish to cripple.
Tam and Ami start us off but that doesn’t exactly last long until the triple teams begin. Natsupoi in next legally for the Angels, and I like me some Natsupoi, even if I do agree that I’m not really the biggest fan of the Angels’ gimmick in general. But Natsupoi is really good and she has to be as she ends up in the wrong corner, which results in her taking quite the shitkicking from MIRAI and Ami.
Match proceeds at a decent clip until we get the Syuri/Tam showdown for a moment. Natsupoi in against Syuri next, and, look – I totally get why they put the belt on Guilia. I even agree with it, it’s what I would have done, she was the right person, etc. And I also think that Utami is the best woman when you factor in everything (ringwork, charisma, look, etc), but there is nobody, and I mean nobody, who is touching Syuri on work between the ropes. She sells EVERYTHING like it’s the most important thing in the world at that moment, her stuff looks tight and crisp and devastating, she’s just exemplary at this moment in time.
Anyway, we get double dives off the top to the floor from Natsupoi and Tam, into a triple superkick from the Angels for two on Syuri. The God’s Eye women take the Angels to the floor and leave Syuri alone in the ring with Natsupoi, and wastes very little time kicking her face off her face and putting her into a nasty-looking Stretch Muffler for the submission. (God’s Eye over Cosmic Angels, submission, 11:20)
THOUGHTS: ***. This was fine with a good finish, with Syuri and MIRAI carrying things well enough along with Natsupoi.
Prominence (Suzu Suzuki, Risa Sera, Hiragi Kurumi) vs Neo-Stardom Army (Yuu, Nanae Takahashi, Yuna Mizumori) – Triangle Derby Semi-Final match
Prominence are the current 6-woman champs in Stardom, which could make for an interesting finish to this thing if they make the Finals.
Prominence attacks before the bell, because, you know. Fuck them bitches, amiright? Plunder is used immediately including Suzuki fighting Nanae in front of Rossy Ogawa and them almost TOUCHING ROSSY’S HAT, which if removed may end all life as we know it. Who knows what the hell is under that thing? It might unleash some Ark of the Covenant shit ala Raiders. Thankfully, Rossy recoils to save the world.
Back in the ring and Kurumi comes off the top with a missile dropkick on Yuu, who bowls over all 3 of the Prominence women in retaliation. The Army does the stupid (sorry, but I do hate the spot) Yuu spot where they all roll onto the floor onto the Prominence women with rolling splashes.
Match is energetic and fast the whole way, something I greatly appreciate. Suzuki does a fun bit with Nanae where they both no-sell each other before a backdrop driver by Takahashi leads to a Yuu senton and double-team for two. I dunno, the Army is falling into their old tropes here as they just bully the Prominence women and that shouldn’t work because Prominence is filled with violent women who should be able to hold their own; regardless, it’s working because Prominence is really talented and they’re carrying the shit outta this as kind of awkward underdogs to a certain extent.
Everyone in and Prominence continues to get clobbered, taking a cannonball from Yuu in the corner. We end up with Suzu and Yuna in the ring, and Yuna does the big pop-up off a Suzuki German into a lariat that I thought was the end, but Suzuki escapes and rolls her up for the pin. (Prominence over Neo-Stardom Army, pinfall, 10:36)
THOUGHTS: **3/4. I wish I could go higher in that I really liked what Prominence was doing here in selling from underneath, but the Army only has the one match style and this was them beating the shit out of the Prominence women and losing on a banana peel slip. Not how I would book my champs, frankly, and the one-note nature of the Army matches is really starting to become a problem. Yes, they’re bigger and stronger, so what? Give me something to make me think they have another gear out there. Or maybe they don’t actually have that other gear?
Post-match, Suzu has the mic and asks if we really thought Prominence would lose? She insults the Army and asks if God’s Eye is watching, which they are from the back of the arena. Suzu sees them and says that since they’re facing off in the Finals, why not put these belts on the line? God’s Eye hits the ring and Syuri says that of course, they want to go for the straps, and it’s made official! The belts and the tournament will be on the line in the main event!
Chihiro Hashimoto vs Himeka
So, Hashimoto has been running through God’s Eye one at a time, wtih the inevitable showdown against Syuri looming. Himeka, meanwhile, is getting ready to call it a career, having announced her retirement imminently; can she put a stop to Chihiro as an ustoppable force?
Short answer: gonna be a no from me, dawg.
This match rules, my dudes and dudettes. It’s exactly what I want to build up a monster, where she has the power edge over Himeka, but also she has a grappling edge on the mat, something that gives some depth to the match as Himeka has to figure out a way to beat this woman and she just…..can’t. Hashimoto manhandles her to start with a headlock and a throw, but then goes to the mat and slaps on a kneebar for kicks to keep the torture going. It’s not like Himeka is going to need that knee, anyway; she’s retiring! Let Hashimoto have it for the trophy case.
Himeka just sells and sells and sells as she gets caught in an abdominal stretch that she escapes with a judo throw. A few moves in a row only get one after a knee to the face. Boston Crab, but Chihiro makes the ropes relatively easily. They do an excellent clothesline battle that leads to a slugfest, which Himeka WINS, then Himeka gets a back suplex…..but comes off the ropes and gets caught with a German suplex. Crowd chants for Himeka, but Hashimoto catches a high knee and puts her in an anklelock.
Himeka makes the ropes, but eats a lariat almost as soon as she stands. Powerbomb by Hashimoto is so nasty that I wouldn’t have blamed Himeka if she retired on the spot right there, and Chihiro slaps on the anklelock again to get the tapout. (Chihiro Hashimoto over Himeka, submission, 8:52)
THOUGHTS: ***3/4. Perfection. THAT is how you make someone look like the biggest badass ever, in that she took shots from Himeka, including her best, and then powerbombed her into next week and submitted her. It’s a very simple thing to do in that you have a mission but you also don’t want to have her encounter zero resistance, because then the victory means nothing. Too many times, I see monsters doing a squash without the other wrestler doing anything, but here Himeka had her chances and took her shots and wounded Hashimoto, but couldn’t keep her down for much of anything and lost clean. I really enjoyed this one, and I get the feeling that Hashimoto and Syuri are going to tear the roof off.
Hashimoto gets the mic and wishes Himeka peace of mind in retirement. She’s had enough of opponents like Himeka and it’s about time to fight Syuri! Syuri is out now and she wonders if it’s finally her turn to fight Hashimoto? Syuri wants to fight at Yokohoma Arena on April 23rd; what does Chihiro say to that? Hashimoto says that at Yokohoma, they’ll find out who is the strongest. Syuri promises to beat her there, but Hashimoto says that she won’t let Syuri shine in this ring anymore. No matter what ring, Chihiro Hashimoto is the strongest!
Hazuki vs Saya Kamitani (C) – Wonder of Stardom title match
I’ve really enjoyed Hazuki’s work before, so I’m happy to see her here. I give her about 0.00001% chance of winning unless Mina Shirakawa got hit by a bus or something. I was really critical of Saya last time out and I think my criticisms were legit, but at the same time, I think she’s got a ton of talent and just needs to right the ship to a certain extent.
Nice matwork gets us going to start. From there we a lucha sequence and this is looking good so far, with Hazuki in control for a moment. Saya gets sent to the floor and Hazuki follows with a tope. Hazuki puts the boots to Saya and is dominating, now a crossface. Pace is really good and I’m enjoying this one quite a bit to start.
Saya makes her comeback but doesn’t go too over the top like she did last time out, which helps. Big dive over the top by Kamitani! They trade kicks and it appears that Hazuki has a bloody nose now. More kicks as the exchange turns pretty epic, which somehow works for me. Both wrestlers wipe out for the double down now. Spinning heel kick by Saya and she goes up, missile dropkick gets two.
Hazuki makes a comeback with a Michinoku Driver, but that doesn’t last long as Saya hits a Driver of her own. They end up on the top rope and Hazuki gets a superplex! DDT and now a crossface by Hazuki and this is pretty great, actually. Hazuki is absolutely killing it in there and Saya is keeping up.
Hazuki goes up now, senton off the top! 1, 2, NO! Back up she goes, Codebreaker off the top by Hazuki! 1, 2, NO! Brainbuster by Hazuki! 1, 2, NO! Hazuki pulls out a handgun and shoots her in the face from point blank range! 1, 2, NO!
Okay, that last one is just not true. It’s hard to get a gun in Japan.
Saya gets a roll-through for a close nearfall, then a Kamigoye! They slug it out, first from their knees and now up to their feet as Hazuki just WAILS on Saya. Saya reverses into a back suplex with a bridge for two. ‘Rana gets two for Hazuki. Both women are doing an excellent job of just hitting big moves here to pop the crowd on these nearfalls.
Saya now with a few kicks and a cover for a two count. Saya goes for the Star Crusher, hits it! 1, 2, NO! Again, and now she goes up, Firebird splash! 1, 2, NO! Saya can’t believe it, so she does what every wrestler should do in this situation instead of just doing shocked face – she drags Hazuki to the center, hits a Star Crusher, picks her up, hits ANOTHER one, and then pins her. (Saya Kamitani over Hazuki, pinfall, 22:48)
THOUGHTS: ****. This was the best Saya match I’ve seen in literally months, as she did a main event style match with Hazuki here, full of big kickouts, no botches, and a good pace. I know that Dave gave it 4.75 in the Observer and while I strenuously disagree with that (it was too long even with a good pace, just as one reason), I think that 4 is fair and it was a good match for Kamitani, who needed it. Hazuki was absolutely GREAT here, at least in my view.
Saya with the stick post-match now. She says that Hazuki put her life on the line for this title, which is why she was able to fight with such passion. Please try again! She wants her next title defense to be at Yokohoma Arena, and names her opponent as, of course, Mina Shirakawa. Mina comes out now and asks isn’t it kind of late to be nominating her? But still, for her chance to compete on the big stage, thank you. She didn’t lose to Saya and since that fateful day, life for her as a wrestler came to a halt! But Saya kept defending and winning – do you know how frustrating that was for Mina to watch? That move she did at the end, the one that injured Mina, that wasn’t the Phoenix Splash – try to do a proper Phoenix Splash! And then, after that, Mina is going to beat her. April 23rd, will it be her chin? Her teeth? No, at Yokohoma, Mina is going to break Saya’s heart! Prepare yourself! My heart, Saya says? If you can break it, break it! The Golden Phoenix is completely back!
Yeah, Mina is totally winning that title.
Starlight Kid vs AZM (C) – High-Speed title match
INJECT IT INTO MY VEINS.
Video package includes a bit of AZM responding to Mercedes Mone and her challenge for the IWGP Women’s championship. But it’s time for these two to do this once again, maybe for the last time. There’s bigger things in the future for both, methinks, and this title is likely going to be left behind when they get there.
SLK’s Liger variant mask is bitching. Usual high-speed tradeoffs start us off to lead to a stalemate. Obviously not even going to try doing play by play for these two. AZM targets the arm to start, kicking at it, while Starlight seems to want the knee of AZM for her collection.
We end up on the floor and AZM reverses a DDT into a suplex, then goes back into the ring so she can come off the top to the floor with a crossbody onto pretty much the entire Oedo Tai faction. Both women end up on top and AZM goes for a double stomp, but misses it and Kid moonsaults her off the middle rope for her insolence.
Back in and SLK gets the Stretch Muffler as I recall the glory day of her team with Desperado at the NJPW/Stardom crossover show. Spanish Fly attempt off the top rope by Kid is blocked by AZM, who then hits the double foot stomp. AZM goes up again, double foot stomp on the arm of Kid! AZM goes up again, now a double foot stomp proper for two.
Kid counters an armbar into a rollup for two. They trade 1-counts before AZM hits a dropkick to wipe Starlight out. Another one misses and Starlight gets a dragon-screw on the mat before locking in the Muffler again, and AZM is in trouble. She gets out of it, but Kid gets a Tiger suplex for two. Tombstone Driver gets two as Kid is pouring it on.
Kid tries for the top rope Spanish Fly again, but once again AZM has learned and jumps out of it before getting back to back rollups for two. Small thing, but AZM should have sold the knee when she hit the mat off the top. They trade reversals all over the mat and AZM wipes out Starlight with a couple of kicks to the head.
AZM with a Canadian Destroyer into the armtrap rollup for two. I swear, if I could go back in time and kill one person, Hitler may end up being safe but Petey Williams better watch his fucking back. They end up on top and AZM brings her to the mat via armbar, and while Kid puts up a fight, she can’t escape and submits to keep the title where it is. (AZM over Starlight Kid, submission, 17:05)
THOUGHTS: ****1/2. Not as good as their best but certainly nothing to complain about, these two are absolute magic with each other. If this was the swan song, they’ve made each other’s careers better just by working against each other. There are very few matches where I mean it when I say that I could watch them wrestle all day, but these two are in that category. They are perfect opponents, and this match, with zero Oedo Tai interference, was simply excellent.
Post-match, we get the pinky swear of respect, and Starlight bows to AZM before leaving.
Maya Yukihi vs Giulia (C) – World of Stardom title match
Okay, so – Maya was a rival of Giulia’s in Ice Ribbon (man, Giulia left behind a trail of women who want her dead from her time in Ice Ribbon, I have to say), and Maya beat Giulia every time she faced her. So after Maya announced her participation in the Triangle Derby, Giulia basically called out Yukihi for coming to Stardom after she said that you don’t need to go to Stardom to be a star, and that Maya was a bitch in Ice Ribbon who talked shit behind her back and always hated her anyway.
Giulia brings a table to the ring and I expect we’re going to see a fight here. And that’s pretty much confirmed as Rossy tries to get the belt to hold up for the traditional pre-match photo op…..and Giulia grabs the strap and whacks Maya in the face with it before the opening bell! Oh, tremendous.
So, this is a weird one. Basically, these two women HATE each other and this is barely a wrestling match at all to a certain extent. It’s really fascinating as a result. Giulia tosses Maya into the ringside chairs twice, with Maya taking some fabulous bumps. Maya returns the favor on the other side before they end up in the ring, where Maya kicks the SHIT out of her and gets two.
Slugfest now and they are raining down some stiff shots in there. Goodness. Giulia hits a T-Bone suplex, but Maya returns the favor and they end up on the floor again, this time heading up the ramp. Giulia hits a Falcon Arrow on top of the ramp as the count begins. Giulia sets up a table as they continue to fight all around ringside before getting back in at 18 and then continuing to fight, as Maya slaps her on the mat.
And they promptly roll out to the floor again from there. More fighting before they come back in and now Giulia just fires headbutts until Maya falls. The look of absolute disgust on Giulia’s face is just glorious. She really does get how to be a pro wrestler in a lot of the ways that matter. Maya makes a comeback with some absolutely insane rapid fire slaps to the face, then a running knee in the corner.
Maya goes up, but Giulia cuts her off with a double underhook superplex! Giulia goes up, now Maya cuts HER off and they slap it out up top before a double headbutt sends both crashing all the way to the floor. Giulia slaps her on the floor now and they head to the table that Giulia had earlier, Giulia shoving the ref down as they go.
And Giulia piledrives her through said table.
Giulia is pleased with herself and smiles, so Maya grabs a piece of the broken table and whacks her with it against the apron. Over to another table now and Maya shoves the ref down this time. Double underhook into a powerbomb from Maya results in the most terrifying sound I’ve heard in ages as Giulia crashes onto the table, coming up bleeding from multiple cuts on her back. Maya charges Giulia, right into a Northern Lights Bomb on the floor! Giulia attempts to get back in the ring, but can’t break free of Maya who has hold of her leg, and we end up going to a double count-out as a result. (Double countout, 17:57)
THOUGHTS: ***3/4. I’m not really sure what to do with this, frankly. I can see someone giving it *, I can see someone going **** and higher, honestly. I couldn’t get to 4 myself, but there was some SUPER intensity between these two in there and it stood out to everything else on the show as a fight, where there seemed to be something truly personal going on. That almost always makes for a watchable match and this certainly was that, but on the other hand if you like your wrestling to be in the ring and not too full of garbage on the floor along with a decisive finish, this one fails on all of those metrics. To me, and the reason I got to where I did on my rating, the match worked because of how different it was and how it conveyed the emotional turmoil of the wrestlers, and for that alone I almost got to 4, but there were some hiccups in there and I didn’t love the finish, although I reserve the right to change my mind if they do a strong followup to this at some point.
After the bell rings they continue to choke each other and have to be pulled apart. Giulia gets a mic. “Hey fucker, what are you doing?” Oh, my. She once again asks Maya what she’s going to do. The fans chant for more time, and Giulia calls them stupid before telling Maya to watch her back on the way home. Maya points out that she didn’t even ask for the match in the first place. Maybe they’ll meet again, but until then arrivederci!
Giulia goes to leave, but out comes Tam Nakano. She thinks Giulia looks so sad – wasn’t Giulia the one who said that she needs Tam Nakano? Nakano needs her too. Stardom’s biggest show ever, Yokohama Arena, Giulia’s opponent can only be Tam Nakano! That red belt, she wants to fight Giulia for it!
Talbot has already booked his ticket! I can feel it!
Giulia has the mic. Tam Nakano, again? Is she done babysitting Tsukiyama? No, Tam says, she isn’t done, but she wants that red belt! She’ll put up anything, her hair, her property, she doesn’t care if the stip is that she becomes Giulia’s slave! We all would, Tam. Don’t even need a match stip to volunteer for THAT duty. Giulia laughs and says that if we fight, isn’t it enough to just fight for the belt? But Tam, Giulia is going to put you through hell again, so be ready. Arrivederci! Tam promises to crush her into space dust again!
God’s Eye (Syuri, MIRAI, Ami Sourei) vs Prominence (Suzu Suzuki, Risa Sera, Hiragi Kurumi) – Triangle Derby Final match
Titles are on the line here as well, so we’ve got some real stakes to work with. Ami and Risa kick things off. Ami gets the upper hand there, so Sera gets a chair and wackiness ensues with everyone coming in and the fight ends up on the floor, and that’s Prominence territory.
Back in the ring and Ami tags out, here comes Syuri. She has a hell of a slugfest with Sera, including Risa punching her in the foot, ostensibliy to take away some of her kicking power. That doesn’t seem to work as Syuri suplexes her and kicks her in the face. Ami back in against Kurumi now, with Ami gaining the upper hand.
Tags on both sides bring in Suzuki and MIRAI, and they do a terrific sequence, tons of fire and snap on their moves. MIRAI just punishes Suzu in the corner and goes up for a missile dropkick for two. Suzu regains the advantage when Prominence comes in, but loses it back and MIRAI slams her facefirst onto the mat. GIANT lariat from MIRAI gets two. This match is wonderful, just super fast with stiff shots.
MIRAI targets the injured shoulder of Suzuki with an armbar, but Sera saves it. Suzuki blocks a Death Valley Driver with a headbutt and just punches MIRAI in the face, allowing a Prominence triple team that turns MIRAI into jello, but Ami saves the match and we keep going.
Back to Suzu and MIRAI alone in the ring, and Suzuki gets a German suplex, but MIRAI pops up with a lariat! Reverse ‘rana by Suzuki and she says it’s over, Tequila Shot by Suzu! 1, 2, NO! But that doesn’t deter Suzuki, who hits the locomotion Germans with a bridge and MIRAI can’t kick out, as Prominence takes it all! (Prominence over God’s Eye, pinfall, 14:47)
THOUGHTS: ****. I really, really liked this match. It was concise and didn’t overstay the welcome, it played off the fact that we’d seen these women in matches before tonight, and the right team went over in the end. I have nothing bad to say about this match at all and it was a worthy main event.
Suzu has the mic. “Prominence wins! And we successfully defended the belts!” Don’t you see, Stardom, this is Prominence. A year ago, we came to Stardom and people had lots of opinions on us, well, this is Prominence! The apex of units! Prominence wins the tournament, defends the belts….why is there no flagpole for the flag? It looks like they’re just holding a blanket! But this is the winner’s blanket! Everyone who attended must have been satisfied by the victory of Prominence! She leads the crowd in a Prominence chant, then shows the crowd the Prominence hand sign before getting the crowd to chant Prominence after they say Let’s Go, which the crowd does. And the confetti goes off and we’re done!
FINAL THOUGHTS: Holy bejeezus shit, this was a GREAT show, with multiple **** matches by my count and a few that barely missed, with a crazy run at the end of totally different matches that were all good. It’s rare I see a run like that, most of the time something disappoints, but there wasn’t one in sight on this card. That’s the main reason I wanted to do this review, because they really knocked this one out of the proverbial park.
I will see all of you again for the Yokohama show, if not earlier.
As always, thanks for reading this thing I wrote,
Rick Poehling
@MrSoze on Twitter
[email protected] for email