ECW On Sci Fi
Date: May 6, 2008
Location: Labatt Center, London, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Mike Adamle, Tazz
It’s a special night as this is the 100th episode of ECW. That is quite the accomplishment, especially given how messy the early days were around here. The big story continues to be Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero, because that feud just can’t end already. Other than that, hopefully we get another big time story around here. Let’s get to it.
Smackdown
Date: May 2, 2008
Location: Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole
We’re done with Backlash and Undertaker beat Edge again to retain the World Title. That leaves us on the road to Judgment day and odds are the trilogy match between the two is on the horizon. Other than that we are going to need something else around here and we might start that this week. Let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: April 15, 2008
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Attendance: 17,422
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz, Mike Adamle
We’re over in England this week as the European tour is on. In this case, we have a special main event as the Brothers of Destruction are here. That alone should be enough to carry the show, as there is little to care about other than one or two stars. Maybe they have something else to help it out, because the show needs it. Let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: April 8, 2008
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
We are still starting the new reality around here, with Kane as the ECW Champion and CM Punk as the star who is way too big for this show. Other than that, we have the continuing adventures of Colin Delaney, who is still trying to get a contract. That hasn’t been going well for him and odds are it doesn’t get better this week. Let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: April 1, 2008
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
We’re done with Wrestlemania and thankfully that means we have a new ECW Champion. Kane won the pre-show battle royal and then beat Chavo Guerrero in about ten seconds to win the title. That alone makes the show feel more important, but now we get to see where they go from here. Let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 18, 2008
Location: Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
Now we continue the lame duck string of shows as there is very little actually going on around here that matters for Wrestlemania. The main ECW involvement is going to be a battle royal for a title shot later on and that isn’t something that is easily built up outside of the Royal Rumble. Maybe they have something else for the next two weeks though so let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 11, 2008
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,121
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
Wrestlemania continues to inch closer and thankfully it seems that Chavo Guerrero can finally move on from CM Punk and find a new challenger for the ECW Title. This week is about the Tag Team Titles though as Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney are challenging Miz and John Morrison for the Smackdown Tag Team Titles in an Extreme Rules match. Let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: January 1, 2008
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
We’ll start a new year right here and that means things are not going so well for ECW World Champion CM Punk. In addition to dealing with the monsters in Mark Henry and Big Daddy V, he has to deal with the heel that will never go away in Chavo Guerrero. That’s where we are after a week off to close out the previous year so let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: October 16, 2007
Location: NEC, Birmingham, England
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
We’re still in England and things are not going so well for ECW World Champion CM Punk. Last week saw the return of John Morrison, who beat up a banged up Punk in the main event. At the same time, Punk has to deal with Big Daddy V, who seems like he wants the title too. Or maybe to use Punk as a pizza topping. Let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: September 11, 2007
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 5,200
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
We are officially in a new era around here as CM Punk has defeated John Morrison to become the new ECW World Champion. Odds are Morrison gets a rematch whenever he gets back from his suspension, but we’ll need someone else on the way there. I’m curious to see how that goes, but they could use some other important stories around here. Let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: September 18, 2007
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
We’re done with Unforgiven, where CM Punk retained the ECW World Title over Elijah Burke. That means we are going to need a fresh challenger but I have no idea who that is going to be. There just aren’t that many stars to come after the title and hopefully they can fix that up somehow soon. Let’s get to it.
ECW On Sci Fi
Date: August 21, 2007
Location: Colonial Center, Columbia, South Carolina
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
It’s the go home show for Summerslam and the one ECW match is set. Granted you might not have known that based on last week’s show, as you might think that we’re coming up on Boogeyman vs. Big Daddy V as the show’s big match. The build has been a bit weird in recent weeks, but that is mainly due to the match being set up so far in advance. Let’s get to it.
ECW on Sci Fi
Date: August 14, 2007
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz
Things have changed again as we now have a bit company wide angle. Vince McMahon has an illegitimate child who is a wrestler on one of the brands, meaning the ECW roster is in contention. That could open up some doors for some interesting options, but we also have an upcoming ECW World Title match between John Morrison and CM Punk. Let’s get to it.
Kofi Kingston & Evan Bourne vs. Shelton Benjamin & Mike Knox
Sydal is re-named and officially part of the ECW roster after last week’s thrashing from Shelton Benjamin. Unsure why they thought Hitler’s wife was a good influence but at least Dolph Ziggler doesn’t feel lonely anymore.
But first, WWE One Night Stand 2008!
The Big Show vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. John Morrison vs. CM Punk vs. Tommy Dreamer (Singapore Cane Match)
After winning last week, Colin Delaney is officially part of the ECW on Sci-Fi roster. Armando gives him his new contract and books Delaney vs. Knox for tonight. Sadly Delaney didn’t sign it like Arnie in The Running Man.
The biggest episode in ECW on Sci-Fi history starts with…Mike Adamle talking on the mic. Even in the ring he talks with Shatner pauses. He covers his resume (Olympics, American Gladiators etc.) but even with all that he didn’t realise how hard this job would be. He admits he’s made mistakes but asks the crowd to enjoy the episode and thanks them for listening. Like Adamle’s hiring, I don’t know what this accomplished.
We’re in London, England and we have a big-ass main event with ECW Champ Kane teaming with WWE Champ Undertaker! Oh and it’s also Joey Styles’ last show as he’s moving onto working for WWE dot com (which he did a marvellous job of supercharging) which I’m thankful for as he’d been white noise for months. Let’s hope his replacement will be better. Oh, he’s here at the desk let’s-
oh no
OH NO.
—
”What happens when you take that man’s sun-glasses off? OK! I understand! We won’t go there!” starts Adamle and it’s impossible to convey how awkward and forced he sounds from his opening line and the realisation there’s another hour of TV to go.
CM Punk, Jimmy Wang Yang, Shannon Moore, Kofi Kingston vs. Elijah Burke, Deuce, Domino, Shelton Benjamin
Adamlemania continues to run wild as he talks over the ring introductions and repeats everyone’s name to remind himself who everyone is.”They will have a say in tonight’s…*looks at notes* eight-man tag team match.” He notes Kofi Kingston will be CM Punk’s tag partner. ”How do you like me now?” Adamle says Shelton will be teaming with Burke. I mean he’s technically right but he’s talking like it’s the first eight-man tag match he’s ever seen. Domino starts by getting double-teamed by Shan & Wang but it’s hard to ignore Adamle’s dead air and confusion. Punk and Shelton jostle until Shelton hurls him outside the ring and we go to break. We get Burke vs. Punk one last time before Burke leaves forever in a few weeks. Yang gets worked over by Benjamin as Tazz struggles to fill the silence as Adamle can’t think of anything to say. Deuce tags in and gets under the skin of the opposite team while he beats down Yang. I think reminding everyone he was still employed would have been enough aggravation. Eventually he makes the hot tag to Kofi who takes out Deuce with a ”leg kick” and lands the Boom Drop and we get Adamle’s legendary:
Kofi takes out Deuce with the Trouble In Paradise and it’s ”Uno, Dos, Adios.”
Winners: The goodies (I’m surprised they had a eight-man tag match, last time they were in the UK they didn’t have that many wrestlers on the entire episode. It didn’t matter though, it was a simple multi-man that would have been forgotten instantly if it wasn’t for Adamle’s best Eric The Actor impression.)
Dramatic Recap of last week’s contract signing and there’s not enough video filters on Adobe to make Bam Neely look impressive. Kane reminds us Undertaker is here and Bam is fucked. He’s not on the show tonight so Kane’s right.
Adamle tells us ”The Tazz” is in the ring for Diva Dance Off, somehow managing to overshadow titties and jiggling.
Tommy Dreamer vs. Mike Knox
There’s a MIKE KNOX WAS FRAMED sign in the crowd, oh wow remember that whole thing?
Police out of Henry County, Georgia are moving on in the Mike Knox steroid link investigation. They are more interested in finding the supplier of the drugs. Knox formerly lived in a residence in Henry County with three other wrestlers, but steroids were left behind in an attic after they moved out. Knox said the steroids weren’t his, and WWE believes him as they have defended him publicly (and continued to push him on TV).
Jon Bravo has been on the hunt for a while. Anyway, Armando wants Mike Knox to wrestle a competitive match with a future world champion…Colin Delaney!
Colin Delaney vs. Mike Knox
Knox does a better job of disposing of Colin than he did those steroids. Delaney takes some Taz-esque suplexes before Knox pins him.
Winner: Mike Knox (Armando was a glorious shit-eating dick during this Colin feud.)
Adamle starts talking about ”Mike The Miz” taking on Undertaker & Kane in a ”mitch-match” tonight while staring at his notes on camera.
Miz & Morrison talk backstage about being stronger than Kane & Undertaker as they’re always fighting each other. Morrison isn’t scared as Miz is going to be starting the match. Miz looks like he
The Miz & John Morrison vs. Kane & The Undertaker
WWE Tag Team Champions vs. ECW World & WWE Champion. ”You may think he looks like Tarzan but hits like Jane, but you’d be wrong.” OK I’ll give Adamle credit, that’s a good line. Didn’t really fit what he was going for as he was trying put over Morrison but he’s batting low so I’ll allow it. Miz starts with Kane and that goes as well for Miz as you’d expect. Undi takes in and he’s still peak-athleticism so he gets Old School early and big boots a charging Morrison like it’s nothing. Undi tries for the apron leg drop but Morrison stops him like he’s trying to leave for WCW in 2000.
Back from break, Miz & Morrison are working over Undertaker. Tazz calls them the World Tag Champs instead of the WWE ones, Adamle is contagious. Undi resumes offence on Morrison until he tags in Kane. Morrison tags in Miz but he doesn’t want any of him so Kane has to throw him in. That was cute. Kane tries the top rope clothesline but Morrison pulls him off (not like that) so Kane boots him off the apron and Morrison takes a face-first bump onto the floor like a madman. This allows Miz to get the advantage on Kane with his Scrappy Doo offence. Kane gets isolated and worked over but Kane doesn’t tend to sell body-work so he big boots Miz down and tags in Undi. It’s weird seeing Undertaker running so fluidly at this stage of his career. Benjamin Button can’t get a double chokeslam on Miz & Morrison but Kane helps him make it a single chokeslam on both. Undertaker finishes with the Tombstone Piledriver.
Winners: Kane & The Undertaker (Harmless house show match to get Undertaker on the show, who the crowd obviously loved.)
Overall: This would have been a forgotten show if it hadn’t been for Adamle’s debut. Despite the star power in the main event and eight-man tag match, there wasn’t anything that stood out above Adamle’s Holy Shit Didn’t Anyone See If This Dude Could Commentate Wrestling Before Hiring Him performance which was at least 0.8 Art O’Donnell. It would later emerge that Adamle was struggling with CTE, making this all the more alarming.
I’ve been Maffew, I wrote about wXw 16 Carat 2018 last weekend so go read that. And Botchamania 363 will be later today.
We’re in Corpus Christi, Texas and Kofi Kingston has been added to the intro but I don’t see him lasting long. CM Punk starts the show to a roaring reaction to a SOLD OUT CROWD here to watch Smackdown afterwards. Punk recaps last week’s Mariachi Celebration, insisting that although he’s Straight-Edge he does like a good party and we get Dramatic Replays of El Kabong.
