Tooned In: Early Fruity and Cocoa Pebbles Commercials (Early ’70s)

Patreon update: my first Superfriends exclusive is up, in which they face off with the Gentleman Ghost. Also featuring a lot of emergencies at sea, and Superman and Green Lantern harassing an elephant. Check it out, and more, by joining here. As always, there’s free and paying memberships.

I’ll still provide content here, though, mainly shows or versions of shows I didn’t review yet. Today, I’m thinking outside the MeTV box and heading to YouTube for the genesis of an iconic series of cereal ads sponsored by an equally iconic cartoon series.

I am speaking of course of Post’s Pebbles cereals. I can safely assume most of us grew up watching Barney and his myriad of disguises meant to trick Fred out of his Fruity or Cocoa Pebbles cereals. They work at first, but inevitably Barney’s cover gets blown, leading Fred to shout “BARNEY! MY PEBBLES!” and angrily give chase as an announcer tries to convince us how the sugary flakes are part of a nutritious breakfast.

I’ll forego the usual memes about “Why doesn’t Barney just buy some cereal?,” “LOL this is still better than when Fred and Wilma did ads for cigarettes,” and about how awesome the Christmas Pebbles commercial was. Instead, we’re going back to the beginning, where the Flintstones and the Rubbles had other ways to pitch their products.

Watch along:

https://youtu.be/r_2qgn7VlQQ?si=zH9zLvMci9k8mkqQ

Of note: at this point, Alan Reed is still voicing Fred Flintstone. Henry Corden, his successor, is probably the Voice of Fruity Pebbles for most of us growing up.

First ad starts with Fred and Wilma at the breakfast table, saying how Fruity Pebbles is like a bowl of noisy fruit…trying to glom onto Rice Krispies’ gimmick? Fred tries to get the catchphrase “Cocoa Moco Good!” over before running off…somewhere to proclaim his love for Cocoa Pebbles. But we have no idea where he would have gone in his cereal-happy stupor, because Betty and Barney come over to show off his new magic trick, where he makes the Pebbles disappear in his magic hat. No trickery, no easy excuse for him to eat the cereal, it really vanishes. End of commercial chase ensues with the less catchy line of “Bring back my Pebbles!” I guess Fred had to change it cause the neighbors were ready to call in a kidnapping case.

Next, Fred has a secret: Fruity Pebbles now has brighter colors. Don’t let Barney know, though…no, not because he’s on his way in some ridiculous costume ready to steal it. Nope…instead, seeing the colorful cereal turns Barney into a Fruity Monster, a hulking version of his usual self. Fred immediately gives his friend the Pebbles to stop the effects. Fred’s next to transform, but Barney likewise cures his mutation.

The Flintstones and Rubbles are next seen in a treehouse, and this HAS to be when Bedrockians started to evolve and create the high homes that would form the Jetsons’ Orbit City, supposedly billions of years after Bedrock supposedly existed but really one and the same, with Bedrock as we established being the dystopia that remains on the ground. They’re singing the praises of Fruity Pebbles, complete with guitar, when a dinosaur shakes things up demanding something fruit flavored like she was Andre the Giant approaching the Honeycomb Hideout. Fred now sings his ode to Pebbles in terror as he rushes the cereal to the beast, and all is well.

Fruitsaurus returns in another ad, talking like she’s putting her face near a desk fan. Barney zoinks into Betty’s arms in fear, but Fred has a giant bowl ready. Betty and Wilma do a cheerleader type song and dance praising the flavors, while Barney notes it comes in “Red, orange,and yellow,” and those colors work for Fruitsaurus, brother. A happy Fruitsaurus steals Fred’s catchphrase, and Barney notes “You’ll like Cocoa Pebbles too.” Not very likely if you’re into the colors of Hulkamania.

AGAIN, Fred and Barney are suddenly folk singers, armed with guitars they repeat the catchphrases seen earlier in the first ad here, then sing a song about putting sweet Pebbles in their mouths. Um, ew? And Fred, after telling Pebbles to avoid strangers with stalactite ice creams in their caves in Strong Kids Safe Kids, has apparently lived long enough to see himself become the villain. Oh, and you can get horrifying Flintstone figurines when you buy Fruity and Cocoa Pebbles. No Fred, they are NOT cute! They actually remind me of Eddie Ellner’s column in Pro Wrestling Illustrated, and his idea that the Andre Honeycomb ad was meant to scare kids into not eating sugar-laden breakfast food. I’d imagine this was meant to have the same effect.

A different giant dinosaur is blocking Fred and Barney on the road, and his owner can’t move him. Fruity Pebbles does the trick again, though, as does the Cocoa variety. The dinosaur gives chase and Barney is happy that the cereal gives him “yabba dabba doo!” So that’s how cavemen said “high blood sugar.” Fred was begging everyone for help all those years and we didn’t even know it!

Something amazing is next, I shit you not. No pun intended.

But first, a break amongst our commercial breaks: brought to you by Josie and the Pussycats, who remind you that a taco trick will get you the man you want.

Now, after those messages, we’ll be right back with these messages …

Okay, now for something I cannot make up. We’re at the Fruity Pebbles factory, and how shall I put this? THE CEREAL IS POOPED OUT BY A DINOSAUR. No, really, go to the video and check it out. And Barney brags that when Fred makes them, he eats them. Kids off camera laugh, clearly at the idea of Barn eating dinosaur feces. Still, Fred is mortally wounded as always by his friend stealing cereal.

Another factory ad follows, but no pooping dinosaurs this time. Yet it’s for Cocoa Pebbles, which would have fit the other commercial. Wilma comes in, and of course, being sabertooth-whipped at heart, Fred allows her, while declaring the cereal “Yabba Dabba Chocolatey Doo!” Come on, that even sounds like he’s describing poop!

I almost think the next ad is back into the toilet, literally, seeing as Barney has a Cocoa Pebbles box by the hind end of another dinosaur, but no, Fred just sends the cereal down its scales….and into Barney’s mouth. Barn also steals the new catchphrase from last commercial.

Footballasaurus is the next helper in the Cocoa Pebbles factory, and reminds me of Chargin’ Chuck from Super Mario World. Barney prevents himself from being killed over cereal theft with Pebbles’ newest feature: being “chocolatey enough to make you smile”…so we’ve come full circle at this point from the cereal turning the Flintstones into The Hulk.

The last ad has another sports themed dinosaur helping out, this one being a pitcher and bat-a-saurus, who send the Pebbles into Barney’s thieving hands. By the time this series has ended, I am wondering less about Barney buying cereal, and more why Fred doesn’t fire him from the factory if he keeps eating their profits.

So long, and remember, it should be the season to be sharing all year long!