The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 03.08.23
Housekeeping notes first!
First up, an exciting announcement, as RD and the Wrestlecrap team asked me to start writing for the site, and of course I happily accepted. So I’ll start doing a couple of inductions per month and I feel like I’ll probably be a good fit there.
Second up, Dynamite is taping in Winnipeg next week, and I’m of course flying out to be there for it. So I’ll be headed in on Tuesday night (after a ridiculous 7 hours of travel time from Saskatoon) and headed home on Thursday afternoon, so I likely won’t have the rant up until Thursday night. But suffice it to say, I’m pretty pumped about this trip. We don’t have Ikea here in Saskatoon so I have to get my Swedish meatballs when I have the chance.
Live from Sacramento, CA
Your hosts are Excalibur, Tony Schiavone & Taz
All-Atlantic title: Orange Cassidy v. Jay Lethal
Sonjay’s crew get sent to the back by a horde of referees while the announcers accidentally get their banter piped into the house mic. Whoops. Lethal gets a backslide for two, but Orange takes him down with a headlock and Jay bails to the floor for an extended chat with the front row. Back in, they trade reversals and Orange counters a figure-four for two and rolls him up for two. Lethal Injection is blocked with a kick to the arm, and Orange goes to work on that. Jay hits the floor and Orange tries a dive, but Jay catches him, so Orange reverses him into the post and Lethal sends Orange into the stairs. Back in the ring, Lethal sweeps the leg on the apron to further take out the knee, and crotches Orange on the top rope before taking out the knee again and putting him on the floor. Lethal with a kneecrusher into the ringpost as we take a break. Back with a slugfest in the ring and Orange tries the stunner, but Lethal counters out, so Orange hits him with a brainbuster. They fight to the top and Orange comes down with the DDT, but hurts his knee on the way down and only gets two. Orange Punch, but the knee gives out and Jay gets the figure-four, forcing Orange to make the ropes. They fight to the apron and Orange makes a comeback, but Jay takes out the knee again and goes back to the figure-four. Orange cradles for two, but walks into the Lethal Combination and Jay goes up with a flying elbow, but lands on Orange’s elbow. Orange tries another punch, but Jay counters with a cutter for two. Lethal Injection, but Jay’s arm gives out and Orange finishes with the Orange Punch at 14:41 to retain. This was some very professional wrestling action. ***1/2. Afterwards, Jeff Jarrett hits the ring and smashes his guitar into Orange’s knee to set up that next program. And you know what, it’ll probably be awesome. I’m there for it.
Meanwhile, someone has apparently stolen the TNT title from Wardlow’s car. Who does he think he is, Chris Jericho? Oh wait, now I’m gonna get fired from Jericho’s website all over again.
Ricky Starks joins us, wondering what his next move is, but we get a distraction from a Bullet Club video, and Juice Robinson attacks to set up the next thing. Thank god that wasn’t Jay White, which is what I was fearing when they did the Bullet Club tease. We really dodged a BULLET there, AEW fans!
Meanwhile, Wardlow wants a falls count anywhere match with Hobbs tonight, since he’s dressed casual anyway.
Ruby Soho joins Renee to explain her actions at Revolution, as she complains about the fans turning on her in the match against Kris Statlander, and then calls the fans a bunch of “neckbearded fat trolls” who begged Saraya to come out of retirement and then turned on her as well. She seems a little bitter.
Ruby Soho v. Skye Blue
Ruby attacks before the bell and runs Skye into the post, and then into the ring for an enzuigiri and STO for two. Back with Ruby hitting a Saito suplex, but Skye evades a charge and makes the comeback. She gets her kicks and goes up with a crossbody for two, but Ruby blocks the Code Blue and finishes with Destination Unknown at 6:42. Just an OK match. **1/4. Willow comes out to prevent a beatdown, but Ruby turns on her as well and people are spraypainted.
Meanwhile, Hangman Page is sporting a shiner and he kind of regrets going EVIL COWBOY at the PPV but he got pushed there by Moxley. But as far as he’s concerned, it’s done with.
Meanwhile, MJF promises to show up in “wretched Winnipeg” to celebrate Bryan Danielson’s birthday.
FTR joins Tony in the ring to celebrate returning to TV, and as expected they’re coming after the Gunns and want the tag team titles.
Meanwhile, Jade Cargill wants more competition and challenges whoever the best in Canada is for next week’s show in Winnipeg.
AR Fox & Top Flight v. Chris Jericho, Daniel Garcia & Sammy Guevara
Fox quickly chases Jericho to the floor and follows with a dive. Back in, the JAS takes him out with a cheapshot in the corner and they all stop to pose. Over to Darius, who puts Garcia on the floor to set up for a Dante moonsault, but more systematic cheating from the JAS turns the tide as we take a break. Back with Sammy holding a chinlock while Garcia dances on the apron, but Fox gets a hot tag and the babyfaces run wild on Garcia, as Darius hits a german suplex for two and then a Spanish Fly on Jericho for two. Back elbow gets two, and they all fight on the outside, with Fox hitting the senton on Sammy in a crazy move. Back in the ring, Jericho tries the Walls on Darius, but gets rolled up for two. But then Jake uses the bat on Darius and the Judas Effect finishes at 9:40. This was fun but not great or anything. ***1/4.
Afterwards, the JAS celebrates their one year anniversary and declares themselves to be the #1 contenders to the Trios title, but the Elite shows up and we get a heated discussion about who’s the best wrestler from Winnipeg, and then the House of Black pops in and challenges them both to a title match next week. Well that’s quite the main event.
Meanwhile, Tony Khan announces that the All-Atlantic title is now the International title, which apparently has something to do with Shazam. Hey, if it means more cash from WBD, good for them. Also that’s a way better name than “All Atlantic”.
Meanwhile, it’s time for Bryan Danielson to go home after losing to MJF.
Jon Moxley & Claudio Castagnoli v. John Silver & Alex Reynolds
Big brawl to start and the BCC beats on Silver in their corner, and Claudio tries a suplex, but Silver powers out of it and hits his own. Moxley takes him down with a rollup for two and puts the boots to Johnny to keep him in the corner. Claudio with a legdrop for two and he goes to a chinlock. Silver fights out and Reynolds gets a hot tag and runs wild on Claudio, but he goes to the top and Claudio slugs him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Claudio holding a facelock on Reynolds, but Alex escapes with a double stomp and Silver gets the hot tag. He beats on Moxley in the corner, but runs into a back elbow before coming back with a german suplex for two. Claudio breaks up the comeback and puts the boots to Silver on the ropes. Dark Order makes a comeback and tries their double-teams, but Moxley counters a suplex from Reynolds into a pretty swank D’Arce choke to finish at 11:21. This was OK, like a Dark main event, but nothing great. **1/2. Afterwards the BCC continues their mean streak and puts the beats on the Dark Order until Hangman Page makes the save, so apparently they’re not as done as promised.
Meanwhile, the Acclaimed are ready to begin their quest for the tag titles again, but 2.0 interrupts and offers them a chance to be sports entertainers. That one doesn’t go over very well.
TNT title, Falls Count Anywhere: Wardlow v. Powerhouse Hobbs
Wardlow continues to feel ice old, even after winning the title, so they might as well put it on Hobbs here. We journey to the back right away, as Hobbs runs Wardlow into a car and beats on him with his golden donut before bouncing a keg off the window. Hobbs suplexes him onto the hood, but Wardlow backdrops him onto the windshield for two. Wardlow beats on him with some plastic trays as we take a break. Back with them headed down to the ring, where they trade spinebusters and both no-sell it. Wardlow with the F10 for two. Hobbs comes back with another spinebuster, and then rolls Wardlow into a second straight spinebuster for two. They head to the floor and Hobbs runs him into the railing and sets up a table, but Wardlow throws a drink in his face and puts him through the table with a swanton for two. Wardlow powerbombs him on the ramp and takes him to the announce table to finish him, but QT Marshall shows up and beats on Wardlow with a chair in a callback to the Ricky Starks deal, and they team up to powerbomb Wardlow onto the stage for the 10 count and TNT title at 11:20. I mean, that would have looked better if it wasn’t ridiculously obvious that he was essentially getting powerbombed onto a giant marshmallow. Still a really good HOSS FIGHT leading up to the soft, luxuriously fluffy finish. ***
This was mostly just a solid show setting up bigger things down the line, but nothing to really go out of your way to see.
NEXT WEEK: I use my last week of vacation time to go to WINNIPEG. IN MARCH. Tony Khan continues to owe me one, but I’m pretty sure that Trios title will make it worthwhile.