The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 01.25.23
Live from Lexington, KY
Your hosts are Excalibur, Tony Schiavone & Taz
Interesting news today, as TSN launched their “TSN Plus” streaming service, and amongst all the other stuff dumped on there is AEW Rampage every week, so we finally get THAT after however long it’s been. I’ll probably keep AEW Plus on Fite just for the PPV discount, though.
Chris Jericho & Sammy Guevara v. Ricky Starks & Action Andretti
Sammy and Action do a superhero fight to start, complete with dueling Black Widow poses, but then Sammy gets a cheapshot and beats on Andretti with chops in the corner. I love the lighting setup again tonight with the brightly lit crowd highlighted. Andretti chases him to the floor, but Sammy comes back in with a dropkick and then teases a dive before changing his mind due to the hurtful taunts of the crowd. So then Andretti gets his own dive onto innocent bystander Daniel Garcia, and Sammy gets the teased dive on the second try instead. Back in, Sammy with a top rope rana, but Andretti lands on his feet and hits the Spanish Fly for two. Over to Jericho and Starks next and they slug it out, then Starks catapults him into the corner and follows with the ropewalk. But he’s too cocky and Sammy gets an incredible ropewalk cutter of his own to bring him down. Jericho gets two off that.
Over to Sammy who gets two from his own version of the Arrogant Cover, and they follow with Les Sex Gods Pose. The posing in this match has been impeccable, you HAVE to give them that. Andretti gets a hot tag and cleans house, hitting tope suicidas on both guys and a moonsault on Sammy for two. They collide on a bodyblock and it’s back to Starks, and he quickly spears Jericho for two. Sammy makes the save and Jericho rolls up Ricky for two, but Starks reverses the Codebreaker into a powerbomb for two. Andretti comes in with a springboard senton and goes up for his moonsault, but that hits knees and it’s back to Sammy. They trade kicks, but Jericho gets a cheapshot on Andretti and Sammy goes for the GTH. Andretti reverses to a poison rana and follows with an Argentine neckbreaker for two while Starks takes out Jericho on the floor. Sammy distracts the ref, however, and Garcia hits Andretti with the bat and Sammy finishes with the GTH at 13:00. I don’t think I would have started beating Andretti already but it was a solid tag match. ***1/4
Meanwhile, we finally get a video package celebrating Jay Briscoe. Oh man, that main event is gonna be rough to get through, isn’t it?
TNT title: Darby Allin v. Buddy Matthews
Buddy has his own half-skull facepaint, and he hurls Darby into the railings right away and then chucks him into the corner in the ring. Darby tries a dive and Buddy catches him and suplexes him on the apron, which is the HARDEST PART OF THE RING, and then brings him outside for a powerbomb that Darby reverses into a rana. Buddy uses the ring skirt to trip him up, and then drops a knee on him on the other side of the ring for two. Darby fights back with a stunner to put Buddy on the floor and he follows with a Coffin drop to the floor, but then the lights go out and the House of Black show up. Ortiz takes them out with a bat and they all brawl to the back, and we take a break. Back with Darby making a comeback with a poison rana to put Buddy on the floor, and he tries a crossbody into the ring that Buddy reverses for two. Darby with a crucifix for two. They exchange kicks and Darby tries the Code Red, but Buddy backslides him for two and bucklebombs him for two. Darby rolls him up for two and the Code Red gets two. They fight to the top and Darby brings him down with a top rope Death drop for two. Darby puts him on the ropes, hits the Coffin Drop, and pins him at 12:45 to retain. They were beating the hell out of each other here, which made minor league contender Matthews look like a legit threat for a while. ***3/4 Afterwards, former TNT champion Samoa Joe pops up and wants a rematch.
Meanwhile, Adam Cole continues to babyface.
Matt Hardy & Ethan Page v. Jungle Hook
Apparently Hook is the PWI Rookie of the Year, which frankly was unfair to the other rookies anyway. Everyone quickly brawls and Hook ends up in trouble outside the ring, but Perry saves with a dive and then gets double-teamed by Page and Hardy as they show surprisingly good teamwork. We take a break and return with Jungle Boy escaping and making the hot tag to Hook. But then Hook gets caught on the floor and Matt works on Perry with the Side Effect, only for Page to demand the tag. And then he walks into the Snare Trap and taps out at 7:00. Not much to this one, as most of it took place during the break. **
Meanwhile, the Acclaimed and the Gunns sit down for some family therapy as promised. So the Gunns whine about Billy being on the road and call Billy a failure as a father, but the Acclaimed has no sympathy. And the only thing that will make them happy is the belts. Well good luck there.
Meanwhile, Hangman Page wants to knock out Moxley in Ohio next, but Wheeler Yuta challenges him to a match on Rampage first.
Bryan Danielson v. Brian Cage
Cage throws him around to start, but Danielson takes him down for a Lebell Lock, until Cage makes the ropes and bails. Danielson hits him with dives, but Cage suplexes him on the apron and we take a break. Back with Cage suplexing Bryan back into the ring, dropping him on his arm as planned, and he puts Danielson on the top and tries for a powerbomb up there. Bryan fights him off and beats on him with kicks before stomping his head in and switching to an anklelock, but Cage fights up and they trade bombs. Cage catches the bu saiku knee and buckle bombs him, but Bryan rolls him up for the pin at 12:32 to squeak one out. Afterwards Cage goes for the bounty, which brings out MJF to assist or spectate or whatever. So they destroy Danielson’s arm with a chair and MJF goes for the Pillmanizing, but Takeshita makes the save and chases Cage off. A good David v. Goliath match where Bryan knew exactly how to make Cage look like a monster. ***
Meanwhile, Doc Samson gives his opinion that Bryan Danielson shouldn’t wrestle with his arm injured, but Bryan has another opinion and he’s GONNA WRESTLE.
Toni Storm v. Ruby Soho
Toni is full on heel now and they slug it out while Tony Schiavone spells out the “Homegrown v. Outsiders” subtext for anyone who hasn’t picked up on it yet. Ruby beats her into the corner, but Toni uses the power of her ass to send Ruby to the floor and we get quite the shot from the floor while she celebrates it. Toni runs her into the post and the railing and we take a break. Back with Ruby hitting a Saito suplex to make the comeback, but Storm rolls her up for two. Ruby with the riot kick for two. Ruby with a knee strike and Toni claims a broken nose and begs off, but of course she’s faking and suckers Ruby in and necks her on the ropes. Hip attack in the corner and tornado DDT gets two. Toni goes to finish, but Dr. Britt Baker DMD shows up to provide distraction and Ruby finishes at 8:55. There’s some irony to ex-WWE women fighting over being “homegrown” and then giving us a distraction finish, I suppose. Match was OK, and Toni is much more interesting as a heel. **1/4
Meanwhile, MJF tells Takeshita to mind his own beeswax, and then threatens to knock out Bryan Danielson just like he did “the big British guy who looks like Ellen DeGeneres on meth”. And next week, Danielson gets to go through Timothy Thatcher, which probably won’t be good news for the arm.
Jay Lethal v. Mark Briscoe
They trade takedowns to start and fight to a stalemate and then trade chops in the corner. Mark with the redneck kung fu, but Jay dropkicks him, and Mark gets a neckbreaker for two as we take a break. Back with Mark coming off the top with the flying chop and Iconoclasm for two. Jay with the Lethal Combination for two, but Mark rolls him up for two. Lethal with a front suplex to set up the Lethal Injection, but Mark rolls to the floor to escape. They tease a table spot, but Mark escapes and comes back with a blockbuster off the apron and then puts Jay through the table with the froggy elbow. Back in the ring, that gets two. Mark tries a Jay Driller, but Lethal reverses out, so Mark hits him with a lariat and tries it again. Lethal escapes again, so Mark hits another lariat, and finishes with the Jay Driller at 12:24. And the locker room comes out to honor Jay on the stage while Mark has his moment to end the show.
Mostly an entertaining filler show, although the main event was a special moment, and hopefully now Mark can be featured on the show moving forward and find a new path of his own. RIP Jay.