The SmarK Rant for AEW Dynamite – 06.08.22
I went Windows 11 tonight. This is gonna take some getting used to.
Live from Kansas City, MO
AEW World title eliminator Casino Battle Royale:
We’ve got Darby Allin, Eddie Kingston, Tony Nese, Daniel Garcia and Lance Archer to start out. Garcia and Eddie slug it out to start while Darby wisely stays away, but Nese prods Archer too much and gets chokeslammed. Darby attacks Archer with the skateboard and throws him to the floor for the dive, and then back in for a fight with Eddie. Eddie chokes him out and the next group are in. We get Ricky Starks, Jake Hager, Rey Fenix, Swerve Strickland and Keith Lee. Lee quickly throws out Nese and seemingly gets tossed out by Archer, but he comes back and sends Lance out. This brings out the next set with Max Caster and the Ass Boyz, plus Takeshita and John Silver. We take a break after Caster’s rap and return with the next group of Powerhouse Hobbs, Kyle O’Reilly, Dante Martin, Wheeler Yuta and Bobby Fish. Swerve and Lee team up to throw out the Ass Boyz, but Swerve turns on Lee and tosses him out for some big heel heat. And the Joker is Andrade, as he goes right after Allin and tries to throw out Swerve without success. Takeshita gets a big run on Starks, but Team Taz teams up to throw him out. Dante charges Starks on the apron and gets thrown out. Fenix and Starks have a pose-off, but Fenix kicks him off the apron and out. Swerve throws out Fenix and he hangs on and comes back while Darby goes on a big run and beats on Andrade in the corner. Everyone left hits their big moves and Darby dumps Fish out, but charges at Swerve and gets swerved out. Andrade boots out Swerve and then does a cool series with Andrade, popping up with a superkick RIGHT IN THE MUSH as Vince would say. Hobbs hits Fenix with a spinebuster and tries to put him out, but Fenix hangs on and Yuta puts Hobbs out from behind. So that leaves the final four of Andrade, Yuta, Kyle O’Reilly and Fenix. The heels gain the advantage, but Andrade makes the mistake of pointing to his head to indicate intelligence, and Yuta fights back with a missile dropkick. He trades rebound suplexes with Kyle, but Andrade puts him down and trades kicks with Fenix. Fenix tries a leapfrog and Andrade just nails him in the huevos and throws him out. Andrade charges and gets backdropped out by Yuta, and Yuta slugs it out with O’Reilly on the apron for the finale, with Kyle hitting him with a high kick and putting him out to win at 25:05 to advance to the main event. This was a bit messy and overloaded to start but once we got back from the break it was just non-stop action and awesomeness. **** That being said, it was a bit mid-cardy considering that the prize was going to be a shot at the AEW World title. Like, wouldn’t Hangman Page want to be a part of that?
Meanwhile, Jon Moxley reflects on the weird year he’s been having, and tonight the sport will belong to him.
Pac v. Buddy Matthews
So this is the first match in, you guessed it, a tournament! For, you guessed it, another singles title, this time the “All Atlantic Championship”, which apparently represents all the other countries where Dynamite airs. Winners of the four matches go onto a four-way match at Forbidden Door for whatever the title is supposed to represent. Also what the hell does Canada have to do with the Atlantic ocean? Are they gonna be doing shows in Newfoundland? Hot take: This is kind of a dumb title idea. Buddy goes for the arm to start and we actually get dueling chants as Matthews takes him down with a headlock. They trade kip-ups as they reach a stalemate. Buddy with another headlock, but Pac puts him down and follows with a rana to put him on the floor. And then Pac teases a dive before sliding away to mock him. And we take a break. Back with Pac hitting Buddy with knees on the apron and then a DDT to bring him back in the ring the hard way, and they slug it out before Pac hits a superkick to put him down. Buddy fires back with a high knee, but Pac hits him with a german suplex and lariat and both guys are down. They fight to the top and Buddy brings him down with a sunset flip into a powerbomb for two. Pac goes up and gets caught, but fights back with a poison rana off the top and then goes up with the Black Arrow to finish at 11:21. I don’t care about the title but this was a hell of a match. ***1/2
Meanwhile, Eddie Kingston rants about Jericho and his Society and he wants Jake Hager on Rampage, whenever it airs this week.
Trent Beretta joins us for National Best Friends Day, but he has no friends here. Also he thinks that he and Rocky deserve another shot at FTR. So they come out and agree that Trent has a beef, but he needs to take it up with “Will Ospreay and his bitch boys”. And that brings out WILL OSPREAY and Aussie Open, who beat down Trent and FTR while the crowd goes nuts.
Meanwhile, William Regal is really going to feel bad when he has to watch Moxley kick Kyle O’Reilly’s head in later tonight.
David Finlay v. Hangman Page
Page overpowers Finlay to start, but walks into a dropkick and Finlay takes over with a hammerlock on the mat. Hangman blocks a leapfrog with a slam and beats on Finlay with chops before tossing him out and following with a shoulderblock to the floor. We take a break and return with Hangman hitting the fallaway slam and corner clothesline. He sends Finlay to the floor again and hits him with a pescado. Back in, the powerbomb gets two. Finlay escapes the Deadeye and comes back with a backbreaker for two, but Finlay tries a bodypress and Page rolls through, only for Finlay to reverse into a cradle for two. Page escapes a german suplex and puts Finlay down with a lariat, and the buckshot lariat finishes at 10:34. A very entertaining and hard-hitting match! ***1/4 Afterwards, Hangman complains that he wasn’t allowed to be in the battle royale and won’t be getting a title shot any time soon, so he’s throwing down the challenge to OKADA. However, Adam Cole disagrees with the idea that Page deserves a shot at Okada (and his good friend Jay White might be champion anyway!) and I guess they have a beef again.
Meanwhile, Thunder Rosa throws out an open challenge, so Marina Shafir answers. I was wondering if she had disappeared off the face of the earth after that loss to Jade.
Wardlow joins Tony in the ring, and he explains that he declined a spot in the battle royale because he wants to beat CM Punk and no one else. Fair enough. But his current target is the TNT title, which is currently being diminished by Scorpio Sky. And Sky tries to answer the challenge, but Ethan Page holds him back.
Meanwhile, Smart Mark Sterling is a nice guy and offers Wardlow a chance to face him in a court of law, or else face 20 men in a gauntlet match next week.
Meanwhile, the Young Bucks lounge around in the office and they want the tag team titles back, but the Hardys and Jurassic Express all barge in and Christian offers up a ladder match next week for the tag titles with all three teams. Jungle Boy seems like this wasn’t discussed with him in advance.
AEW World Women’s title: Thunder Rosa v. Marina Shafir
Shafir beats on her in the corner to start, but Rosa takes her down with a wristlock and they trade rollups for two. Rosa chops her in the corner and pounds her with knees, but Shafir gets a suplex as we take a break. Back with Rosa making a comeback with a shotgun dropkick on the ropes and a northern lights suplex for two. Shafir gets her own wacky suplex for two, but Rosa gets a death valley driver for two. Rollup gets the pin to retain at 8:34. Shafir looked pretty nervous here again and it was pretty basic. ** Shafir attacks Rosa afterwards and does some kind of submission move that doesn’t really look effective, but Toni Storm saves and gazes longingly at the title afterwards.
Meanwhile, Jade Cargill and the Baddies talk some smack about “Kristin Highlander” while Stokely Hathaway stands in front of Tony while doing his promo.
Everyone gonna be watching Rampage on Friday for FTR & Berreta v. Ospreay & Aussie Open? Yeah I thought so.
Jon Moxley v. Kyle O’Reilly
They trade wristlocks and Moxley takes him down for two, but Kyle goes for the leg and they engage in some fisticuffs. Moxley wins that and gives us SMALL JOINT MANIPULATION before putting the boots to him and chasing him out of the ring. Back in, Kyle gives him some shots of his own and they slug it out, but Kyle takes out the knee to take over. Kyle ties up the leg in the ropes and hits him with a flying knee as we take a break. Back with Moxley fighting back with a double arm suplex off the top and they do another slugfest and beat the hell out of each other. Kyle hides in the ropes and bites them to try to stay away, so Moxley boots the ropes and continues beating on O’Reilly. Hammer elbows and he goes for the DDT, but Kyle stuffs that one and puts him down with a high kick. Moxley pops up with a cutter and tries a Gotch piledriver, but Kyle reverses to a triangle and then switches to an anklelock on the mat. Moxley punches him in the mouth to break it and follows with a piledriver for two. They slug it out one more time and Kyle hits him with a back drop suplex, but Mox pops up and hits his own, and they throw more bombs until both guys drop to their knees. Mox with a sleeper and he turns it into the bulldog choke, but Kyle won’t tap, so Moxley batters him with knees and follows with the Paradigm Shift to finish at 14:15 and advance to Forbidden Door. Big showing for Kyle O’Reilly here tonight and I’m glad he’s getting a chance to shine lately. This was a hellacious fight. ****1/4
Hot damn there was some great wrestling on this show tonight, and Will Ospreay will slide right into the AEW mix like a duck in water and probably punch his own ticket if he sticks around.