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The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 11.09.85

7th January 2022 by Scott Keith
Rants

The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 11.09.85

What with the Mid-South shows coming to an end in another month and no more likely to be added to the Network in our lifetime, I’ve been perusing the other legal source of episodes, www.universalwrestling.com, but $20 per DVD seems steep and it’s really only 2 episodes per disc and doesn’t, for example, cover the entire UWF TV history because Micah Watts only has so much to sell. But apparently once these are sold out from the site, there will be no more available because WWE owns the rights and masters now, so it’s tempting to get the actual UWF shows just for sake of making sure they’re archived. Of course the other problem is that I don’t really have a great way to play DVDs anymore outside of my PS4 so it’s a bit of a pain to review physical media now.

Taped from Shreveport, LA

Your hosts are Boyd Pierce & Bill Watts

But first, Bill Watts calls out Ric Flair for the UNTRUTH that he will only defend the NWA World title against whoever the North American champion is. And also Bill is disgusted by Flair’s alleged payoff of Dick Slater and Buzz Sawyer.

Meanwhile, Slater and Sawyer talk about the $5000 fines levied against them, the highest fines in the history of Mid-South, just because they beat up Jim Duggan’s old lady. Slater again claims that he gave Flair all his money back, and he’s leaving the area because he’s sick of being treated like this. Buzz Sawyer is MAD because unlike Slater, $5000 means something to him. So Jim Ross, like a ghoul, shows a slow motion replay of Buzz taking a shot from Jim Duggan and falling backwards into an elbowdrop on Jim Duggan’s woman. He’s probably the one who wanted AEW to do multiple replays of Ray Fenix going through the table on Dynamite.

The Bruise Brothers v. Steve Constance & Shawn O’Reilly

I feel like I should recognize whatever song the generic Bruise Brothers music is replacing on the Network but it’s reduced to a generic blues riff here. Constance gets slammed by Porkchop a few times, so O’Reilly comes in and you KNOW someone named O’Reilly has green tights. And he gets nowhere as well. Back to Constance and Boyd holds him for a shot in the corner and Cash never takes it, so they just end up looking stupid. And Boyd finishes with a big splash at 3:00. These guys are SO BAD. 0 for 1.

Ric Flair joins Watts at the desk, and he notes that Mid-South is the peak of the sport. But then Bill confronts him about saying that he’ll only wrestle the North American champion, since he doesn’t actually have the authority to say that. Flair apparently has a lot of pull with NWA “booker” Bob Geigel (what the hell is a “booker”?) and so when he decides something, it’s as good as done. And then Watts keeps pushing him, confronting him about paying off Dick Slater, and Ric doesn’t deny that he did it. But he points out that nothing has happened to Butch Reed yet and yet he’s still out $50,000, so Slater owes him some money back because he lied about returning it. So we get a replay of last week’s segment where Butch Reed calls Dark Journey a “heifer” and a race traitor, and lets her know that black men know how to slap their women around properly, unlike white men.

Back at the desk, Flair again says that Slater is lying about returning the money to him, so he’ll have to take care of Butch Reed himself without Slater’s help.

Eddie Gilbert & The Nightmare v. Nick Patrick & Tommy Wright

So Gilbert and Nightmare are back together again as a tag team, except this time as wrestlers instead of Eddie managing Nightmare. And now they’re managed by Oliver Humperdink again. Humperdink introduces his new/old team with a promo and then shows a tape of Jake Roberts against Humongous from a house show, as Jake hits the DDT and Humongous no-sells it and lays Jake out. So this brings Jake out to the ring to confront Humperdink, as he’s found the way to beat Humongous and it involves some kind of mysterious surprise in a cloth bag. He might be onto something with that gimmick. Wright takes Gilbert down with a hammerlock while Bill Watts discusses rumors of Mid-South crowning a new Junior heavyweight champion with a tournament. Sadly that led to nothing. Wright works a headlock on Eddie as Watts notes that Humongous reminds him of that movie about the Terminator guy who just keeps coming. I dunno, I think he reminds me more of the Road Warrior, where they stole the gimmick from wholesale. Nightmare beats on Wright in the corner while Watts accuses Eddie of rigging the essay contest so that he can keep the picture of himself. Patrick gets a hot tag and a bit of shine on Gilbert, but the HOTSHOT lays him out and Nightmare pins him at 2:55. Amazing how much more effective Gilbert immediately became when they let him do his own thing. 1 for 3.

Hacksaw Butch Reed v. Ricky Starr

Watts implies that Reed will have to give up the TV title and then just outright says Reed is being stripped of it and they’re doing a tournament in two weeks. Starr gets some shots on Reed, but Butch beats on him and hits a clothesline for the pin at 1:00. 1 for 4.

Humongous v. Perry Jackson

Bill Watts thinks people who complain about the hockey mask should SHUT UP. When Bill was a wrestler, guys wore all kinds of paraphernalia and he kicked all of their asses anyway. That’s why wrestling is so great! Humongous lays him out with a clothesline and finishes with the cobra sleeper at 1:30. 1 for 5.

Jake Roberts v. El Corsario

Jake finally reveals what was in the bag earlier tonight: A HOCKEY MASK. Hey, Watts just went on a whole rant about how it’s legal. So he puts the mask on and Corsario slugs away on him, but Jake just ignores him and Watts is all about this. THERE’S NO CRYING IN WRESTLING! You just go get your own damn hockey mask! Jake tries the DDT and Corsario slides out of the ring to escape. Back in, Corsario tries a karate kick to the head, but the mask protects Jake’s head and Corsario sells his bare foot. And the DDT finishes at 2:14. Jake was on fire at this point! 2 for 6.

Ric Flair v. Al Perez

Doesn’t happen, as Butch Reed interrupts and Flair says “Get this monkey out of the ring!” So Reed is tired of Flair talking shit about him earlier in the show, but Flair is scheduled to meet Al Perez and that means something to him. So Reed turns his back on Flair and offers him a free shot, but Flair says he’s not a backjumper…and then jumps him from behind anyway.

Ric Flair v. Butch Reed

Flair hits him with chops in the corner, but Reed slugs back and Flair flops for two. Reed gets a backslide but Flair is in the ropes and calls for time but then hits Reed with a cheapshot and works him over. Flair tosses him and Bill Watts puts over Reed because he plays with pain and Watts RESPECTS that. Flair tries to suplex Reed in, but Butch rolls him up for two. Flair tries to run away and Reed catches him with a sleeper as Watts notes that if Butch can win here, Geigel will have no choice but to give Reed the shot next week. Interesting how they’re suddenly moving the goalposts on that angle, saying for weeks that only the North American champion would get the shot and then suddenly pivoting to “Bob Geigel decides who gets the shot and it’s only Flair who said the North American champ”. Reed gets a suplex for two and pounds on Flair, but Ric takes him down with an atomic drop. Reed gets another backslide for two, but Flair pounds him with chops and Reed hits the shoulder tackle off the ropes for the pin at 6:00 as the crowd goes nuts. And then Dick Slater reveals that he is here, and he did take the money, and attacks Reed and the referee, before delivering a spike piledriver with Flair’s help and then doing a Zeus necksnap on him to put him away. So Reed is out of contention for the World title match next week despite winning a non-title match against Flair. 3 for 7. That one of course had a lot of layers, like an onion, because it was Slater who claimed Harley Race’s bounty on Flair in 1983 and seemingly put him out of wrestling with a spike piledriver. So obviously Flair learned Sid’s lesson about doing unto others but doing it first. A great heavy heat angle to end the show.

But next week…oh man. Ric Flair needs another challenger, and the result is legitimately one of the greatest hours of professional wrestling ever, with no exaggeration needed.

Join us, won’t you?

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