The SmarK Rant for WWE NXT 2.0 – 11.09.21
Live from Orlando, FL
Your hosts are Vic Joseph, Wade Barrett & Beth Phoenix
Toxic Attraction v. Io Shirai, Kacy Catanzaro & Kayden Carter
Of course we open the show with these guys again, and they POSE and they POSE and they get to the ring and pose on the apron and then pose to the hard camera. Well they’ve got that down pat, time to call them up to the main roster! The TikTok Twins dance from the crowd on the way to the ring, which is a rare bit of organic interaction on this very fake show. Kayden quickly gets caught in the heel corner and worked over, leading to Jacy Jayne doing a ridiculous botch where she tries to slingshot into the ring and literally falls 5 feet short of Kayden. Over to Io, who comes in with a legdrag and Kacy slingshots in with a senton for two. The heels all pile up on the entrance side of the ring and the KCs dive onto them, but Mandy Rose cuts off Io with a spinebuster and we take a break. Back with Mandy suplexing Kacy for two and going to a bodyscissors. Io gets a tag and slams Gigi a few times and puts the boots to her in the corner and follows with the double knees in the corner for two. Moonsault gets two. Back to Carter and she runs wild and hits Gigi with a Sister Abigail, but she goes up and Dolan yanks her down and finishes with an abdominal stretch into a rollup at 11:00. An ANGRY rollup. While posing. I don’t really understand what the point of that booking was, they need challengers and beating the babyface team clean doesn’t help anyone. Match was the usual thing where lots of stuff happens and people are running around but there’s no real story to the match and I don’t even think there was a heat segment. **1/4
Meanwhile, Pete Dunne is trying to do a promo, but Carmelo and Trick interrupt and Pete doesn’t know what they’re talking about but he’s really angry at them.
Kay Lee Ray v. Sarray
Kay Lee’s entrance interrupts the post-match posing of Toxic Attraction, so maybe that’s starting a feud. And then we take a break and return with more wacky antics from MSK. I watched this twice and I still have no idea what they were supposed to be doing or why it was supposed to be funny. KLR attacks to start and puts the boots to Sarray, but Sarray rolls into a double stomp and Kay Lee puts her down with a forearm for two. They trade corner whips and Ray gets a DDT for two. Sarray gets a rollup for two and transitions into a very bendy leglock, but Ray makes the ropes. Sarray with a fisherman’s suplex for two. Ray comes back with a superkick, and dodges a dropkick from Sarray to put her on the floor and follows with a Gory bomb onto the table. Back in, another one finishes at 4:48. Apparently the division has been put on notice as a result of the momentum built here. Hopefully social media has been notified. **1/2
Meanwhile, Joe Gacy doesn’t want anyone feeling uncomfortable.
Joe Gacy v. Boa
Boa is apparently the Great Muta now. Well good for him. Gacy sends him to the apron and Boa comes in with a sunset flip for two, but Gacy catches him with a backbreaker for two. Suplex gets two. Gacy goes to a chinlock, but Boa fights back with kicks and then the stupid bullshit starts as the lights flicker and suddenly Boa gains superpowers and chokes Gacy out for the DQ at 3:25. WTF? *
Meanwhile, Diamond Mine watches a replay of Jiro and Kushida doing a promo from last week in order to motivate the Creed brothers.
Meanwhile, Solo Sikoa gets interrupted by Grayson Waller, who tries to throw LA Knight under the bus, and this leads to a three-way match later tonight.
Kushida & Ikeman Jiro v. The Creed Brothers
They pay writers hundreds of thousands of dollars per year and the best that anyone could come up with as a team name is “Jacket Time”? Thankfully Wade Barrett agrees with me and calls them out as having the worst tag team name of all time. Beth defends them but she was one half of “Glamarella” so she can kindly take it outside. The Creeds double-team Jiro and Brutus tries to throw Jiro around, but Kushida comes in and goes after the arm. Julius succeeds in throwing Kushida around with suplexes, but Kushida fights back with a handspring elbow and brings in Jiro. They clear the ring and we take a break. Back with Kushida running wild and Jiro comes in with a swanton on Julius for two. But then Julius strips Jiro of his jacket and powerbombs him for the pin at 8:22. And this brings out Odyssey Jones to chase off Diamond Mine immediately afterwards. I continue to not understand where this is supposed to be going. Am I supposed to want to see someone challenging Roderick for the Cruiserweight title based off this? Creed Brothers selling stuff and being a couple of fellas in a midcard tag team match is not the best use of them. *1/2
Meanwhile, Toxic Attraction is trying to leave and a very enterprising cameraman is nice enough to film them from behind. But then sadly we have to listen to them talk. Small price to pay for Gigi Dolan’s pants, I guess. This guy knows what I’m talking about! And then Raquel pulls up on her motorcycle because now she’s totally a motorcycle riding badass and she drives it right to the ring.
Raquel Gonzalez joins us in the ring and calls out Dakota Kai, who comes out and interrupts, but then Cora Jade attacks to interrupt THAT. Can’t anyone finish a promo on this show? Well except for Joe Gacy, who never shuts up.
Meanwhile at Andre Chase University, someone brings up Chase’s issues with the microphone last week, and he freaks out and throws him out of the class.
Meanwhile, the Grizzled Young Vets are apparently now con artists who steal people’s phone and order food. I don’t even know what to do with this show.
Cameron Grimes v. Ru Feng
Grimes beats on Feng with chops, but gets sent into the corner and Feng goes to an abdominal stretch while Duke Hudson comes out to watch. Did…did Cameron WAX HIS CHEST? Why would they do that? Grimes comes back with a high cross and finishes with the Cave In at 1:40. Afterwards, Duke wants to know if he’s been sharked by Grimes and calls him names, but Cameron isn’t taking that from him and admits he hustled Duke. So next week Duke wants a POKER SHOWDOWN. See Grimes is an actual character with motivations and nuance so this was pretty good.
LA Knight v. Solo Sikoa v. Grayson Waller
Knight and Waller team up on Solo but 2.Uso clears the ring and the heels turn on each other. Solo beats on Knight, but the heels cut him off again and hit a double suplex and take turns dropping elbows on him. They both put Solo on the top and can’t decide who gets to slam him off, which allows Sikoa to fight them off and make the comeback. Knight cuts him off with a neckbreaker but Waller turns on him and hits the stunner. Solo tosses Waller and finishes Knight with a flying splash at 5:00. Lot of nothing here, as Solo is green as grass and I don’t know why he needs to be doing three-ways after one match in the sport. *
Meanwhile, Indi and Persia are doing a promo and Tony D’Angelo interrupts with a Sicilian message for Dexter Lumis. Not how that works. Maybe watch the Godfather if you’re going to rip it off. So what was the point of the past month of stuff with Tony and Lash Legend and the producer? It literally led to NOTHING. And then he just randomly starts a feud with Dexter over nothing.
Elektra Lopez v. Erika Yan
Lopez overpowers Yan and stomps her down to start, and then chokes away on the ropes and finishes with a terrifying powerbomb at 1:22, dropping Yan right on her neck. DUD And then she calls out Xyon Quinn and offers him a spot in the team, but Xyon declines and then clears the ring before having a staredown with Lopez. Honestly LA Knight and Grayson Waller have more sexual tension but I guess this is something for Quinn to do as they just continue to jump from feud to feud, week to week.
Meanwhile, Kyle O’Reilly and Von Forehead challenge the tag team champions. Didn’t they LOSE last week?
Pete Dunne v. Carmelo Hayes
Dunne goes for the arm, but Carmelo springboards off the ropes with a clothesline to take over, but he goes to the apron and Dunne snaps his arm as the announcers debate if Dunne should be in the conversation for a championship opportunity should he win here. And then Dexter joins us on commentary as we take a break. Back with Dunne working the arm and he fights off some kicks from Hayes and hits a knee strike, but Hayes cuts him off with a codebreaker. Hayes with a lariat and a chokeslam for two, but Dunne comes back with a powerbomb for two. They trade kicks and Dunne tries the Bitter End, but Hayes reverses to a suplex into a cutter and both guys are down. Hayes spins into a Gargano Escape, but Dunne bends the fingers to escape and then stomps the fingers off a german suplex. Hayes reverses out of the Bitter End, but Hayes gets distracted by a passing zombie and Dunne hits the Bitter End for the pin at 11:50. And then we learn the zombie is Johnny Gargano as we continue to have the booking flail everywhere like throwing darts at a wall. Really good match with the usual cliché distraction finish and the champion does the job for no reason. ***1/2 See, in the opener, you’d want Dolan or Jayne to take the loss because that creates a challenger for them and they currently have no challengers. But Hayes is already feuding with Gargano (I think) so there’s no point in complicating things further by having Dunne inserted into the feud.
This was just a show where some stuff happened and none of it is leading anywhere. So definitely preparing the next generation for the main roster.