“Good evening, everyone, and welcome to Prime Time Thursday.”
“And the start of a new era! Jack Tunney is out the door!”
“Whatever gave you that idea, Brain?”
“Well, we’re getting a new President, right?”
“The United States is, Brain, not the WWF.”
“Are you sure? I had a full campaign ready with endorsements!”
“You don’t have a clue! Folks, we are counting down the days until December 2, when Jon Moxley next defends his AEW Title against the #1 contender Kenny Omega!”
“You coulda fooled me, Monsoon. Given what everyone’s talking about, I assumed Shaq was involved.”
“Well, he does appear to be on the horizon for one Cody Rhodes down the line. The NBA legend would present a big problem for the Rhodes dynasty.”
“Yeah, but Cody grew up with Dusty; he’s used to big problems.”
“Please. In addition, Thanksgiving is around the corner, and we are headed for Survivor Series, as teams of five…”
“Argue over who’s the captain!”
“…you may have a point on that one, Brain, but it’s teams of five strive to survive. You know, I remember your history with Survivor Series.”
“Don’t go any further, Ape-man. That was a set-up! Jack Tunney concocted some phony drug test! How is it that Tully Blanchard had illegal substances but Roddy Piper was allowed to wrestle, huh? The fix it in, Monsoon — it’s why we need a new President!”
“Like who?”
“Bob Backlund, for example! Our friends at WrestleCrap are scheduled to go live tonight with a look at Backlund’s previous Presidential campaigns!”
“Backlund was a real piece of work, Brain. It’ll be interesting to see what ol’ Art 0’Donnell thinks of him. Folks, enough from us: let’s go to our feature bout tonight, and it’s a match you may have seen on Full Gear, but before they were famous!”
“There’s a time before Chris Jericho was famous? When’s this footage from, 1894?”
“Are you ever a fountain of misinformation tonight! See for yourself!”
(Bring the insanity.)