SMOKY MOUNTAIN WRESTLING TV – May 23rd, 1992
– Last week on SMW TV… It was the Volunteer Slam Preview Show, so no new content to further existing storylines other than “the tournament is coming this week.”
– Taped on April 23rd from the Lincoln Memorial University in Harrogate, TN. Bob Caudle and Dutch Mantell are here to call all the action. Today’s episode is all about MOUNTAIN MAYHEM! Mantell says he’s whooped 15 men on his own before, but with 18 participants, he’s bowed out since that exceeds even his own reputation.
– Parade of Promos! Dirty White Boy with the first promo, saying he can put the $5,000 towards an Iron Lung for Mr. Ron Wright. Jimmy Golden says he needs some pocket change. Tim Horner is gripping his foam lightning bolt. Buddy Landell says he’s going to avoid a bath and stink up the ring so nobody will come near him, then toss the last person out. Stan Lane says he has to fly their women in from Florida like fresh sea food because of how gross and disgusting the local women are. Brian Lee just wants to make sure the Dirty White Boy doesn’t win. Dixie Dy-No-Mite says the Confederate Kick will earn him the money. Danny Davis says he’s probably the smallest, but he’s got speed and brains. Rip Rogers is hollering and screaming, possibly about dives and stupid chants. Doug Furnas caps it off with an even more generic promo than Horner.
– Highlights of The Heavenly Bodies vs. The Fantastics from the May 9th episode. They’re really pushing the injury angle on Jackie Fulton, and once he’s back and healthy, we can expect that rivalry to take off.
– Mountain Mayhem Battle Royal:
18 Participants in all. Two men start, and then at equally times intervals, another man enters the match until everyone has entered, with the last man standing earning the $5,000 prize. Yes, it’s a Royal Rumble, but that’s a trademark of the World Wrestling Federation. Everyone is at ringside to wait for their number to come up. #1 is Dixie Dy-No-Mite and #2 is “Hustler” Rip Rogers. Rogers attacks from behind and chokes Dixie with his Confederate Cape. Dixie comes back with a back drop and running knee lift. Rogers with a blow to the throat, rake of the back, and poke of the eye. Whip and a sunset flip from Dixie is a useless move in this environment. #3 is “The Doctor of Desire” Tom Prichard. Dixie avoids a double clothesline and comes off the ropes with a body press. He hits Confederate Kicks on both, but the numbers game catches up on him. Rogers and Prichard with a double slam and take turns dropping elbows. Dixie blocks and counters a suplex, but Prichard goes back to work on him. #4 is Ben Jordan, and he helps Dixie out. He drives knees and shoulders to the midsection of Prichard. Dixie with a dropkick on Prichard while Jordan stupidly covers Rogers. Twice. IT’S A BATTLE ROYAL! STOP GOING FOR COVERS!
#5 is “Jumping” Joey Maggs. He goes right after Prichard, unloading with rights. Prichard shrugs him off and casually throws out Jordan at 6:26. That’s what you get for being stupid. We return from commercial break, and there’s no loss of in-ring time since this is taped and that would be stupid. Speaking of stupid, Dixie with ANOTHER pin attempt. Even Caudle can’t defend it at this point. Dutch: If you don’t know the rules, don’t play the game. #6 is “The Gangster of Love” Stan Lane. The Heavenly Bodies double team Maggs. Lane lays him out with a clothesline to the back of the head. Suddenly, Bobby Fulton runs in with a 2×4 and attacks the Heavenly Bodies. They exit the ring and run for cover, and they’re declared eliminated at 9:30. #7 is The Dirty White Boy. He targets Dixie, but isn’t doing much but rope hugging. Dixie counters a piledriver and takes Rogers over with a back drop. #8 is “Rock & Roll” Robert Gibson. He mounts the Dirty White Boy in the corner with a flurry of rights. Rogers takes a pair of double back drops from combinations of Maggs, Dixie, and Gibson. Whip to the corner and Gibson drops Rip with a clothesline.
#9 is “Nature Boy” Buddy Landell. He quickly goes after Gibson. Probably got so high he forgot to skip his shower and pre-match strategy immediately. We return from commercial and Maggs has been eliminated at 14:12. Landell tosses Dixie at 14:28. Hopefully nobody will follow in his footsteps and make dumb pin attempts. Gibson cradles White Boy as I say that. Notice the heels aren’t doing it. #10 is “Primetime” Brian Lee, making the save for Poor Mr. Gibson. Lee with an atomic drop to eliminate Rogers at 15:56. Lee and Gibson with synchronized mounted punches on Landell and the Dirty White Boy. #11 is Jimmy Golden. He wastes no time targeting Gibson. Landell lures Lee into the corner, allowing the White Boy to attack from behind. Gibson with biting to avoid elimination. #12 is “Golden Boy” Joe Cazana. I give him 90-seconds, maximum. Lee fights out of the corner since Cazana is a waste of space. We return from commercial with Lee getting stomped down. #13 is Doug Furnas, the World’s Strongest Man. He runs wild and knocks Cazana out with a forearm at 20:57 (lasting a whopping 1:36, just barely exceeding my expectations). Golden gets a boot up on Lee charging into the corner.
#14 is “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff. He lays out Lee and stomps on him like he owes him money. Dirty White Boy joins in since everybody hates Lee. #15 is White Lightnin’ Tim Horner. We’ve got eight men in the ring, the most at any given point thus far. He goes after Orndorff in the corner and wastes no time hugging. Golden misses a clothesline and takes a back drop out at 25:05. Orndorff throws out Gibson at 25:13. #16 is “Bad Boy” Barry Horowitz. He puts the boots to Horner in the corner. We return from commercial with everyone mostly standing around or stepping on Tim Horner. #17 is “Nitro” Danny Davis… and is the LAST man? Are they seriously counting Bobby Fulton as an official participant who never really was introduced?
We’ve got a final field of the Dirty White Boy, Buddy Landell, Brian Lee, Paul Orndorff, Doug Furnas, Tim Horner, Barry Horowitz, and of course, Danny Davis. Furnas and White Boy get tangled up and thrown out together, courtesy of Landell, at 28:04. Landell throws some of his secret stash in the eyes of Horner. Orndorff gives Davis a Piledriver, and surely that will cost him some money, but there’s no rules in the match, so what’s the judgment? Lee tosses out Horowitz at 28:51. Landell gets tossed over and out, but the referee misses it while the White Boy comes back to pick a fight with Lee and helps Orndorff toss him out at 29:15. Horner from behind to toss Orndorff at 29:19, and Landell returns, sneaking up from behind to toss Horner at 29:22 to win the check for $5,000. **1/4 Always hard to rate matches like this. Yes, on the surface, it was a “Royal Rumble”, but there was a lot of hanging around, do-nothing spots in between several moments of interest. Seeing the entire match as babyfaces vs. heels takes the fun out of the match, and then you had people CONSTANTLY going for pin attempts in a battle royal. In a little nugget from the WON, Bob Holly was originally penciled in for the winning spot, but he gave his notice between this and the taping on April 9th in Sneedville.
– Post-match, Tim Horner complains he was robbed of the match and that he legally eliminated Buddy Landell. Bob Armstrong says they won’t go to Instant Replay because it’s the referee’s decision, but next week, we’ll have a one-on-one rematch between Horner and Landell for the $5,000 check.
[b]Final Thoughts:[/b] No mention of the Volunteer Slam (that will be covered in next week’s episode), and seemed like a filler episode despite having a show-long gimmick match to draw attention. On paper, you’d think it would be a must-see match, with some good rivalries already developing and SMW ran tons of Battle Royals, so there might’ve been something worth checking out, but it ended up being a middle of the road, standard affair that I can’t really recommend, and since it’s the entire episode, makes it one that you can easily skip.