Uh oh, another “How to retroactively save WM9” post. You know, Superman learned many times not to try to go back and change the past, because it just never works out. But what the heck, let’s check it out.
Thought this might be a good blog discussion, although this may have been covered before. I recently watched WM9, and although I don’t hate the show as much as others, every time I watch it I always think what they could’ve done to make it a better show. With a few tweaks here and there, it could’ve been up there with other great WM’s. So of course, I had to think about it and come up with a plan like others probably do. And for this card to happen, it really would involve only two little things to make it work:
Convincing Ric Flair to stick around for a couple more months, and Marty Jannetty not pulling a Marty Jannetty the night before the Royal Rumble and showing up in the condition he was reportedly in for his match with HBK (I know, that one is a bit of a stretch and probably makes the following even more pointless than it already is) So here’s what I wish they would’ve done. First, the matches left the same: -Steiners vs Headshrinkers – keep it the same, nice little power tag match -Crush vs Doink – I’m one of the few who actually liked the “fake Doink” thing they did there, it would’ve been fine if they hadn’t repeated it for six months afterwards -Hogan & Beefcake vs Money Inc. – If they wanted to bring Hogan back, this match was fine (just chop like 5-10 minutes off.) Plus the Beefcake angle on Raw to set it up was cool. Hell, give Hogan the tag titles for all I care, maybe that would’ve made him satisfied (that’s a huge reach, I know) -Undertaker vs Giant Gonzales – Undertaker was going through his “fighting giants, monsters & freaks” thing no matter what, so no need to change it. Just get rid of the dumb chloroform thing; that chops like 10 minutes off right there. Maybe Mr. Hughes debuts as Whippleman’s manager, causes a big DQ, and Kamala comes down to even the odds and make his peace with the guy that stuffed him in a casket? Yeah that’s dumb, too. Here’s the matches I would change: -IC title: HBK vs Marty Jannetty – set it up as Marty’s last chance, give them as much time as the Tatanka match, let them go all out and HBK just gets by with a pin. Then maybe over the next few weeks Jannetty (realizing he’ll never get another shot and perhaps HBK’s just better than him) does the whole “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” thing, and joins back up with HBK as a part-time heel Rockers? Can you imagine a heel Rockers vs Steiners match? -Tatanka vs Bam Bam Bigelow – these two feuded after WM anyway, right? Have it start here. Play up Tatanka’s undefeated streak. Throughout the match Bigelow gets more frustrated that he can’t put Tatanka down so he snaps and gets himself DQ’d and beats the ever-loving hell out of him. -Owen Hart/Tito Santana vs Razor Ramon – gotta keep Razor on here, but instead of Backlund I was thinking Owen. They did a little thing during the buildup to the Rumble where Razor took out Owen to get to Bret, so settle it here. I remember reading though that Owen may have been hurt during this time; if so stick Tito in there to keep his WM streak going. Razor wins though no matter who it is. -Mr. Perfect vs Ric Flair – do the career match from Raw here. Save Luger for post WM shows. Heenan’s upset that Perfect retired his meal ticket, so he brings in Luger to deal with it. -Earthquake vs Yokozuna – have the Natural Disasters be the ones to dump Yoko from the Rumble; Yoko wins in a squash. Or if they’re really determined to put Yoko over as a monster, have him face both Earthquake and Typhoon, I don’t care. Promote it as the heaviest match of all time or something. -World title: Bret Hart vs Randy Savage – give Bret a big win over someone that can really put him over as the star of the future. What do you think? If you really want to get wacky, post WM you can have Bret and Savage be “rivals who respect each other” but they’re both leery as Hogan’s around and they know it’s only a matter of time until he sticks his nose in the world title picture. And then Yokozuna can be the monster that all three of them have to deal with? Love to know everyone’s else’s thoughts.